[Juliebove]

My daughter has additional food allergies, so I am always looking for things she can eat that are on sale so I can stock up. I also have to mail order a lot of her food and to save on postage, I stock up there too.

Seems I always have a lot of old, bad food! We keep most of her food separate in some bins an on a shelving unit. Part of my problem is making her be responsible for keeping things neat and organized. She's 11 now and I feel she should be able to do this. But apparently not.

Another problem is that she'll see something at the store and tell me she needs it. She is out of it. So I buy it. Well, seeing as how I just threw out 6 boxes of Rice Chex, most opened and partially eaten, but one full one, another box of Corn Chex, and several unopened boxes of Koala Crisp, I know I can't trust her on that one!

Still another problem is people giving her candy. This is happening a lot less now that she is older, but it still happens. She collects the candy. Doesn't eat it.

I have made a few changes that I hope will help. I am trying to not mail order things unless I have to. My local health food store is good to order things for me when they can. Alas, nobody can seem to get the Ener-G Rice Starch bread so I have to order that.

I am telling people not to give her candy unless she is going to eat it right then and there. She can not take it home.

I am going to make more of an effort to see what we might need before I buy it and not just buy something because it is on sale.

Another problem is that her allergies changed. She is no longer allergic to some things that she used to be and some new ones developed.

I could have sworn that we went through the food at back to school time last year, again around Christmas when we were snowed in and had nothing better to do. And again in the spring! But no! There was old Halloween, Easter and Valentines candy. No Christmas candy simply because I bought her very little, seeing as how she had so much else. But we found stuff in there that expired in 08!

I must say that the shelf looks a LOT neater. But we have so much food to throw out, it probably won't fit in our trash cans this week. And it's not the first time we've done this. We usually have two black garbage bags full of old food that we have to get rid of.

I also think part of my problem is my upbringing. Although my parents didn't and don't buy a lot of food at once (except for some cases of things at Costco), they do seem to keep a huge stash of other things. Like laundry soap, plastic bags, paper goods, etc. This all seemed to start back in the 70's when my dad said there was a paper shortage. He feared he would run out of toilet paper. That never happened and I don't really know if there was a shortage or not.

I seem to do okay with food for myself. I need special food as well, but I can get most of my food at the regular stores. I always keep a little extra, and I just figure if I run out of something like bread, I can just have some crackers or pretzels or something.

But with my daughter... I guess I fear that I will run out of something and she won't have what she wants to eat. And what she wants to eat is constantly changing. She'll eat one cereal for a while, then never want to eat it again.

Anyway... Does anyone else have this problem of buying too much and then having to throw it out? I know it will happen sometimes. But I want to not let it get this out of control again. It's a waste of money and time!

[RideAllWays]

My dad does this ALL THE TIME. I hate going grocery shopping with him because he buys tons of stuff we don't need, and nothing I say can stop him from buying things. I know it's not the same situation, but it is similar in the way that we have too much food that ends up getting thrown out. Then he groans about it not being eaten..sometimes he complains to me.."Why hasn't this bread been eaten? Why is this cheese moldy?" Ummmm Dad I cant eat that stuff!!!

I also understand the changing allergies. I used to be fine with corn and soy, but now I am not. A whole bunch of my gluten-free products now either have to be eaten by the rest of my family or thrown out. Quite annoying.

Try freezing the things you mail order, and everything you buy at a grocery store, if it is perishable, try not to buy in bulk.

[ravenwoodglass]

"Part of my problem is making her be responsible for keeping things neat and organized. She's 11 now and I feel she should be able to do this. But apparently not"

She is most likely too young to be fully responsible for this. I was in the restaurant business for years and trying to teach people how to rotate stock and properly form an order was not as easy as it sounds even for adults. I would suggest doing this with her for a bit. Pull everything out with her and organize the area. Get a bin or two if needed to help with the organization. Put like things together and make sure stuff that will expire first is in the front and use those items first. When it is time to go grocery shopping first go through the cabinet and write down the items that are needed, when you get home put the new items at the back so the old stuff gets used first. Items that she used to be able to eat but can't any longer should be put if unopened into a bin for donation or into the general family shelves. It sounds like she also may be prone to hoarding (the candy) this isn't something that would be unusual for someone who is on a restricted diet. Make sure she knows that if something runs out it will be replaced. Helping her make shopping lists may also help with this. Try to keep things as pleasant as you can and praise her when she does things the way she should so she enjoys what you are doing and eventually she will be able to handle it on her own. It may take awhile but one day you may be getting ready to shop and she may surprise you by coming up with a doable list on her own.

[Juliebove]

RideAllWays, on Aug 21 2009, 11:34 PM, said:

My dad does this ALL THE TIME. I hate going grocery shopping with him because he buys tons of stuff we don't need, and nothing I say can stop him from buying things. I know it's not the same situation, but it is similar in the way that we have too much food that ends up getting thrown out. Then he groans about it not being eaten..sometimes he complains to me.."Why hasn't this bread been eaten? Why is this cheese moldy?" Ummmm Dad I cant eat that stuff!!!

I also understand the changing allergies. I used to be fine with corn and soy, but now I am not. A whole bunch of my gluten-free products now either have to be eaten by the rest of my family or thrown out. Quite annoying.

Try freezing the things you mail order, and everything you buy at a grocery store, if it is perishable, try not to buy in bulk.

