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The Funny Pages - Tickle Me Elbow - The Original


TriticusToxicum

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DingoGirl Enthusiast
Am over the moon to see Soozle Woozle posting :D

Waiting patiently fer part deux......

Padt :wub:

part deux is about me health woes, and exhaustion :(:(:( and how much I dislike my doctor, whom I once liked - when I went to him three summers ago for my back pain. (he is quite good at that, but distinctly intolerant of anything to do with exhaustion, weeping, weakness, or anything that remotely looks, smells, or hints of depression :angry: )

part three is about my technological meltdowns and EVERYTHING breaking all at once :angry:

:wacko:

but today, I have a bit of energy, so must mow the lawn, walk the Weezel, clean the house, get food for bow-legged kitteh :wub: who talks and talks and purrs and talks all morning when he's outside :lol: and inside :wub:

then turns mean and psycho, and attacks both of us :unsure:

kittehs :huh::lol::wub:


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DingoGirl Enthusiast
The TV thing.......mine died a couple of months ago (no picture)...turned out it needed a whole new mother f***in' board :blink:

this gave me an out-loud snort :lol: :lol:

Alas, this GIGANTIC tv - one of the original big screens (weighs about - 2,000 pounds - I swear) was traded for my piano, about three years ago. 'tis NOT a flat screen, by any means - but an outstanding television. No problems ever. I think it's about 8 or 9 years old. So - just now, I turned it on again, fiddled with some stuff, and the picture was back on. :blink: I'm going to lay hands on it and pray over it :lol:

except that maybe God is punishing me for watching too much cable:ph34r:

jerseyangel Proficient
except that maybe God is punishing me for watching too much cable:ph34r:

Nah--can't be that or I'd be in some dire straights :o:P

Poo poo ca-ca on yer doctor :angry:

Mtndog Collaborator

Suzzle's posting :D :D - oh wait so am I?!?!

Suzzle- wilt thou mowest our lawn too? I shall give you a magnesium, Vitamin C , electrolyte, Vitamin D infused strawberry margarita with a spoonful o'sugar to help the medicine go down! Our mower is still under a tree (our landlord is slow, slow, slow. Everyone has their stuff done a week ago. We still have a crushed backyard!

For the record, I don't like your doctor anymore either!

The Ripper is doing ESKIMO ROLLS! So cool but....my immediate thought is panic- just like you Emily! The J's- yes- get that Ripper earplugs!

Sophie is so cute at the drive-thru but that retainer loss- gawd they cost like $1000. My best friend's mom drove from CT to NY (45 minutes or so) to pick up one she had left at a bagelry and THAT was in 1983!

Maybe we should all become orthodontists!

Hi Ptaum- sorry I missed yer post.

I love our Leesa and Gian-knit together too- Is Gianknit is the one who has met the most of us?

At this point I'd go anywhere to meet up with all of you!

Exploring statistics opens you up to a whole knew realm of really lame jokes:

A statistician's wife had twins. He was delighted. He rang the minister who was also delighted. "Bring them to church on Sunday and we'll baptize them," said the minister. "No," replied the statistician. "Baptize one. We'll keep the other as a control."

Jess :lol: :lol: :lol: It was your stats joke that got me on here because yesterday I was trying to explain to Kurt how, out of a sample size of less than 100,000, they can predict that the chance of something occurring is 1 in 100,000 because of multiple regression and HARUMPH-

HE DIDN"T GET IT!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! :angry: :angry: :lol: :lol:

I am going to a completely gluten-free bakery this weekend that does breakfast, lunch and pastries!

Oh- and some good news for a change- I is officially a working teacher again :D :D

JNBunnie1 Community Regular
I am going to a completely gluten-free bakery this weekend that does breakfast, lunch and pastries!

Oh- and some good news for a change- I is officially a working teacher again :D :D

Where, pray tell, is this storied bakery?!?!

Good for you workin!

Darn210 Enthusiast
The TV thing.......mine died a couple of months ago (no picture)...turned out it needed a whole new mother f***in' board :blink:

:lol::lol::lol: I'm nominating this quote for the best use of the strikethrough feature!!!! . . . which I'm sure I've mentioned before is me favoUrite!!!

Poo poo ca-ca on yer doctor :angry:

Patti said *Poo poo ca-ca*

:lol::lol:

Oh- and some good news for a change- I is officially a working teacher again :D :D

That's Fan*Parking*Tastic!!!!

Great to see you Suze!!! Twas cleaning the desk today and came across yer pic of you and yer dingoes . . . :wub:

Hey Tom . . . <wave>

nikki-uk Enthusiast
Great to see you Suze!!! Twas cleaning the desk today and came across yer pic of you and yer dingoes . . . :wub:

Just flew through this sentence ... and thought ..'Awww' ♥...... but wait! :unsure: ...... you were cleaning the desk!!!!!!!!!!!?!?!

