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People Who Don't Want To Understand


tennisman

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tennisman Contributor

We all know people who just won't understand why we eat a gluten free diet . No matter how much you explain celiac disease and the health problems etc . Are these people just very stupid or are they doing it on purpose to wind us up ?

I think probably i'm over reacting a lot of the time but it's really doing my head in now . I have have been on the diet for 9 years and I'm just bored of it all the foods and drink I used to like I have eaten so much I no longer like these foods even junk for like sweets and fizzy drinks I dislike now :S

Yet people tell me I'm only gluten free because they think gluten free foods are free because it's called gluten FREE .... Surely this is to get a reaction out of me ? I can't believe anyone would even tell a celiac disease sufferer you only eat gluten free because they think gluten free food is free .

Also someone a non Celiac told me I know nothing about celiac disease and if I researched I will learn something . So 9 years with celiac disease and I know nothing about my own disease .

People have also told me celiac disease is not a disease but a tiny allergy or intolrence . I could go on all day about these stupid comments .

Am I right getting angry about these things or should I just ignore these comments because the people are saying these things to get a reaction out of me ?

I wish there was some way I could pass my celiac disease onto these people so they could understand what celiac disease really is . I just get so annoyed at these comments :(

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kareng Grand Master

Why do so many people have a chance to comment on your Celiac? Except for on here, I don't go around talking about it to everyone I meet. Even with people who know about it, we don't talk about it.

If these are your friends, then maybe its time to get new ones that are a little smarter? If they are your co-workers, maybe you can distance yourself a bit from them. We don't have to be friendly with the people we work with just polite.

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Bubba's Mom Enthusiast

It does sound like they're trying to get a rise out of you? It's hard enough navigating social situations without having these stupid comments. Maybe just have some sort of flipant comment ready and change the subject? Don't engage them, and they'll quit I'll bet?

Good luck!

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curlyfries Contributor

What was it that prompted the one person to tell you that you know nothing about celiac disease? Some of the statements make me wonder about the level of education of those people. I hope you set them straight. There are so many responses going on in my head right now.....just let me at 'em!

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Diane-in-FL Explorer

Well, that's a new twist on it.....gluten free means that the food is FREE?! Where does someone come up with that idea? Would be nice, though, wouldn't it? For quite a while, when I was first diagnosed, I had people confusing gluten and glucose. They were always surprised that I could have sweets. I don't understand some people. If a friend told me about an illness, I would be googling it to find out about it. I figured most people would, but apparently not. I have a cousin whose children (grown) have celiac and she is still woefully ignorant about it. It's baffling. :blink:

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Adalaide Mentor

Two weeks and I can't stand the stupidity that some family spouts at me. They only know because, well... they're family and I actually have to share a kitchen with some of them.

"When can you eat normal food again?"

"Do you have to be that picky about washing everything and what you cook in?"

"A little bread won't hurt you."

(To my husband) "Why is your wife so lazy?" There are days I literally can't sit up in a chair for more than 15 minutes. I'm not lazy, I'm sick. Huge difference.

"It's probably your bunny making you sick." This one angers me the most because I have explained like a bazillion times that humans can't get sick from house bunnies that never go outside. I'm also pretty sure a bunny can't give people autoimmune diseases.

As a general rule, in my experience, people who are uninformed (whether by choice or chance or stupidity) tend to say really, really stupid things. I find it's best to extract myself from situations where this occurs and promptly apply my head to a firm immobile object. Repeatedly. :lol: Okay, not really, but I do try to avoid ignorance and stupidity as much as possible. If you value your sanity I suggest you do the same.

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Booghead Contributor

I don't tell any one anything. I eat my meals at my home with my family, and I don't talk about any kind of health problems.

It is just easier to say nothing about it. Don't tell them your food is gluten free and they won't know which means they won't comment on it. And the people that did make these comments don't need to be around you anymore.

As for the comment about gluten-free food being free, gluten-free food is the most expensive s**t on the planet. It doesn't taste good, it doesn't look good and it costs 3 times as much as its gluten filled counter part.

*the gluten free food mentioned here is the processed foods. I.E. gluten-free cookies, gluten-free bread, gluten-free brownies. The naturally gluten free food is very tasty.

