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Laugh Of The Day


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#31 Canadian Karen

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Posted 25 August 2006 - 06:32 PM

All of you "hoverers" would love Paris.

When I was on my honeymoon, we went to party for the day at Jim Morrison's grave at Pere Lachaise Cemetery. I had to go REAL bad as there is much drinking that goes on there (an experience of a lifetime - I felt like I was at Woodstock!) and when I went into the public restroom, they are "stand up" ones, complete with feet painted on the floor to show you where to place your feet while you squat down and let 'er rip! I swear, I couldn't do it! I just couldn't get my body to go without having the toilet bowl underneath!
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Karen

positive bloodwork, positive biopsy
Celiac, collagenous colitis, hypothyroidism
endometriosis (at age 20)
spinal stenosis (early 20's)

Biopsy August 2006 confirmed complete villous atrophy despite being gluten-free for years and bloodwork within range showing compliance with diet. Doctor has confirmed diagnosis of Refractory Celiac Sprue.
Endoscopy also showed numerous stomach ulcers, have started taking Losec.

Mother to Eileen 13 yrs
Rhiannon 8 yrs
Daniel & Connor 6 yr twin boys......

"Joyfulness keeps the heart and face young. A good laugh makes us better friends with ourselves and everybody around us."
Orison Swett Marden


Laughter is the shortest distance between two people.
-- Victor Borge



"An optimist laughs to forget. A pessimist forgets to laugh."
Tom Nansbury


"Doctor to patient: I have good news and bad news. The good news is that you are not a hypochondriac."
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#32 CarlaB

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Posted 26 August 2006 - 08:08 AM

All of you "hoverers" would love Paris.

When I was on my honeymoon, we went to party for the day at Jim Morrison's grave at Pere Lachaise Cemetery. I had to go REAL bad as there is much drinking that goes on there (an experience of a lifetime - I felt like I was at Woodstock!) and when I went into the public restroom, they are "stand up" ones, complete with feet painted on the floor to show you where to place your feet while you squat down and let 'er rip! I swear, I couldn't do it! I just couldn't get my body to go without having the toilet bowl underneath!

This is more my problem ... I could stand and hover all day, but the work wouldn't get done!
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gluten-free 12/05

diagnosed with Lyme Disease 12/06

#33 elye

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Posted 26 August 2006 - 08:11 AM

All of you "hoverers" would love Paris.

When I was on my honeymoon, we went to party for the day at Jim Morrison's grave at Pere Lachaise Cemetery. I had to go REAL bad as there is much drinking that goes on there (an experience of a lifetime - I felt like I was at Woodstock!) and when I went into the public restroom, they are "stand up" ones, complete with feet painted on the floor to show you where to place your feet while you squat down and let 'er rip! I swear, I couldn't do it! I just couldn't get my body to go without having the toilet bowl underneath!

You, know, Karen, that's fascinating, because I had exactly the same problem during both pregnancies, when I was give a HUGE (I mean, like four-litre) plastic jug to collect 24 hours worth of urine to have tested for various things. It was too big to put under me while sitting on the toilet, so I had to try to do it with my legs only slightly bent. And I just COULD NOT GO. My subconscious, I guess, would not let it happen. Our bodies work in interesting ways...I'd be in big trouble in Paris, I guess!
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Emily

diagnosed type one diabetic 1973
diagnosed celiac winter 2005
diagnosed hypothyroid spring 2006

But healthy and happy! Posted Image


11 year-old Son had negative blood panel, but went on gluten-free diet of his own volition to see if his concentration would improve, his temper abate, and his energy level would increase. Miraculous response!

The great are great only because we are on our knees.
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#34 Rikki Tikki

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Posted 26 August 2006 - 10:13 AM

This could be just about any one of us (girls that is........)..........

http://img.villageph...6660/toilet.JPG

:lol: :lol: :lol: :lol:


:lol: :lol: :lol: :lol:

ewwwwwwwwwwwwwwwww...I don't care what any of you say, I would LICK my cell phone before sitting on a toilet....I only sit on my toilets, and my mom's, pretty much no one else'e - - phobia since early childhood... :o

:lol: :lol: :lol:

This is more my problem ... I could stand and hover all day, but the work wouldn't get done!

