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Help With Peer Issues At School


sharps45

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sharps45 Apprentice

I'm 16 and a junior in high school. I've been diagnosed with celiac for 2 years, but I've never gone onto the gluten-free diet. But now I have stomach pains constantly, and my doctor has told me the diet would get rid of them. I can handle the diet when I'm home. My problem is school lunch. I don't want to stand out or have the lunch people make a special fuss over me. I'm the only celiac in my school. We live in a small town with a poor school district, so I'm afraid my gluten-free lunch from school would be hot dogs every day (I haven't really looked into it, though). I could go home for lunch, but then I lose out on the association with friends during that time.

Any suggestions?

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kareng Grand Master

Can't You bring a lunch? I don't know if you are a girl or boy but just a "I'm trying to eat healthier." explanation may be enough. My son took a lunch almost everyday of high school until this year as he can now come home. He just laughed and said he can't stand the school food. Many times his friends would try to eat his lunch as it was better than what they have. He still went thru the line to get a drink and candy bar. Your close friends probably know why.

Other excuses:

I have allergies.

I'm watching my weight ( doesn't work if you bring Fitos and candy)

I need more protein to bulk up.

The old standby excuse for my boys , My mom- won't spend the money on bad food, is on a health kick, my mom is making me go on a diet, or whatever else you can blame on a parent. That's what we're here for. :)

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sb2178 Enthusiast

Look into it. You may be surprised. Start with the school nurse, or call the district nutritionist. Get her contact info and send her the safe/not safe lists from this site. They are *required* to meet your needs. Variety is part of the recommendations, so things you can suggest other than hot dogs:

-hamburger patties

-soy sauce free chicken stir fry

-hard boiled eggs

-rice

-potatoes (plain)

-plain fruit and vegetables

-french fries may or may not be safe (lots of places bake them, but i don't what's on them)

So, say, fries, hamburger, baby carrots, and a milk. Not so weird. If the school is difficult, you may need to get a note from your doctor and have your parent(s) sign some paperwork.

You know how lots of people are lactose intolerant? Same thing. If you pretend it's no big deal, you'll be fine.... Or just offer to toss your cookies onto the lunch of whoever is giving you a hard time ;-) I always took my lunch and no one gave me a hard time. Even with my mom's weird bread! Admittedly, I took a peanut butter sandwich everyday from first grade through 11th, so I have patience with monotony. Unless I forgot my lunch.

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RiceGuy Collaborator

I agree that bringing a lunch is the best option. Do you have a favorite gluten-free bread? Homemade is generally best, and costs much less too.

If the cafeteria has a microwave oven, it might be worth asking for permission to use it. That could open up many options for you. A frozen meal will stay plenty cold enough until lunch time, when you could heat it up. Even if you buy prepackaged frozen meals, nobody would know they're gluten-free unless you brought them with the wrapper still on. There are microwaveable trays and containers with built-in dividers which could make it easier. It wouldn't require inventing an explanation if other students ask why. You could simply say you like what you bring better, which would of course be true, since they don't harm you.

I'm sure you already know this, but your true friends won't give you a hard time for taking care of yourself.

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Skylark Collaborator

I'm 16 and a junior in high school. I've been diagnosed with celiac for 2 years, but I've never gone onto the gluten-free diet. But now I have stomach pains constantly, and my doctor has told me the diet would get rid of them. I can handle the diet when I'm home. My problem is school lunch. I don't want to stand out or have the lunch people make a special fuss over me. I'm the only celiac in my school. We live in a small town with a poor school district, so I'm afraid my gluten-free lunch from school would be hot dogs every day (I haven't really looked into it, though). I could go home for lunch, but then I lose out on the association with friends during that time.

Any suggestions?

I'm going to give this to you straight. You are risking some very nasty health problems, including intestinal cancer, by not sticking to the diet. People with celiac who keep eating gluten can get organ damage, osteoporosis, nerve damage, thyroid disease, and other autoimmune diseases like lupus and sjogren's. Celiac is not something to play around with and you MUST follow the diet strictly. Yes, the diet will probably make the stomach pains go away and you'll also probably feel better overall.

If you don't want to go home, which makes total sense, you need to get up a little earlier and pack yourself lunch. I assume you're allowed to bring your lunch to school? I did that all the time in high school, mostly because I had to use my own money if I wanted to buy lunch in the school cafeteria. Nobody thought anything of it since bringing your lunch to school is pretty normal. Your friends really don't care what you eat, and if you don't make a big deal of it, they won't.

