Jump to content
This site uses cookies. Continued use is acceptance of our Terms of Use and Privacy Policy. More Info... ×

  • Welcome to Celiac.com!

    You have found your celiac tribe! Join us and ask questions in our forum, share your story, and connect with others.



  • Celiac.com Sponsor (A1):

    Celiac.com Sponsor (A1-M):

  • Get Celiac.com Updates:
    Support Celiac.com!
    eNewsletter
    Donate

Too Much Time On My Hands...

chasbari

By chasbari
in Coping with Celiac Disease

Recommended Posts

chasbari Apprentice
chasbari
Posted

I have been rather entertained by the presence of two words that have appeared lately here. The first is "Glutard" the second being "Glutoid." These amusing little labels got my over-active imagination off and running. What are some other possibilites for labeling those celiac aliens...?

How about:

Gludiots (gluten+idiots) for those who are not only totally ignorant about what gluten is but also imperil those of us who really need to know.

Glutebots (Gluten+robot) for those who are chronically under the influence of gluten.. they have that glazed (donut) look in their eye and can't think for being in a chronic gluten induced brain fog.

Glurons (Gluten+moron) See Gludiots.. variant may have more common use in the south.. I can't be sure, though.

Glutebies (Gluten+zombies) See glutebots with the frightening distinction being they aer actively trying to spread gluten in all sorts of unseeming ways.. kind of like guys who don't wash after using the potty.

Glutots or glutites (Gluten+zealot or ite as in follower of) those who are constantly, through seriptitious or overt means, trying to get you to come back over to the other side..

Glutatives (Gluten+relative) these are the most dangerous as they are usually the most nightmarish combination of all of the above. Phasers need to be set on kill, not stun, around so many of them as they really are out to get us.

Glutistes (gluten+artiste) all those chefs and cooking show hosts who are constantly trying to make those poisonous glutens look too enticing.

Well, that's a start. Anybody else? I am sure I have missed many.

Link to comment
Share on other sites
Celiac.com Sponsor (A8):
Celiac.com Sponsor (A8):

Celiac.com Sponsor (A8-M):


jststric Contributor
jststric
Posted

Lmbo! Very good! Can't add ti your list at the moment but am sure to try using a few very soon!!

Link to comment
Share on other sites
kayo Explorer
kayo
Posted

Love it!!! <clapping>

Fauxliacs (faux + celiacs) Those who claim to be celiac too and tell you all about it while they munch on pizza, pretzels and beer.

Link to comment
Share on other sites
vbecton Explorer
vbecton
Posted

I love it! :D

Link to comment
Share on other sites
mushroom Proficient
mushroom
Posted

How about glunderminers or glusabs, for the folks who try to sneak gluten into you? Sabs as in saboteurs.

Link to comment
Share on other sites
Skylark Collaborator
Skylark
Posted

Funny! Got another.

Foodiot (food+idiot) Person who has no idea what is in their food. Believes flour grows on flour trees in 5 lb bags.

Fadliac (fad+celiac) Person eating gluten-free because it's trendy and cool. Fadliacs don't actually have any gluten-related health problems and can't figure out why you're so careful.

Link to comment
Share on other sites
chasbari Apprentice
chasbari
  • Author
Posted

I will be grinning all day long.. love them all so far!

Link to comment
Share on other sites
Celiac.com Sponsor (A8):
Celiac.com Sponsor (A8):

Celiac.com Sponsor (A8-M):


GlutenFreeManna Rising Star
GlutenFreeManna
Posted

I love this game. This is great!

Glupons-- (Gluten + Coupon) Coupons that can only be used for gluten-containing food. (So of course they are worthless to me. I do trade with my Gluponer friends though for Gluten free product coupons.) :D

Glumercials (Gluten + Commercials) Commercials on TV for Gluten food.

Link to comment
Share on other sites
Ahorsesoul Enthusiast
Ahorsesoul
Posted

Noah Webster just turned over in his grave. Several times. lol

Can I post some of these new words on my facebook page?

Link to comment
Share on other sites
curiousgirl Contributor
curiousgirl
Posted

Noah Webster just turned over in his grave. Several times. lol

Can I post some of these new words on my facebook page?

Too funny!

Link to comment
Share on other sites
ravenwoodglass Mentor
ravenwoodglass
Posted

Thanks for the laughs folks. You guys are great and very imaginative.

Link to comment
Share on other sites
chasbari Apprentice
chasbari
  • Author
Posted

Noah Webster just turned over in his grave. Several times. lol

Can I post some of these new words on my facebook page?

I'd be honored to be quoted in such a high minded way...(smirk) Use mine freely if you like.