I am with you Carla, I just couldn't do it, it just won't come out. I can't go outside either, I peed all over myself years ago and now just can't do it no matter how badly I have to go!
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Nostaglia is a file that removes the rough edges from the good old days!!!!

" 15 years of it's stress!"
"blood work show's a disease called celiac,
but it can't be that because it's rare!"
Diagnosed via blood and biopsy 2003


Not a medical professional just a silly celiac
offering support, my
experience and advice

#35 Carriefaith

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Posted 26 August 2006 - 10:26 AM

I would LICK my cell phone before sitting on a toilet....I only sit on my toilets, and my mom's, pretty much no one else'e - - phobia since early childhood...

I usually put toilet paper all around the seat.
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Carrie Faith

Diagnosed with Celiac Disease in March 2004
Postitive tTg Blood Test, December 2003
Positive Biopsy, March 3, 2004

#36 jerseyangel

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Posted 26 August 2006 - 10:35 AM

I usually put toilet paper all around the seat.

Yea--this is what I always do. Lots of it--not just one layer ;)

I don't think I could manage the squat thing--my legs are pretty short :lol:
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#37 Carriefaith

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Posted 26 August 2006 - 10:46 AM

Yea--this is what I always do. Lots of it--not just one layer

Up to 3 layers are sometimes required ;) I usually squat when someone has peed a lot on the seat. I'll lift up the toilet seat with toliet paper.
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Carrie Faith

Diagnosed with Celiac Disease in March 2004
Postitive tTg Blood Test, December 2003
Positive Biopsy, March 3, 2004

#38 jkmunchkin

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Posted 26 August 2006 - 12:56 PM

I have never SAT on a toilet in a public bathroom! (I'm a squatter/hoverer) :lol:


LOL!! I went to Woodstock in '99 and I always say the most valuable skill I learned was how to pee standing up!!
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Jillian

Positive Blood test and Biopsy
Inflamed stomach lining
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Tarrytown, NY


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#39 KaitiUSA

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Posted 26 August 2006 - 05:37 PM

haha yea thats us for sure
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Kaiti
Positive bloodwork
Gluten-free since January 2004
Arkansas

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#40 debmidge

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Posted 27 August 2006 - 04:18 AM

I am in agreement with CarlaB. Even as teen & young woman when at my best physical condition I couldn't hover without falling left or right.

And when I had uterine tumors I was having to pee like a pregnant woman all the time and I am lactose intolerant so I am and was in ladies room more than my fair share for a while there.
Anyway, during the month my Dad was in Sloan Kettering Hospital in NYC - in there the bathrooms for visitors are Unisex and at that time NYC was in a crisis about TB and a lot of TB patients were at Sloan.
I started carrying a small spray bottle (actually a small plastic empty bottle originally used for eyeglass cleaning stuff) filled with 90% rubbing alcohol.
I would spray the seat first then paper it.
And spray the door handle and the toilet handle and the handles for the sink, etc.
Nowadays I just spray the seat all around and try to spray somewhat under the seat;
sometimes I will get toilet paper in hand and hold seat up and spray the underside of the seat.
Sometimes others in ladies room will comment on smell of alcohol, but I ignore them.

This is my way of dealing with this issue.
And maybe a public phone is germier than a toilet seat,
but I am not putting my privates near a
public phone any time soon,
so that comparision is irrevelent.
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Husband has Celiac Disease and
Husband misdiagnosed for 27 yrs -
The misdiagnosis was: IBS or colitis
Mis-diagnosed from 1977 to 2003 by various gastros including one of the largest,
most prestigious medical groups in northern NJ which constantly advertises themselves as
being the "best." This GI told him it was "all in his head."
Serious Depressive state ensued
Finally Diagnosed with celiac disease in 2003
Other food sensitivities: almost all fruits, vegetables, spices, eggs, nuts, yeast, fried foods, roughage, soy.
Needs to gain back at least 25 lbs. of the 40 lbs pounds he lost - lost a great amout of body fat and muscle
Developed neuropathy in 2005
Now has lymphadema 2006
It is my opinion that his subsequent disorders could have been avoided had he been diagnosed sooner by any of the dozen or so doctors he saw between 1977 to 2003

#41 tiredofdoctors!!!