Please stop doing that Gian-kneatt!!!....making me pheel all inferiorally <made up wordage?>unclean

:lol:

(thanks for the nomination though ;):lol: )


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elye Community Regular
...get food for bow-legged kitteh who talks and talks and purrs and talks all morning when he's outside :lol: and inside :wub:

Sooooozle! Mygawd, I could swear you're talking about Jack right here.. . . . ..... :huh:

:lol:

The Ripper is doing ESKIMO ROLLS!

Ah, ah. ......must be SOooOooOOo careful....they are now referred to as Inuit Rolls .. . .. .... <_<:rolleyes:

Jess.....It was your stats joke that got me on here because yesterday I was trying to explain to Kurt how, out of a sample size of less than 100,000, they can predict that the chance of something occurring is 1 in 100,000 because of multiple regression and HARUMPH-

HE DIDN"T GET IT!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! :angry::angry::lol::lol:

Um..... . ....... :unsure: .. . .I kinda, like, uh.. . . . . . . . . .........don't get it, either. . .. ....... :wacko:

:rolleyes:

Bevel's teaching, again!! :):) Those lucky stooooodents. . . . ......

Jestgar Rising Star
Um..... . ....... :unsure: .. . .I kinda, like, uh.. . . . . . . . . .........don't get it, either. . .. ....... :wacko:

:rolleyes:

Bevel's teaching, again!! :):) Those lucky stooooodents. . . . ......

If you take a large enough random sampling you have a good chance of having the answer within your sample. For example, if we poll 6 boys in a camp cabin, and discover that all have names that start with J, we can conclude that either:

a- every boys name at that camp begins with J or,

b- six isn't a very big sample...

DingoGirl Enthusiast
Poo poo ca-ca on yer doctor :angry:

a$$hole-osity!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! :angry::lol: <and a shout-out to Ptaum :lol: >

Suzzle's posting - oh wait so am I?!?!

Suzzle- wilt thou mowest our lawn too? I shall give you a magnesium, Vitamin C , electrolyte, Vitamin D infused strawberry margarita with a spoonful o'sugar to help the medicine go down!

Be out soon, Bevel B)

Jess It was your stats joke that got me on here because yesterday I was trying to explain to Kurt how, out of a sample size of less than 100,000, they can predict that the chance of something occurring is 1 in 100,000 because of multiple regression and HARUMPH-

HE DIDN"T GET IT!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

:unsure: um, I don't get it either :lol:

Great to see you Suze!!! Twas cleaning the desk today and came across yer pic of you and yer dingoes . . . :wub:

:( We (well, two of us) were the picture of health back then....feeling robust and fabulous. I was complaining about my hair at that time....it's not even THAT good any more.....declining and turning more middle-age-ish all the time

HARR-RUMMPHHHFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFF

Just flew through this sentence ... and thought ..'Awww' ♥...... but wait! :unsure: ...... you were cleaning the desk!!!!!!!!!!!?!?!

I know.....WIH?

I did give Weez a bath outside today - rather proud of self - she was accused -- PHALSELY - of pharting last night. <_< Gail stood up for her and said, "no, she just stinks." :lol:

<Weezee is virtually a gas-less, phart-less dog, nearly 100 percent of the time>

Sooooozle! Mygawd, I could swear you're talking about Jack right here.. . . . .....

purring, talking, chirping all morning? :lol:

inuit rolls :lol: :lol:

another small, Mexican hispanic man found me attractive again :huh: <managed to pull it together about two weeks ago, when I actually - GASP - went out >

I was inquiring as to his nationality, as he had grown up in a small farming town around here:

(and somehow I feel as though I've told you guys this story before? :wacko: )

"Portugese?"

"no....."

"Italian?"

"nooooo..."

then, before leaving, after politely but firmly telling him I would NEVER call him, I asked him what was this scary thing on a chain 'round his neck - 'twas a mayan calendar.

"oh! You're.....South American? Mexican? Mayan? Incan?"

...a slow but distinct vague-ness fell upon us......"Hispanic," was the answer. His last name was Ruiz. You guys can figger it out. :lol:

Mexicans in California do NOT like to be called Mexican....as a general rule. :blink:

Geoss's diet water - what in hell :lol: *snort*

jerseyangel Proficient
If you take a large enough random sampling you have a good chance of having the answer within your sample. For example, if we poll 6 boys in a camp cabin, and discover that all have names that start with J, we can conclude that either:

a- every boys name at that camp begins with J or,

b- six isn't a very big sample...

:blink::blink:

Now stop that the two of youse! The scientist and the teacher.......Me pea brain can not comprehend :lol:

:lol: Poor Weezie phalsely accused of pharting :lol:

curlyfries Contributor

part three is about my technological meltdowns and EVERYTHING breaking all at once :angry:

I feel yer pain, Souzle. <_<

Our furnace broke down on DD while we were in Houston.

