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Member Since 25 Jun 2009
Offline Last Active Today, 06:44 PM

#724375 Struggling :(

Posted by on 20 August 2011 - 08:54 PM

I'm sorry you are having so much trouble. I agree that those "friends" aren't. One thing to keep in mind with your drinking is that alcohol itself is a depressant. While it may make you feel better in the short term, it can make you feel worse later. Then you end up wanting to drink more to get that feeling back, but it once again leads you to feeling worse (more depressed).

I know you said that you went to a counselor before, but it might be good to go back again. There are different stages of acceptance/grief, and you can go back and forth between them. It sounds like you could use some more support right now.
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#723925 Sad And Angry

Posted by on 18 August 2011 - 09:26 PM

If you want to get your family tested (and they suggest all first degree relatives be tested) it needs to be before they go gluten free. If they go gluten free then the test will be inconclusive. The tests are already sometimes give false negatives, but it wont be able to be positive if they aren't eating gluten.

I totally understand the ups and downs. It took me a while after I was finally diagnosed to really accept what had happened. Even though the testing process took six months for me. It was like I couldn't stop thinking about it.

As to the doctor's training. I talked to a friend of mine who just got out of medical school, and she was like "yeah, celiac, a disease that kids get and leads to failure to thrive." That was the only context that she knew about it in. Not that it could develop in adulthood. Yikes.
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#703834 I Can't Stop Blathering On

Posted by on 30 May 2011 - 07:51 AM

SIGH.....I did it again. I went to a BBQ with complete intent to not go on and on and on about my wheat allergy and dietary needs....yet, I did it again. I believe I saw the glazed look in my hosts eyes once. It's so hard not to talk about it, because it encompasses every aspect of our lives. How do you guys control yourselves? I want to, but it comes out anyway, like word vomit...Help...so upset with myself....I don't want to be known for being a bore......

Have you been recently diagnosed? When was first diagnosed (and the time between the tests) it seemed like I could not stop talking about what I learned about celiac and what I could and couldn't eat. But I found that over time this decreased. As it became more of a normal part of my life and something I adjusted to, I didn't feel the need to talk about it all the time. I think part of the reason I talked about it so much at the beginning was that I was always thinking about it. I was thinking about it, and what i was learning, and how it would change my life. So that is what came out of my mouth. I tried to slow down before I talked and think about if I was talking about food. If I was thinking about food, then I purposefully picked another topic to talk about. That helped me reduce my verbal vomit.
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#675242 Yay For Me

Posted by on 14 February 2011 - 02:05 PM

I had an appointment today (after a year and a half at school) with dissability services. I went in once before but the guy somewhat wigged me out and worry about backlash from my profs. The person I talked to today was great and seemed to know about celiac and cc and everything. She was really nice and talked to me about what it has been like for me w/ celiac, and how hard it is to be a student and to deal with this. Also about why I didn't register before and my problems I'm having with my department. Also we planned out how to deal with it when I have my practicum. It was really helpful and the person was sooooo nice. We are meeting again in 1.5 months to see how everything is going. Yay for me.
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#664382 Amusing Anecdote

Posted by on 31 December 2010 - 08:33 AM

I was flying for the holidays and was offered a complimentary soda and food. I got the soda and then the flight attendant asked me if I wanted any food. I said no. He then said "it's complimentary". I was like, 'I'm allergic'. He asked "to everything?" (they had pretzels, cookies, peanuts and something else I can't remember.) I responded "to wheat, rye, and barley." He was like "oh, that must suck." I laughed and was like "yep." He gave my food to my seat mate. He was really nice. I think he just didn't want me to miss out. It made me smile.
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#664379 Wishing A Cc Free Christmas!

Posted by on 31 December 2010 - 08:21 AM

I survived my Christmas trip. I ate out at more restaurants than I have eaten out at since I was diagnosed. My family's dinner was naturally gluten free until the pie came out. (they made a custard for me.) It was really great that everyone was careful to make sure that I didn't get sick. Yay.
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#653428 I Survived My Trip

Posted by on 14 November 2010 - 04:59 PM

I had my first real trip since I was diagnosed. I survived it well (except for getting the Flu on the trip). I was gone for five days. I went to a conference in Canada. I brought all my food that I ate while I was there. My lab went out for dinner, but we ended up at a pub and I didn't trust the food to be gluten free as the server was taking orders without writing them down (I know an arbitrary way to decide, but it just made me feel worried about my safety.) The trip was good and while I didn't eat healthy (as in getting fruits and veggies etc) I did have a good trip without having to worry about getting sick.
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#634464 Grief

Posted by on 24 August 2010 - 10:22 PM

When people respond with "well it could be worse" it makes me angry. It makes me feel invalidated. It makes me feel that my feelings don't matter. I'm sorry that person X suffered from disease Y. That sucks. But that doesn't mean that my distress is any less. And this just comes on top of my other health issues. It just happens to be the newest one. The one I can't hide from others since so much stuff surrounds food. Or food surrounds so much stuff. I'm told I can vent and that people understand. But then I'm also told to just 'suck it up' because it could be worse. I try to reach out for support from people who have been there too. But I feel like I'm getting my hand slapped for asking for help. Yes some people are further along in the acceptance process. And I feel like I have back slid in that process. I was dealing with it really well for a while. Now I just want to hide from the world.
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#634403 Grief

Posted by on 24 August 2010 - 04:54 PM

Thank you everyone for listening to me scream. I know this could be worse. And I was doing quite well for a while. But this has all just popped up again. I even wen tout to eat at a restaurant with friends for the first time. But I think this conference is terrifying me. I don't want to end up sick in another country. Ugh.
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#631276 Angry

Posted by on 12 August 2010 - 08:05 PM

The problem was that it wasn't written up specifically as a food issue, but when I asked what they were referring to in one section, that was what they said they were referring to. Yes I was anxious when I was talking to them about it. It was the first time I had to ask about food. So I was nervous about asking. Every time it comes up it makes me angry all over again. I feel like I should be able to get over it, but I can't seem to. They did eventually tell me what and where they were ordering from, but they asked like I was being ridiculous to ask.
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#631268 Angry

Posted by on 12 August 2010 - 07:23 PM

I am angry. So angry. This happened a little more than a year ago now (about two months after I was diagnosed). I moved to graduate school and they had a welcoming lunch for the new students. I asked them where they were getting their food from and what they were getting making it clear that I just wanted to check and see if any of the food would be safe for me to eat. But all I got was the run around on that they couldn't give me the information and it was too complicated for them to figure this out. I was then later told by my adviser that it was too hard for them to "figure out everyone's dietary needs." I really don't think that my request of where and what they were ordering was too much. I wasn't asking them to change anything they were ordering. Just to let me know. I didn't know how hard to push the issue as I didn't want to stand out as the one who wanted special treatment. I didn't register for disability services because I didn't want to piss off people in the department. Where then they would have to provide me food I could eat at department functions. But their response that I was acting inappropriately by asking these questions makes me furious. That they felt it was necessary to reference my anxiety about the whole 'food issue' in my yearly review and put it in my permanent record makes me even angrier.
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