That is all.

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tennisman Contributor

Thanks for the replies :)

I guess it's my own fault party the people who say study things in real life like friends I don't see anymore . It's more online where the problem is . Everytime I see an article about celiac disease and there are negative comments I just get angry and I guess that encourages people to wind me up more .

Here is the latest article story it's from the england or maybe it should be re named to stupidland. Basically we get prescriptions on the national health service bread , pasta , crackers , flour , bread mixes all plain replacement foods . We pay just over 100 pounds to get these prescriptions . Recently the government wanted to cut down on ' luxury ' gluten-free foods from prescription . Now they want the gluten-free banned completely . The article has had a lot of comments from negative non celiac's saying stupid things . The national health service in uk give drug addicts illegal drugs they give smokers help for giving up smoking but they want to ban gluten-free food it annoys me too much .

Here is an example comment that is annoying me - I don't want my tax money spent on feeding people with a food intolerance. I helped pay (via taxes) for the research and diagnosis and don't begrudge it for a minute. However, gluten free is NOT a treatment or medication. The taxpayer should not foot the bill.

After reading this you wouldn't believe how mad I get. How a person without celiac disease can say gluten free is not a treatment or medication :(

Like everyone here celiac disease has wrecked many years of my life I have now had 7 years in a row with extra problems and when celiac disease gets talked about an intolrence and not taken seriously I get too annoyed .

Here is another few comments all non celiac's - downgrading a diagnosis to ?intolerance? (to make it sound like a fad or phase that people go through).

It's sad to read such incorrect comments from so many coeliacs who are uneducated about their own illness!

I'd like to eat meat every day, many people would consider that a "staple" part of their diet but I can't afford it and I doubt the NHS will prescribe me any!

These are just a few examples , I know probably I shouldn't take these comments so personally but I find them very hurtfull :(

I should just let this go but celiac disease is treated as a joke and I want it to be taken seriously . This is a massive set back for celiac disease . I just don't want the uneducated win this battle about celiac disease being not serious :(

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Takala Enthusiast

Oh, the cultural thing is a bit different, as over here, (across the pond) if you are not medicated to the gills with some sort of addictive or prescription **** with horrible side effects, you have nutcases telling you that you don't really have the disease.

You really have your hands full over there with the return of the Thatcherites trying to privatize the NHS and all this "austerity" - consider that on the internet, you never really know who or what you could be interacting with, and these trolls could have another agenda that they are not disclosing. I follow a few "food trolls" over here and their real life identities, and who is paying them to say this garbage they have posted on the internet, would shock some of their real life acquaintances - they are not stupid, they are usually very smart, highly educated, and very, very malicious. The maliciousness extends to being able to organize other stupid idiots to post garbage on the internet for them - I've seen solicitations from one of the dishonest, creepy Big Dog "science" editors at a well known blog calling for people who can critique science writing online, and the criteria is, "no science background needed."

Think about that. They're given talking points written by some organization funded by a corporate think tank, and sent out to spread it.

Creeps like this, who make it a big deal to stay anonymous on the internet and/or who change their usernames a lot while cruising around sowing their particular disinformation, are pathetic. That's why they stay semi - anon, because in a clean debate, any of us could and do wipe the floor with them. Don't take it personally, they're just doing it for money.

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tennisman Contributor

Oh, the cultural thing is a bit different, as over here, (across the pond) if you are not medicated to the gills with some sort of addictive or prescription **** with horrible side effects, you have nutcases telling you that you don't really have the disease.

You really have your hands full over there with the return of the Thatcherites trying to privatize the NHS and all this "austerity" - consider that on the internet, you never really know who or what you could be interacting with, and these trolls could have another agenda that they are not disclosing. I follow a few "food trolls" over here and their real life identities, and who is paying them to say this garbage they have posted on the internet, would shock some of their real life acquaintances - they are not stupid, they are usually very smart, highly educated, and very, very malicious. The maliciousness extends to being able to organize other stupid idiots to post garbage on the internet for them - I've seen solicitations from one of the dishonest, creepy Big Dog "science" editors at a well known blog calling for people who can critique science writing online, and the criteria is, "no science background needed."

