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Husband Thinks I'm Going On A Fad Diet!


Stubborn red head

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Stubborn red head Apprentice

Ok so my mother my Step father, and well all of my brothers and sisters have thought for years that I should be Gluten Free weather or not I am Celiac is another question. I have not seen a doctor about this. I just decided after a few weeks of serious stomach pain and lack of energy being short with people. Just had a bad month or so. I decided to go gluten-free because I knew that there was a possibility that I could be considering my mother has been diagnosed with Celiac. So I started the gluten-free Diet and feel like a new person after just two weeks or so.

My husband that I have been with for almost four years now made the comment the other night that he doesn't understand y I all the sudden started having issues and he thinks its all in my head because I had been talking about going on a weight loss diet this year due to being 250lb and 5'8 tall. SO yes I am over weight and yes I wanted to go on a diet but I wasn't thinking about this. I had no intentions of going gluten-free. My Dear husband thinks I have went on this diet to loose weight quick... Ummm no.

How do I convince him that this is a life style change and not just a passing fad. On the other hand he is being supportive for now at least. I just hope that in 2 or 3 months down the road he is going to start asking when I am going to start eating normal again.

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raea2002 Apprentice

That's a hard one. He hasn't noticed any improvement in your behavior/mood? My husband is the one who says he can "see it in my eyes" when I start feeling better off gluten. I'm blessed with a supportive spouse.

Maybe you will loose weight and your health will improve and he wont care. Maybe have your mom casually talk to him about it. Have you gone for testing?

Hope this helps.

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mamaw Community Regular

Is there a reason why you can't get tested to clear up any misunderstandings?With your mother having celiac your odds are about 1in 22 ... And even if you don't have full blown celiac with villi damage you could be gluten sensitive.. The only treatment for either is a totally gluten free diet.....An elimination diet is the only way to test for gluten sensitivity..

Do you have other symptoms as well? can your husband not see that you are feeling better? Maybe he is protesting because he doesn't want to follow the gluten-free diet with you...he still can be supportive to you & eat gluten...there are many shared families when it comes to food.. With shared kitchens changes has to be made, like no double dipping in jars, separate toasters or toasta bags, no putting hands in bags that are shared & so on....

If pots & pans & utensils are scratched or damaged you may need to buy a couple of things just for gluten-free cooking...it also will be more work for whoever does the cooking ie: 2 separate pots for cooking pasta, no laying food directly on counters...

Does he know celiac is hereditary?Maybe get him some good info about this subject & he may understand better about gluten free...

blessings

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nmull #newly diagnosed Newbie

I have dealt with the same thing! Not with a husband but with my family and Co workers. It makes you feel mad and alone. Just tonight my Mom said Well I Just added a little bit to the Dish it won't hurt you... Not only are you going thru this difficult transition where your emotions are unpredictable (or at least mine are) You feel as if you have to defend yourself for wanting to feel better. I am sorry I wish I had a solution for you :) I have tried printing information- showing websites. Maybe that will inform him of the importance of this diet. Good luck :)

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Stubborn red head Apprentice

My Husband is wonderful but he works out of town, only home Saturday and Sunday, for this reason it is harder for him to notice the changes that is already taken place. I didn't go through the testing because I do not have a Family Doctor or a internist, I cant get a family doctor because of my medical history and I cant get a internist because I don't have a family doctor... all I know is that I feel like I am 16 years again.

I have talked to him about what I have experienced in the few weeks while on the diet and all he keeps saying is why havent you had the reactions longer than just a few weeks. I fed him the line that I remember my mom saying and thats that if I am intolerant rather than celiac, then it can lay dormant for years and the symptoms come out of nowhere, normally brought out by stress or other illnesses.

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Ninja Contributor

You could try keeping a journal to share with him? A lot of people seem to respond better when there is some kind of documentation (as terrible as it sounds!). This could maybe provide some insight for him as to how you are feeling on a day to day basis when he isn't around to witness it. What you're thinking, the changes you've noticed physically, emotionally and mentally... etc. :)

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AVR1962 Collaborator

It is really an adjustment for the whole family and even your friends. My husband would speak for me when we were out with friends and he would tell them my system was messed up and I just needed to see if time would make a difference, that was after the diagnosis. My mom thinks the gluten-free diets are in people's heads and she definatly does not agree with vit supplementing so that makes me doubly crazy I am sure, in her opinion.

I continually quote from my readings how bad gluten is for you. With my husband, friends and my family (with the exception of my 2 daughters who are gluten-free) it goes in one ear and out the other. I know they could all feel better if they woudl go gluten-free but they do not see it as their issue. I have a friend right now who is going thru exactly what I did.....doc visits, vits low, tired and I am so trying to get her to try a gluten-free diet but she keeps going to the docs and continually frustrated because she is getting no answers.

