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LoveBeingATwin

7 Months Pregnant! :)

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Well it has been a long time since I have posted so I will give you a little update. I am seven months pregnant and doing very well. We are so excited!! The pregnancy has gone very well and I am feeling very good. My Celiac has been under controll for a while now. I am finally realising what my body likes and dislikes...and this was prior to baby. I have not had the big D in almost six months. It has been really nice and I love feeling like my self again.

Ok..so here is why I am posting. I need advise on how to handle in laws. My in laws have been great since I have meet my husband, over ten years ago. They are always helpful, polite, they stay out of our business but this is where I am having problems now. Since they have fund out I am having a baby they are constantly asking questions and wanting to be invovled in EVERYTHING. What do I do? I come from a small family and my twin and I had only each other and my family is NOT overbarring with anything. I am getting really stressed because it's like I can't make anyone happy.

I changed the location of my shower to accomidate a half sister and now the mother in law wants to know why? Then my sister is throwing my shower (never get between twins.....) like everyone new she would and I told my sister in law she could help my sister so they have both scheduled a time to go get the stuff. Here is my problem...my sister in law called and want's to know if she even has to pay for stuff since her name isn't on the invitation as the one hosting the shower. My sister expects no money from anyone, butmy sister in law was like do I even need to give her money since my name is not on the invitaion? I was like she doen't expect money, my sister just thought would be nice to have her included in deocorating etc. What do I do? How do I make everyone happy. Why do people get so caddy about little things?I know I can't but I just am so tired of feeling overwhelmed. and of course it's not god for the baby!! Any advise would be great.

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Ah, family stuff. Babies and weddings always seem to be sources of conflict.

It seems to me that none of these issues are really your problem. Why doesn't your SIL talk to your sister about the money since they're the co-hosts? It doesn't make any sense to get you involved as the middle man. And about the change in location - it's just not that important. I don't see why your MIL needs a reason for the change (unless it's somehow going to really inconvenience her).

If I were you, I'd be very specific about what they can and cannot be involved in and get your husband to back you up on enforcing this. It's your baby, you may not do things the way the rest of the family would, but what every you do is going to be fine. Baby decisions should be between you and your husband, not open for the whole family to discuss and vote on.

Not terribly helpful, sorry. Good luck.

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Congrats Kimberly!

I'm 30 weeks and know where you are coming from. My sister is planning my shower and I dread answering the phone some days!!! As for your SIL asking the money questions the best response I think you could give is "I don't think she was expecting you to chip in so I will leave the decision up to you and her" and hopefully she won't keep bringing it up but put the responsibility in her lap, not on yours! And if she doesn't let it go, tell her you can't talk to her about the money issue any more and you would appreciate it if she would talk to your sister about it. I'm learning the best way to get any issues off the table right now is to be direct. And the good thing is you can blame the hormones.

As for meddling in-laws, yikes! Is your DH good a getting them to back off? Maybe if he just mentioned to his mom that you are super stressed with everything and the doc. told you to try and take it easy then she would back off? Also, there is a reason there is caller ID. If you know it's some one calling who will stress you out, let it go to voicemail and pick one day a week where you call every one back. I've had to cut down on phone time with my own mom because she was becoming too overbearing. Unless something is an emergency, they can wait!

Amy

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