Get email alerts Get Celiac.com E-mail Alerts  




Celiac.com Sponsor:
Celiac.com Sponsor:




Ads by Google:






   Get email alerts  Subscribe to FREE Celiac.com email alerts

Severe Depression
0

12 posts in this topic

I have been gluten-free for about 8 months now and I go in and out of severe depression. I really don't know which direction to turn anymore. I know people say that we should be thankful that this was caught early (I am 27) and that it isn't anything fatal but sometimes I can't seem to rationalize things that way. Noone else in my family has this and they really try to accomodate me but it is just so hard. I can't go out to eat with my friends, I can't order in dinner with my family, I can't participate when people at work throw parties, and I can't eat dinner at other people's houses without worrying about how things are cooked. Lately I have been feeling like it isn't worth living like this. That I would rather have not been diagnosed at all. I am more depressed now than I ever was. I do go out to Outback and sushi but that gets old. Before being diagnosed my favorite thing to do was go out to eat. Food made me happy. Now I can't do/eat any of the things I used too. I am really having a tough time dealing with this and I feel like I should be over this phase by now. Is anyone else dealing with this type of depression? I have even isolated myself from my friends at work since I can't go out to lunch with them so I miss out on everything. I go home to eat while they go out and it sucks. Any help/suggestions would be greatly appreciated. :(

0

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites


Ads by Google:

As for lunch at work, I either take my own stuff and tag along, or I settle for a big salad. I don't go out with the gang as much as I used to, but I do go. Do they have favorite places? If so, are they places you could go and talk to the manager ahead of time? If not, can you steer the co-workers to a friendly place?

I agree that big dinner parties at somebody else's house are almost impossible, but we have a couple of very close and trusted friends who are very understanding. I do eat at their houses. Both couples call me ahead to ask about ingredients and brands. The other option is for you to become host and fix a completely gluten-free dinner for friends. Don't try to foist gluten-free replacement food on them, just make dishes that are naturally gluten-free.

If the depression continues, get help from a professional.

richard

0

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

I felt the same way up intil about a year and a half after my diagnosis. Yes, it sucks-in today's society food is more than a means of nourishment-it's socialable and comforting. I have forced myself to realize that "it's only food" and that there are other things in life that bring me pleasure now....It's been tough---but once you physically start feeling better, it's easier to convince yourself of it.

I've heard excercise is one of the best things a celiac can do as well-I mountain bike almost every day and I swear it's the only thing that has kept me sane for the past two years. In the beginning, it was the only thing that could take my mind off of how crappy I was feeling or how much of a freak I felt like I was-and now that I'm feeling better and better every day, it's something that I know I'm good at, still relaxes me, helps me make new friends, and keeps me on my diet (you can't ride when you feel like crap!).

I honestly know how you feel-it took a serious butt-kicking from my boyfriend to get me out of my depression-and you have a supportive family as well (be thankful! Mine think I'm crazy still!). Find things you enjoy doing. There's more to life than food, or Celiac Disease.

Good luck!

Nadia

0

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

I agree that you might consider talking to a psych to help cope with this. Sometimes, there are situations that, for whatever reason, our current coping skills just aren't enough for, and that's when you talk to a professional about more appropriate coping skills. (You might handle a slightly leaky bathroom faucet on your own, but when the water starts spraying from the pipes, you call a plumber! :-) Same thing. And I say this as someone who is seeing a psychologist.)

As for the food issue... Food is a very important part in my life too, but I haven't had the same experience as you. I still go out, on occasion, with coworkers (I'm usually too busy or have lunch meetings, though!), I still eat at friends houses, and I still socialize with people around food. Often, I'll bring my own food, it's easier that way. I take a very self-confident approach to the "this isn't weird, it's just what I need to do, and if someone gives me a funny look, it's not because there's something wrong with me, it's because they don't understand, and that's their loss, not mine" attitude. It's not an in-your-face sort of thing, just a quiet "yep, that's what I do" sort of thing. Alternatively, I host. I enjoy cooking anyway, so I'll have people over and do the cooking. Sometimes friends bring things to help the process, but a bag of vegetables isn't going to be a contamination problem! ;-) Of course, everything I cook is gluten-free, but this really isn't a problem as gluten-free food is still perfectly normal food. (Oh, let me tell you... the chicken cacciatore I made earlier this week was _wonderful_!)

