I Think We're Going To Start Trying

[Guest BERNESES]

Hi everyone- i just need some reassurance. My husband and I got amrried in October of 2004 and I found out I had Celiac's about 4 months later. It' s been a heck of a year but I've been gluten-free for almost a year now, I'm 38 years old and it seems like we better get going!

I think my two biggest concerns are fatigue and feeling sick during pregnancy. As it is, I'm always tired (but part of it, I think was depression and my body healing). For instance, I had my two year old niece for the weekend and by the end of the weekend, I was like, "How do people do this full-time?" I'm STILL tired and it's Tuesday! My energy definitely has not come back yet.

The other thing I'm worried about is feeling sick my entire pregnancy. I am micro-sensitive to gluten (can't even have it in the house) and I get SO sick when I have an accident. How do you cope with that? I am really, really careful but incredibly sensitive.

I worry that I won't be able to handle having children because when I get glutened, I go down for at least a day.

I guess I just want some advice from people out there (and a little encouragement wouldn't hurt either ) Thanks, Beverly

[Guest nini]

As long as you are sticking to the gluten free diet, you should be fine... I wasn't gluten-free when I was pregnant with my daughter, and while I was very ill, I still managed to work up until the last 3 months... If you find a good gluten-free prenatal vitamin that will help a lot. Those prenatal vitamins are THE BEST!

Yes it can be done... you can do it!

[jerseyangel]

Bev--how wonderful. I think that by now, you have the gluten-free thing down and can handle anything regarding the Celiac pretty routinely. Having cleaned the gluten and other offenders out of your diet, you are probably more healthy now than ever. I did have morning sickness (actually all day!) with both boys, but it only lasted 12 weeks and the nausea was no worse for me than I was used to in those days, anyway. Us Celiacs may have a 'leg up' on others because we're used to handling stomach issues. And not everyone gets it anyway. I'm happy and excited for you both

[Guest BERNESES]

Bev--how wonderful. Us Celiacs may have a 'leg up' on others because we're used to handling stomach issues. And not everyone gets it anyway. I'm happy and excited for you both

Thanks Nini and Jerseyangel! You have a good point- I can probably "stomach" anything with the best of them Beverly

[Lisa]

B:

You look so different from your wedding picture. Pretty as well. Sorry, you know me, I can't help with the baby issue. Don't let this stop you. My girls have brought me tears and joy and I wouldn't trade it for the world.

Lisa B.

[Guest BERNESES]

oops- sorry Lisa. I was trying out a new avatar. Didn't like it though. My wedding was pre gluten free and that last avatar was after I went gluten-free. I didn't know you had 2 girls! That's awesome!

[Nantzie]

Well, I can help you with advice on how to deal with days when you can barely do anything. I had really bad back problems, a newborn, a 19-month-old and no help. I had to think outside the box to just get through the day most of the time.

For the first couple of months, the baby can't even roll over, so if you have to get to the bathroom, you can just put the baby down on a blanket with some toys.

Once the baby gets mobile and rolls or scoots around, get some baby gates and make the area you spend the most time with the baby in (usually the living room) like a big playpen. Meaning, nothing in the room that can hurt the baby. In our living room, we just have the couches, a playpen and toys. We're lucky enough that we our entertainment center is built-in, so we don't have to worry about that. If you have an entertainment center or big furniture, they make furniture straps for securing furniture, so it doesn't fall over. They have the furniture straps at baby stores along with all the other safety products.

We have an open floorplan in our house, so we don't have a doorway that just blocks off the room. So we got a Configuregate. Open Original Shared Link It makes it so easy. I've got the original three panel section, plus SEVEN extensions. So you can go as huge as you need to and it works totally fine.

It really gives me peace of mind, because there were many, many times, before I found out about gluten that I literally had to run to the bathroom with no warning and leave my kids in the gated off living room by themselves. I never had any problems. And those days when my back was out so bad that I could only do the necessities like change diapers and make bottles, it was great because I could be in there with them without needing to entertain them. And on the good days, I could do whatever I needed to do (laundry, take out the trash, cook, do the dishes, etc.) without worrying that they were going to get into something they weren't supposed to.

