• Ads by Google:
     




    Get email alerts Subscribe to Celiac.com's FREE weekly eNewsletter

    Ads by Google:



       Get email alertsSubscribe to Celiac.com's FREE weekly eNewsletter

  • Announcements

    • admin

      Frequently Asked Questions About Celiac Disease   09/30/2015

      This Celiac.com FAQ on celiac disease will guide you to all of the basic information you will need to know about the disease, its diagnosis, testing methods, a gluten-free diet, etc.   Subscribe to Celiac.com's FREE weekly eNewsletter   What are the major symptoms of celiac disease? Celiac Disease Symptoms What testing is available for celiac disease? - list blood tests, endo with biopsy, genetic test and enterolab (not diagnostic) Celiac Disease Screening Interpretation of Celiac Disease Blood Test Results Can I be tested even though I am eating gluten free? How long must gluten be taken for the serological tests to be meaningful? The Gluten-Free Diet 101 - A Beginner's Guide to Going Gluten-Free Is celiac inherited? Should my children be tested? Ten Facts About Celiac Disease Genetic Testing Is there a link between celiac and other autoimmune diseases? Celiac Disease Research: Associated Diseases and Disorders Is there a list of gluten foods to avoid? Unsafe Gluten-Free Food List (Unsafe Ingredients) Is there a list of gluten free foods? Safe Gluten-Free Food List (Safe Ingredients) Gluten-Free Alcoholic Beverages Distilled Spirits (Grain Alcohols) and Vinegar: Are they Gluten-Free? Where does gluten hide? Additional Things to Beware of to Maintain a 100% Gluten-Free Diet What if my doctor won't listen to me? An Open Letter to Skeptical Health Care Practitioners Gluten-Free recipes: Gluten-Free Recipes

Question For Magpie (And Anyone Else..)
0

Rate this topic

9 posts in this topic

Recommended Posts

I didn't want to hijack that other thread (about the problem with MIL) -- but Magpie said that her MIL had been caught rubbing seafood on her plate at a restaurant. sheesh... because she thought Magpie was ruining her evening out. Um... I'm trying to figure out how not eating seafood would "ruin" MIL's meal? Can't each person eat whatever they want? If I choose to have steak and one person eats shrimp and another eats clams and a fourth eats ravioli -- well, who cares? amazing... There really are some messed up people in this world.

(and, the seafood thing is really bad, because that's an actual allergy, isn't it? like serious anaphylactic (or however you spell that) shock?)

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites
Ads by Google:
Ads by Google:


I didn't want to hijack that other thread (about the problem with MIL) -- but Magpie said that her MIL had been caught rubbing seafood on her plate at a restaurant. sheesh... because she thought Magpie was ruining her evening out. Um... I'm trying to figure out how not eating seafood would "ruin" MIL's meal? Can't each person eat whatever they want? If I choose to have steak and one person eats shrimp and another eats clams and a fourth eats ravioli -- well, who cares? amazing... There really are some messed up people in this world.

(and, the seafood thing is really bad, because that's an actual allergy, isn't it? like serious anaphylactic (or however you spell that) shock?)

It's a simple enough answer, hon. At least in my case.

My mother in law is absolutely, 100%, completely cracked.

It started, I think, simply from the sad fact she is also quite possibly the stupidest person wandering the planet (not being a b... brat here. That is her son's view. She is addicted to prescription pain killers since the age of 22 and it's addled the brain pan more than a tad. Now in her late 60's, this 4 foot 6 inches tall woman uses enough oxy, darvacet, and duragesic pain patches to fell a water buffalo on a daily basis.).

She likes shrimp - ergo, everyone on the planet must like shrimp. And if they refrain... well. They are just being silly. The first year of dating my husband was filled with meals where she would try to shove one into my mouth, drop one onto my plate, etc... all the while insisting "Just try one. Why be so difficult?" She really honestly could not GRASP it would kill me. She "forgot".

After a year of dating though... it got more intense. I think because she was finally realizing, I wasn't going to go away. My (now) husband had taken over the role of caregiver to his two rather.... self absorbed parents from a young age (he is an only child and adopted) - even to the extent of paying for a large portion of their home. Her belief that he was going to be her whipping boy for eternity was... starting to shake. From there - DEMANDS of weekly (I got it finally DOWN to weekly. The woman has never cooked a day in her life, and before I came along, they all trooped out to eat 3-5x a week.) "family" meals became the nagging norm.