Don't be afraid to bring some lunch to work with you, and fill up on something while at work, then go out with your coworkers and just order a bowl of fruit, or steamed rice, or something VERY simple that you are confident of. (Don't forget about getting things like steamed shrimp and vegetables at a chinese restaurant - no sauce!)

I think part of it is practice. It IS very scary, at first, to get out there and continue socializing around food with this. You're trying to be so careful about everything and the situations are ones you can't control and it feels so overwhelming. But now that you've got the understanding of the diet down, you can - slowly - go out and use that and make educated decisions and get practice at eating in company. :-)

0

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

I think how your feeling is perfectly normal phase to go through.

I was so sick for a while I didn't care about the social impact on my life,I just wanted to get better. But now that I'm venturing out of the house again I'm running into the same issue.

I do feel seperate from others in social contexts where food is present but this is still pretty new to me and this is gonna take some time to get use to.

I'm going to a support group next week for the first time so I think that may help.

I think meeting people that know what your going through could be a very positive thing.

Is there a support group in your area?

And like the other said seek prof help if you continue to feel down.

Good Luck

Steve

0

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites




Thank you all so much for your replies. I definitely have my ups and downs, but knowing that I am not alone helps a lot. I live in the Philadelphia area and I do belong to the Celiac group around here but they only meet twice/year and it isn't something where everyone talks freely. I think a support group would help to be able to talk to people but I don't know of one like that around here. I do have a very loving and supporting group of friends and family so that is always good. Just sometimes I still feel very lonely. I will definitely seek professional help if this continues. Thanks again for your responses. Hopefully things can only get better. :)

0

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

Jaime--

I am going through the same thing. Everyone tells me that I can't be reclusive, eating in my apartment all the time, but I can't stand putting my health in other people's hands. You're right, it does suck.

Since you're a little older than I am (I'm 21), I think you're preparing your own food more often than me (I go to my college's cafeteria). My only advice is too keep looking around grocery stores--do you have a Wegman's in your area? I live in eastern PA, so I drive to Erie to get my gluten-free foods. Wegman's has a gluten-free aisle (with 'Gluten Free' in HUGE letters on the sign). I've just been trying to buy different foods so I don't get tired of the same thing, which has also been happening to me, too. I've never been a vegetable fan, so I'm getting tired of salads.

Have faith--there are plenty of people on this message board who are here to help.

I'm glad you've joined a support group--I don't have a car to reach the one nearest to me.

Take care,

0

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites
I am going through the same thing. Everyone tells me that I can't be reclusive, eating in my apartment all the time, but I can't stand putting my health in other people's hands. You're right, it does suck.

Jill, the people that are telling you that are probably the ones who are healthy and don't have to deal with celiac disease or anything like it. I feel very -- different and isolated and self-conscious in any situation with peers in which food is involved -- not so much at school where I have a gluten-free lunch of fish or chicken that's made for me and somewhat similar to the regular lunch, but I do feel really different and strange if I have to bring special food that is different and people wonder why..........this is rather longwinded, but I kinda understand the feeling of isolation.

At one point, I saw a psychologist, as well, and I guess it did a little for me, but not as much as I had hoped. I think that the continued symptoms are what cause my emotional sensitivity regarding celiac disease, etc....my apologies if i went off on a tangent....

0

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

celiac3270--

You're right. My boyfriend was the first person to tell me this, and I became very angry with him. He's very understanding, but the only concept he's not grasping is that cross-contamination IS serious--I can't just "let it go". He says it's impossible to prevent it from happening or to persuade EVERY restaurant owner to cook my food separately. I really don't know how to respond to that--if the restaurant can't cook the food correctly, I will choose a gluten-free restaurant.

The Food Services staff has improved their Celiac knowledge--one of them even checked out this site when she had the chance!!! If only everyone could be this open-minded. :D I now have my Food For Life gluten-free rice breads, Tinkyada pasta, Glutano pasta, and BBQ rice chips!!!! They've finally begun to understand--I'm just not that patient of a person, and health issues make it even more difficult.

Back to the original topic...I saw a pyschologist at the end of the school year last year. It was before I was diagnosed, so I was malnourished, vomiting, and had a chemical imbalance that made me depressed. It was a waste of time--not because he was a bad psychologist, I liked him, but I had no clue what to tell him---I kept pulling things out of the sky, so to speak--to this day he has no idea I have celiac disease.