The toaster oven went some time before that.

Air conditioner last week.

....and the microwave occassionally becomes posessed.......runs when it's not set.....or set the time and it acts like it's running, but it's not. Once I show it who's boss, it straightens up for a while!

jerseyangel Proficient
Geoss's diet water - what in hell :lol: *snort*

Gave me a chortle this mornin' :P

Look at all the sillies on right now :wub:

Jestgar Rising Star
Look at all the sillies on right now :wub:

all waitin' for someone else to say sump'n funny....

jerseyangel Proficient
all waitin' for someone else to say sump'n funny....

<snort> Phunny cause it's true :lol:

curlyfries Contributor
If you take a large enough random sampling you have a good chance of having the answer within your sample. For example, if we poll 6 boys in a camp cabin, and discover that all have names that start with J, we can conclude that either:

a- every boys name at that camp begins with J or,

b- six isn't a very big sample...

Oooh, oooh.........I know this one!

.....It's B! :P

another small, Mexican hispanic man found me attractive again :huh: <managed to pull it together about two weeks ago, when I actually - GASP - went out >

Mexicans in California do NOT like to be called Mexican....as a general rule. :blink:

I was hit on the other day by a Mexican Hispanic guy on my way into the grocery store. I think they, in general have more balls less inhibitions!

....and don't ever call a Puerto Rican, Mexican!

I had a Costa Rican pharmacist friend who went to a family-run Mexican restaurant and ordered in Spanish. She overheard them saying that "She doesn't speak very good Spanish." :rolleyes:

curlyfries Contributor
all waitin' for someone else to say sump'n funny....

It's what keeps me going!

my favorite place to be :wub:

elye Community Regular
If you take a large enough random sampling you have a good chance of having the answer within your sample. For example, if we poll 6 boys in a camp cabin, and discover that all have names that start with J, we can conclude that either:

a- every boys name at that camp begins with J or,

b- six isn't a very big sample...

Gah! Get it now! :rolleyes::rolleyes:

What if one of them is combing his rank, curly hair straight up to falsely affect/skew random test results? :lol:

<Weezee is virtually a gas-less, phart-less dog, nearly 100 percent of the time>

Dear gawd, Gus makes up fer Weezie's lost time... . . . ..pharts every time he sits down.... .....Elsie stares in wonder at his backside, head cocked. . . . ....

:lol:

Darn210 Enthusiast
Elsie stares in wonder at his backside, head cocked. . . . ....

. . . love the dog-tilted-head-WIH-quizzicle look

Weeze didn't phart . . . she just stinks . . . :lol::lol::lol:

When Smackl (and Smickl?) were born, the air conditioner, hot water heater, microwave and dishwasher all went out within a four week time frame . . . all items verrrrrry important to a sleep deprived mutterer mother.

jerseyangel Proficient

jeepers christmas :angry: Every time I try to read a new post, I get the "flood" board message.

Make it stop :P

elye Community Regular
Dear gawd, Gus makes up fer Weezie's lost time... . . . ..pharts every time he sits down.... .....Elsie stares in wonder at his backside, head cocked. . . . ....

:lol:

Gawd, just realized..... . ...I wonder if I ever do this when DH pharts as he's sitting down? :huh:

:lol:

jerseyangel Proficient
Gawd, just realized..... . ...I wonder if I ever do this when DH pharts as he's sitting down? :huh:

When you think about it, that's probably where Elsie learned it :lol:

Jestgar Rising Star
When you think about it, that's probably where Elsie learned it :lol:

:lol: :lol: :lol: :lol:

elye Community Regular

G'Morning, All Psillies!

Have been thinking much about Rayechull and Tareeesuh lately.........we hardly see them here now. :( Whassup?

And Joooolie, too. Miss them all.. . . . ......

Jooodie! When is your move date? Have you heard from Middle-aged-grieving-SOoOOo-ready-for-another-cat Lady?

....And Bevel is madly preparing course content right now, methinks....... .. :)

Ho hum. I apparently have gotten myself a stress fracture, involving the second and third metatarsil on the top of my foot. Happened suddenly during a step class ten days ago - - felt sudden, real pain as I was doing my jumping around.......only a matter of time. Too much pounding and punishing overuse through the years. :angry:

Been hobbling around, icing.....finally had Xrays done, and there it was. An OLD, healed stress fracture (didn't know 'bout this!) that has perhaps been re-aggravated, or a new one cracked in there.

Again, :angry::angry: .

Soooo, been in the pool. Do not like this.

And OMG.....pulled out the crutches we have stored in the basement, and suddenly remembered that should something happen to one of the crutch-tips - - well, we all know - - I have a spare. It's ALL GOOD! B):lol:

jerseyangel Proficient

Ouch Em--take care o'that phoot! Good thing you have that extra crutch tip--you never know when sumphin like that is gonna come in handy ;)

I miss the missing sillies too :(

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