All at seafood restaurants.

I was okay for a while, but the bad thing with shellfish allergies... there comes a tipping point where your body goes from "this is gonna SUCK for a bit." to "No. No more. Game over." Her son had just explained (as I rushed to the bathroom to down an entire bottle of children's benedryl because the whole breathing thing was becoming a serious issue) that we could no longer attend these meals. Too dangerous for me, if she wanted to see us, it was going to have to be somewhere else. It wasn't enough to just not order shellfish at Red Lobster, the fact it was all cooked on the same grills, in the same pans, with thousands of pounds of shellfish each week aerosolizing into the air was making just walking INTO the restaurant dangerous. I'd go red, start to itch, and breathing would become a real issue if I stayed too long.

15 minutes later, when I was out in the bathroom again - she pulled the shrimp trick. She claims it was to prove I wasn't allergic... the emergency bolt to the ER with my husband proved otherwise.

It's not so bad these days - and we have drastically cut back contact (her recent bout with cancer sadly dragged us back in for a while) and my husband stands firmly by me. The resulting battle of "I have no problem having you charged with attempted murder you self-centered psycho she beast" shocked her into quietness, at least for a bit.

Ultimately - I know not to trust her. I know how to manage her. And I have my husband backing me up. Added light spot is the fact every member of her family - her own husband on to her sister - have all said regarding the future and any kids we might have "Oh, of course you can never leave them around her. That would be deadly!" So I won't have to fight that battle alone when/if the time comes.

On the other hand... maybe I'll luck out and she'll just die before that happens. (Yeah. I know. Harsh. But after 7 years... heartfelt too.)

Sorry about the novel... it's a thing I've been dealing with for a while (my husband can never never EVER think I don't truly love him. I knew his mom was this crazy and I STILL married him. Granted... I made him show me his adoption papers first - because those genes just need to STOP.) and it can be a bit.... itchy to talk about. On the upside... beyond stunned horror and a serious desire to do the woman harm, my mom has been taken out to eat for years by her friends for stories of this nutjob. No one really believes... and than they meet her. In the abstract, it can be entertaining as hell. I figure one day I'll write one heck of a book about this! :P

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

Oh Magpie! I believe you fully! I could write and write and write and still not be complete with the stories of my own mother!

You keep remembering how very much your hubby loves you to stand up FOR you! Not everyone has that amazing of a spouse!

In turn yes you too are an amazing person to put up with it and stand by your hubby!

Good for you! I applaud you for standing your ground! It's hard I know. I have been standing my ground with my own mother for so many years and only the last few the rest of the family is "getting" it.

Allergies are real. Pain is real and NOT breathing is REAL! I have the same reaction to 3 things: sweet potatoes, strawberries and fresh ginger. I had to fire a friend once b/c she just kept insisting that I try the sweet potato thingie on the the plate the night we had girls night out. I finally said sure I will as soon as you take me to the ER and I can try it after you get the DR. ready to help me when I can't breathe.

SOME people! ARRRRGGGHH!!

It's a simple enough answer, hon. At least in my case.

My mother in law is absolutely, 100%, completely cracked.

It started, I think, simply from the sad fact she is also quite possibly the stupidest person wandering the planet (not being a b... brat here. That is her son's view. She is addicted to prescription pain killers since the age of 22 and it's addled the brain pan more than a tad. Now in her late 60's, this 4 foot 6 inches tall woman uses enough oxy, darvacet, and duragesic pain patches to fell a water buffalo on a daily basis.).

She likes shrimp - ergo, everyone on the planet must like shrimp. And if they refrain... well. They are just being silly. The first year of dating my husband was filled with meals where she would try to shove one into my mouth, drop one onto my plate, etc... all the while insisting "Just try one. Why be so difficult?" She really honestly could not GRASP it would kill me. She "forgot".

After a year of dating though... it got more intense. I think because she was finally realizing, I wasn't going to go away. My (now) husband had taken over the role of caregiver to his two rather.... self absorbed parents from a young age (he is an only child and adopted) - even to the extent of paying for a large portion of their home. Her belief that he was going to be her whipping boy for eternity was... starting to shake. From there - DEMANDS of weekly (I got it finally DOWN to weekly. The woman has never cooked a day in her life, and before I came along, they all trooped out to eat 3-5x a week.) "family" meals became the nagging norm.