Thanks for responding!!! Good luck w/the Endo!!!!

0

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

Hmm... so will I be a bad guy by saying - as one on the gluten-free (and CF!) diet myself, "you can't be a recluse"? Because I probably believe that as much as everyone of the non-gluten-free people who told you guys that.

Really, though, I think it comes back to that discussion we had on personalities a few months ago. There are some people who just - for whatever reasons - feel very very uncomfortable if they think they are different or standing out from a crowd. I get that way when I'm in a crowd that makes me feel insecure, or am having a bad day on self-confidence. (And I'm not trying to say "you don't have any self-confidence" - there are a lot of varying levels of self-confidence, and we can be very self-confident in lots of areas, and just lack self-confidence in one or two other areas.) There are some people who aren't able or willing to put up with skepticism (of any of a number of varying levels) from people when they tell them what they're eating. There are some people who just don't like to rock the boat. All sorts of things can play into it - and I think personality is a big factor.

I think familiarity plays a role too. Until you get a lot of practice at a lot of social situations that may involve food under your belt, it's just plain nerve-wracking not knowing what to expect. But then you've got to go through all that crap to get that experience. Double edge sword there. One thing that might help is being social in ways that don't emphasize food, even if they include it. For instance, going to a amusement park - you'll probably have lunch at some time, but you can bring your own food and eat it at the picnic tables with your friends (and won't have to wait in line - bonus!). But the majority of the day will be focused on things other than food. Same thing with pool parties, for example, where you can have chips and salsa (much of which is gluten-free and easy to tell a host a particular brand). Or hiking, where you bring your own food and usually eat on the trail anyway!

0

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

Tiffany--

You're not the bad guy. :D I understand what you are saying.

I have a question--can you convince a manager/cook to prepare your meal separately at a restaurant without gluten-free foods? How generous can they be? I know it's hard to answer definitively, but what has worked for you in the past?

Thanks,

0

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

Honestly, since leaving home for college, I really haven't eaten out much. My dad and I used to eat out - I kid you not - seven days a week. (Sometimes breakfast and dinner. It's how I ended up being a 150lb 5'2" 15 year old.) I may have just gotten burned out on it. Since I wasn't gluten-free at the time, that was never a concern.

These days, for restaurants... I find it varies so much, depending on the type of food served, the kitchen setup, the manager's personality, the waitperson's personality, the chef's personality, the time of day, even just how the day is going. I live in California - seemingly the home of wacky diets and a fairly common awareness of food sensitivities (even if they don't know the particulars) - so my experience may be skewed. You've just got to try to optomize your hand of cards - go when they aren't busy or have called ahead. Be patient with the staff to encourage them to be patient with you. Be accepting that they may have no friggin' idea what the heck you're talking about, and that you'll have to educate them. And don't be afraid to go over their heads - in a friendly fashion, of course. (That whole "you catch more flies with honey than vinegar" thing...)

I haven't tried too many restaurants, myself; like I said, I'm burnt out on them and prefer cooking at home - particularly quick meals. (Dinner last night: pan-fried porkchops (the leasing office at our apartment complex said 'no more barbequing', or they'd have been grilled), steamed broccoli, and grapes for dessert - took about 10 minutes to cook.) But I've tried a few places:

PF Changs - obviously nice and easy

Outback - obviously nice and easy, if you remind your waiter about the restrictions!

Buca Di Beppo - not too bad. I emailed them separately, and got a response about what could be made gluten-free for me (I had included contamination issues), and make intelligent decisions on the rest of it. italian antipasta (appetizers) are often very simple - they've got a roasted pepper, tomatoes, and mozerrella dish with garlic, olive oil, and pepper that's good, as well as a cucumber and tomato with red peppers salad that's tasty. restaurants like these, ones with this style of relatively simple cooking, often have simple, from scratch ingredients that you can work with, but talking to them when they're not busy, and you're not in a rush either, helps.

Great Wok - a little chinese place across the street from us. my husband loves it, so we were regulars before I was diagnosed. there's a bit of a language barrier there - at least I percieve one - so I found a chinese language food card, and used that to start a conversation one day when we went over there just as they were opening. it was tough, and there were a couple errors, and all I feel confident eating right now is the steamed shrimp with vegetables (not the chicken, I don't know if they use frozen chicken with broth glaze!), but it's the sort of thing that gets cooked in a steamer, separately from other items, and I feel fairly confident about it, and have had no reactions.