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sa1937 Community Regular

Can't You bring a lunch? I don't know if you are a girl or boy but just a "I'm trying to eat healthier." explanation may be enough. My son took a lunch almost everyday of high school until this year as he can now come home. He just laughed and said he can't stand the school food. Many times his friends would try to eat his lunch as it was better than what they have. He still went thru the line to get a drink and candy bar. Your close friends probably know why.

The old standby excuse for my boys , My mom- won't spend the money on bad food, is on a health kick, my mom is making me go on a diet, or whatever else you can blame on a parent. That's what we're here for. smile.gif

Did your Mom watch Jamie Oliver's Food Revolution? If so, a perfectly good reason to pack a lunch. It's really horrifying to see what school lunches consist of today. Back in the dark ages when I went to school, lunches were prepared in-house and didn't consist of the terrible already prepared food served today.

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missy'smom Collaborator

My son is feeling a little peer pressue this year being in 7th grade and in a school where all the cafeteria lunches are hot/corn dogs, pizza, burgers, sandwiches etc. very bready and veggies are not served much and not cool.

I make homemade chicken nuggets. Cut fresh chicken breast meat into strips or chunks and dip in gluten-free flour seasoned with salt and pepper, then in a beaten egg, then in gluten-free breadcrumbs. Then I lay them on a cookie sheet that has been lined with a piece of waxed paper and stick them in the freezer. When they are frozen. I put them in some kind of baggie or container. In the morning I take them straight from the freezer and deep fry them. They can be thawed and fried the night before. Just make sure that they cool down completely before putting them into the lunchbox or you will have problems with food safety and the coating will also not be as crisp. For the breadcrumbs, I put sliced of gluten-free bread in the food processor until I get nice crumbs, then put them into a ziplock and store in the freezer.

I send bunless hotdogs and bunless cheeseburger patties too that he eats with a fork. Sometimes for the hotdogs, I slice them into thick diagonal slices and sautee in a pan, then at the very end add a splash of BBQ sauce or catsup.

I bought mini/individual pizza pans on the internet and bake about 4 or 5 at a time and freeze them so kiddo can have pizza Friday sometimes like those who buy cafeteria lunch.

He has gotten lots of comments about his lunches in the past but nobody seems to mention the sandwiches or realize that they are different. His bread is a little brown but many people are switching to whole wheat these days so I don't think it stands out too much, although I'm not there.

Recently he tried something new-chicken salad-I used chunks of leftover roasted chicken, halved red grapes, parsley, you could add celery(DS doesn't like it)and mayo, honey and cider vinegar for the dressing. Simple, no bread, just ate it from the container and had some friut and cheese on the side.

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bbuster Explorer

My son is also 16 and a junior. He was diagnosed at age 10.

He brings his lunch every day. Most days he brings a ZonePerfect bar. (They have several gluten-free flavors, but not all - his favorite is double dark chocolate. You can get these at Wal-Mart or grocery stores) Then he adds things like fruit, veggies, chips, snack-pack pudding, store or homemade cookies.

Every Wednesday they have pizza at school, so on Tuesday nights, I make a big gluten-free pizza at home, and he takes the cold leftover pizza for lunch on Wednesdays.

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Mike7 Newbie

Seems like the common answer here is to bring a lunch and I agree. I brought lunches to high school even before I went on a gluten-free diet. This way you control what you eat and you can avoid the low grade nutrition from most HS cafeterias.

Also, about avoiding the gluten-free diet -- think of your body as a BMW. You want to feed it with the best fuels possible, healthy, protein packed, low-fat and fiber rich foods. Think of gluten as diesel fuel, something that will damage your luxury car aka, your body.

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Darn210 Enthusiast

The old standby excuse for my boys , My mom- won't spend the money on bad food, is on a health kick, my mom is making me go on a diet, or whatever else you can blame on a parent. That's what we're here for. :)

Here is a reason that I heard (can't remember where) and it had nothing to do with a gluten free diet . . .

"It's cheaper to bring lunch than buy it. Mom gives me half my normal lunch money if I bring my lunch from home." . . . tell them you're saving up for a car. If you've already got a car, then you're saving money for car insurance!!

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kareng Grand Master

Here is a reason that I heard (can't remember where) and it had nothing to do with a gluten free diet . . .

"It's cheaper to bring lunch than buy it. Mom gives me half my normal lunch money if I bring my lunch from home." . . . tell them you're saving up for a car. If you've already got a car, then you're saving money for car insurance!!

Perfect! My 17 yr old told me the other day that he blames lots of reasons for not doing something on me and he hopes if someone mentions it, I'll back him up with " we don't discuss family issues. ". :P

Saving money for a better stereo!

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GFinDC Veteran

You can also take Larabars. They are gluten free, soy free and dairy free. Lots of different flavors and available in many grocery stores. A Larabar, an apple, and a banana are a pretty nice lunch too.

