• Ads by Google:
     




    Get email alerts Subscribe to Celiac.com's FREE weekly eNewsletter

    Ads by Google:



       Get email alertsSubscribe to Celiac.com's FREE weekly eNewsletter

  • Announcements

    • admin

      Frequently Asked Questions About Celiac Disease   09/30/2015

      This Celiac.com FAQ on celiac disease will guide you to all of the basic information you will need to know about the disease, its diagnosis, testing methods, a gluten-free diet, etc.   Subscribe to Celiac.com's FREE weekly eNewsletter   What are the major symptoms of celiac disease? Celiac Disease Symptoms What testing is available for celiac disease? - list blood tests, endo with biopsy, genetic test and enterolab (not diagnostic) Celiac Disease Screening Interpretation of Celiac Disease Blood Test Results Can I be tested even though I am eating gluten free? How long must gluten be taken for the serological tests to be meaningful? The Gluten-Free Diet 101 - A Beginner's Guide to Going Gluten-Free Is celiac inherited? Should my children be tested? Ten Facts About Celiac Disease Genetic Testing Is there a link between celiac and other autoimmune diseases? Celiac Disease Research: Associated Diseases and Disorders Is there a list of gluten foods to avoid? Unsafe Gluten-Free Food List (Unsafe Ingredients) Is there a list of gluten free foods? Safe Gluten-Free Food List (Safe Ingredients) Gluten-Free Alcoholic Beverages Distilled Spirits (Grain Alcohols) and Vinegar: Are they Gluten-Free? Where does gluten hide? Additional Things to Beware of to Maintain a 100% Gluten-Free Diet What if my doctor won't listen to me? An Open Letter to Skeptical Health Care Practitioners Gluten-Free recipes: Gluten-Free Recipes
0
RiaG14

How Do I Handle Family Functions That Revolve Around Food?

Rate this topic

Recommended Posts

I have three functions coming up (1. brothers confirmation, 2. cousins first birthday, 3. cousins HS graduation) that I have been invited to and am really looking forward to going to. However, all of them have come with the caveat "wed love to have you but there will not be any gluten free food available". Two of the events are sit down dinners at catering halls, but the people throwing the parties would rather me bring my own food instead of calling the place to make something for me. The other is an outside BBQ. All three events are over 2 hours away (one way) from my home.

Does anyone have any suggestions of what I can bring, and how (with the long car ride) so that I have food to eat and dont feel totally out of place ? Im not a fan of being the center of attention so id rather not have the entire party looking at me wondering why i cant just eat what everyone else is.

How about heating up food? Would you trust a catering hall that you have not interacted with to heat up your food for you?

What have you done in similiar situations in the past? Any help or ideas would be really helpful! Im really starting to stress out about this and would really like to attend the parties, I wish so many celebrations were not centered around food!

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites
Ads by Google:
Ads by Google:


I have a big lunch box I purchased at Wal-Mart (mfg is Ozark). I sling that over my shoulder, like a purse. I use a couple of Coleman frozen fake ice bags to keep things cold. Nobody ever says a word about it, even though it's red. I pack my lunch every day and live in the deep south, work on the road and the bag sits in my hot car for quite a few hours while I'm doing what I do to make a living. I also have a small Coleman thermas for hot foods.

I don't like making a scene about what I eat either, prefer to fit in. For the first two events, I'd probabaly call family or the hall to see what they're serving, and pack a gluten-free equivalent.

I've never tried asking a caterer to warm something in the microwave. I'd want them to use parchment paper on top if they did.

Another option is to call the caterer to see if they really can't do something gluten-free. Many caterers are more understanding out of necessity these days. I'm pretty sure they can handle the salad course for you.

For the barbeque, I love a pork roast or chicken cooked in the crockpot or grilled with Cattleman's sauce (I buy it at Wal-Mart), it's less than $1.58, other posters have liked Sweet Baby Ray's. You can make coleslaw or potato salad and know it's safe. I like that in a lettuce wrap or on it's own. If things are hectic, just pack some chili from Wendy's on the way.

Welcome to the forum, by the way, hope you have fun at the events!

