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Even My Mom Can Be Rude About Celiac


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11 replies to this topic

#1 Kimbalou

 
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Posted 13 May 2012 - 01:30 PM

I am celebrating Mother's Day with my family next weekend because I had to work today. We decided we don't want to cook. So, my mom told me she would get pizza. I reminded her I couldn't eat pizza. She said "well, we can get it for the people who can eat it." (huh? What about me?!) Then I said we could get Chinese food and she menitoned Panda Express. I have told gher before that panda is not gluten free. I told her we could get chinese from a regular restaurant and I would make sure it was gluten free. She sounded so frustrated and just said "well, maybe you should just bring your own food!" I told her it really isn't that hard to find a place with gluten-free food. Since I am a mother too, I felt like it was only fair to have food I could eat. She makes me feel like a burden when I have to eat gluten-free. She refuses to get tested for it, and that bugs me too...but it's her life.
I just think it's rude to mention getting pizza as the first choice! I told her, pizza would be ok if she had a gluten-free pizza place near her (I live an hour away where we have some gluten-free pizza places.) She said she didn't know if they had any gluten-free pizza places near her...and I know she won't call to find any.\
Thanks for letting me vent. I just think when there's not a plan in place for the food to begin with, it's ok for her to figure out a place that I can eat at too. Even my own mom doesn't get it:(
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11/19/10 diagnosed with Celiac disease after positive blood test
12/14/10 Biopsy positive for Celiac disease

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#2 dani nero

 
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Posted 13 May 2012 - 02:01 PM

Life really sucks for us sometimes. Maybe a little more than sometimes :-( Sorry you had to put up with that type of attitude. For me it's my dad who can be awful.. he acts as if the food I eat is uneatable.

*hug hug hug*
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Self diagnosed January 2012, and on elimination, low-salicylate & low-iodine diet.
Also G6PD

#3 Ninja

 
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Posted 13 May 2012 - 02:20 PM

On Mother's day?! :( That sounds awful, I'm so sorry you had to deal with that on your day. I get it. My dad likes to make dinner for us on the weekends, however he doesn't take the necessary precautions as he is the gluten eater in the family) to keep things free of cc. He gets frustrated when I begin to tell him what he needs to do to keep things safe (washing hands, etc), but he doesn't want to learn it himself, either. It really is the truth that if you don't have to deal with it you don't understand.

Hugs,
~Laura
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Gluten Free 2/12 

 

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#4 Mnicole1981

 
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Posted 13 May 2012 - 02:59 PM

I understand your frustration. This is new for me and we had dinner at my Grandma's and she did not seem to understand that some things will make me sick. I ate what she cooked and I got the left side pain, cramping, and nausea.
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gluten-gree as of May 9, 2012

#5 1desperateladysaved

 
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Posted 13 May 2012 - 03:02 PM

This is my life every day. I live with 5 people that cannot eat gluten free. I am hoping that one day it will be different. It already has gotten better as people have discovered that is much easier to make one meal which Mom can eat.

We must do what we must do. Hopefully, we are rewarded for it; I know I am.
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#6 ravenwoodglass

 
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Posted 13 May 2012 - 03:05 PM

Kim, something that might work for you all is to put the name of your Mom's city and the words 'gluten free restaurants' in a search engine. See what comes up and then suggest a couple that she could pick her favorite from. That might work better than asking her where she wants to go. People don't understand how difficult it is for us and it can be hard for them when the suggestions they make have to be nixed by us. That makes both parties frustrated. I hope you can find a good safe and acceptable solution that will keep you safe and also be good for the rest of the family.
  • 0
Courage does not always roar, sometimes courage is the quiet voice at the end of the day saying
"I will try again tommorrow" (Mary Anne Radmacher)


celiac 49 years - Misdiagnosed for 45
Blood tested and repeatedly negative
Diagnosed by Allergist with elimination diet and diagnosis confirmed by GI in 2002
Misdiagnoses for 15 years were IBS-D, ataxia, migraines, anxiety, depression, fibromyalgia, parathesias, arthritis, livedo reticularis, hairloss, premature menopause, osteoporosis, kidney damage, diverticulosis, prediabetes and ulcers, dermatitis herpeformis
All bold resoved or went into remission with proper diagnosis of Celiac November 2002
Some residual nerve damage remains as of 2006- this has continued to resolve after eliminating soy in 2007

Mother died of celiac related cancer at 56
Twin brother died as a result of autoimmune liver destruction at age 15

Children 2 with Ulcers, GERD, Depression, , 1 with DH, 1 with severe growth stunting (male adult 5 feet)both finally diagnosed Celiac through blood testing and 1 with endo 6 months after Mom


Positive to Soy and Casien also Aug 2007

Gluten Sensitivity Gene Test Aug 2007
HLA-DQB1 Molecular analysis, Allele 1 0303

HLA-DQB1 Molecular analysis, Allele 2 0303

Serologic equivalent: HLA-DQ 3,3 (Subtype 9,9)

#7 Carebear

 
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Posted 13 May 2012 - 04:23 PM

Ugh that sounds so frustrating!!! My family likes to pretend I don't have dietary restrictions and continues to try and make me plates full of allergens and whatnot around the holidays.