When I was pregnant with my first, I totally got the whole house completely babyproofed. I felt like it had to be perfectly safe before she was even born. Then when I got her home and she basically just laid there, it cracked me up. I think that when we're planning for our first baby we tend to kind of think of their whole infant/toddler phase all at once. But it does go in smaller phases. At first, you're just not going to have to worry too much about it.

Plus, with the baby gates closing everything off, you don't have to worry as much about the rest of the house. The only time my kids were EVER outside the gates during waking hours was when we were all playing together and my attention was completely on them. (My daughter is older now, and has run of the whole downstairs, but my son is still gated for now.)

Nancy

[Lisa]

B:

Yup, two daughters, 22 and 24. Catherine working in Wilmington, NC as a Chemist, Annie is still at home and working on her BA in Early Education. She is getting married in six months and I am starting to freak.

Everyone that she has ever met, she wants at the wedding. Whoe is me!!!

Go for it babe, you will never regret it if you both want children. My mother was 42 when I was born. If this is in your heart and your husbands, do it. You can rise above the celiac issue to bring a precious unioned soul into your life.

xxoo

Lisa B.

[Guest BERNESES]

You guys are the BEST! Thank you so much, Beverly

[Jnkmnky]

Well, I was sick as a dog with all three pregnancies. Hyperemesis? sp? Anyway. You never know how your body will react to a little PERSON growing inside it. You may feel great. I felt like crap. And I took care of three kids while my husband was deployed for 6 months. I had pneumonia, a broken toe, a pulled back, sick kids... not all at once but, hey, I survived and no matter what you go through, you will have the supernatural strength of a MOM.

[Merika]

Hi Beverly,

I am contemplating the same thing - getting preg and how to deal with that, and the baby afterwards, and the up/down days of celiac - and I already have one kid, lol

All I can say is get thinkin about some ideas for support. Do you have family nearby? Would you be willing to hire someone? Is there even a neighborhood kid who really likes babies and has free time? I grossly underestimated the amount of energy having a baby would take (this was pre-gluten-free) and with worsening celiac, I really needed way more support than what I got or asked for. I am trying to plan this better for #2. My health is not perfect, but I'm not getting younger, and having kids isn't one of those things you can really put off forever. Life is just not perfect.

My dad now helps out 4 afternoons a week. Thank god!!!! It has enabled me to get some of my health back. So has eating gluten-free of course.

During preg, I felt better than not preg in general. I had some nausea at the beginning, but as someone else pointed out, you are probably already well equipped to deal with that. What I was most suprised at was the extreme asleep-on-the-couch all day i felt at the very beginning before I knew i was preg. After 3 months, i had tons of energy glorious energy that lasted up until ds's birth.

Best wishes,

Merika

[Idahogirl]

Beverly,

Children are ALWAYS a blessing, regardless of the situation! If you want one, and you are not insane or totally broke, have one! Or two, or three! We teeter-tottered whether to have a third, since ours are 5 and 10, we weren't sure about returning to the diapers, potty-training, and all the other (major) changes a baby brings. And money was an issue. But in every case, you make it work. I look back on when my son was a baby, and I don't know how I did it. But it didn't seem so hard at the time, when I was in the thick of it. Like was mentioned before, there are all kinds of stages, and it doesn't all come on you at once. When you are a mother, it just comes naturally, and you figure things out as you go.

And remember: your baby has never had any other parent. They won't know if you're not doing everything perfectly. They won't know that the baby down the street gets held and coddled all day. They won't know that mom leaving them for a second to run to the bathroom is not the norm for all babies.

Supermoms only exist in the movies. No one is every totally ready or prepared for a baby. But it's the greatest joy you will ever know, and you only have one life! Good luck, I hope you get pregnant the first month you try!

Lisa

[Canadian Karen]

Hi Beverly,

I also was on gluten for all my pregnancies. I asked my GI specialist recently how I possibly got through all those pregnancies while poisoning myself with gluten, and he said that it is his experience that celiac disease seems to be kind to pregnant women, our body makes it through somehow.....

When I was in my early 20's, I was told I would have a 50/50 chance of ever being able to conceive a child due to endometriosis. By the time I got married, I was 29. We figured we would start trying right away since we figured it would take maybe a couple of years to conceive. 4 months later I was pregnant. (I was gluten-free for a few years in my early 20's until they decided that it wasn't celiac after all since I hadn't responded to the gluten-free diet). My second pregnancy basically was a carbon copy of the first. I didn't have a day of morning sickness, and turned out having more energy than I thought was possible. In my 8th month, I went cleaning crazy (I guess that's the nesting factor), and was like a lean (well, maybe not...), mean, cleaning machine! Also, I should mention, I was ALWAYS fairly skinny, never gaining weight. Well, with my first pregnancy, I gained 78 lbs., with my second 48 lbs.

