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The Funny Pages - Tickle Me Elbow - The Original
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Apparently from keeping everything all bottled up inside him :P Hee!

Snort! :P

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PSILLS!! This one's gonna run & run - yooz know that dont yer? :lol:

''See, last night I decided to stick a vinegar bottle into my anus and it sorta got stuck....."

....am I the only one wondering if it contained Barley Malt?? :unsure::blink::lol:

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:huh:

Perhaps he was creating a small home puppet-show, with a fabricated marionette that he could move about...... ..... .

:lol:

OMG! LMAO! what a visual! :D

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PSILLS!! This one's gonna run & run - yooz know that dont yer? :lol:

....am I the only one wondering if it contained Barley Malt?? :unsure::blink::lol:

Per'aps due to his age he was attempting to pheel phull of piss and vinegar??? B)

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PSILLS!! This one's gonna run & run - yooz know that dont yer? :lol:

....am I the only one wondering if it contained Barley Malt?? :unsure::blink::lol:

Probably. That explains it then.

Not sure the excuse for the string guy who forgot the string. Brain fog?

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In other news....I'm making some hot rice "cereal" wif some leftover rice and yacking on the computer at the same time. A spoonphul of starchy milk just phlipped over in the pan sending it's contents all over the back of the stove.... <_<

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In other news....I'm making some hot rice "cereal" wif some leftover rice and yacking on the computer at the same time. A spoonphul of starchy milk just phlipped over in the pan sending it's contents all over the back of the stove.... <_<

At least it didn't get the computer.

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At least it didn't get the computer.

True dat!

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Perhaps the String-On-The-Penis Man was employing that old trick of tying string around one's finger to remember something very important, and was using his penis because.. . . .well. . . . ....because. ... ...he would notice it more?.. . ..:unsure:. . . . ... ..:lol:

Very phunny that he forgot he had tied the string there.. .. .. . ...I suppose he should have tied a string around one of his fingers, the good old-fashioned way, to help him remember that he had a string tied to his penis.

See? Women can solve everything. . . . . . ..

:lol:

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Very phunny that he forgot he had tied the string there.. .. .. . ...I suppose he should have tied a string around one of his fingers, the good old-fashioned way, to help him remember that he had a string tied to his penis.

...but what if he phorgot why he had string tied round his finger?? (much less his penis :unsure: )

...Perhaps a placard around his neck? :lol:

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...but what if he phorgot why he had string tied round his finger?? (much less his penis :unsure: )

...Perhaps a placard around his neck? :lol:

Even more perplexing...his girl friend forgot about it too. Days later when it was, well I think you can imagine, neither of them remembered. It wasn't obvious any longer because of the....um...infection.

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Even more perplexing...his girl friend forgot about it too. Days later when it was, well I think you can imagine, neither of them remembered. It wasn't obvious any longer because of the....um...infection.

Holy crap... . .. ....these characters sound like a veritable waste of skin. I'm thinkin' placard, as well.... . . .

:lol:

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Just had an amusing piece of speculative film going through me head... . ... .imagine if these two individuals were sitting beside one another in the emergency ward?

"Hey. . . ......what you in fer?"

"Hell, I got a bottle o' vinegar stuck up me arse. You?"

"Agh.. . . ..my penis is red, swollen, sore... . ...... .. I vaguely remember tying a string around it -- y'know, just fer fun - - and I think the damned thing's gotten infected!"

:lol:

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Just had an amusing piece of speculative film going through me head... . ... .imagine if these two individuals were sitting beside one another in the emergency ward?

"Hey. . . ......what you in fer?"

"Hell, I got a bottle o' vinegar stuck up me arse. You?"

"Agh.. . . ..my penis is red, swollen, sore... . ...... .. I vaguely remember tying a string around it -- y'know, just fer fun - - and I think the damned thing's gotten infected!"

:lol:

:lol: :lol: :lol:

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:lol: :lol: :lol:

You know what freaks me out about this story? Is that the guy was at the doctors office for some OTHER procedure and almost FORGOT to mention the BOTTLE IN HIS ANUS. I'm sorry, but that seems like a higher priority to me than say, an EEG, or getting a mole removed?

Can some one plus me? I feel so unplussed.... :(

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Can some one plus me? I feel so unplussed.... :(

You got it, Bun :D

And yeah--like the guy laid there through an EKG or a Echo and never thought to say anything? How uncomfortable it must have been to drive/ride to the hospital in the phirst place. So many questions.....

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You got it, Bun :D

And yeah--like the guy laid there through an EKG or a Echo and never thought to say anything? How uncomfortable it must have been to drive/ride to the hospital in the phirst place. So many questions.....

:wub:

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Holy crap... . .. ....these characters sound like a veritable waste of skin. I'm thinkin' placard, as well.... . . .

:lol:

I have always hoped they didn't make any babies. :)

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I just plussed myself into excellence. :ph34r: :ph34r:

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I just plussed myself into excellence. :ph34r: :ph34r:

I just plussed the whole page!

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I just plussed myself into excellence. :ph34r: :ph34r:

In all seriousness, what exactly is the plus button there for? Do we hit it when it is at the bottom of an excellent post? Life-altering, sage advice? Uplifting, poignant musings? Gads, no wonder I've been at zero forever. . . . ..... :rolleyes::lol:

I believe that the PLUS button should automatically activate when the word "penis" is typed.

Watch the scores ratchet up 'round here!!

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In all seriousness, what exactly is the plus button there for?

Dunno--one of the great mysteries of the board. I would think it's a way of grading posts, so to speak.

I never paid much attention to it until we started talking about it.

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I missed a lot today! I know a guy who's penis was getting really irritated, then swollen, inflammed and extremely painful and they couldn't figure out why. When he finally went to the dr they found a long piece of his wife's hair that had gotten wrapped around the shaft. It was almost impossible to see!!

Dh has a client who almost died last year while having sex. Got a little too rough-one slip and he broke his penis. When this happens, that massively engorged blood vessel pops sending blood flying ALL over the room. Most men don't survive this. Thank god his girlfriend was quick to call 911.....

I knew my bff would have a great story to rival mine since she's an ER charge nurse and sure enough, they had a guy recently with a vibrator stuck up there-TURNED ON! Of course everyone had to come in and listen to his heart, cuz you could hear it with the stethascope! He ended up going to surgery because everytime she thought she had a hold of it, it kept vibrating his way up the chute!

Btw, that vinegar bottle was about 6"!!!

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Yum! Glutino lemon wafers! (rapturous sigh).

Back to reality... I have seen some websites where you rate the posts positive or negative. I think this is just one of the features the web designer used on this site to bulk up his bill - along with the status bit. We rarely need to rate anyone negatively on this site. We usually take care of that in it other ways...

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Yum! Glutino lemon wafers! (rapturous sigh).

I love those--and the chocolate ones too!

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