Taking lunch is a good idea, they have lots of lunch boxes in stores to choose from for good reason. Besides the microwave, maybe check if you can use a school refrigerator to tuck you lunch in at the start of the day. Rice and veggies with chicken is an easy to take meal if you refrigerate it. Stir in some mayo, mustard and rice wine vinegar or lemon juice for added flavor. There are lots of versions of rice you can make, or use quinoa for variety. Chicken, beef, fried rice with pork, Hawaiian style with pineapple and coconut milk sauce, cinnamon, etc etc...

Ask your mom to check to the recipe section of this board for ideas, there are lots of them.

These threads might have some breakfast ideas that could be lunches.

Help With Breakfast Ideas eating

Quick Breakfast Ideas?

Dairy-free Breakfast Ideas? need hints!

Need Breakfast Ideas -- Gfcfsf

Breakfast Ideas

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Juliebove Rising Star

My daughter has several different food allergies so she has to bring her lunch. I'm not sure there would ever be an option for her at school! I have given her money in case she ever forgets her lunch. I just told her to eat the fruit or vegetables or whatever else looked safe. Luckily in her case the lunch is served at 10:30 so she isn't really hungry then.

She does bring her lunch. Usually just apples, carrots and maybe some meat. She tried a sandwich on the first day of school and just wasn't hungry enough to eat it. She has a friend who is diabetic so this girl must go to the nurse's office to do her insulin before she eats. She tried to buy lunch once but by the time she got through the line, there was no time to eat it. So now she brings her lunch too. Lots of kids bring their lunch.

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polarbearscooby Explorer

I'm in college but I live off campus, so I bring my lunch everyday... It's cheaper, safer, and tons of kids do it to save money

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  • 1 month later...
sharps45 Apprentice

I guess thanks for all the responses. To be truthful, I have to admit to myself that I don't want to commit to the diet. I guess I just want it to go away, or for science to solve the problem so I can take a pill or something! I get diarrhea often, but it's not incapacitating. I can't put on weight, but that's okay. I know there are possible future side effects, but I have to admit they don't really scare me just now.

I'm pretty much gluten-free now except for lunches and an occasional Wendys. I don't want to give those up.

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shopgirl Contributor

The possibility of osteoporosis, nerve damage, even cancer, doesn't scare you? I know high school is tough; I hated it. But the idea of being the slightest bit different in the eyes of your classmates is scarier to you than the damage you're doing to your body?

You don't even have to tell your classmates and friends if you don't want to. Buy some gluten-free bread and make yourself a sandwich. They'll never know the difference. Blame it, like someone else said, on your mom or your parents. I know my mother wouldn't mind the slightest if it made me stick to my diet.

Just because we don't see the outward effects of what gluten is doing to us, doesn't mean it's something we can just ignore. It's going to be harder because there are certain things you just can't eat but you do need to learn that you just can't eat them, even if the symptoms sometimes seem mild or manageable. You really need to find ways to start sticking to your diet. High school will be over in a few years but you're kind of stuck with this body for the long haul.

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tarnalberry Community Regular

Yeah, but I'm guessing you don't want cancer and to have to go through rounds of chemotherapy where you feel like crap and your hair falls out. I'm also guessing you don't want to develop autoimmune thyroid issues where you have no energy, can't lose weight, and have a host of other issues that go with it.

It can be hard to think long term, but really picture what it would be like to have the side effects/secondary issues. Maybe it means you can never have children (infertility is associated with untreated celiac), maybe it means you end up with weak bones and can't be active without repeated breaks, maybe you just feel crappy for a decade. Sure, it might be 10 years away, but there may be irreversible damage by then.

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sb2178 Enthusiast

And, before you get cancer, you'll be really anemic and lose most of your hair. You'll also probably develop weird looking fingernails. Then you'll have not much hair, funny fingernails, and you'll have to take iron supplements (which, quite honestly, SUCK).

REALLY.

You can get a baked potato and chili at Wendy's. Take your lunch or get your parents to chase down the school about school lunch.

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kareng Grand Master

Here's one reason to eat gluten-free.... Depending on the state you live in, your doctor should report your parents for child neglect/ abuse. The fact that they allow you to eat in a way that is causing you physical damage is child neglect/ abuse. This is because the only cure for your disease is a special diet. If you were diabetic and they wouldn't help you with your insulin, they would be in trouble. In some states 16 is considered too old for this. However, since you have a medical disability which may impair your judgement, the state may not consider you mentally competent ( this is a bit of a stretch as the mental issues associated with celiac disease are not widely recognized).

