Get email alerts Get Celiac.com E-mail Alerts  




Celiac.com Sponsor:
Celiac.com Sponsor:




Ads by Google:






   Get email alerts  Subscribe to FREE Celiac.com email alerts

Dealing With Family
0

13 posts in this topic

I was diagnosed a little under a year ago and my mom still doesn't understand what celiac disease entails. She's always trying to get me to eat foods with "just a little bit" of flour in them, but I know that I shouldn't. She gets angry and says that it's no big deal, because smalls amounts have minimal effects. Lately I've been eating food with a little gluten when she insists just because it's easier.

How do I handle her? My dad just tells me to work it out, and I need to make her understand my situation.

0

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites


Ads by Google:

If you can't cook your own food, then you need to call your doctor and have him/her talk to your mom. You can NOT eat small amounts of gluten - you'll continue to damage your intestines and not heal.

If you can cook your own food, then you don't need to make her understand at all, you just need to stick to your guns and say no (and then cook your own food). Understanding on her part is not necessary, she just has to respect your decision, and you just have to have the backbone to stick with it.

0

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

I would print out some facts about celiac and the gluten free diet. About how it is required that you be 100% gluten free. Also print out the fabulously horrible things that can happen as a result if you are not 100% gluten-free. Such as diabetes, other autoimmune diseases, and my fav- stomach cancer. Have her read them. I hope that helps.

0

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

In addition to the other posters good advice:

You could help your mom find alternative gluten free flour to use in the meals with a little bit of flour. If you post the meal or receipe your mom wants to make on this site, there are plenty of people who can suggest a substitute flour.

With people who say "A little won't hurt" and are persistant about it, I only have to explain in graphic detail what a little gluten will do to me and they usually get the point.

You might also consider getting in contact with the nearest support group. Ask mom and dad to attend meetings with you.

0

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

Hey Hun, good luck with your mum.

The best way to get people to understand how bad gluten is for you is to compare it poison. That worked with my little sister, people understand the word 'poison ' better than 'cross-contamination'. Unfortunately we get just as sick off of cross-contamination as we do off of a whole loaf of bread so it's important for her to see that. Make sure you offer her facts, but if she's not interested in looking Celiacs' up and finding out information then you need to be prepared to fend for yourself.

Good Luck

Megs

0

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites




Bringing this back to the top so more suggestions can be added for this teenager.

0

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

Sorry you're going through this. For some reason this is a common reaction among family and friends. No idea why.

It sounds like you're still living at home. If I were you, I'd call the doctor's office myself and tell them that your mom doesn't seem to be taking it as seriously as she should. A lot of the time people think this is like diabetes where a small amount can usually be tolerated. She may also be having her own internal freak-out denial thing because finding out that your child has a serious illness can be terrifying. Either way, she needs to do what is necessary for your health.

If she needs some convincing, here are a couple informational brochures from a couple of the celiac organizations.

From www.celiac.org -

http://www.celiac.org/downloads/Quick%20St...NAL%2010_06.pdf

From www.csaceliacs.org -

http://www.csaceliacs.org/celiac_treatment.php

Hope that helps.

Nancy

0

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

Thanks so much for all of your advice.

I'm trying to make my mom understand, and I'll certainly use some, if not all, of the suggestions here. I don't think my mom's in denial. At least I hope not. She just doesn't seem to think of the consequences or fully comprehend the extent of her actions. Sometimes all it takes is to remind her of the pain that I used to go through, or of the results that could happen if we're not careful. I haven't had gluten in 4 months, though, and I think I'm on the road to recovery.

Oh, and yes I still live at home because I'm only 15.

Thanks again everyone for the help. :)

0

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

ya, my mom for like the first two years was always doing things like that, but luckily my dad is celiac so theres always food to eat that gluten-free, so After a while my mom gave up. just tick to it, be strong!!! she'll probably stop after a bit. but don't go hungry. :blink:

0

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

Let her know also that this message board is here for her too. We have a friends and family section where she can come to get support as well. It can be mind-boggling to go through when you are the one who is getting all the symptoms, much less when you have no way to know how it feels.

I had been gluten-free for about six months when my kids went gluten free, and I was surprised how hard it was for me. I was so sad for some reason. Even though I'm so upbeat when it comes to being gluten-free in my own life. When it was my kids, it just kicked me flat.

