Non-celiacs discuss their experiences dealing with a friend or loved one with the disease. http://www.celiac.com/gluten-free/index.php Thu, 02 Feb 2012 01:26:18 +0000 60 http://www.celiac.com/gluten-free/topic/89522-how-much-acommodation-should-we-expect/
So... not sure what else I should point out to her. Today she asked me what kind of dish soap would be safe. I don't want to seem nitpicky about stuff but she seems to really want her home to be totally safe for us. What about things like bathroom hand soap? Washing down previously gluteny surfaces? I'm very new to this myself so just getting my home Celiac safe has been a huge undertaking. It seems like such a burden for someone else to do it who doesn't even have Celiac.

I'm so blessed to have such a wonderful sister and don't want to nitpick but she does genuinely seem to want to know what she needs to do. Also, any ideas as to how I can show her my gratitude? She doesn't like gifts so it would have to be some other gesture.

Thanks!
Alissa]]> Thu, 02 Feb 2012 01:26:18 +0000 http://www.celiac.com/gluten-free/topic/89522-how-much-acommodation-should-we-expect/ http://www.celiac.com/gluten-free/topic/89163-help-please-13-year-old-son-sneaking-wheat/
I am new to this forum but 13 year old son is "supposed" to have been gluten free since last April.

To cut a long story short he was really well all over xmas holdiays then got sick as soon as back at school. Luckily for me I can get a print out from the canteen and he has been having wheat products. I had asked him directly before the print out of he had been doing this and he said no!!!!

Obviously I have screamed and shouted but am at a loss to know how to get through to him!

I spend ages cooking for him and buying expensive gluten-free goodies, he really doesnt miss out, but clearly feels he is.

How should I continue with this. 13 is such a tricky age but I feel he should take some responsibility for what he eats, Is that not reasonable? I feel like sayong oh just eat what you want!!!!]]> Sat, 21 Jan 2012 13:15:58 +0000 http://www.celiac.com/gluten-free/topic/89163-help-please-13-year-old-son-sneaking-wheat/ http://www.celiac.com/gluten-free/topic/89147-mom-wants-me-to-end-it-over-his-celiac/
ANYWAY he and I have been seriously talking about taking the next step and making our relationship more...permanent. We've looked at rings, houses, etc. But my mother keeps asking me if I'm sure. If I can handle a lifetime with someone that has his symptoms. I've been doing a lot of soul searching and plain old research into celiac and I really think I can. I understand that marriage is hard anyway. Bringing another person in your life for forever is hard. I have no delusions that it'll be easy. But as far as chronic illness is concerned, this isn't that bad. But she keeps nagging me about it every time we talk. As if he's damaged or broken or something. It frustrates me that she feels that way. And that she doesn't realized she raised a stronger daughter than that. UGH!

He is the best thing that's happened to me, he just happens to have celiac. The desease defines his diet, not who he is. I wish she'd get over it. Anyone else with a similar story?

end rant.]]> Fri, 20 Jan 2012 23:09:59 +0000 http://www.celiac.com/gluten-free/topic/89147-mom-wants-me-to-end-it-over-his-celiac/ http://www.celiac.com/gluten-free/topic/88935-completely-dumbfounded/
My immediate instinct was to begin bashing my face on the counter since it would have been far less painful that the conversation. Luckily I was able to refrain and smile and nod while praying she is incapable of contacting this person. (While my father's family is quite familiar with what I face I doubt my mother will have any better understanding than my husband's mother.)

I'm still dumbfounded by this. I mean how can people... what... huh? Frustrating as this is I'm sure it will be hilarious in a few days once thinking about it doesn't make me cross-eyed.]]> Sat, 14 Jan 2012 13:23:56 +0000 http://www.celiac.com/gluten-free/topic/88935-completely-dumbfounded/ http://www.celiac.com/gluten-free/topic/88906-i-realy-dont-understand-some-people/ Me - Shall i open the window because of the smell?
Her - Yes ...is it smelly?
Me - Yes very much .
Her- Well ...i know its a garbage but i realy love it i could never stop eating it
Isn't it weird that she called her food garbage but she could never stop eating it??? This is crazy...realy i mean ..o.k maybe someone doesnt know that the food is unhealthy....but what kind of sane person whould know that a food is garbage and whould continioue eating it??? I know i dont have the right to judge anyone ...i mean if someone wants to eat stinky smelly full of chemicals products its his own right but...HEY!!! Why do we have the brain??? If you know something is unhealy and you eat it beaucse you cant stop ...well that means that you became addictid to it..and thats one more reason to stop eating it....Does anyone hear about addiction to fruits or to vegetables or to meat??? Fast food,junk food is not food..it looks like food but its not.]]> Fri, 13 Jan 2012 16:24:10 +0000 http://www.celiac.com/gluten-free/topic/88906-i-realy-dont-understand-some-people/ http://www.celiac.com/gluten-free/topic/88904-my-daughters-celiac-testing-was-negativebut-allergy-testing/
Still happy our household is gluten free now. My other kids and myself are feeling so much better despite the negative biopsies.