When Rhiannon was almost two, we decided to maybe try to have baby #3. After six months of "should we or shouldn't we", I finally said to Terry, "Okay, we'll let God decide, if it's meant to be, it's meant to be". (I knew Terry really wanted to try for a boy.....) The next month, I was pregnant. The month after that, found out it was twins. But wait, boy oh boy, was this pregnancy different. I was sick as a dog EVERY day of the pregnancy. I firmly believe that because it was boys, my body reacted differently. I was two months shy of my 38th birthday when I gave birth to them (9 weeks early). Shortly after that, I was again PROPERLY diagnosed with celiac disease via blood work and have been gluten-free ever since........

My point is that even though celiac was ravaging my system, somehow my body compensated for it's shortcomings to be able to carry these babies..... Our bodies really are remarkable things.....

I say go for it! I have four beautiful gifts from God that are miracles to me and I feel blessed every single day for the joys that they bring me......

Hugs.

Karen

[Roxyk]

Hi! My husband & I were married in May 2003 & started trying to have a family then. In June 2004 I was diagnosed with celiac. On July 3, 2005 we found out I was finally pregnant. I had been gluten free for one year & finally had 3 normal periods. I was 37 at the time.

Pregnancy has been incredible. I feel wonderful - better than ever. I am VERY careful with food, the only problems I have had have been due to inlaws that "don't believe me" & rarely tell the truth on what they cook with.

I have had no morning sickness, but I have been incredibly tired. All you can do is sleep.

I am due in 9 weeks & honestly will miss being pregnant. It is a wonderful feeling to wake up to a little one moving all around & it's just between the two of you. Although I will admit to backaches & heartburn now!

good luck

[Erikalynn]

I had my first baby 17 months ago--only 6 months after my celiac diagnosis. Morning sickness was very hard because all I wanted was a piece of toast and nothing else. Rice bread doesn't cut it. However, if you can handle yeast and can get used to the bean flours, Bob's Redmill has a great gluten-free breadmix that tastes really similar to white bread. I wish I had known about that when I was sick as a dog.

I would recommend that if you need to gain weight, that you do so before you get pregnant. I was around 130 lbs. (at 5'9") and when I got morning sickness (lasted until my 13th week) I lost weight and couldn't gain weight my entire pregnancy until the added water, blood, placenta, baby stuff really kicked in. But I was back down to my normal weight within a few days after delivering. Also, nursing made me hungry non-stop and I felt like I spent those 13 months just eating and eating and eating. I didn't gain a single pound, either. Nature's Sunshine makes a great prenatal that is gluten-free and food-based and has a little ginger so it never made me sick.

I never felt tired throughout pregnancy. Only after the baby was born and up till now I struggle with energy. But having your own child and taking care of another person's child is so different and believe me, you will do it without even having to think about it.

You should also find a doctor who can understand celiac disease with pregnancy. I couldn't find a doctor who was knowlegeable and it really made my pregnancy that much harder. My doctors treated me like my gluten-free lifestyle was a choice made by my neurotic mind to abuse myself or something. It's really hard to find doctors who don't treat you like a mental, even the doctor who diagnosed me!

My second trimester was heavenly. I loved being pregnant. The weight gain issues were the only thing. You have to basically use your mind to control your fears and anxieties and allow yourself to be free to enjoy each precious moment of carrying your child.

Just tell yourself you'll make it through and dismiss all fearful thoughts. Children are a precious gift from God and if He gives you one, He'll see you through the whole way!

God bless!

[Guest BERNESES]

Thanks so much for all your kind words and encouragement. Something must have clicked because I woke up this morning thinking, "I want to be pregnant." My period is two days late and I'm actually secretly hoping I won't get it Wouldn't it be nice if it was that easy. You have all been so inspirational- what a phenomenal group of women yo all are!

[happygirl]

ohhh----now you have to keep us updated, beverly!

[Guest nini]

it would be nice if it was "that" easy! LOL! Good luck!