Think about that. They're given talking points written by some organization funded by a corporate think tank, and sent out to spread it.

Creeps like this, who make it a big deal to stay anonymous on the internet and/or who change their usernames a lot while cruising around sowing their particular disinformation, are pathetic. That's why they stay semi - anon, because in a clean debate, any of us could and do wipe the floor with them. Don't take it personally, they're just doing it for money.

That's bad these nutcases are pathetic . It's messed up these things can happen . Someone who commented from the article has joined the Coeliac UK facebook page and said some bad ridiculously stupid things . He is getting ripped apart now :P It turns out some of these people are pretending to have celiac disease and telling people who have celiac disease they are uneducated . But there strange comments and wrong info about celiac disease is making them get caught out at fake Celiac's wow that sounds strange fake Celiac's . Maybe they will get celiac disease after complaining that would be justice :)

Gotta find out who has sent the trolls to this article .

I will try not to take it personally , on the article some none Celiac's have stuck up for Celiac's so it seems it's just a few morons causing trouble . Thanks for the reply :)

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tbritt Rookie

"A little bread won't hurt you!" I guess we're supposed to wash it off. I wish I had gluten cleansing holy water to pour on all of the things I suspect my be cross contaminated.

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tbritt Rookie

I used to stop myself from being hateful, but when somebody is rude about me eating gluten free, I just tell them I hope they get to experience the kind of pain I experience when I eat gluten. Sometimes I mention explosive diarrhea and excruciating joint pain that kept me awake for nine months.

So what if they think I'm nasty. I think the same of them.

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kaity Apprentice

there was this one time when i went to a friend of mine with my son, she knows that my son is celiac so i was planning on taking his snacks but she told me that everything is going to be gluten free, so i was so happy that i am not going to be worried of him eating something with gluten in it.

needless to say i went there and when we were watching a movie she got popcorn (a very good start), then she went back to the kitchen and got cake, i asked her is this gluten free, so she assured to me that they are and said that she read the ingredients over and over again, so i told her to show me the box the first ingredient said flour, so i told her that this contains gluten, do she started telling me if you dont want to eat it dont eat it, but look how skinny your son is let him eat some, so i told her about his problem AGAIN, then she jumped up and told me well 3 months ago on his birthday he was eating cake and cookies, and i am pretty sure they were made of gluten, so if he had it for more than two years and nothing happened i am sure he can have it now....

i dont know why i stood there arguing with her anyways, i sent my husband a msg to call me and pretend that it is an emergency so he did and i left that day and never returned, now we are still friends but not that close

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saintmaybe Collaborator

Up to this point, I haven't found anyone who was really deliberately nasty to me. There's a whole heck of a lot of bewildered ignorance, or the usual same stupid stuff that people say, but nothing that suggests that people aren't supportive of it.

I think a lot of it has to do with the fact that most of my work colleagues saw me shrink in half when my acute celiac set in. I lost 40lbs basically overnight, but kept working even when I was at my sickest, and probably *should* have gone out on medical. So, I might get some silly comments or questions, but most of them continue to see how much I struggle with it every day.

I get a lot of "Oh, you can't eat cake? Well, what about____________?" And then I clarify anything with wheat. And then we have to do the list thing...pasta, bread, pizza, hamburgers, etc.

Then there's, "Oh, I would die if I couldn't eat _________." (This was from a trained nutritionist by the way :)). Or, "I would get so bored with your diet." Yep, me too. But alas.

I also get a lot of people coming up to me who genuinely want to talk about it and know about it. I'm a busy person at work, so that can sometimes get annoying, but I try to make time. Because generally, they're asking for themselves or someone else they know. And since I know how terrifying it is to be extremely ill with no known cause...I feel like it's a personal responsibility to spread knowledge about celiac if I can.

Oddly, my mom has been the worst offender when it comes to hurtful comments, but that is nothing new. "I just don't understand how wheat can be hurting you. You've eaten it all your life." Yes, Mom. Exactly the problem. Or my favorite, the appeals to history AND/OR science AND/OR religion. "People have been eating wheat for thousands of years, and they've been fine and healthy. It's in the bible as the staff of life." Not having this argument for the umpteenth time, Mom.