edited to to add...I meant to post this in the kids section...but oh well. ]]> Fri, 13 Jan 2012 14:02:55 +0000 http://www.celiac.com/gluten-free/topic/88904-my-daughters-celiac-testing-was-negativebut-allergy-testing/ http://www.celiac.com/gluten-free/topic/88875-kissing-i-know-there-have-been-others-like-this/
Should I have my boyfriend brush and floss after eating? I'd feel insane doing that, but if it kept me from damaging myself, I'd definitely ask him.]]> Thu, 12 Jan 2012 14:22:13 +0000 http://www.celiac.com/gluten-free/topic/88875-kissing-i-know-there-have-been-others-like-this/ http://www.celiac.com/gluten-free/topic/88375-need-to-vent-because-mom-is-not-helping/
My mom seems to only understand what gluten free means if I walk her through every single step. She wanted to make a meatloaf the other week, which she did fine with - no CC issues at all!

She's sometimes really good, sometimes really not good. Over the last 4 weeks, she wanted to send cake home with me after Thanksgiving dinner, asked me if I wanted a piece of pie, and offered me a cheese sandwich today, none of it gluten-free. Today I made a mistake and just went off. I felt bad and apologized to her. Mind you, I gave her Living Gluten Free for Dummies to read 5 MONTHS AGO! She still hasn't read it. That was part of why I got so upset today. On top of this being my first gluten-free Christmas, it's been a few mentally and emotionally tough days.

Please tell me she is going to catch on that when she keeps offering me food I can't eat, it's like poking me over and over in the shoulder. And that I'm going to learn how to deal with it better. Gaaaah!]]> Tue, 27 Dec 2011 03:40:11 +0000 http://www.celiac.com/gluten-free/topic/88375-need-to-vent-because-mom-is-not-helping/ http://www.celiac.com/gluten-free/topic/88285-guide-for-familyfriends-available/ I haven't posted in quite awhile, and not sure if this question has been posted or not:

Is there a guide (book, website, blog, pamphlet, anything...) written specifically for family and friends about celiac disease/gluten intolerance?

Mostly because of an elimination diet, and also a quesionable biopsy I have been told by both a GI doctor and a dietician to avoid gluten. Even with that, and all the information that I read and share, my husband just does not 'get it'. He is off work this week and next which should be wonderful, but I am suffering as a result of cc issues. Not exactly the way I want to spend Christmas.

He thinks he does enough to keep food separate, but then won't wash his hands between touching his wheat bread & my food. Or, he'll just brush some of the wheat crumbs off the counter and think it's clean (half the time he doesn't even make that useless attempt).

I was thinking if there was something written specifically for family members it may be helpful for him. There is lots of good info out there, but nothing I have found with that target audience. Maybe I am going to have to write it myself? (With a title something like "Help! I Married a Celiac!")

Thanks for any help in advance.]]> Thu, 22 Dec 2011 16:55:46 +0000 http://www.celiac.com/gluten-free/topic/88285-guide-for-familyfriends-available/ http://www.celiac.com/gluten-free/topic/88206-so-this-week-will-be-interesting/
I tried pointing out that when she eats out she'll mess it up...didn't register.

She also informed me she's drinking lemon juice and it makes her back pain go away.

How can a woman with two degrees be this silly?

So then I started telling her that going gluten-free can be rough - temporary or permanent intolerances. She told me to stop because she didn't want to know.

I summed it up by saying that I won't preach about going gluten-free to anyone - but I will say that if you get sick enough, you'll do whatever needs to be done. And if she keeps it up, and is Celiac, she may end up with a super-leaky gut and unable to eat ANYTHING.

I swear sometimes I could beat her with a stick.

That said, my Mom is my best friend. We talk every day. So, no I won't beat her but she'll know I want to.]]> Tue, 20 Dec 2011 15:30:10 +0000 http://www.celiac.com/gluten-free/topic/88206-so-this-week-will-be-interesting/ http://www.celiac.com/gluten-free/topic/88161-my-kids-cant-have-gluten-so-i-have-to-get-whole-wheat-spaghetti-for-them/
I'll try to keep this short and near the point. She was anorexic in high school until our parents started "hounding" her and then she became bulimic. She survived that, only to still barely eat anything. I should note at this time that women in our family are not typically heavy at all.

On to her kids, HER two kids, the other two are fine. (A little bitterness here as she tends to treat them a little different.) She decided that they were gluten sensitive since they have tummy aches. She had them tested and it came back negative. She decided to put them on a gluten free diet. Ok. Two years later I'm getting close to mastering the gluten free cooking. It took some practice, but I won over the "Gluten-free is taste free" crowd at Thanksgiving. The look on my neice's face was priceless when she asked me which were the ones she could eat and I told her everything.

She started homeschooling the kids this year and apparently their lunch, everyday, is peanut butter, yogurt, and a banana.

I can't count the times I've heard the youngest one ask for more, be told no and then hear "but Momma I'm still hungry."

The last time she took them to the doctor, she was told they were underweight. They do look like they're getting too thin.

