• Content count

  • Joined

  • Last visited

Community Reputation

0 Neutral

About Xgth

  • Rank
    New Community Member

Recent Profile Visitors

227 profile views
  1. Thanks for your input, everyone! I will get tested soon enough for this condition, and I will definitely update you all when the results finally come in.
  2. Greetings, everyone! My name is David. I have dealt with high-functioning autism since I was a little kid. I had a healthy childhood, and then, in the summer of 2012, back when I was fifteen and a half years old, I began experiencing a weird combination of semi-mania, occasional and inexplicable brain fog, and an overall state of high energy and very strong self-confidence. However, a few months later, in September and early October of 2012, I rather abruptly stopped feeling so great, and the brain fog hit me even worse, Anhedonia and a pervasive sense of depersonalization also began. During this short span, I began to fear that my Asperger's (which I still highly valued at the time) was somehow fading away and that I would turn into a neurotypical. But mysteriously enough, after three weeks of being in this lull, I quickly returned to a state of inner peace, good well-being, relatively high energy, and renewed ambition. Moving ahead to the spring of 2013, I made new friendships and was again in a state of near-euphoria, strength, and persistent joy. And then, in the early summer of 2013, the fatigue began, and the elation faded away. Initially, this fatigue was physical in nature and limited to a mild loss of endurance while going out on jogs, but eventually, by February of 2014, I was also beginning to experience mental fatigue, occasional-yet-intense depression, and a stubborn and new OCD-like anxiety about losing my own thoughts and emotions of value. As the months went by, my performance in both academics and track and field began to decline, subtly but surely. and the depression worsened. Thinking at the time that my dopamine system was underactive, I began taking the NDRI, Wellbutrin, in 2014's summer, and ultimately, my anxieties, fatigue, and depression only worsened. In the fall of 2014, I ended the Wellbutrin treatment and began taking Risperidone, which, thankfully, did quickly relieve my OCD-like anxiety and eventually my depressed mood as well. For the most part, I consistently have been on antipsychotics since then, which have kept me calm, polite, and sleeping well at night. Nevertheless, by now, I am now twenty years old, and I now take Abilify everyday. I continue to deal with treatment-resistant anhedonia, which seems to grow a bit each day and effects me at all points in the day and night. Even my dreams seem to be devoid of much happiness (although, luckily for me, I at least rarely have nightmares). Also, for whatever little emotions I still have, I am detached from them to the point that it almost seems as if someone else inside my head is experiencing the pleasure or pain, not "me." And, finally, the chronic fatigue also continues to get a bit worse every week, more or less. I have not dealt with any gastrointestinal issues that I am aware of, and to be fair, I also have NOT had to experience any headaches or pains from anywhere on my body, so I am not overly-convinced that I actually have gluten intolerance of any kind. HOWEVER, we have definitely ruled out Neuro-Lyme, chronic fatigue syndrome, or any real neurodegenerative disease. I will again say and add that SSRI's, SNRI's, and pro-dopamine medications either failed to help me or even made things worse. I consider myself to have some peculiar form of depression, but, as I have mentioned before, it doesn't really manifest like standard (or atypical, for the matter) depression, because low mood and anxiety were never the initial or primary symptoms to begin with. The emotional detachment, in my opinion, probably goes beyond a simple case of depression, because there are no negative emotions in my mind anymore that would be a likely cause of it. Even for depression, my anhedonia seems extremely stubborn and severe, almost as if a neurological hiccup of some kind if occurring in my frontal lobes. Traditionally speaking, I have always been a lover and heavy consumer of bread and carbs. In your opinion, could my depression-like disorder, in fact, be a rare and extremely insidious manifestation of Celiac Disease, or at the very least, bad gluten intolerance? OR, on the other hand, am I just suffering from unusually pervasive depression? I plan on getting tested within a few months, but I am very curious as to what you all have to say about my own experience in the meanwhile. Any thoughts, comments, or insights would be greatly appreciated. Thank you.