Well, it's easier than you think. It's harder than you think.
If you're the main cook, it's easier. If they are picky, well, pick your battles.
I keep a few gluten things around like a loaf of bread, tortillas, and some instant soups and pastas. I get heevy-jeevy when they come out. Like now, my son is home sick (turned out to be allergies so he's really not) and has cooked two pots of ramen. He's 9. You can imagine the mess in my kitchen. Wheat by-products everywhere.
I'll be looking for a gluten-free version, goes without saying.
So far my guys are ok eating gluten-free pasta, and my son isn't big on bread. DH gets his fix at business lunches, dinners.
At first my son rolled his eyes at the gluten thing, but after eating gluten-free cake, ice cream, etc. hes fine at home. I let him have his fixes at school, when were out...
I tried my son on almond milk (he had dairy issues as a baby) and that was a flop. It'll be bad if he's gluten intolerant and dairy intolerant.
I just cook with whole foods. It's easy to find condiment replacements, pasta replacements. Desserts are easy - use mixes don't try baking on your own in the beginning (and I was a scratch baker). Breads are available, but taste like crap - stick with crackers. I made a loaf of bread - king arthur mix - and it was decent.
Eating out is tough. Carry gluten-free energy bars with you for emergencies. I haven't mastered eating out so I don't have a lot of advice there.
All you can do is try, if you haven't been tested get the testing done before you go gluten-free (if you can stand staying on the gluten) since going gluten-free interferes with antibody bloodwork and biopsies. Won't matter for genetic testing or stool samples.
Well, this is rather interesting since I'm one of those baking and cooking madwomen. However, my ex sister-in-law was dairy intolerant and I (and my mother) tried to accommodate her and she was quite grateful. We just tried to be honest about the ingredients and she would suggest alterations or she just wouldn't eat that particular thing. All in all, it worked out.
But now I'm the Celiac and I am also the only female left with potentially 7 guys to feed at gatherings... and you bet your patootie I'll make gluten free stuff. Luckily, none of them are picky. However, I can imagine the mess I'd be in if my MIL was still alive and cooking (she loved processed foods but was also a great scratch cooker).
Here's my advice. As you already know, the point with all the cooking isn't just the food, its the gathering. So gather. But take your own food (prepacked in a cooler), and take something to share that is naturally gluten free. If its naturally gluten free they won't notice a "change".
Put your happy face on, try to stay out of the wheat areas, and try to keep your plate, utensils, etc. away from kids. Take your own if you need to. Get fresh air while you're there.... go outside, walk the dog, run to the store, set the table. Participate but stay away from the actual cooking. AND TAKE PLASTIC GLOVES FOR WASHING DISHES.
You are going to have to be the one to gracefully set the example. So keep your chin up, plaster a smile on your face, and do what you need to do.
If you go on family vacations, insist on your own cabin and take your own food. Have your recipes ready to cook the most naturally gluten-free and easy foods you can and show them how easy it can be. Show them you can participate in the family without eating the food.
I'm crossing my fingers it will work for you!
Now, if I can figure out how to get through the work BBQ tomorrow. Ugh.