Oh yeah and I forgot to mention that when they were babies, if they didn't poop when she thought they should, she was always quick to give them laxatives or even suppositories. Which causes me to worry that maybe she messed with their natural development, which in turn caused their tummy aches.

And finally, does this not sound like she is pushing her eating disorder onto her children? I won't even get started on my Munchausen by proxy theories.

Oops. One more thing that originally sent me here in the first place. She preaches at every family function that her kids can't have anything with gluten. She insists that everyone change how they cook for her two girls. However she serves them whole wheat pasta and whole wheat tortillas. Does this not contradict the gluten-free diet she supposedly has them on? I think she's crazy, but I'm crazy for all my neices and nephews and if cooking gluten-free makes life easier and better for those two, I'll go all out, but does she sound crazy or what?

(First post to a forum ever) Apologies for any spelling or grammatical errors, Thanks for reading!]]> Mon, 19 Dec 2011 06:35:14 +0000 http://www.celiac.com/gluten-free/topic/88161-my-kids-cant-have-gluten-so-i-have-to-get-whole-wheat-spaghetti-for-them/ http://www.celiac.com/gluten-free/topic/88152-glutened-at-xmas-party/ I've been diagnosed for close to ten years and don't mind the diet, but so many times I've had to explain my diet to clueless waiters and well-meaning in-laws and friends with the same frustration and fear getting sick if they don't understand.
My question is this: how do you politely inquire to people who cook for you on whether or not the food is truly gluten free (without sounding like a total psycho)? And how on earth do you say "no thanks" when you're getting the impression that said food item is probably not safe for you to eat? Is there a website I can send people to explain gluten free cooking? I tried Googling "how to cook for someone with Celiac" and couldn't come up with much. I'm a dietitian and my husband is swearing that I should create a website if one doesn't exist already.
I had a former boyfriend dump me when I told him I couldn't eat the (contaminated) dinner his mom had prepared for me, I'm getting desparate!!!]]> Sun, 18 Dec 2011 21:44:53 +0000 http://www.celiac.com/gluten-free/topic/88152-glutened-at-xmas-party/ http://www.celiac.com/gluten-free/topic/88007-christmas-dinner-and-my-mom/
My sister has Celiac and she likes to cheat on her diet, I decided that this isn't for me and I want to be as healthy as possible. She is doing Christmas dinner and my mom is helping her. We are from Europe so a lot of dishes take time to find the right recipe to re-create. I recreated one of the soups and suggested to my mom that instead of making a regular gluten soup we can make this one and everyone can eat it and enjoy it the same because it tastes the same and takes the same amount of time. I even suggested I will make it.

The response I got from my sister was no problem, but my mom said I shouldn't make to much because she will make a regular one as well.

I asked her to make something for my birthday and put gluten free pasta in that I bought, instead she gave me everything prepared and made a separate gluten free pasta and a separate regular pasta.

My mom believes that I am overreacting because my sister cheats on her diet, and she thinks a little gluten won't hurt. I even stopped eating there. I am also considering bring my own food for Christmas.

My dad wants to get tested but she is talking him out of it and won't get tested either because she has no classic symptoms, when in fact she has many that could go with celiac and so does my dad.

I just don't understand why she would want me to get sick

Me and my husband talked about getting the kids on a gluten free trial as well but she watches our kids from time to time and she thinks I am crazy for even thinking to do this.

How do you deal with people like this especially when they are your close family?

I feel so sad and it just makes me want to cry, I just want her to understand and not lie to me, and its not like gluten free foods tastes any worst or that it will kill her.]]> Wed, 14 Dec 2011 00:06:49 +0000 http://www.celiac.com/gluten-free/topic/88007-christmas-dinner-and-my-mom/ http://www.celiac.com/gluten-free/topic/87893-how-do-i-enlighten-hubs-to-emotional-problems/
My DH has been very supportive of me going gluten free. He actually works at PF CHangs part time and knows about CC and knew a bit about the problems. Once I approached it as a potential problem, he was like 'I can see that...". However, I don't think he recognizes the emotional problems that can come from that. From me being glutened or me still recovering. I understand that is a much more difficult area to show. Emotional/personality changes are not something I initally thought of or recognized. However, I have done my research and understand a lot more now. He does not spend much time on the computer and is not research minded like I am. Does anyone have any tips of how I can bring up the topic and have some valid proof to back it up? He has never out right said that these problems are not valid, but he does appreciate valid sources.]]> Sat, 10 Dec 2011 10:11:19 +0000 http://www.celiac.com/gluten-free/topic/87893-how-do-i-enlighten-hubs-to-emotional-problems/ http://www.celiac.com/gluten-free/topic/87684-did-your-partner-support-you/
ANYWAY so food shopping can be a pain here now and my husband is being really unhelpful hes making me feel like i'm such a burden, as i havent had a full diagnoses i have the symptoms its in the family but the doctors can't tell me for sure but they think its likey so they want me to go gluten free............so i just feel it would be easier to put it off after xmas is this okay?


Thanks x]]> Sun, 04 Dec 2011 13:40:59 +0000 http://www.celiac.com/gluten-free/topic/87684-did-your-partner-support-you/