She's always downplayed, minimized, or ignored my medical problems. Part of the reason I was diagnosed so late is because we didn't go see the doctors for my insomnia or migraines when I was a kid, or the dermotologist for the rash on my back, or a psychiatrist for my pervasive depression. The care I've gotten is as I've been able to afford it, on my own terms, after I became and adult and moved out.

So to get back to your original post, there's plenty of people out there who are extremely harmful, and deliberately ignorant. Many because they're corporate shills or government actors pushing an agenda, but also because they really don't WANT to understand and it doesn't matter how much you try to educate them. It will never matter. So to be a downer, but that's the way it is.

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Kjas Newbie

My response to this is always the following, they need to think before they say crap like this.

"Oh, I would die if I couldn't eat bread."

"Don't worry, it'll kill you first."

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Aly1 Contributor

I am new to gluten-free and new to knowing I have a problem. It dismays me to read these comments and what I can expect to hear from people. I don't really understand why people have opinions about things they know nothing about. I have been in a wheelchair due to neuropathy for 5 years. I am able to walk but the pain I had before my wheelcbair was so severe that I was all but home bound and was taking opiates around the clock (and still in pain). I chose to use a wheelchair so I could get on with my life. Just this morning my mom tells me to take a walk outside so I can go play with my daughter in the snow. Excuse me? Of all people she knows what I've been through, but even so, there she was telling me to just go out walking (and trust me, after 5 years immobility I couldn't do that if I wanted to.)

I wish people would just keep their thoughts to themselves! :/

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tennisman Contributor

I used to stop myself from being hateful, but when somebody is rude about me eating gluten free, I just tell them I hope they get to experience the kind of pain I experience when I eat gluten. Sometimes I mention explosive diarrhea and excruciating joint pain that kept me awake for nine months.

So what if they think I'm nasty. I think the same of them.

Good thinking give them a taste of there own medicine . I think some people are just ignorant . Mention the D while they are eating ;)

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tennisman Contributor

there was this one time when i went to a friend of mine with my son, she knows that my son is celiac so i was planning on taking his snacks but she told me that everything is going to be gluten free, so i was so happy that i am not going to be worried of him eating something with gluten in it.

needless to say i went there and when we were watching a movie she got popcorn (a very good start), then she went back to the kitchen and got cake, i asked her is this gluten free, so she assured to me that they are and said that she read the ingredients over and over again, so i told her to show me the box the first ingredient said flour, so i told her that this contains gluten, do she started telling me if you dont want to eat it dont eat it, but look how skinny your son is let him eat some, so i told her about his problem AGAIN, then she jumped up and told me well 3 months ago on his birthday he was eating cake and cookies, and i am pretty sure they were made of gluten, so if he had it for more than two years and nothing happened i am sure he can have it now....

i dont know why i stood there arguing with her anyways, i sent my husband a msg to call me and pretend that it is an emergency so he did and i left that day and never returned, now we are still friends but not that close

That sucks glad you managed to get away quickly . It's very terrible non celiac's try and give advice they know nothing about.

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tennisman Contributor

Up to this point, I haven't found anyone who was really deliberately nasty to me. There's a whole heck of a lot of bewildered ignorance, or the usual same stupid stuff that people say, but nothing that suggests that people aren't supportive of it.

I think a lot of it has to do with the fact that most of my work colleagues saw me shrink in half when my acute celiac set in. I lost 40lbs basically overnight, but kept working even when I was at my sickest, and probably *should* have gone out on medical. So, I might get some silly comments or questions, but most of them continue to see how much I struggle with it every day.

I get a lot of "Oh, you can't eat cake? Well, what about____________?" And then I clarify anything with wheat. And then we have to do the list thing...pasta, bread, pizza, hamburgers, etc.

Then there's, "Oh, I would die if I couldn't eat _________." (This was from a trained nutritionist by the way :)). Or, "I would get so bored with your diet." Yep, me too. But alas.

