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Always Bring Your Own Food!
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19 posts in this topic

I have been reading about Thanksgiving and noticed that quite a few of us were glutened. I see it all the time here, someone goes to a friend or relative's house and tries to eat gluten-free, but ends up getting glutened, even when the host/hostess really tries to make a gluten-free meal.

WE NEED TO BRING OUR OWN FOOD!

I don't care how embarrassed we feel. (We shouldn't, by the way.) I don't care how many rude comments we get. (They are just that - rude.) People with allergies need to avoid their allergens. People with diabetes need to avoid sugar. People with back problems need to avoid heavy lifting. People with bad hips or knees need to avoid stairs. People who get sun poisoning need to avoid the sun.

So why in the world should we feel strange for needing to avoid gluten? We have a serious disease, and we need to do everything we can to protect our health.

WE NEED TO BRING OUR OWN FOOD!

If it makes you feel conspicuous, you need to gather your strength and put your foot down. This is the way it is. Practice saying it - "This is the way it is. Subject closed." They may talk about you behind your back, but if they do, be assured, people who would do that are ALREADY talking about you behind your back over any number of different things. SO WHAT? Are we supposed to risk our health on the off chance that they will STOP talking behind our backs? Are THEY worth it?

The people who know and love us will understand. If they don't know and love us, we can live without them! In the case of uncaring relatives, hey, we ALL have relatives we wish we didn't, but we put up with them. So put your foot down, bring your own food, put up with the funny looks, but tell them, "This is the way it is - subject closed." They'll either get over it, or they will have the great pleasure of talking behind your back, but it shouldn't affect YOU. YOU are taking care of your health.

So remember:

WE NEED TO BRING OUR OWN FOOD! "This is the way it is. Subject closed."

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Amen!

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Well said and absolutely correct!

My life simplified when my intolerances increased - it was no longer a choice to try to eat gluten-free in other's homes - once the option was gone it really was a big relief. I now know how to let my host/hostess know that I'll bring my own for all situations.

There is no reason removing gluten is not enough of a reason to BYO if it reduces stress in your life.

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Well said bartful, well said! A big round of applause for that!

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Yep I had a fabulous Thanksgiving and thought it would be awkward or appear rude bringing my own food but everyone acted understanding about it. It was great! You are 100% correct because it is our own bodies, we are the ones that are responsible for our actions. They dont have our bodies and dont know what we go through or have the medical knowledge to address it. I am pretty sure people in my family think I am strange but idc they love me and I wont hold their ignorance against them.

Honestly, I think it sometimes makes other people feel better about themselves for their own lack of responsibility to paint us as extremists. I think some of it is jealousy for the people around me, because I lost a lot of weight. When they are dieting it is like, "oh US dieters". I always say that I am not dieting, as long as I dont eat gluten or corn, I lose weight. I just love to rub it in and enforce the fact that i have food sensitivities im not trying to get skinny or just cut out something that makes me have a little tummy ache. Grr

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Thank you for posting that.

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Oh Bartful! You said a mouthful of truth in what you said! We *must* bring our own food to survive! Great Mantra for us all to remember! Thank you! :) :)

How are you? Last time I heard, you were having a hard time :ph34r: I hope you are feeling better??? (See emoticon with my fingers crossed hoping you are feeling better!) :D

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Point needed. I learned that eating my own was "My preference" yesterday. I don't consider it a preference, but a necessity.

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Great post! I find it hard because mine is not celiac disease, but I do react to several substances (and several doctors agree with that). So people don't really take that seriously.

I think some of it is jealousy for the people around me, because I lost a lot of weight. When they are dieting it is like, "oh US dieters". I always say that I am not dieting, as long as I dont eat gluten or corn, I lose weight. I just love to rub it in and enforce the fact that i have food sensitivities im not trying to get skinny or just cut out something that makes me have a little tummy ache. Grr

Amen!!!! I get that all the time. "Oh, you're one of THOSE non-starchy people..." Well, uh, thanks for reminding me how much I miss baking since my doctor decided I have to be grain-free at least for a while. Or would you rather me give you an in-depth description of what will happen in your toilet bowl if I eat outside my doctor's plans? I think the rude people are only those who feel that out taking care of ourselves somehow "judges" their *not* taking care of their eating habits.

But I am getting better, thanks to this board: when a random date asked me why I refused to share his chocolate, I laughingly explained that soy lechitin makes me so hyper that scream at people (sad, but true), and I'd rather avoid that on a first date... :P

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And truly don't you think it takes a weight off of the host or hostess of the dinner that they don't have to try to make something "special" just for us ?