Know that no one may support you or listen but that this is best for you and everyone can think whatever they want. Gluten is very very bad for the body and while it may not show it's ugly head in us all it still causes issues. Denial is very real.....we have been told all our likes that whole wheat is great for us so that is hard to get out of our heads. What happens when person is diagnosed with Diabetes.....grains have to go....why? because they are not good for ourt body and our body is reacting. People get that and they pay attention. It's not the same with gluten and that is unfortunate.

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mamaw Community Regular

I'm just a tad confused by your statement I don't have a medical doctor or can't get an Internist because of past medical conditions. PLEASE explain that....if you have issues then some type of intervention would be needed...

with that being said you may have something totally different going on within your body besides the consideration of celiac or gluten sensitivity..not to rule out either of the latter...

There has to be a doctor who would treat you. You need to rule out other problems, even simple blood work would give you great insight..Gallbladder screening, liver function test, kidney analysis... You wouldn't want to find out when its to late on other health issues...

By the way I never had to have a referral for an internist, many of them in our area treat as a general practitioner...speciality doctors we need a referral...that may be not so for all areas...

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Stubborn red head Apprentice

I didn't have health insurance for years, now that I do I went to just about every family doctor in town. All said that they couldn't take me due to my health history, and that I needed to see a internist as my family doctor. But none of them would refer me to one since I wasn't a patient. I called all the internist in the city and not a one will take me without a referral.. I do have a Neurologist and have had a conversation with him about referring me to an internist. He said that if I cant find one in the next few weeks before our next appointment then he will refer me.

Gallbladder gone at the age of 15....

Pancreas was damage by the gallbladder, but my surgeon said that it would repair its self. I was sent for a scan and some blood test year later to test its function, it was at 100%

Kidney's touch and go.. I have had 5 close calls with them in the last 6 years I had to cut out all sodas coffee and tea and since they haven't had a single infection in two years.

Liver I am not sure. I dont think I ever had any issues with it before.

I have hydrocephalus, brain disorder likely birth defect.

I have weak joints, my ankles are always rolling and I have recently developed tendinitis in my left wrist.

Before going gluten-free after every meal in about 30 minutes from finishing I would end up in a fetal position for about 30 minutes to an hour sometimes longer. I began getting up in the middle of the night (just like mom did) to puke what I had eat that day.

I havent done any of that since day 3 or maybe 4 of being gluten-free

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mamaw Community Regular

I don't know where you live but that's bull that a PCP will not see you...What if you get a sore throat or for minor issues,ie: poison ivy... You are being unfairly mistreated by your town doctors ...Do you have fast clinics in your area.They treat anyone. I understand that you have major health issues in the past but a PCP should deal with the daily health stuff & then if need be send you on to a speciality doc.. Call a local hospital for a new to area PCP.. They take anyone just to get established...

You probably have an issue with the gluten but since you do have a history you should check all else out so you don't miss some important issue...a good physical routine blood work. I too have many health issues so a yearly is a must for me..another thing you should check on is the thyroid gland..

You mentioned kidney problems again please check these out..... if need be contact your local health & welfare for info ..I honestly don't think they are permitted to deny anyone health access...insured, uninsured,..

hugs

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Stubborn red head Apprentice

I had one that said that he would take me on but wouldn't do anything for me except refer me to everyone else, and as for being sick its easier to go to the clinic then to get in on a doctor these days. That it would be easier just to use a Internist as a PCP. Sounds great right.... wrong no one will take me without a referral.

There are Primary care clinics, I have asked them for a referral and they are like you don't need a Internist you first need a PCP.. I don't know what to do, I am completely lost on that account. I monitor my kidney function by the color o my pee. I know its not completely accurate but by drinking plenty of water, Gatorade and juices I am keeping them flushed and without infection, I want a Internist darn it! I really hope that my Neurologist will refer me next month.I am sick and tired of being told I need a PCP and no one willing to help me.

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mamaw Community Regular

Okay you have one who will take you but only refer you to an Internist or a speciality doc. Don't walk run to him get a REFERRAL...It's a start... I do believe no one in the US is allowed to be denied medical help... I do believe that is going against the doctors oath...hospitals are not permitted to turn people away who have no insurance,, there are funds set-up for this type of incidents or a payment plan after treatment has already taken place...

There are laws governing health care.

What if you were having a seizure& no one would see you? Big fat lawsuit...

You truly need to find out the law in your state, believe me I'm positive you can get a doctor......if you want to send me a private message I bet I find you a doctor in your area... .

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Stubborn red head Apprentice

Thanks so much mamaw for your help, and advise. I called a few internists today to see what I would have to do to get a referral to be a patient and they said that I would have to go to a primary care clinic and ask, and if they deny me then I should go to anther there are atleast 5 in the city, one should give me what I need. If not I have the appointment in a month with my Neurologist. He is awesome and should give me a referral when I tell him what I am going through. Today even though he is not a heart doctor he had me do a stress test because I was hospitalized a few weeks ago over my blood pressure going 174/120 and passing out. I really have a good dr. in him.