All at seafood restaurants.

I was okay for a while, but the bad thing with shellfish allergies... there comes a tipping point where your body goes from "this is gonna SUCK for a bit." to "No. No more. Game over." Her son had just explained (as I rushed to the bathroom to down an entire bottle of children's benedryl because the whole breathing thing was becoming a serious issue) that we could no longer attend these meals. Too dangerous for me, if she wanted to see us, it was going to have to be somewhere else. It wasn't enough to just not order shellfish at Red Lobster, the fact it was all cooked on the same grills, in the same pans, with thousands of pounds of shellfish each week aerosolizing into the air was making just walking INTO the restaurant dangerous. I'd go red, start to itch, and breathing would become a real issue if I stayed too long.

15 minutes later, when I was out in the bathroom again - she pulled the shrimp trick. She claims it was to prove I wasn't allergic... the emergency bolt to the ER with my husband proved otherwise.

It's not so bad these days - and we have drastically cut back contact (her recent bout with cancer sadly dragged us back in for a while) and my husband stands firmly by me. The resulting battle of "I have no problem having you charged with attempted murder you self-centered psycho she beast" shocked her into quietness, at least for a bit.

Ultimately - I know not to trust her. I know how to manage her. And I have my husband backing me up. Added light spot is the fact every member of her family - her own husband on to her sister - have all said regarding the future and any kids we might have "Oh, of course you can never leave them around her. That would be deadly!" So I won't have to fight that battle alone when/if the time comes.

On the other hand... maybe I'll luck out and she'll just die before that happens. (Yeah. I know. Harsh. But after 7 years... heartfelt too.)

Sorry about the novel... it's a thing I've been dealing with for a while (my husband can never never EVER think I don't truly love him. I knew his mom was this crazy and I STILL married him. Granted... I made him show me his adoption papers first - because those genes just need to STOP.) and it can be a bit.... itchy to talk about. On the upside... beyond stunned horror and a serious desire to do the woman harm, my mom has been taken out to eat for years by her friends for stories of this nutjob. No one really believes... and than they meet her. In the abstract, it can be entertaining as hell. I figure one day I'll write one heck of a book about this! :P

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

Magpie-if you don't write for a living you should try. Your stories are always entertaining and highly engrossing.

I agree. I love reading your posts. I am soooooo happy to hear your Hub is adopted!

My MIL was crazy with a diagnosis. But it was more the sad and inconvenient kind. Not particularly dangerous. Her ex, my FIL, is evil. He can't do anything to us because we limit our exposure to him and he usually only wants to see us if he wants something from us.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites
Ads by Google:


Magpie-if you don't write for a living you should try. Your stories are always entertaining and highly engrossing.

Goodness, I think so too! I love reading your stories :D

But oye....you really do have your hands full with the MIL :(

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

It's a simple enough answer, hon. At least in my case.

My mother in law is absolutely, 100%, completely cracked.

Oh Magpie,

My own mother is toxic too. Seems fishy that nature would allow some people to become parents. Now she's developed dementia to boot, which makes it even more difficult to try to relate to her.

And it's true, you write really well! In the end, your stories are uplifting.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites


Ads by Google:


You might not be able to see it, but you are all making me blush a bit here. :wub:

The writing thing... I'm working on it actually. Starting a new website that should finally get off the ground on Monday (not going to put the link here - I don't want to annoy the powers that be :D . If someone really DOES want to read more of my babblings, drop me a line and I'll email you the address.) and slowly getting things pulled together to see if all the random writing I've done all my life, and the time put in as editor for other writers works out to making a quiet go of it.

But honestly, it sounds like I've actually gotten off lucky in a lot of ways. It's my mother in law that is the issue - a pretty standard position for antagonistic stances. My own family (parents, my husband, my brother and his family) have been incredibly supportive (helped by how MANY folks in both my immediate and extended family have bother allergies and celiac) over food and food safety. Even my friends have been really great - the general (and very sweet) consensus amongst them was "If anyone can make it tasty - it's you!" The first week after my biopsy, I even had 3 couples over for dinner - all champing at the bit to try the "new" foods out. A few nits at my husband's job, a few irritations, but really, nothing but support from the core people in my life. My mother in law? I knew she was nutters when I met her - so I can't be too shocked when she acts true to type.