Barring a communication problem, it really comes down to the people you're dealing with. Are they nice, generous people? If so, they can probably find a way to accomodate you. But some people aren't nice and generous. And some people you have to approach with the right attitude to keep them nice and generous. ;-)

0

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

Create an account or sign in to comment

You need to be a member in order to leave a comment

Create an account

Sign up for a new account in our community. It's easy!


Register a new account

Sign in

Already have an account? Sign in here.


Sign In Now
0

  • Forum Statistics

    • Total Topics
      103,880
    • Total Posts
      919,460
  • Topics

  • Posts

    • Depression / anxiety issues
      i am wondering if those who get that initial "rush" of a day or twos relief of symptoms are "flying" on adrenaline?  wonder about adrenal fatigue?  not sure that is considered a real thing in western medicine... just a thought.  and you return of sym suggest a glutening.  Anything new in the diet?  even a new package of an already  checked product?  soap and shampoo need to be checked, or used very carefully.  is wife still eating gluten?  if so make sure sh is not bringing it to you.  kisses are nice, but make sure she brushes first, lol skipping products that are "made in shared buildings"  for at least a while. take the B12 on an empty stomache
    • Depression / anxiety issues
      Excellent. The chances are your body won't absorb some of this however so get as many good B sources in your diet as possible in addition. Get some sunshine as well, I know it does rain sometimes in Melbourne but believe me on that score you do a lot better than the poms.   Try and note these positive things, it's so easy when you're down to forget them. There will be more to come. Imagine yourself climbing a mountain. There are points at which you have to travel laterally or even down in order to follow the right path but your overall trajectory is upwards. You're actually lucky to have found it now at 28 with so much time ahead for healing and enjoying the fruits of it.  For me the gluten reaction is the initial cause of the depression but once that's removed it doesn't automatically lift like magic. Whilst the brain fog lifted soon on gluten-free diet, (there was a physical perceptible feeling in my head whilst I had that, a kind of thickness sort of like wearing a diving mask all the time that distances you from the world), the longer term depression isn't so easily shifted. I think this is because there are negative pathways that have been reinforced over many years. That's what living in a constant state of anxiety can do. It wrecks your self esteem which isn't magically repaired as your diet changes, sadly! As my physical symptoms lifted but I still felt depression, if on a different level, I realised I'd have to heal my mind as well as my gut. So I'm currently seeing a counsellor and it is helping. Not there yet though Yes I also get this and the mental side for me is also by far the worst side of it. I used to think I may die every time I got the chest pains but that wasn't as bad as feeling like shit 24/7 or having to fake a good time when feeling awful inside.  The single best thing about realising my gluten problem was that it explained that the underlying cause of that depression and anxiety was physical, not a defect of character, just some bad luck in the makeup of my gut and immune system. Hope that knowledge helps you also, when the anxiety strikes recognise it for what it is. A misdirected fight or flight response to an internal attack on your body.  Have a look at some cognitive behavioural therapy techniqes for challenging negative thoughts, that may be helpful? CBT has a very good success rate here in UK, better than anti depressants or talking therapy I think and it focuses on the practical,.  As you realise there's a load of bulls**t in society about how we view and discuss mental health. Don't buy into it. A lot of 'strong' people out there are simply bottling up their suffering through misguided pride. If people stigmatise you they're doing you the favour of letting you know they're not worth bothering with.  I got a lot of support on here when I was in your position and I'm sure you will too. I wish you the best of luck and I'm sure you'll be seeing more improvements in the weeks and months to come.      
    • Celiac - How many symptoms can there be?
      As you doubtless know now, there are so many ways celiac can present, here's as big a list as I could find online. It would probably be quicker to list what isn't a factor For me personally, nausua, check, left sided back hip pain (my laymans theory here is that celiac is affecting the sciatic nerve which runs from lower back down leg) , check, chest pain also - but for me this comes in short bursts more I guess like heartburn - I thought I was having heart attacks... Check to the rest too... And, for what its worth, other things like being prone to bronchial infection oh hell yes.  I'm currently in the glutened / affected by something group myself so I can only share the advice I've been given. Start a food diary and see if you can track down anything diet related that may be affecting you. Eat as clean as you can, ease up on alcohol, just try and give yourself the best chance of recovery. Have a google of 'heal my gut' diet tips too, you're in the recovery phase at the moment. All the best, at least there's comfort in knowing you're not alone!   Matt  