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mamaw Community Regular

How did your stress test come out???Try to call your local hospital & talk to a patient adovcate, they should be able to guide you as well..Please don't be afraid to speak up & get pushy.. This is your health .......this is just so wrong for you to be put through all this bull....glad you have trust in one doctor...

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Stubborn red head Apprentice

It went normal.. I cant wait for the next tests he has me scheduled for. He is saying my issues are developmental and could go back into remission any day, meaning my dizzy and fog spells, my migraines and pressure headaches. While I am having issues is the time to do the tests. If they are not giving me problems then the tests are useless.

Almost makes me want to go back on the gluten to make sure the test come out right but I have never felt better than each and every morning I wake up feeling better than the day before, unless I worked out to much then my muscles are screaming at me.

I have a two page list of doctors and their contact info to help me get a PCP but I went through all of them, with the exception of the ones on the west side, not a very save neighborhood.

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mushroom Proficient

Oh, all lthis is just so much gobbledygook, it is driving me crazy. Damned bureaucrats who cannot see beyond the ends of their noses. Call your insurance company, ask if they have an ombudsman or patient's advocate or some such person, and tell whoever you are referred to what is happening to you and what are they going to do about it???? :ph34r: Effectively you are being denied insured health care (well, except for the neurologist., the good guy). Put the onus on them to find you a treating doctor, i.e. turn the tables on them. I know at one time with an HMO I had a very hard time finding a PCP because no one was accepting new patients except the doctor no one wanted to see :rolleyes: and it is a very stressful situation. If you don't get anywhere with this person tell them you are going to report the insurance company and the HMO group to the state medical board. Get really pushy. I found out that the squeaky wheel really does get the grease :)

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Pauliewog Contributor

Gluten or no gluten, weight loss is still the matter of calories in and calories out. I am now 3 months into gluten free and I haven't lost any weight! While wheat is out, I've found all sorts of yummy things to take up those calories!!!

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GFinDC Veteran

Gluten or no gluten, weight loss is still the matter of calories in and calories out. I am now 3 months into gluten free and I haven't lost any weight! While wheat is out, I've found all sorts of yummy things to take up those calories!!!

Hi Pauliwog is right, gluten-free is not a weight loss diet. It is a medical diet to prevent damage to your body. You may end up losing or gaining weight for a while. People sometimes enter a period of intense hunger after going gluten-free. The way to deal with that is to eat protein with every meal, and cut down on carbs, starches and sugars. But you may find you gain weight even eating the same amounts of food as you did before the diet. That is because if your intestine is damaged, and then heals, it will start absorbing more nutrients than it did before. And often people are low on vitamins and minerals and when they start healing their body needs more of those, not less. That early phase hunger should pass after a while though, and you may find yourself (after a while) not as hungry as you were used to being in the past. Once your intestine heals and you can absorb proper amounts of nutrients your cravings for foods can diminish. There are people who gain weight with celiac, and some people say it is the body storing every calorie it can in response to a perceived starvation diet. The idea is that if the body isn't getting enough vitamins etc, it thinks it is starving and goes into a self preservation mode of storing everything as fat. So you may end up losing weight on the gluten-free diet after a while if that is your case.

Staying away from processed foods, including gluten-free processed foods for the first 3 months is a good idea. Eat only whole foods you cook yourself at home. You will get the best nutrition from whole foods vs. processed, and have fewer chances of being cross contaminated.

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Stubborn red head Apprentice

I completely agree. All of my cook, mom is a baker of all things, and my stepdad(dad) is a chief. I know how to cook and for the most part I am eating foods that I am making myself. I have found though that I can get 8 Char-grilled nuggets and a small salad from Chick Fil A and it pretty much satisfies me. When I was on the breads I was always munching, now that I am of Gluten I am eating healthier because I am grabbing a apple or a orange instead of a meal or snack bar as a snack. I am loving how my body it taking this. I am craving less sugar and sweets, more fruits and meats. I am loving it. Just this evening I went to walmart because I was craving cookies, picked up a snicker bar some Reese's cups and 2lbs of thick cut deli meat and some fresh sliced cheese.

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  • 4 weeks later...
Stubborn red head Apprentice

Ok so I just got back from the doctors office. I dont have a family doctor right now still waiting on that one but on the other hand, I have a wonderful Neurologist that is helping me keep my Gluten Ataxia under control. I told him today about going Gluten free and at first he was like I dont think it could be then I ran down me symptoms other than my Neuro, and He was like there is a distinct possibility that you have issues with gluten and as long as you are feeling better then I will do nothing, just monitor you and if something comes across that shows that you need medication then that when we will discuss that. Until then keep up the good work and stay calm, no stress. (Stress is my trigger for seizures)

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mushroom Proficient

I am glad your neuro is open to the idea of celiac. You may find it is the source of your seizures, too.

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