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

My son and I are both gluten free and since my husband comes from a large, Irish family, we usually have several events a month. Since my son is very, very sensitive, he can't eat anything made in a "regular" kitchen, even if they try to do it gluten free. I bought us each the "Zojirushi Classic Bento Vacuum Lunch Jar" (online at Amazon) and it is perfect for bringing our meals wherever we go. Food stays hot for the day . . . I've brought home leftovers that are still warm after 6-8 hours. It is pretty compact, so it is neat and organized when you need to pull it out. It was expensive (for a fancy lunch box) but I figured that this is what we will be doing from now on so it was worth it. They have three sizes (classic, Mr. Bento, and Mrs. Bento) We have the classic and it hold a lot of food. Sometimes I just pack one and it holds enough for both of us.

I always try to make something similar to whatever is being served so we don't stick out too much.

If it is a pot luck type event, I bring our meal and also a side dish and dessert to share. If you bring something to share, make sure people know it needs to be kept separate. I've had several dishes ruined (for us) by someone using a different spoon (from another salad) or someone putting all the brownies on one plate to save room at the table, etc.

At the last wedding we were at, I did go into the kitchen to plate our food - but other places/events, I just whip out the containers and put it on a plate right at the table.

You will get good at it and it ends up being no big deal.

Cara

  • Upvote 1

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

It's also really positive that they have invited you to bring your own food. It's way less tricky than negotiating situations where they say "we've made something gluten free especially for you!" and you're then terrified that it's been contaminated (likely) and have to feel bad about not eating it (either pushing it around your plate in which case they are likely to try making something "gluten free" for you again another time or hurting feelings by saying outright that you appreciate the gesture but you can't eat it. Neither is fun :( )

It does get easier with time. I hope you have a good time at the events!

  • Upvote 1

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

I've been diagnosed celiac (via blood work and endoscopy) for a year now and I still have metaphorical panic attacks when it comes to eating at parties, be it with family or friends. The worst part is when you're around people you've never met and you have to explain why you're not eating x,y,z plus the other half of the alphabet. Not only do I worry about accidentally being glutened, I really worry about cross contamination.

Honestly, the best way I've learned to cope with it is 1. DON'T feel guilty about asking questions, no matter how strangely people look at you and 2. when in doubt, go with the plainest food at the table. A baked potato, beans, meat without gravy, a salad without dressing, I can usually find something I'm sure is safe---or hopefully a few somethings---and then I fill my plate up with that.

It is embarrassing to have to ask for a seperate 'allergy menu' at a restaurant though, and then explain to the server in front of everyone exactly what you can't have, and how the food is prepared. A year into my diagnosis and I really dread going to restaurants. Half the time I tell the waiter what I can't have, and he winces and explains the only thing they're sure is gluten free is the salad.

But what are you going to do, celiacs have to stay healthy, right?

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites
Ads by Google:


I would eat before the event or take a lunch that I could eat in the car and then have a green salad or something at the event (bring my own dressing). I wouldn't want to take food to be heated up and I would try to make things as simple as possible and not make a big deal out of my needs. Adopt a mindset that these events you are going to are just 1 day or so out of your life - not your whole life. Eat before you go, take a snack and eat when you get home if you need to...you'll be fine.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

Why are they telling you not to call? That's ridiculous and rude. Banquet halls and hotel ballrooms where they hold weddings and parties are the best at accommodating gluten free. Those types of events are where I've had the easiest time. They won't mind at all making you something. I even had great luck at a couple of things where it was a buffet. The chef came out and gave me a personal tour of the buffet before we got started so I knew what I could eat.

If they are embarrassed or feel like it will be extra trouble they need to get over it. These people are professionals and they are used to doing this. It will be fine and have ZERO affect on the people having the party.

I'm so upset for you that your family is treating you like this. Are they super uptight or something? I just don't understand why it matters to them if you call and get your own food straightened out. Do they have some weird idea that the banquet hall will be offended? They deal with thousands of people every year. They won't even remember your event.

  • Upvote 1

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites


Ads by Google:


It is embarrassing to have to ask for a seperate 'allergy menu' at a restaurant though, and then explain to the server in front of everyone exactly what you can't have, and how the food is prepared. A year into my diagnosis and I really dread going to restaurants. Half the time I tell the waiter what I can't have, and he winces and explains the only thing they're sure is gluten free is the salad.