No room in the freezer so I can't do that. I don't usually buy in bulk at the grocery store, but I was doing it with cereal I guess. Especially if it was hard to find or on sale.

[Juliebove]

ravenwoodglass, on Aug 22 2009, 07:29 AM, said:

"Part of my problem is making her be responsible for keeping things neat and organized. She's 11 now and I feel she should be able to do this. But apparently not"

She is most likely too young to be fully responsible for this. I was in the restaurant business for years and trying to teach people how to rotate stock and properly form an order was not as easy as it sounds even for adults. I would suggest doing this with her for a bit. Pull everything out with her and organize the area. Get a bin or two if needed to help with the organization. Put like things together and make sure stuff that will expire first is in the front and use those items first. When it is time to go grocery shopping first go through the cabinet and write down the items that are needed, when you get home put the new items at the back so the old stuff gets used first. Items that she used to be able to eat but can't any longer should be put if unopened into a bin for donation or into the general family shelves. It sounds like she also may be prone to hoarding (the candy) this isn't something that would be unusual for someone who is on a restricted diet. Make sure she knows that if something runs out it will be replaced. Helping her make shopping lists may also help with this. Try to keep things as pleasant as you can and praise her when she does things the way she should so she enjoys what you are doing and eventually she will be able to handle it on her own. It may take awhile but one day you may be getting ready to shop and she may surprise you by coming up with a doable list on her own.

She knows how to rotate, but just doesn't do it. She does not seem to understand that all foods of a certain kind need to go together. She does a similar thing with her toys. I bought her all these bins to help organize, yet she always wants to put things loose on the shelf in random order. Drives me nuts!

I also do think she's a hoarder. I noticed this when she was young. We didn't know of her food allergies then, but I did have her on a restricted diet because she was a little overweight. She had a basket of approved snacks that she could go to at any time. I found find things from the basket hidden all over the house.

She was also taking my things. All sorts of little things had disappeared. One days when mom was visiting, she opened a cookie jar that looked liike a cow. The head mooed when you lifted it. It had been a gift. We didn't eat cookies, so I gave it do her to play with. There were all of my things inside the cookie jar. She said it was her collection!

[ravenwoodglass]

Juliebove, on Aug 22 2009, 12:45 PM, said:

She knows how to rotate, but just doesn't do it. She does not seem to understand that all foods of a certain kind need to go together. She does a similar thing with her toys. I bought her all these bins to help organize, yet she always wants to put things loose on the shelf in random order. Drives me nuts!

I also do think she's a hoarder. I noticed this when she was young. We didn't know of her food allergies then, but I did have her on a restricted diet because she was a little overweight. She had a basket of approved snacks that she could go to at any time. I found find things from the basket hidden all over the house.

She was also taking my things. All sorts of little things had disappeared. One days when mom was visiting, she opened a cookie jar that looked liike a cow. The head mooed when you lifted it. It had been a gift. We didn't eat cookies, so I gave it do her to play with. There were all of my things inside the cookie jar. She said it was her collection!

She may just be one of those kids that we often have that are complete opposites from us. I have two of them. I drove them crazy with my disorganization when they were younger and I do love my knicknacks. They are all over the place. The kids, now young adults have apartments that I consider stark. If her disorganization seems to be an issue, especially with the hoarding aspect of it, it might be helpful to have a few visits with a psychologist to see if there are reasons behind it and to possibly help aleviate the problem. Sometimes a 'disinterested' person can accomplish more than we can as parents. After all most kids think we know nothing, at least until they grow up and have little ones of their own. .

[Juliebove]

ravenwoodglass, on Aug 22 2009, 07:54 PM, said:

She may just be one of those kids that we often have that are complete opposites from us. I have two of them. I drove them crazy with my disorganization when they were younger and I do love my knicknacks. They are all over the place. The kids, now young adults have apartments that I consider stark. If her disorganization seems to be an issue, especially with the hoarding aspect of it, it might be helpful to have a few visits with a psychologist to see if there are reasons behind it and to possibly help aleviate the problem. Sometimes a 'disinterested' person can accomplish more than we can as parents. After all most kids think we know nothing, at least until they grow up and have little ones of their own. .

I'm pretty sure I know what is causing it. We had a traumatic incident when she was about 3. I don't really want to get into it here though.

[ravenwoodglass]

Juliebove, on Aug 22 2009, 07:12 PM, said:

I'm pretty sure I know what is causing it. We had a traumatic incident when she was about 3. I don't really want to get into it here though.

I'm sorry that she is still suffering. My hoarding was brought on by suddenly losing everything I owned and being homeless and starving a couple times in my young adult life. For me therapy has been quite helpful. If the trauma occured when she was so young she may not remember it but the effects of severe trauma can be longlasting. A councelor has been quite helpful for me in realizing this and overcoming it. Perhaps it might be helpful for her also.

[Juliebove]

ravenwoodglass, on Aug 23 2009, 07:24 AM, said:

I'm sorry that she is still suffering. My hoarding was brought on by suddenly losing everything I owned and being homeless and starving a couple times in my young adult life. For me therapy has been quite helpful. If the trauma occured when she was so young she may not remember it but the effects of severe trauma can be longlasting. A councelor has been quite helpful for me in realizing this and overcoming it. Perhaps it might be helpful for her also.

Thanks!