[Idahogirl]

I read somewhere that 25% of women get pregnant the first month they start trying. I went off the pill and got pregnant that very next month, so it wouldn't be that unusual at all! I was starting to read about basal thermometers and tracking my ovulation, thinking it would take at least a few months. I really couldn't believe it when I saw the two lines!

[jerseyangel]

It happened quickly for me, also. The first month we began trying for a 2nd. child, I got pregnant with Matt.

[jenvan]

Excited for you and what's ahead--do keep us updated! I have 4 friends with babies coming in the next few months...I'm in the stage of life...less marriages, more babies!

[cgilsing]

Oh B, I'm so excited for you! I'm sure you will do fine! I think in the first few months there isn't a whole lot that can be done to ease morning sickness (a stupid name for something that lasts all day) and tiredness. I have been lucky during my pregnancy to have an employer that has worked with me to adjust my schedual to something that is do-able for me. If you are just too exhaused in the morning, or find that you have to sit still for a half hour after you eat in order to keep it down, you might talk to your boss about letting you come in a little bit late and then making it up in the evening....it doesn't work for everybody, but at least in my situation I found that people were really willing to help!

I've also found as my pregnancy has gone along, that for whatever reason I don't seem to be having as lengthy reactions to accidental glutening.......it's happened a few times (very scary, but doesn't appear to have affected the baby any) Normally my reactions last up to a week, but the last 2 times I had a problem it only lasted about 2 days. I don't know why that is, or if it's that way for everyone, but I like to think that your body knows it is already in a fragile state and tries to protect it. Good luck to you! I'm sure you will do just fine!

[Canadian Karen]

Happened that way for me too. For six months, we were, "Should we or shouldn't we?", finally I said "Pal, we'll let God decide, if it is meant to be, it will happen". The very next month I was pregnant, and it was twins!!!! Talk about "meant to be", eh? LOL!

Karen

[Guest BERNESES]

Hello all- sorry I haven't responded in a bit but my computer is on the fritz. The letters "tyghbnm" and the numbers 5 and 6 don't work so I'm on my DH's computer right now. Hopefully I'll resolve the situation with mine shortly. In the meanwhile, i just wanted to say a great big THANK YOU for all your kind words and advice. I'll keep you posted! Beverly

[Guest MyKidsMom]

I had 2 pregnancies close together (19 mos. apart) and this was before I knew I had c/d - it was after my second pregnancy when I still had aches and pains after 6 mos. that I began to figure out it was something other than just from the pregnancies.

I felt rough my first pregnancy, but that was b/c I had an infection from an exam (something wasn't sterile) and the infection ran rampant in my body for almost 4 months. But after that was figured out I felt great! I was tired off and on but I don't know if anymore than any other pregnant woman. My second pregnancy went even better and no morning (all-day) sickness.

As far as keeping up with the kids...they sleep a lot in the beginning and so I did, too. And then when they start moving around I just made the house baby-proof for those unexpected quick trips to the bathroom. The one thing I figured out fast was to bathe them somewhere where I didn't have to lean over the tub, like in the kitchen sink. Otherwise, from leaning over, I would get sick almost all the time and then be in a pickle because I had a little one in the bath. For my older child, I just make sure my husband is around so that when I get sick he can watch her while I run to the other bathroom.

During the pregnancy and after I found that walking really helped me stay regular and feel good. Kept my swelling down and the blood circulating. I had a lot of numbness in my limbs when sleeping. I would just take short walks and keep close to the house in case I got some rumbling in my tummy or had to go potty, again! I also did water aerobics and they felt great b/c it takes all the weight off your ankles...kind of stinks coming out of the pool, tho, and back to the reality of weight I think the water aerobics really helped my labors, too. I had wonderful labors! I was so amazed at what my body could do and this was before I knew I had c/d.

My first daughter we found out could not tolerate dairy. I nursed her and could not have ANY tiny bit of dairy in my diet or she would have blood in her stool. The doctor had no idea what was going on and we only found out by accident. He had never seen a children so sensitive before.

Oh, last thing, did I mention we had been trying for 7 years and had finally scheduled IVF for the next summer? Doctors said I would never get pregnant on my own. Shows you what they know...both times we got pregnant w/o any help!

Good luck! I miss being pregnant! And after all that you have been through I am sure you will be more than tough enough...even if you question it at times!