I used to work in a children's hospital and if you were coming to our clinic, our lawyer would probably advise the doctor that we will have to report your parents' non- compliance with treatment for a serious and chronic disease.

I realize that you are a teenager and it is hard to monitor every thing you are doing or eating. If you were my child and not following the diet, your freedom to choose anything more than which socks to wear, would be gone. If I had to eat lunch at school with you, I would. In fact, what school do you go to? When is lunch? I'll be there. Just joking but this is serious.

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DpBelle Newbie

I'm 16 and a junior and for almost a year I have been gluten free.

It's hard. I'm not going to pretend its not. When I see someone eating a sandwich, I nearly cry. I was diagnosed while doing my school musical. I was sick before, after, and during every rehearsal, not to mention every day of school and the final production. It was miserable, and since being gluten free my body has done a 180. I started packing this year, which is hard because I am the only celiac in the family, meaning my parents don't supply me with much, but I manage, and I have not gotten sick or missed or left school early because of it. Not one of my friends gives me a problem. Most people who I tell are just curious about it. I just explain to them that it would kill my intestines and could ultimately kill me with the other complications it entails.

I was not ever officailly diagnosed. It took months for them even to tell me I could be at risk for celiacs. You are so lucky that you have found out for certain what it is, and you should take advantage of that. You really have to make an effort in being gluten free. Your body is attacking itself. You are just make yourself sick. I cannot tell you how much my life has improved. I miss the fast food, the cakes and cookies. But knowing how much damage that would do to me helps me stay on track. You should be scared about what it will do to you. celiacs is something very serious.

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  • 3 months later...
Katah Newbie

Be3ing recently diagnosed, I know what it's like. The main thing is to think outside of the box. I have found that I love to take tuna salad, cheese, and some form of cracker (I also use blue corn chips). Also, leftovers are great. I use a thermos to keep food hot, like Camkpbell's soup. They offer gluten free soups. They have a list on their website. I also LOVE to bake. If you have some sort of muffin, bread, or something of that sort, you can add it to your lunch. I recently have gained a large appreciation for salad, that I never had before (I hated salad, now, not so much). Healthier options are usually more-likely to be gluten-free. Trust me, eating gluten free as a hig school student isn't a simple option, but it's pretty much the only one. I wouldn't risk your well-being. That's a whole lot of unneeded health risks. Don't take chances. It'll bite you in the butt before you know it. Going off gluten was like having a fog lifted from my eyes. Less tired, happier, more energetic, less sick (and a whole lot!), and I have a clearer mind. My appetite is small as it is, but out-of-the-box is the way to go.

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Dixiebell Contributor

Katah,

In the US, Campbell's soups are not gluten-free.

I don't want someone in the US to make a mistake and eat their soups. Here is a link to Campbell's US list.

Open Original Shared Link

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India Contributor

Like Skylark, I think we need to tell this to you straight. I know it's tough for you but "pretty much gluten-free now except for lunches and an occasional Wendy's" is not gluten-free. If you are still consuming gluten, you body is still having an immune response and damage can be happening that you don't know about yet. Future side effects aren't just possible, they're very likely and the future isn't as far away as it seems when you're 16. In my mid twenties, I thought I was going to be healthy for ever. I didn't have coeliac disease back then but I didn't take care of myself in other ways. I'm now in my early 30s and a bit of a physical wreck and I may be paying the price for the rest of my life. Please think seriously about your future and how poor health may limit all that life can offer.

Take care and good luck.

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cahill Collaborator

I guess thanks for all the responses. To be truthful, I have to admit to myself that I don't want to commit to the diet. I guess I just want it to go away, or for science to solve the problem so I can take a pill or something! I get diarrhea often, but it's not incapacitating. I can't put on weight, but that's okay. I know there are possible future side effects, but I have to admit they don't really scare me just now.

I'm pretty much gluten-free now except for lunches and an occasional Wendys. I don't want to give those up.

future side effects are not just possible they are inevitable unless you go totally gluten free. If the probability of cancer and other things already noted in this thread dont concern you ,goggle gluten ataxia.

Not fun and sometimes the damage is permanent.Or Leaky gut,that happens and you will be lucky to find anything you can eat that doesnt make you very ill.

I will be blunt ,You have a disease that is treatable with diet,take responsibly for your self and your body and deal with it.

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  • 1 month later...
brittanymaine Newbie

Seriously do NOT be embarassed with having to bring your own lunch. I realized in high school that you cannot worry about what others think of you. You have to think of yourself, and what is best for you. I used to care about what people said about me having celiac and why i would bring my own lunch when everyone else bought it, but one day I realized why should I care what they say to me?

In the long run you will be healthier than them anyways by bringing your own lunch

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