Glumercials...I like that one especially.. Having to sit through shows watching all those glumercials drives me, well... glutatonic.

cs

Link to comment
Share on other sites
Aphreal Contributor
Aphreal
Posted

I too, have noticed the terms and they crack me up. I feel like I am one of the cool kids in the cool club because I can call some a glutard and they have no idea what I just said. :)

Link to comment
Share on other sites
Aphreal Contributor
Aphreal
Posted

My fav is Glupons. I am known as one of the local coupon ladies. Little good they do me now for most of what I can eat.

Gluturds who don't print glupons.

Link to comment
Share on other sites
scarlett77 Apprentice
scarlett77
Posted

LMAO...oh the Glupons kill me. I'm forever throwing away coupons because I can't use them. Oh and don't even get me started on commercials. I rue the day when my son will ask me to buy him something he saw on TV that he can't have.

And as far as Gludiots go, it absolutely amazes me how many people really don't know things like pasta, bread, cookies, and cake are made with wheat. I mean really I didn't think it was rocket science! And I'm not even Celiac...

Link to comment
Share on other sites
GlutenFreeManna Rising Star
GlutenFreeManna
Posted

My fav is Glupons. I am known as one of the local coupon ladies. Little good they do me now for most of what I can eat.

Gluturds who don't print glupons.

LMAO...oh the Glupons kill me. I'm forever throwing away coupons because I can't use them. Oh and don't even get me started on commercials. I rue the day when my son will ask me to buy him something he saw on TV that he can't have.

And as far as Gludiots go, it absolutely amazes me how many people really don't know things like pasta, bread, cookies, and cake are made with wheat. I mean really I didn't think it was rocket science! And I'm not even Celiac...

Glad to be a source of amusement. I sort my coupons now into glupons and Non-glupons and take the Glupons to my gluponing friends and they give me their non-glupons to use; So they don't go to waste and we both win. It is frustrating looking at my normal coupon boards and blogs though and see lots of people are all excited about a Glupon sale. This week it was Kelloggs. I don't think Kellogs makes a single safe cereal, so I didn't even bother looking at the threads, but lots of people were excited about Kelloggs. We need a name for companies that have nothing safe-- Glumpanies? No that doesn't sound quite right Glutenpanies? Glutenopolies? Yes, that's it Gluten + Monopoly = Glutenopoly. :P

Link to comment
Share on other sites
GlutenFreeManna Rising Star
GlutenFreeManna
Posted

My last post just made me think of another one:

Glutenopolis: (Gluten+ Metropolis) A metro area with lots of gluten restaurants and very few safe places to eat. Not to be confused with GlutenopoliEs. :lol:

Link to comment
Share on other sites
mushroom Proficient
mushroom
Posted

How about a Glu-sty for a place that is contaminated with gluten.

Link to comment
Share on other sites
chasbari Apprentice
chasbari
  • Author
Posted

Glad to be a source of amusement. I sort my coupons now into glupons and Non-glupons and take the Glupons to my gluponing friends and they give me their non-glupons to use; So they don't go to waste and we both win. It is frustrating looking at my normal coupon boards and blogs though and see lots of people are all excited about a Glupon sale. This week it was Kelloggs. I don't think Kellogs makes a single safe cereal, so I didn't even bother looking at the threads, but lots of people were excited about Kelloggs. We need a name for companies that have nothing safe-- Glumpanies? No that doesn't sound quite right Glutenpanies? Glutenopolies? Yes, that's it Gluten + Monopoly = Glutenopoly. :P

Whereas Glutenopolies is more descriptive and accurate I just love the sound of "glumpanies." It paints such a vivid picture in my mind... and makes me laugh as well. Go ahead.. say it out loud.. and if you are missing a tooth on your left side like I am because of celiac it sounds even funnier if you let your cheek flap whilst saying it...

Link to comment
Share on other sites
GlutenFreeManna Rising Star
GlutenFreeManna
Posted

Whereas Glutenopolies is more descriptive and accurate I just love the sound of "glumpanies." It paints such a vivid picture in my mind... and makes me laugh as well. Go ahead.. say it out loud.. and if you are missing a tooth on your left side like I am because of celiac it sounds even funnier if you let your cheek flap whilst saying it...

You're right. "Glumpanies" is fun to say. We can even create a tongue-twister: Those darn Glumpanies and their glutenopolies making it impossible to eat in the Glutenopolis! :lol:

Link to comment
Share on other sites
kayo Explorer
kayo
Posted

Do Glutaloompas work at the Glumpanies?

Link to comment
Share on other sites
chasbari Apprentice
chasbari
  • Author
Posted

Do Glutaloompas work at the Glumpanies?

Apparently not... if they did there would be more and better warnings about gluten everywhere and they would be sung to us in an amusingly moralizing tone.. Maybe the search would have to be for the golden gluten free ticket..

Link to comment
Share on other sites
Marz Enthusiast
Marz
Posted

Brilliant idea!