I also get a lot of people coming up to me who genuinely want to talk about it and know about it. I'm a busy person at work, so that can sometimes get annoying, but I try to make time. Because generally, they're asking for themselves or someone else they know. And since I know how terrifying it is to be extremely ill with no known cause...I feel like it's a personal responsibility to spread knowledge about celiac if I can.

Oddly, my mom has been the worst offender when it comes to hurtful comments, but that is nothing new. "I just don't understand how wheat can be hurting you. You've eaten it all your life." Yes, Mom. Exactly the problem. Or my favorite, the appeals to history AND/OR science AND/OR religion. "People have been eating wheat for thousands of years, and they've been fine and healthy. It's in the bible as the staff of life." Not having this argument for the umpteenth time, Mom.

She's always downplayed, minimized, or ignored my medical problems. Part of the reason I was diagnosed so late is because we didn't go see the doctors for my insomnia or migraines when I was a kid, or the dermotologist for the rash on my back, or a psychiatrist for my pervasive depression. The care I've gotten is as I've been able to afford it, on my own terms, after I became and adult and moved out.

So to get back to your original post, there's plenty of people out there who are extremely harmful, and deliberately ignorant. Many because they're corporate shills or government actors pushing an agenda, but also because they really don't WANT to understand and it doesn't matter how much you try to educate them. It will never matter. So to be a downer, but that's the way it is.

I'm surprised a nutritionist would say that :) I kinda like the comments about " I don't know how you can stick to the diet " . I look at in a few ways 1 we celiac's can stick to a diet for years never cheating which other people say they couldn't do . Kind of makes me feel good I have achieved something which someone else thinks is difficult . 2 they have actually thought about the diet and difficult it could be instead or making a negative comment.

That's good people are interested and want to learn about celiac disease , and you can give the the details about it so they understand properly :) A few times at parties people ask why don't I drink beer and interested in celiac disease . Although 1 time I told 1 person about celiac disease and they poured beer on my food luckily I spotted him otherwise it would have been a nasty wa to be glutened .

Sorry you didn't get to the doctor's quicker I hope all your symptoms are gone now . I don't like all that people have been eating wheat since ... Shame gluten was ever invented lol.

I think these people were set up . On Coeliac uk facebook the person said prescription foods are junk and it's crazy the national health service should give anyone bread , pasta , biscuits , cakes and corn flakes . But little does this person know cakes and corn flakes are not prescription items . Caught red handed :)

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tennisman Contributor

My response to this is always the following, they need to think before they say crap like this.

"Oh, I would die if I couldn't eat bread."

"Don't worry, it'll kill you first."

I agree they need to think before they speak !

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tennisman Contributor

I am new to gluten-free and new to knowing I have a problem. It dismays me to read these comments and what I can expect to hear from people. I don't really understand why people have opinions about things they know nothing about. I have been in a wheelchair due to neuropathy for 5 years. I am able to walk but the pain I had before my wheelcbair was so severe that I was all but home bound and was taking opiates around the clock (and still in pain). I chose to use a wheelchair so I could get on with my life. Just this morning my mom tells me to take a walk outside so I can go play with my daughter in the snow. Excuse me? Of all people she knows what I've been through, but even so, there she was telling me to just go out walking (and trust me, after 5 years immobility I couldn't do that if I wanted to.)

I wish people would just keep their thoughts to themselves! :/

I hope you won't have to hear any negative comments . It's ridiculous why the people say things especially if they are only doing it to wind us up. Sorry to hear about your medical problems , I hope gluten free will help you :)

It would be nice if people kept their thoughts to themselves maybe 1 day :)

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GFinDC Veteran

The same kind of thing happens on many internet new stories. There always seem to be 2 or 3 knuckleheads that want to stir things up by taking a totally ignorant position. The thing about gluten-free food being free though is funny. That one made me laugh. :)

I think it is helpful to ignore the knuckleheads. Maybe respond just with facts and advice for people who honestly might want to know what celiac is about. There are many more celiacs undiagnosed than there are diagnosed. And many more people who read things but never comment. SO you never really know who you might help by posting helpful information on a story like that. It's the same on this site. There are many, many more people reading it every day than there are posting. There is a lurker explosion. Most of the people reading this forum are marked as "guest".

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