[AKcollegestudent]

A friend offered to take me home to New York with him for Thanksgiving, and end of the semester insanity aside, this seemed all right. But I've been reconsidering based not only upon a ridiculous amount of work, but also on the fact that I'm going to be away from my kitchen and the dining halls that I've finally got trained in someone else's home for almost a week.

I want to think it's ridiculous be concerned, and that I'm being paranoid, but I've never trusted my food source completely on someone else before. I'm sensitive enough to CC that it's been a problem before, plus my friend isn't one of the ones who gets how serious avoiding gluten, soy, and dairy actually is for me. And it's his mother who will be controlling the kitchen.

Should I make my apologies, and just make Thanksgiving dinner for me and a couple other on-campus folk? Or am I being ridiculously paranoid and there's a way to manage the 6 days, including Thanksgiving?

[Ahorsesoul]

I do hate to say this because I know going with your friend is so important. But if you are going to be afraid of getting poisoned the whole time you are there you will not enjoy yourself? And would the recover time be worth it?

You have to decide if it's worth being sick should you go with your friend.

IMO, I think it's too hard to expect a restricted diet at someone else's house for the Holidays. I'd say stay home, make a dinner for some other people at school that are not going home. You might find you are their angel and keep them from being depressed.

[Mtndog]

My opinion is DO NOT LET CELIAC RULE YOUR LIFE!

If you would enjoy getting away and not be too overwhelmed with work when you get back, I say go!

Explain your needs to your friend and her family. That doesn't mean you have to trust them- you could go food shopping and prepare foods for yourself while you are there. If you can deal with it at school (which I would think would be very challenging- I teach college so I know how dining halls can be), you can deal with it at a friend's house.

Just make your needs known, find out what your options are for shopping and preparing and then go!

For the actual Thanksgiving dinner, you could always make a little cornish hen (a lot of us do that if we have to travel to the house of someone who doesn't get it) and something SO YUMMY for dessert that others will want to eat YOUR food!

[jerseyangel]

Mtndog, on Nov 17 2009, 12:44 PM, said:

My opinion is DO NOT LET CELIAC RULE YOUR LIFE!

If you would enjoy getting away and not be too overwhelmed with work when you get back, I say go!

Explain your needs to your friend and her family. That doesn't mean you have to trust them- you could go food shopping and prepare foods for yourself while you are there. If you can deal with it at school (which I would think would be very challenging- I teach college so I know how dining halls can be), you can deal with it at a friend's house.

Just make your needs known, find out what your options are for shopping and preparing and then go!

For the actual Thanksgiving dinner, you could always make a little cornish hen (a lot of us do that if we have to travel to the house of someone who doesn't get it) and something SO YUMMY for dessert that others will want to eat YOUR food!

Yes yes yes!!

It takes a little planning, I'll grant you, but why should you stay alone for the holiday?! I quoted Mtndog since I have the same advice--make your own safe meal for Thanksgiving dinner (doesn't have to be elaborate, but something that you love), and then go food shopping while there and ask that you can share the kitchen for the rest of your visit.

I'll bet you'll be surprised how well this can work I'm about to visit family in NJ--I plan to bring my own dinner for Thanksgiving (I'll cook this weekend and freeze), and I'll go grocery shopping on Friday to get anything else I need. I'm bringing my cutting board, salad spinner, pot holders and non-stick frying pan. (You probably won't need so much stuff--I'm staying for 2 weeks).

[AKcollegestudent]

Okay, my mistake--I thought I'd made this clear. I've traveled to other people's homes before who would let me use the kitchen; the problem is that his mother is apparently unwilling to cede control of the kitchen. That's where my worries come from more than anything because even though both she and her son swear that poisoning me is not their intention this Thanksgiving, I'm not all that trusting of people cooking for me.

Any suggestions for that kettle of fish, or is Ahorsesoul correct?

[momxyz]

AKcollegestudent, on Nov 17 2009, 02:22 PM, said:

Okay, my mistake--I thought I'd made this clear. I've traveled to other people's homes before who would let me use the kitchen; the problem is that his mother is apparently unwilling to cede control of the kitchen. That's where my worries come from more than anything because even though both she and her son swear that poisoning me is not their intention this Thanksgiving, I'm not all that trusting of people cooking for me.

Any suggestions for that kettle of fish, or is Ahorsesoul correct?

I guess I would start by talking with your friend. And explain how much you'd like to come, but also that cross contamination is very real and not a trivial thing at all. Maybe you could ask him about the possibility of you talking to his mom in advance, to explain and ask permission to cook your own things in her kitchen.

[jerseyangel]

AKcollegestudent, on Nov 17 2009, 02:22 PM, said:

Okay, my mistake--I thought I'd made this clear. I've traveled to other people's homes before who would let me use the kitchen; the problem is that his mother is apparently unwilling to cede control of the kitchen. That's where my worries come from more than anything because even though both she and her son swear that poisoning me is not their intention this Thanksgiving, I'm not all that trusting of people cooking for me.

Any suggestions for that kettle of fish, or is Ahorsesoul correct?

Ok, I get it now I guess if the mother is set against you sharing her kitchen it would be very difficult for you to stay safe from cross contamination--no matter how well intentioned they are. It's too bad she can't meet you halfway, but in the end it's her home.....

I see there are others who will be on-campus for the holiday. Making dinner for a few of them would be a safer option for you and could turn out to be a very nice day.

I'm just sorry the mom won't bend on this

[Mtndog]

I agree with Jerseyangel- if she isn't willing to let you do your thing, the I would say no, it's not worth it. That's sad- some people really don't think it's that serious when in reality, it could mess up the rest of your semester.

I'd try talking to your friend and explaining this and see how it goes. If you don't trust it, then I would stay and have Thanksgiving with your friends on campus too.