    • Depression / anxiety issues
      Thanks for the advice Matt, I will be sure to take it all onboard. It's really good to talk to others that have had similar experiences. I'm currently upping my b12 and also taking a additional (gluten free) multi and b complex, also omega 3s and Vitiam D3. I had been noticing small improvements that I forgot to mention in my previous post. I noticed that I fall asleep now much easier than before going gluten-free, I also have moments where my body feels more calm, then blood in my stool has stopped I haven't had any in 10 weeks. My mind was constantly fixated on negative thoughts for the past 2 years and they slowly began lifting from all day negative thoughts to maybe half a day of negative thoughts if that makes sense, but this pass week and a half they have come back, I'm also finding my self very nervous again around other people I'm hoping this will pass. The anxiety / depression is the worst symptom for me I would not wish it on my worst enemy, if that went away I would be the happiest man in the world. I found it very hard to talk to people about my mental health issues at work before I lost my job as I found some people stigmatise me and don't understand or really care, but I figure i don't need narrow minded people like that anyway, and as a man its hard to open up but my wife is very supportive and encouraging. Thanks again for the advice really apricate it
    • Depression / anxiety issues
      G'day Chris and welcome to the forum. You have found what I think is the single best resource on the web for advice, support and understanding for this condition. There is so much info here it's difficult to know where to start, but that's what this thread is for, please check it out. I think I got the recommendation for 'Real life with Celiac Disease' by Dennis and Leffler there, I'll second that, there's a lot of very useful info in there which helps to answer a lot of your questions. May be useful for your partner also. Chapters are short and informative so you can dip in and out.  There will doubtless be more advice to come from others with more experience but there's a few things which occur. Firstly, 10 weeks is very early days. Your body has been under an assault for many, many years. Your immune system has been working overtime and like so many others you've only reached diagnosis after reaching a crisis point. You are now healing but it won't be instant and it won't be without ups and downs, speedier and slower phases.  Second, being strict on gluten is essential, but it's only one part of the puzzle. You also need to eat really healthily and try to heal your gut. As you remove gluten you may find that your body starts telling you that other foods are also an issue. Don't panic, it doesn't mean that will always be the case. But you need to approach the next 6 months as a period where you're giving your body the easiest ride possible. That may mean taking probiotics, bone broths or it could also mean avoiding dairy or other foods, at least until your body has had a chance to heal. If you think you may still be getting gluteny effects keeping a food diary, noting what you eat, when and how you feel would help to track down any further issues.  I too battled through the anxiety, had an all too brief moment of bliss as the diet kicked in, then faced a bumpier recovery period in the weeks that followed. It gets easier but it's still difficult for me from time to time. I tried to articulate some of this recently here, it's a long read but maybe some of it will strike a chord. It will get better and you will become better equipped to deal with it. If you're like me you'll find other things getting better over time that you would never have thought to connect to gluten. Now, I've been exceedlingly nice here and not mentioned the England Rugby drubbing but I can feel my self control beginning to slip. So I'll leave it there   Matt
  • Upcoming Events

  • Blog Entries

  • Recent Status Updates

    • Jmg  »  admin

      Hello Admin!
      I don't know whether this is of interest to post on your articles feed:
      http://pratt.duke.edu/about/news/window-guts-brain
      Kind Regards,
      Matt
      · 2 replies
    • celiac sharon  »  cyclinglady

      Hello cycling lady, have you noticed my picture is showing up as you?  Have no idea why but it's rather disconcerting to see my picture and your words 😉  Do you know how to fix it?  You seem to have far more experience with this board than I do
      · 1 reply
    • Larry Gessner  »  cyclinglady

      Hi There, I don't know if there is a place for videos in the forum. I just watched "The Truth About Gluten" I think it is a good video. I would like to share it somewhere but don't know where it should go. Any help would be greatly appreciated.
      Here is the link if you have never watched it.
      https://youtu.be/IU6jVEwpjnE Thank You,
      Larry
      · 2 replies
  • Who's Online (See full list)

  • Member Statistics

    • Total Members
      60,926
    • Most Online
      1,763

    Newest Member
    tr2v12
    Joined