I try my best to make sure I'm the first one to suggest a place to eat when we go out, and always google and call some gluten free places around my parents when I'm in town.
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#8 mamaw

 
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Posted 14 May 2012 - 05:28 AM

We understand that some family membes can't get gluten-free.. I think when a Mom doesn't get it it becomes hurtful... As we think of our Mom as our rock & pillar to turn too...My Mom is gone but she always understood so I was very lucky.

But for other family gatherings I take my own food, always. I never expect anyone who is not gluten-free to understand the risks of being gluten-free.. Just easier to take my own & enjoy the friendship part of the day....and not be sick after.If I know what the food is going to be then I'll match it & I always take extras for others who dare to taste gluten-free..I have been asked to bring gluten-free foods to gatherings because the gluten eaters enjoyed the food..Once they find out our food is good , then we have won part of the battle...

hugs
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#9 MikeOhio

 
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Posted 15 May 2012 - 08:29 PM

Sorry to hear that. My mom's usually pretty good about eating out although I have to eat a lot of french fries and salads and dairy products sometimes. I live in a rural area myself so there's no gluten free restaurants here. I'm thinking about maybe getting some pepper steak from the local Chinese restaurant sometimes. I don't know if I recommend that for you though, but you may be able to find something from a Chinese place. One would hope that with the choice of a gluten free restaurant available your mother could accommodate you
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#10 ravenwoodglass

 
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Posted 16 May 2012 - 02:27 AM

Sorry to hear that. My mom's usually pretty good about eating out although I have to eat a lot of french fries and salads and dairy products sometimes. I live in a rural area myself so there's no gluten free restaurants here. I'm thinking about maybe getting some pepper steak from the local Chinese restaurant sometimes. I don't know if I recommend that for you though, but you may be able to find something from a Chinese place. One would hope that with the choice of a gluten free restaurant available your mother could accommodate you


Do make sure to ask if they marinate the meat with soy sauce. Regular soy sauce has wheat so you would want to avoid that.
  • 0
Courage does not always roar, sometimes courage is the quiet voice at the end of the day saying
"I will try again tommorrow" (Mary Anne Radmacher)


celiac 49 years - Misdiagnosed for 45
Blood tested and repeatedly negative
Diagnosed by Allergist with elimination diet and diagnosis confirmed by GI in 2002
Misdiagnoses for 15 years were IBS-D, ataxia, migraines, anxiety, depression, fibromyalgia, parathesias, arthritis, livedo reticularis, hairloss, premature menopause, osteoporosis, kidney damage, diverticulosis, prediabetes and ulcers, dermatitis herpeformis
All bold resoved or went into remission with proper diagnosis of Celiac November 2002
Some residual nerve damage remains as of 2006- this has continued to resolve after eliminating soy in 2007

Mother died of celiac related cancer at 56
Twin brother died as a result of autoimmune liver destruction at age 15

Children 2 with Ulcers, GERD, Depression, , 1 with DH, 1 with severe growth stunting (male adult 5 feet)both finally diagnosed Celiac through blood testing and 1 with endo 6 months after Mom


Positive to Soy and Casien also Aug 2007

Gluten Sensitivity Gene Test Aug 2007
HLA-DQB1 Molecular analysis, Allele 1 0303

HLA-DQB1 Molecular analysis, Allele 2 0303

Serologic equivalent: HLA-DQ 3,3 (Subtype 9,9)

#11 MikeOhio

 
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Posted 16 May 2012 - 06:55 PM

Do make sure to ask if they marinate the meat with soy sauce. Regular soy sauce has wheat so you would want to avoid that.

darn, I think you're right about that. I hope I can find something. Thanks for the info.
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#12 Jetamio

 
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Posted 17 May 2012 - 07:39 AM

Aw I'm sorry you had that happen on Mother's Day! I find mixed responses in my family. My daughter has been fantastic about it. My mom is trying to understand it more but won't get tested herself (she has IBS, MS and Fibromyalgia). So far the only real response she gives is a grunt and a "that sucks" when I explain what gluten free means. Hang in there and take care of you!
  • 0
Dairy free since 2010
Gluten free 2/2012 after off the charts positive blood test
Soy and MSG sensitive
Have opted not to biopsy right now.




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