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I totally agree here. I recently started gluten-free last month and am noticing a huge improvement in my life. I aso just found this board, it is such a great resource. I will bring my own food when going places, and won't apologize for it. it's my health and if I don't take charge, I will suffer. there is no choice

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The 2 things I learned when I was diagnosed (at 20 months old), so really the 2 things my mom taught me when I was young are

1. never be too nice

2. always carry rice cakes

I'm 22 now, I still have a bag of ricecakes in every bag I have, along with a protein bar and such for the moments where I don't feel comfortable eating what is being served.

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The only situation where the bring your own food doesn't work :(:angry: is where you have dinners with special couples (just them alone, not a whole tableful of people) and we used to do this often because hubs can't hear from one end of the table to the other :) . It's rather hard when they are inviting just you!! to dinner and wanting to show off their cooking, and you say WE'll bring our own :lol:

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Mushroom, I would STILL bring my own! I would tell these people that I would really enjoy breaking bread with them, having great conversation over a meal, and spending some time with them. Then I would tell them how sorry I was that I couldn't enjoy their cooking which always smells so good, but they THEY are more important to me than food, and in order to really enjoy their company without worrying about my health, it would be best if I brought my own.

But that's just me.

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Yep, I'd bring my own or invite them to mine :)

Tried an alternative on Saturday, Mr Mindwarp cooked all my food in someone elses kitchen. Guess what?

Always take your own :o

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What I was meaning is, we are both gluten intolerant, so there is no point in trying to cook for either of us, so it becomes more of a one-way street :D

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I'm learning to love being host :)

My cunning plan at Christmas is to get everyone to ours for my 1st gluten-free one.

I know what you mean though, would be nice to accept the odd invitation. Ho hum. Maybe time to contact my local support group for new gluten-free friends. Mr Mindwarp is our baker and pulled off gluten-free eclairs a few weeks back. That's gotta make us popular, right?

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I'm so looking forward to this experience, ha ha!

Almost a few weeks in since Thanksgiving (and only two weeks in prior to that). I had no idea the stigma but will be finding out shortly.

Thanks for the veteran post!

Cali

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    • Just wanted to add, that when my friends or family want to eat at a restaurant that I am not sure about, I bring some snacks and then order a drink.  It is all about the company, not the food.  
    • Based on the information you have posted today, the most likely probable reason for your being ill is that you are getting glutened!  Here is a biggie....does your hubby brush his teeth prior to kissing you?  Seriously, it can happen, but going out to eat a lot.....that can be just as bad!  We eat at restaurants that have been approved by celiacs (websites).  Just because that offer a gluten free menu does not mean that they understand about cross contamination.  
    • I got glutened last summer.  Heck, I do not even know what glutened me, but I suspect two products that my gluten-free hubby never consumed (he is my canary).  My symptoms were so different from when I was diagnosed (just had anemia then).  My GI thought I had SIBO or something else, but I asked for a celiac panel.  Yep, I had been Glutened!  Took me three months to recover and another three to regain lost weight.  Yeah, I picked up another health issue on the way (hives, rashes, swelling, itching, ab pain, vomiting, and fainting.)   I did not eat out for one year!  Only this summer, I did.  Was it worth the risk?  You bet!  Three weeks in Europe.  Fortunately,  7 days was on a cruise and Celebrity did a great job.  Italy was so celiac-savvy and I did my research and found places recommended by other celiacs in Spain, France and Poland.  If not, we bought cold food at the market and had a picnic.   I am home.  Will I eat out?  Probably not.  I have a busy Fall ahead of me (High School....football, marching band, volunteer positions, house projects, and work).  I can not afford to be sick.   Ah, I will eat out this Thanksgiving break.  My favorite restaurant is 100% gluten free in Tucson, AZ.   Maybe I will discover another gluten-free restaurant closer to home! 
    • I do est out occasionally - but not indiscriminately.  I am careful to choose places that under stand gluten free.  And places that the food is naturally gluten-free, helps, too.  Celiacs can't just eat something that should be gluten-free and hope it is.  We have to use some common sense and ask questions.  
    • You are right that the next step is an endoscopy, which still is the "gold standard" in diagnosing celiac disease.   However, for various reasons the endoscopy is not done because financial contraints  or long wait times (up to a year!), or too ill to proceed.   You have two positives.  You only need one positive to move forward.    The TTg tests  do not need to be positive for a diagnosis (which requires a positive on an antibodies test which you had and an endoscopy).  My TTg tests were negative and I only had a positive on the DGP IGA, yet biopsies revealed a Marsh Stage IIIB (moderate to severe damage. http://www.cureceliacdisease.org/screening/ Unless your PCP is a celiac expert (unlikely), I would insist on a GI consult.   Please find one who is celiac-savvy.   keep eating gluten daily until all testing is complete (biopsies done).  You never know if lab results are going to get lost.  Besides any celiac testing requires the patient to be on a gluten diet.  In the meantime, keep on researching.  Only YOU can be your best health advocate!  
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