Get email alerts Get Celiac.com E-mail Alerts  




Celiac.com Sponsor:
Celiac.com Sponsor:




Ads by Google:






   Get email alerts  Subscribe to FREE Celiac.com email alerts

Eating At Relative's....
0

10 posts in this topic

This is my situation - we're invited at least once every 2 weeks or so to eat at my mom-in-laws or at my mom's house. Or I go visit my mom and she insists on giving us some left-overs for supper. They're trying really hard to not use anything containing gluten and asking lots of questions, and I'm also careful to double check spices and ask questions about anything I'm unsure about.

However... I can't exactly ask them to keep separate utensils, pots, spoons for making gluten-free foods. I'm also sensitive to soy, and I feel really bad telling my chef brother that I'd much rather have those prawns plain without the soy sauce and possibly gluten-containing coconut milk. How do I explain after telling them the problem is with gluten, that soy could be an issue too?

Oh, and don't even start with their cutting boards, or with non-stick pans. Both families are very big on bread, so assume bread crumbs anywhere.

I'm still trying to figure out what's safe for me or not, and I feel every time I eat out I run the risk of introducing some gluten, and then not knowing why I'm feeling ill.

Should I just tell them all no lunch/supper for a few months until I get it figured out? That we'll come to visit but won't eat? I'm worried I'll insult them, after all the trouble they've gone to already? Both families have even gone out and bought gluten-free bread/muffin mixes to bake (using their non-gluten-free pans of course...) I'm trying to toe the line between being careful (which they understand), and just sounding plain crazy/obsessive!

How do you guys handle families? :/

0

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites


Ads by Google:

They sound nice. So assuming they are reasonable- I would just tell them calmly that, because you are new to this gluten-free thing, you are still learning. You didn't know in the beginning all the stuff you are learning now. For a few months, you are not eating at anyones house but yours. You have found it's not as easy as you thought and that there can be other food issues. Invite them to your house. If they insist on bringing something they think is gluten-free, make enough food that no one will notice you don't eat theirs.

You can elaborate if they ask.

0

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

i agree. it sounds like they are trying to help you in anyway they can but don't fully understand how easy cc can be for you. we get together with our folks every other week specifically for supper and we have them come to our house. i cook, they bring something (since that makes them feel like they are contributing) but i KNOW what exactly is in my food.

i said something along these lines - "i know i sound high maintenance and overboard but after researching how to treat myself i have to be extreme or i will never fully get better and since i know y'all love me and want that for me i hope you will try to be understanding."

best wishes! and remember cc is just as bad as eating a bite or plate of gluten!!! :)

0

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

Honestly, I bought a couple of pots for my parents' house and as soon as I get a chance I'm getting them some glass containers for my leftovers and some plastic spoons that I'll mark gluten-free somehow. That way I don't feel bad about asking them to use my specific tools.

0

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

Honestly, I bought a couple of pots for my parents' house and as soon as I get a chance I'm getting them some glass containers for my leftovers and some plastic spoons that I'll mark gluten-free somehow. That way I don't feel bad about asking them to use my specific tools.

You can get utensils and containers in red if they don't already have that color. I also use Duct tape brand masking tape that comes in colors. I put the red tape on my jely, PB, pan handle, etc. I have red cooking spatulas & spoons. The tape comes in lots of nice colors so, pick your favorite.

You can get paint pens at the hobby store & Walmart. White or silver show up on dark colors.

0

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites




You can get utensils and containers in red if they don't already have that color. I also use Duct tape brand masking tape that comes in colors. I put the red tape on my jely, PB, pan handle, etc. I have red cooking spatulas & spoons. The tape comes in lots of nice colors so, pick your favorite.

You can get paint pens at the hobby store & Walmart. White or silver show up on dark colors.

Thanks for the tips! Can the duct tape go through the dishwasher?

0

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

Thanks for the suggestions! Inviting them over is a great idea, it's just that our place is *tiny* :P But I can squeeze us in at a push.

0

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

Since eating there is a regular event, I think I would cope by not having them cook for me at all for a while. If they are willing to give you some freezer space, you could make up several Gluten Free freezer meals at home, and take them there. That way when you are there they can just pull your meal out to reheat for you. It's not the same as having something they prepared, but at least you would be eating something safe. Maybe you could get away with eating a plain salad along with your meal if they have salad without croutons and the veggies haven't been chopped on CC'd cutting boards. But I think you need to explain that you are still getting sick from some unknown source and you want to be super careful until you get it figured out. If they are already trying to help you by buying gluten-free stuff then they should understand.

0

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

Thanks for the tips! Can the duct tape go through the dishwasher?