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Posted 28 August 2006 - 12:07 PM

OMG -- just saw this . . . Karen, you have to be the funniest person I have ever met! That is FANTASTIC!!!!!

Also, just read the most recent posts . . .. if any of you have had a urodynamics study . . . well, let's just say that there's this "maxi-pad" shaped funnel that you eventually have to pee into while standing up . . . so they overfill my bladder, I think it's going to explode, and they tell me that I have to pee, IMMEDIATELY. I told him "I can't." He asked me why . . . I told him that it was because girls pee squatting and boys pee standing up (must have sounded like a kid . . . ) He told me that REGARDLESS of the rules, I HAD to pee . . my bladder was overfilled, and I HAD to. I said , "I can't. I'm serious." It took FOREVER for me to be able to go . . . . it felt WEIRD!!!!!
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Lynne

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"There's not a word yet, for old friends we've just met. Part Heaven, part space, or have I found my place? You can just visit, but I plan to stay, I'm going to go back there some day." Gonzo, in the Muppet Movie

#42 plantime

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Posted 29 August 2006 - 11:08 AM

I have to agree with Jersey Angel. I can't hover/squat over something that I have to hitch a thigh over just to reach it. I understand that people in wheelchairs need the higher seat, but my short legs need something halfway between that and a child's potty! For public johns, those disinfectant wipes work fantastic!


I do love the picture, though!! :lol: :lol: :lol: :lol:
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Dessa

The Lord bless you and keep you; the Lord make His face shine upon you and be gracious to you." Numbers 6:24-25

#43 mouse

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Posted 29 August 2006 - 01:05 PM

Karen you are a "hoot" (sound like Lynne, don't I), for starting this thread.

I am a hoverer, but I use a piece of TP to pick up the sit lid before I hover.

Everyone should be more concerned about grocery cart handles and the bottom of their purses. I use the wipes in the grocery store and as soon as I get home, I wash my hands before I handle the fruits, etc. I also am usually using a purse that has a long strap and it is ALWAYS on my shoulder and never set down anyplace. If I do set it down, then I come home and wipe it down with a clorox wipe. There is more e-coli on the bottom of your purse then just about anywhere else. Most of us women, come in the kitchen and set our purses on the counter while we put the food away. A big mistake.
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"Throw yourself a pity-party and you'll be the only guest." - Earlene Fowler

Diag. Celiac Disease by positive blood test 2/03/2004
Allergies - corn, soy, casein, egg whites and wheat
Morphia Scleroderma
Osteoarthritis
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#44 snapple

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Posted 29 August 2006 - 06:11 PM

I am a hoverer; however my mother has a physical disability and has to sit on the public toilets. She says a little prayer every time she does, and so far, no weird dibilitating disease on her nether regions.

I do have a story for ya'll though. When I was in college I got stuck in a nasty snowstorm on the highway for 14 hours. There were no bathrooms and I had unfortunately drunk a super sized soda. I finally realized that I was going to pee whether I wanted to or not, but if I didn't do it on my own, I was gonna do it without my permission :unsure: . Sooo, I grabbed the big cup (the only liquid holder I had) and tried to manuver myself into a position that would work, while squatting in the passenger side of the car. I was sooo scared of missing the cup and peeing on myself, or worse, the car that I couldn't go. I ended up squatting over the cup in 2 feet of snow with the passenger front and rear doors open to shield me (it was still snowing and the wind was really blowing); with a big mac truck directly behind me. I am sure that the driver got a great scene and laugh, but I got relief! Three cup fulls!

Ever since then, I can squat anywhere!
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