If my kids had been diagnosed with this and I wasn't, I probably would still not really have half a clue of what they were going through, and how little of a sacrifice being gluten free is when compared to how I feel when I eat gluten.

However your mom decides to deal with this, we're here for you. Even us old people. ;)

:D

Nancy

0

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

I have just found this forum , I live in the UK, and my 13 year old daughter has recently been diagnosed about 5 weeks ago.

I just wanted to say i feel so sad for you not having your mums support, and i hope your mum can come to terms with your diet.

I have been completly invovled in changing Sara's diet, right down to the fact that I never went in the kitchen and if i did it was to cook convience foods or dish out the take aways, all that has gone now and i can't beleive myself sometimes, that i have taken up cooking with a passion.

talking about family, the other members of my family her brother James who is 18, her sister Hollie is 15 and her dad, are not really getting into the spirit of things.

They still insist on getting takeways etc, infact her sister and brother where teasing her with a meal she always loved to eat, I had cooked for her and she was happy with what she had, and i had cooked pork char sui and rice. (we use soy sauce and yellow bean sauce) and they started to tease her with it . dad dosen't tease her(if he did he'd know about it) but he will still eat stuff in front of her

I had gone out and found out about this afterwards.

but I am really impressed though with how she is coping with things and her sheer deteminination when there is something screaminmg at her to eat it is amazing , there is stuff she likes to eat and can't have, but we are being mega positive and weighing the good up against the bad, (and cooking together) that has been fun, i need to prepare her for when she leaves home so needs to know what she can cook that is good for her

0

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

I completely understand! My mom is usually pretty good, but when I don't want to eat something because of doubt that it has gluten in it, she starts yelling at me for overreacting! :blink: It's not our fault that we don't want to get sick!

0

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites
I completely understand! My mom is usually pretty good, but when I don't want to eat something because of doubt that it has gluten in it, she starts yelling at me for overreacting! :blink: It's not our fault that we don't want to get sick!

never had this problem with my mom... infact totaly the opposite, she's really supportive and so are the rest of my family. its my freinds that are the problem for me.

As for getting your mom to understand, print out facts, get her to look here and/or call your dr and get him to talk to her, she needs to understand that she is going to make you seriously ill if she carries on the way she is.

dollshousegirl : im 15 and i live in the UK too, my fave brands are Juvela (www.juvela.co.uk) and glutafin (www.glutafin.co.uk), i also like DS (dietary specials) and trufree. Good stores are Asda, tesco and sainsbury's ..M&S have a good range but are expensive. The co-op (http://www.co-operative.coop/) are also ok. Oh yea... dont get DS spagetti.. it tastes like dish water! Hope that helps. Let me know if you want any more tips. Also, if you want i'll give you my msn and myspace so sarah can chat if she wants to.

0

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

Create an account or sign in to comment

You need to be a member in order to leave a comment

Create an account

Sign up for a new account in our community. It's easy!


Register a new account

Sign in

Already have an account? Sign in here.


