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Going Home For The First Time Since Dx, How To Explain "kitchen Rules" To My Mom?


BelleVie

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BelleVie Enthusiast

I'll be going home next month to visit my parents, and it's the first time I'll be home since being diagnosed. I'll be staying for a month, so I guess I will need to have my own area for food in the pantry/fridge/etc. I asked my mom to grab a skillet and a cutting board for me, which she did. I'm just wondering the best way to explain to her how I need to eat, and what needs to be done to avoid CC. Here are the main issues I'm planning on talking to her about:

 

-having my own gluten free space for my non-refrigerated foods

-having my own cutting board and skillet

-not double dipping in condiments (i plan to buy new ones for myself and label them gluten-free)

 

Is there anything else I should cover? I'll be making all of my food myself, so that should not be an issue. My mom is also obsessed with cleanliness, so crumbs on the counter top won't be an issue either. 

 

Mostly I'm just afraid of talking to her about these things because I'm afraid she is going to be judgmental, or think I'm being too obsessive. Any advice on the best way to approach this? 

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KCG91 Enthusiast

Oh boy I feel your ... not pain, but you know, on this. I was diagnosed at uni and it was a few months before I went home. But we managed fine! 

If your mum is super-clean and you're making your own food yourself it sounds like you're mostly there to me. Keeping all your food wrapped/covered, not baking with flour if any of your food or equipment that you will use is out on the counters, not toasting your stuff?

 

How about separate utensils? Being careful if cooking gluten foods near yours - my Mum's only real slip up was steaming veg I was meant to eat above a pan of gluten pasta, which then bubbled up into my veg so I couldn't eat it. Deep frier oil? 

 

It is difficult to talk to people about, but I've learned the hard way with my flatmates that if you try to minimise the risk in order to appear laid back it will bite you on the a***, because it's hard to go back on it later when you find them doing something which puts you at risk. Hopefully as you'll be cooking with her she'll pick up on your good habits quickly :) Maybe you could send her the Newbie 101 stuff? Good luck!

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GF Lover Rising Star

Hi Bells.  You'll need a toaster or toaster bags, colander and cooking spoons etc. if their's are plastic and storage containers.  Use top shelf in refrigerator and also in pantry or put your dry goods in a storage container with a lid.

 

Have fun visiting home.

 

Colleen

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NoGlutenCooties Contributor

Every person and every member of any family is different and understands things differently, so you are probably in the best position to know how to word things to get through to them.  But one thing that has worked for me is to explain that getting even a crumb is like getting food poisoning.  And just like one little microscopic critter can make someone sick enough to have to be hospitalized... one crumb that you don't even see can make you sick for days or even weeks.  And crumbs don't die.  So it isn't a cleanliness or sanitation issue.  A fully sterilized crumb will still make you sick.  Many people don't quite get that difference at first.

 

Good luck and enjoy your time with your parents!

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BelleVie Enthusiast

Oh that's good advice, to send her the newbie link. I'll do that. And you're right about being firm from the beginning. I have a varied dietary history (vegetarian, vegan, raw foodist, etc) which was all done to try and get my health sorted, so my family is used to me having dietary restrictions, but this is, obviously, quite different, so I hope I can get them to understand. 

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KCG91 Enthusiast

Glad it helped :) I'm vegetarian too - just before Christmas my Mum goes 'well I can cope with the vegetarianism but I'm just not sure about the gluten free as well'... :S She is usually really good about it all so I was surprised but did go to lengths then to explain the difference. She hasn't mentioned it again ;)

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w8in4dave Community Regular

I think having her read up on it is a good thing. You know all this can be so overwhelming to us! Let alone someone eles. Just make sure she realizes how important it is you eat NO Gluten, show her labels with and without Gluten. I think once people see it , it helps with the understanding of it. I make sure people know it is a medical condition. All my friends are so understanding. It has been a few months for me. I am still learning. So it may be hard for your mom to get it in a month. Don't be too hard on her :) Good luck and have fun! 

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anti-soprano Apprentice

It sounds like your mom is already receptive and doing what she can to help make things go smoothly for you. When my husband and I visit home, his mom is a lot more accommodating to my diet than my mom. I will eat my mother-in-law's food, but there's no way I'm putting something my own mother made in my mouth! She keeps forgetting too. A few months ago, after being gluten free for over a year, she told me to eat shredded wheat to stay regular. Really, Mom??  Have fun on your trip and try not to worry :)  It will take some time, but everyone will learn to accept it in their own way. 

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howlnmad Newbie

Oh that's good advice, to send her the newbie link. I'll do that. And you're right about being firm from the beginning. I have a varied dietary history (vegetarian, vegan, raw foodist, etc) which was all done to try and get my health sorted, so my family is used to me having dietary restrictions, but this is, obviously, quite different, so I hope I can get them to understand. 

 

It's going to be a big help with her being used to you already having dietary restrictions. The big thing that she is going to have to get used to is what utensils she uses while preparing foods. That seems to be one of my biggest downfalls, grabbing the wrong dang spoon :o .

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w8in4dave Community Regular

Ohhh I know howlnmad, I now keep a sink full of soapy water handy when I am cooking. If for some reason my spoon goes in Gluten, I throw it in the soapy water. I have a special spoon just for my gluten-free stuff. I will set it away from the stove so noone can pic it up and start using it in another pot. I will make strict rules, Noone touches this pot of food! It is mine so hands off! Touch what ever eles you want but this pot and this spoon is off limits! :) I don't want to sound like a greedy person but, it has to be that way. Hubbs understands. 

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BelleVie Enthusiast

Aw thanks, everyone. Unfortunately, I got hit my very first day home. I'm trying to figure out what it was. May have been the electric can opener, which is a bit dirty AND lives right next to the toaster in a cabinet. Ugh, I hate this! 

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w8in4dave Community Regular

Ohhhh so sorry! 1st day huh? Well hopefully your next days will be better! 

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