But what are you going to do, celiacs have to stay healthy, right?

That's why you always call ahead. Call in between lunch and dinner so the manager isn't busy with customers. Always speak to the manager NOT the waiters or hostess. Tell them you have an allergy because they understand that word. Ask them to help you figure out what you can eat in their restaurant. Ask if they will be working the day you come in and if not who the manager is that day. Get it all ready ahead of time.

Then on the day excuse yourself to go to the bathroom and instead find the manager. Get it squared away out of earshot of your party. Talk to your waiter too when you do that.

I've never had "the conversation" at a table in front of everyone at an event.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

This is a good topic, especially for today! Being Mother's Day, I was invited to my middle daughter's home along with her in-laws. Since I was newly diagnosed, the results for my daughters have not been determined, but there are some possible symptoms yet unexplained for anything else. This was an affair of about 25 people today. My daughter said, Mom, just bring a couple of your gluten free favorites, and we will have fresh veggies and fruits in our menu as well.

I realize this is not always the case, however, when it comes to caterers, many of them do appetizers of fresh foods. That is always a plus. Someone already mentioned eating at home before going....as well...and then yes, just bring something to nibble on.

Have been trying some gluten free recipes posted here, which is so nice. Trying to introduce gluten free prepared products later, so if it isn't fresh, I have been buying the special rice flour, xanthum gum, etc. It is hard after many years of eating gluten, but I like to cook, so am enjoying being a "Gluten free Chef"! (many of my cousins are Celiacs as well, so they have been sharing some recipes too)

Hope you can enjoy these special events in your life. :)

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

Create an account or sign in to comment

You need to be a member in order to leave a comment

Create an account

Sign up for a new account in our community. It's easy!

Register a new account

Sign in

Already have an account? Sign in here.

Sign In Now

0

  • Forum Statistics

    • Total Topics
      108,428
    • Total Posts
      941,222
  • Member Statistics

    • Total Members
      66,357
    • Most Online
      3,093

    Newest Member
    ktdidhurry
    Joined
  • Popular Now

  • Topics

  • Posts

    • Hi Johno,  fellow brit here. Crappy uk medical experience is par for the course unfortunately where this is concerned, so don't expect too much help from that sphere. Although with a positive diagnosis you should be eligible for dietician advice and monitoring of nutrient levels.  First, 4 month in is still early days. If you have cracked the diet and are not suffering cross contamination (v easily done) then you still have at least 2 and maybe 8 months of healing to come. So it's little early yet to be thinking that your celiac isn't responding to he diet.  1. Sleep issues. You don't mention what these are, but yes, celiac is definitely linked to sleep disorders. In fact it's linked with just about everything due to the way it impacts the body. Almost all systems can be affected. You may also find if the sleep issues are neurological in origin that they will be the last to go on the diet. I find neuro symptoms are the first symptom and last to go. Note also that although Gastrointestinal is commonly percieved as the major celiac presenting symptom, this isn't the case. So your not alone in not having major tummy issues.  It's not caused by mentality but it sure as hell affects it.  2. How long have you got? I tested negative so I'm in the ncgs category and some won't even accept that my condition exists. Even understanding of celiac is still developing. Research is ongoing as is levels of incidence. It's up 4 times since the 1950s so something is going on, better testing is perhaps revealing more. you have positive diagnosis, so you have good evidence to keep you strict on the diet. Eat as well as you can. Try to keep gluten free processed foods to  minimum  and eat fresh whole foods where possible. Treat this first 6 months as a one off healing period and help your body as much as possible. Take some good quality supplements, regardless of what the tests are saying. B complex, magnesium and a multivitamin are a good safety net if nothing else.  Read the newbie thread on this site and double check your kitchen etc for possible cross contamination sources. Could be seasoning, shared butter etc. You need to develop a sense of vigilance about this whilst staying on the right side of paranoia! finally, a warm welcome to a good site  
    • This disease is like a chameleon and seems to change symptoms on people and everyone is a bit different, heck some have no symptoms til it almost kills them with secondary issues like cancer, lymphoma, rupturing the intestines etc.
      I did not have ht classic D but constipation, I also had a bunch of other signs that I had grown into and considered normal. My big thing was neurological side of it. I had gluten ataxia where it attacked my brain and nervous system compounded by b vitamin deficiency, I had learned about the magnesium deficiency months earlier and was supplementing for that part of it. Anyway my health was getting bad, tired, random gut pains, brain looping on the same thought over and over driving me mad, bouts of anger and rage. I was running a bucket list before they got it diagnosed.
      Wish it was done earlier my immune system developed other issues like corn allergies, bunch of intolerance then years later learned I had also developed Ulcerative Colitis.