Sign In Now
0

  • Forum Statistics

    • Total Topics
      104,695
    • Total Posts
      921,779
  • Topics

  • Posts

    • Advil (ibuprofen) is gluten-free, but can be a stomach irritant, especially if taken on an empty stomach. That said, I will also place my bet on the garlic and onions. As Raven said, eating more than once a day may also help. An empty stomach is likely to be an irritable stomach.
    • Another link: http://naldc.nal.usda.gov/download/7351/PDF
    • Thanks for posting.  I know it is difficult to talk about these sorts of things even on a webforum.  It is good thing for people to be aware though about celiac disease and that it can cause mental problems.  Gluten can cause brain damage and it can cause anxiety. If the brain does heal it may take a long time. I know that gluten can cause anxiety and obsessive thoughts.  My experience has been similar to your experience. When I first quit eating gluten I had a similar constant loop and strong negative feelings. There are lots of people on this forum who get anxiety when they eat gluten. Some people also experience gluten withdrawl where they experience anxiety after giving up gluten. It can take a long time for the body to heal and for obsessive thoughts to go away.
       It is normal for people to socialize with each other and to be comfortable about it. You said you have problems still socializing and being around people. It might be a depressing thought but it sounds to me like you still have problems with anxiety.  I would recommend considering what options you have available to treat the anxiety. When I quit eating Gluten I still had some symptoms, even though I felt much better. I have been slowly recovering over a period of about three years. I had obsessive thoughts even after I quit eating gluten.  Now I very rarely if at all think about those things. My experience is that my mind would latch on to certain things that caused me anxiety and focus on those things. Sometimes my focus would shift and I would latch onto other things. My ability to socialize has also improved greatly with time. I have made some dietary changes which I believe have helped greatly. It sounds to me like you have obsessive thoughts about things and maybe some brain damage. My experience has been that my obsessive thoughts about different things went away with time. I feel my obsessive thoughts were caused by gluten and not by what people did around me or any events. As my brain healed I became more self aware and things became less stressful.  I can't give medical advice on this forum but I can talk about my current diet and my experience with celiac disease. My experience with gluten is different from a lot of other people so it is a good idea to ask other people and to talk to a doctor.  I avoid oats and avoid almost all processed foods. I buy certified gluten free food. I eat healthy and I exercise every day. I take st John's Wort as I have read studies that say it may be as effective as some other anti-depressants for treating certain types of anxiety. It is available over the counter. I started with a small dosage and then stepped it up over time. I think it helps a lot.  This is also something that you should talk to a doctor about first. https://www.researchgate.net/profile/Martin_Mahoney2/publication/7426926_St._John's_wort/links/540d8acc0cf2f2b29a386673.pdf A lot of people with celiac disease have vitamin deficiencies.  Vitamin b deficiency can cause anxiety. Some people do not process the synthetic form of vitamin b (from normal pills)  very well, and do better on an activated form of vitamin b. I take:
      1 activated vitamin b12 daily
      1 activated vitamin b6 every once in a while. 1 regular vitamin b multivitamin
      1 magnesium pill every day.
      St Johns Wort daily.
      1 zinc vitamin daily
      I drink lots of Chamomile tea and decaf coffee. I avoid most caffeine. 
      I think each of these helps lower my anxiety level.  I eat fruit with every meal. Canned fruit from walmart is cheap and good for you. I eat salad and and vegetables and avoid dairy.  I eat frozen fish often as it has healthy proteins. Eating healthy is very important. I eat potatoes and rice. http://www.livestrong.com/article/454179-what-is-methyl-b12/ I avoid eating soy sauce, soy, cheese, aged meats and fermented foods (I do drink certain types of alcohol in moderate amounts.) These foods contain lots of Tyramine. I might (or might not) have "monoaine oxidase deficiency" and if so high Tyramine foods should be avoided.  I thought I might have problems with elevated ammonia in my blood, but I am not convinced of that anymore. I limited my consumption of meat for a while as well as dairy but I am not sure if i helped.  I have heard that Celiac disease can effect other organs besides the brain and those organs can have an effect on the brain.  My current diet is working so I am going to stick with it for now. I try not to worry about things that are outside of my control. Be patient as it took me a long time to recover.  Let me know if you have any questions. There is a lot of information on this site and people who are willing to help.
       
    • Thank you. This is really helpful. I will call around next week.  I just want to heal! 
    • My endoscopy showed i had decreased folds in my duodenum. The biopsy came back and showed that my villi were fine... i have been on a gluten free diet for 6 years because i was just told i was intolerant but never had any testing before. when i eat gluten i get sick for 2 weeks. i came down with issues of other foods in march so they were trying to figure out why and wanted to know if i had celiac are not because that would explain why dairy and fructose are a problem.. both intolerant test for both were negative but the fructose test made me extremely sick but it was negative...      Im trying to figure out why i have decreased  folds in the first place. my Gi doctor is stumped on that to why the endoscopy would show damage but the under the microscope are fine. She is going to call the dr who did my scope and then is supposed to get back to  me..    would being gluten free for 6 year make it so there was damage and then my vili are now fine but still cant be seen in the endoscope?
  • Upcoming Events

  • Blog Entries

  • Recent Status Updates

  • Who's Online (See full list)

  • Member Statistics

    • Total Members
      61,701
    • Most Online
      3,093

    Newest Member
    Dtroutmann
    Joined