Glutnosis - the hypnotic trance that the tasty gluten-filled temptations put me into when I pass by the bakery section at the store

As an alternative for Glutatives - the senseless addition of gluten (as an "additive") to otherwise gluten-free food, just to ruin my day. See Kellog's Rice Krispies, sausages, Bar Ones etc...

Link to comment
Share on other sites
Marz Enthusiast
Marz
Posted

We need a name for companies that have nothing safe-- Glumpanies? No that doesn't sound quite right Glutenpanies? Glutenopolies? Yes, that's it Gluten + Monopoly = Glutenopoly. :P

lmao! Yes, Kellogs is definately a Glutenopoly!

Link to comment
Share on other sites
MissyJoy Rookie
MissyJoy
Posted

I so enjoyed reading these posts just now!!! I am glad I was alone - only my dog looked at me funny while I laughed out loud!!

:D

Link to comment
Share on other sites

Archived

This topic is now archived and is closed to further replies.

Go to topic listing
  • Celiac.com Sponsor (A19):


  • Member Statistics

    • Total Members
      121,033
    • Most Online (within 30 mins)
      7,748
    Rahma
    Newest Member
    Rahma
    Joined
  • Celiac.com Sponsor (A20):

  • Forum Statistics

    • Total Topics
      120.3k
    • Total Posts
      1m
  • Celiac.com Sponsor (A22):



  • Celiac.com Sponsor (A21):


  • Upcoming Events

  • Posts

    • trents
      Doc says I have celiac, despite no GI symptoms?

      By trents · Posted

      Bright blood in the stool would indicate bleeding down at the lower end in the colorectal area as opposed to the small bowel below the stomach where celiac manifests damage to the villous lining. Are these blood stools persistent? It's not unusual for this to happen once in a while to most anyone when a small surface vessel breaks, kind of like a nose bleed. As Scott Adams said, you must continue to consume regular amounts of gluten if the specialist will be doing additional testing for celiac disease, which could include an endoscopy with biopsy of the small bowel lining.
    • Bev in Milw
      Gluten-free bread

      By Bev in Milw · Posted

      Checkouts gluten-free recipes at twww.redstaryeast.com We tried a bread machine years ago and weren’t happy with results. Bread machines have pre-set rise & bake times.  Unfortunately, the program doesn’t adjust to slight differences when measuring, relative humidity or temperature of ingredients & in kitchens.  Lots of efforts for ONE odd- sized loaf that hard to cut into useable slices.  College-aged son found best use for bread machine was as heavy duty mixer that ‘kept dust in the box.’  He would pre-measure ingredients for 2-3 loaves & use machine mix up individual batches.      Since gluten-free bread needs  to rise only once, each recipe of dough went into a loaf pan. Pans sat counter to rise—time dependent of temp in kitchen. Then, baked in oven until he, not machine, decided it was done.     Took ~10 min extra up front to measure & mix additions but adds nothing to rise & bake times.     Loaves are great for slicing (Slice extra before freezing!). One mess to clean up, saves time & energy since you need to bake  as is half as often (If  you plan to bake lots more than bread, opt for KitchenAid/ heavy duty mixer instead.  Cover with dish towel to capture dust!)     Personally, I’m sure I had as a kid since I’ve never been a fan  of bread. .  Have been wrapping corn tortillas around things for 40+ years.  Can still get a dozen 12-pks of tortillas for same or less than price as 1 load of gluten-free bread. PLUS. the tortillas have more nutrients!         
    • CelestialScribe
      Seeking Gluten-Free Advice for My Trip to South Korea!

      By CelestialScribe · Posted

      Welcome to the forum. You are lucky because in Korean food, many classic meals such as bibimbap without sauce, barbecue meats and some kinds of soups generally do not have gluten. But it is a good idea to confirm with the restaurant workers for safety reasons. Regarding certain locations, I enjoy going to places such as Plant in Seoul and Sprout in Busan. Moreover, using applications like HappyCow or TripAdvisor can assist you to discover additional choices in the regions you plan to visit. One big tip: it is good to know some important Korean sentences, for example 'I cannot eat gluten' (geulluteuneul meogeul su eopseoyo)  or 'Does this have gluten?' (igeoe neun geulluteuni deureo innayo?) because they can be very helpful. If you are considering getting a local guide, I'd suggest this one https://gowithguide.com/korea They were very helpful when I needed to find places with gluten-free food options because they provide tours tailored to your preferences. Good luck with your travels! 🍻
    • RMJ
      Finding out I’m coeliac whilst pregnant

      By RMJ · Posted

      It is concerning.  Unfortunately a lot of doctors don’t know a lot about celiac disease, even some gastroenterologists.  Here is an article for you: Celiac disease and miscarriage I hope you have a successful pregnancy and a healthy baby!
    • Katiec123
      Finding out I’m coeliac whilst pregnant

      By Katiec123 · Posted

      @RMJ   this is really concerning and my GP has said none of this to me! 
×
×
  • Create New...