The colored kind is a cross between real duct tape and masking tape. I hand wash my pans and utensils most of the time. So I don't know would be the answer to that. The paint pens can usually go through a couple of times before you have to re- do. But that depends on the surface you write on.

0

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

I think you need to tell them the truth, that you're feeling better but still reacting to something, and trying to sort out whether you're one of the unlucky soy-sensitive celiacs or just reacting to crumbs. I would make sure they know how much it means that they're trying to work with you, but that you can't tell them exactly what your dietary needs are yet as you're still experimenting. It's OK to laugh at yourself for feeling crazy/obsessive, and to tell them that some days you think you're losing your mind. :P

With family it's usually pretty easy to offer to bring a safe dish to share. "Lunch sounds great, Mom. I'll bring some homemade soup to share."

0

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

Create an account or sign in to comment

You need to be a member in order to leave a comment

Create an account

Sign up for a new account in our community. It's easy!


Register a new account

Sign in

Already have an account? Sign in here.


Sign In Now
0

  • Forum Statistics

    • Total Topics
      104,636
    • Total Posts
      921,534
  • Topics

  • Posts

    • I have 2 insurance policies, one with my husband's company and one through mine. I also stretch out the more major work into the next year, so I can make the most use of my benefits. So, a dental implant for me takes about a year for me to complete.  I have the post put in at the end of one year and the tooth made about 6 months later. Honestly, the insurance company probably hates me because I max out my benefits every year. You do what ya gotta do!  I still have to pay for some of the work out of pocket but about 75% gets covered. If you pay cash for procedures then they usually charge a lower price. Haggle with the dentist over price. They like getting cash.
    • Did your doctor check for SIBO, H. pylori, ulcers, etc. when he was obtaining biopsies to check for celiac disease?  
    • Oh, and as I mentioned in my own post on pain, xanax. I swear. I tried it just to deal with the occasional panic I had at weird scary symptoms and clueless doctors. I am not a fan of long term use. But I recently found that .25 mg seems to aid with the neuropathic pain. It does not go away, but it helps. 
    • It does sound like a Glutening and you are just a few months into the diet.  It might help if you read our Newbie 101 thread under the "Coping" section.   Here is some information about rice milk: https://www.verywell.com/is-rice-dream-gluten-free-562354 Many, many celiacs are often lactose intolerant temorarily or permanently if you are naturally genetically inclined.  When I am glutened, I lose the ability to digest lactose for a while.   Salad?  Great but it can be rough on a sore gut!  Think soups, stews, easy-to-digest foods that you prepare yourself until you feel better.  Did your folks give you salad after a bout of flu?  Or did you stick with jello and broth?  I am intolerant still after three years to garlic and onions (the lactose resolved, thankfully).  You have a leaky gut (Google zonulin and Dr. Fasano who is a leading celiac researcher to verify that this is true) and that means you can become intolerant to anything (hopefully, just temporarily).   If you are 100% sure that you have had no access to gluten....did you eat out lately?.....then see your doctor.  Remember, celiac disease symptoms can change.  And here is the biggie.....it can take weeks, months or years to heal from celiac disease.  Two months in is nothing, really.  Why?  It takes time to figure out the diet and time for antibodies to come down.  celiac disease is an autoimmune disorder triggerEd by gluten.  once triggered it can go on and on damaging your gut especially with repeated glutenings (accidental or through cross contamination). I hope you feel better soon!  
    • I concur! I literally feel your pain as well. Like, at the moment, lol. Did you have an endo to see inflammation or damage? I am close to begging my GI for carafate or something to coat and protect. How about testing your antibodies to see if they are still rising? I read somewhere here rice milk may not be a good option.  Folks here have also suggested to me to stick with whole foods. Limit processed. Especially stuff that is not certified gluten-free, like chex. I think small amounts of gluten are in processed foids and can add up. I too reacted to lettuce the other day like I was ingesting glass. My sibling  had a food sensitivity panel done and it came back positive for a few things he had been eating a lot of. He can now eat them, but had to cut them out of his diet. Lettuce is probably on mine.  I have been drinking carrot and pomegranate juice,  dandelion root tea with hiney, aloe water, lots of squash, fish. Mild, no garlic, no onions or hot sauce. No coffee. It sucks.  Inflammation can tick off other organs, you mention a "Pain below". Not exactly sure which side, but certainly call your doc Monday. Sooner if the pain increases.
  • Upcoming Events

  • Blog Entries

  • Recent Status Updates

  • Who's Online (See full list)

  • Member Statistics

    • Total Members
      61,639
    • Most Online
      3,093

    Newest Member
    NickyW_UK
    Joined