I don't know if I could have managed if my MOM had acted like that. I don't think it would have broken me (I'm a rather tough bird) but it would have been one heck of a body blow. Same with people I had viewed as close friends - that kind of ignorance and outright nastiness... that just makes my stomach clench to even think about!

There are some VERY strong folks on this board to manage dealing with people like THAT in their lives!

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

Create an account or sign in to comment

You need to be a member in order to leave a comment

Create an account

Sign up for a new account in our community. It's easy!

Register a new account

Sign in

Already have an account? Sign in here.

Sign In Now

0

  • Forum Statistics

    • Total Topics
      108,109
    • Total Posts
      939,715
  • Member Statistics

    • Total Members
      66,093
    • Most Online
      3,093

    Newest Member
    RowdyPope
    Joined
  • Popular Now

  • Topics

  • Posts

    • if you have celiac and you eat gluten, you will feel terrible and do damage to your body.  there isn't any 'morning after' (for lack of a better term) tried and true remedy.  if i am accidently glutened (and i am insanely careful, so this does not happen often anymore) i find that drinking plenty of water and long, hot showers make me feel better, but it doesn't leave until day 14.  14 days.  ain't nobody got time for that.  no matter what i try, it's naps and snacks for 14 days.  then the fog lifts and my guts stop protesting.  you will get better at avoiding gluten and cc by practicing being gluten free.  i would eat whole foods (avoid processed while your guts are healing) and skip eating out for awhile until you get better at knowing how to determine which restaurants are safe and which ones don't give a crap if they give you the craps <see what i did there lolz) go to the coping page and read the newbie thread.  there is much useful info there - more things to avoid than just bread - and ways to navigate this lifestyle.  welcome to your new normal.  pack a lunch, because if ya got celiac, every day's a picnic.  literally. 
    •   My mistake... HUGE Oops... She hasn't been diagnosed with anything as of yet. I couldn't remember the name so I googled and DH came up. Well that was wrong.... it is Keratosis pilaris she has. i just really don't want her to get to 20 years old and finally become allergic to lactose like her father, and continue to gain so much weight that she needs knee replacements, and diabetes,  and depression, and bipolar, and brain fog and dementia beginning at 48 and dead at 50 like my MIL, or like my mother having allergies to soy, egg, now corn and milk too, also a diabetic.... because of all these allergies she's allergic to a lot of antibiotics and much OTC medicine as well Thank you for your advice thus far
    • i was at a meeting recently, where they serve dinner, ironically the meeting is at a communitiy room at our local hospital (where the meal is catered by the hospital cafeteria and i do not eat BECAUSE THEY CAN'T DO GLUTEN FREE.  AT A HOSPITAL.)  but i digress.... 'oh, my doctor told me i have that, too.  i just can't stop eating bread ha ha ha' as she chomps a bite of dinner roll.   worse?  she's a doctor's wife    ya can't fix stupid 
    • If she was actually diagnosed, by a skin biopsy, for DH, then she has Celiac.  NO need for further testing. http://www.cureceliacdisease.org/faq/can-a-skin-biopsy-for-dermatitis-herpetiformis-dh-confirm-celiac-disease-or-is-an-endoscopy-still-needed/  
    • i find that i can tolerate some foods that were off limits to me (soy, certain veggies, ice cream, chocolate, etc) if i do not eat them two days in a row, for whatever reason.  i'm thinking histamines.  whatever it is, i can eat many more/different foods.  i usually eat the same sort of food/meal every 3 days.  i was puzzled why i could eat something one day and be fine.  then eat the same thing the next day and not fine.  seems to be working i thought i had a problem with eggs bc i was eating them nearly every day for breakfast, but if i rotate it with cereal one day, a bagel or waffle or pancakes etc for day 2 then i can have eggs the third day as long as i go back to cereal the next day (for example) i can even tolerate fresh (and frozen lolz) fruit once every 3 days when i thought i couldn't tolerate fruit at all.  so long as i don't eat it tomorrow it's trial and error, and what works for one may not work for another.....  but this seems to be working for me.  right now lolz
  • Upcoming Events