Too Much

I stayed in bed all day. I am so tired of always getting more and more issues with my health and there seems to be no end in sight.  I know getting diagnosed is good, knowing the name of what is going on is freaking wonderful, but, it never ends.  At this point I'd rather my doctors just say your screwed and leave it at that.  I try so hard to always be positive, smile at everyone and hide what's going on.  I'm pretty sure I'm just on the backside of a mania, I know what to expect, I know it will eventually pass but I also can't stop from falling in the hole. I just had an eeg done, I'll get results on the 25th.  I have a tilt table test on the 31st. I just feel like giving up.  I think my body is just not going to hold out much longer and at this point it really doesn't matter.