      There are some mental aspects to it, one part is the effects of vitamin deficiency like the b-vitamins, can be very detrimental to you mental health. Various others have cumulative effects or require others nutrients to work right. SO you have to find your balance and supplement til you heal, or sometimes for life. 

      There is also odd fight or flight responses I have noticed from me and others, your body starts to associate gluten and certain foods with discomfort, once off them starting to smell them or thing they might have contaminated your food brings out a panic like fight or flight as you subconsciously attribute that smell, thought, food, etc. with pain and discomfort.

      This disease is really not well understood, contradicitve....hell it is the only disease where you have to poison yourself to the point of causing major damage for them to learn you have it.....like "Here eat this poison so we can see if it makes you sick, but you have to be really sick for us to know it is this poison that makes you sick as it only effects some people"
    • I just quoted a little part but really much of your experiences could be mine. I won't bore you with it all, but chest pains came from 19, herniated disk came at 21, followed by 20 years of sciatic back pain. Depression at or about the same time. Brain fog little later. There was lots more, primarily neurological. Internally I expected to die in my 30s or maybe reach 40.  Nothing shifted any of it until I changed my diet and inadvertently reduced my gluten consumption. I went back on gluten for testing, confident I'd found my cause only to test negative. I did keep a diary however and that helped me and my consultant decide that gluten was off the menu for life.  Couple of things which may be helpful. There is more than one blood test. You may find that one of the others works for you. I never got them all and wonder sometimes if I would have tested positive on another one. You can post your results here if you would like some help in interpreting them. you mentions feeling relief when you ate less gluten. Are you sure you were eating it up to the test? Removing it may have altered the results. Finally, once testing is complete, go properly gluten free even if you tested negative on scope and blood. For some people, they test negative but still react. That could be you and give how closely some of my symptoms match to yours it may be the case. best of luck, you will find this site full of support and useful info. You are not alone in this. matt  
    • Morning guys.  So long story short. Lost 10 kg back late last year. Stress related I believe. ( I Understand this is a big factor with celiacs) Tested. Found anti bodies in my blood. Doctor states potential Celiacs. Have endoscopy. Doctor who takes procedure doubts I have it. Move to London. Move Doctor appointment. Here nothing from Doctors. Fast Forward from December (endoscopy) to July. Ring up doctos asking what my result were as I hadnt heard anything (While eating gluten) Get told "oh, you have celiacs"...........Ridicolous that I wasnt contacted. But anyway thats not the issue.   Fast forward to Now. Gluten Free diet. I have had 1 day I would say in 4 months that I have had super energised, felt great. Sticks in my mind. Had more bloods for all anemia/deficiencies. Everything is fine. Im still exhausted. Every day. My stomach wakes me up 90 percent of the time. I dont have loose stools. Never really have. My mood was severly low. Im really starting to feel like this Celiac is dealt with so primitively.  There is zero sense to any of this. I have tried everything. I watch these shows of people talking like they are dying. Its just painful, everything about it.   1)Wondering if anyone here has had the sleep issues. Im really starting to think this disease is entirely caused by mentality. 2) Thoughts on the contradictive studies/opinions of this disease?    
    • Getting a celiac disease diagnosis is shocking.  Expect to go through all the stages of grief.  Your best defense is to learn how to read labels, avoid cross contamination and consider eating as few processed foods for a few weeks.  It may speed healing (wish someone would have advised me to do so).  You might keep a food journal because celiacs tend to have leaky guts (this is a real thing) causing food intolerances that often resolve with healing.  Lactose intolerance is probably the most common.  You just have to experiment.   The bottom line is that soon you will feel so much better!  Just be patient.  It took a while for you to get sick and it will take time to recover.  😄 If you need to vent, ask a product question, or whatever, we are here to help!  
  • Upcoming Events