Jump to content
  • Sign Up
0
Elliebelle

Unsupportive Family?

Rate this topic

Recommended Posts

I'm a teen, started a gluten free diet one month ago. Instead of feeling SOOO much better like everyone insisted would, I've progressivley gotten worse not to mention I've gained weight. To be completely honest, that's only a fraction of whats bothering me. My mother says I need to eat better (fruits, salad, ect.) and I agree with her. Problem is, how in the world do you eat healthy when no one else in your house does? How can you make yourself a healthy meal when everyone else eats their junk? She constantly claims that she's made healthy meals, but her idea of a healthy meal is steak, potatoes, and a salad. Another thing, I don't eat meat, and won't eat something thats had it's life ripped away from it for my satisfaction, and no matter how many times I tell her that she just says " that's fine, but *insert ridiculous argument where she throws the fact that I don't eat meat in my face."

She "tried" (sorry attempt, if you ask me. You don't use the same toaster as everyone else to toast gluten free bread, and that's just the tip of it all) going gluten free. 2 weeks later.... FAIL. She claims that she wants a positive result. Yeah, sure. The whole reason ( I think) that she wanted to do this in the first place is because she thought she would lose weight, which she did. 6 pounds in 2 weeks? Can't that be me?! Yet she quit.

She just finished yelling at me because "I don't help her ever, and I don't tell her what I want when we shop" but she just won't listen! Why oh why would I be all aboard the health train when everything around me is processed, cheese powdered junk? She refuses to relize that someone can't stick to something when their surroundings are screaming at them to go back!

Gahhhh! I honestly can't wait to move a thousand miles away from this selfish, ignorant thing that calls herself a mother!

/ rant.

Anyone else had this problem? And sorry for the looonnnggg rant :(

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

Sorry to hear things aren't going well. Do you have anyone else in the family that you can turn to or may be able to help in any way? I have the same problem but I am the mom with celiac and have one child out of 4 that has it as well. He is 23 and doesnt follow the diet and now is very sick. He lives on his own and eats whatever he feels and I am trying to get him better and eating better. This can be very harmful if the gluten fre diet is not followed. If you ever want to talk most everyone on here will listen. So do your best to try and follow the diet and eat fruits and veggies, hopefully in time you will start feeling better. ;)

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

My idea of a healthy meal is a steak, potato, and a salad, but that is because my body does not process grain carbohydrates like the majority of people do.

I am a lapsed vegetarian who is much healthier as an omnivore.

To do this diet as vegetarian, in a healthy manner, takes a lot of planning. One would have to eat a lot of legumes, beans, nuts for protein and seriously consider adding eggs and yogurt/cheese, if possible. There is a lot of pressure in our society right now to be/go vegetarian, which is not always possible. The only time I get annoyed is when other people INSIST I would be healthier, they have not experienced my reactions to it. I can't do much soy at all because of my thyroid, a common side effect of being gluten intolerant, so that takes soy products like tofu and soymilk out, which further contributes to its difficulty.

I don't have any problems sticking to what I need to, and gluten foods don't really appeal to me, but I am very motivated to feel better because I have felt worse. I also am pretty careful to eat what I need and take vitamin and mineral supplements so I don't get cravings too bad. This means fruit, vegetables, fats, and proteins, not a lot of bread and cereal junk. I do eat some gluten-free bread, but it is a multi grain hi protein nut and seed meal version I make myself, not that rice styrofoam junk.

We have enough alternative foods in the house that my spouse eats gluten free when eating at home, which he volunteered to do, to my ongoing amazement. I did not ask him for this, it's just how it worked out as it's easier for both of us to make gluten free meals to share.

It is not hard to do breakfasts and lunches as vegetarian gluten free. A piece of fruit, a handfull of nuts, some cheese or yogurt, some cereal if you can process carbohydrates. Lunch can be gluten-free peanut butter and jelly or beans on a corn tortilla or rice cake, and a vegetable and fruit. NONE of that requires cooking. It is only dinner that seems to be a problem, a salad or cooked green vegetable steamed in the microwave is part of that, and the best thing to do would be to learn how to cook and stay out of other people's way in the kitchen....

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

elliebelle-oh you poor thing, can you come to live at my house??? how hard it must be when all your old foods are staring you in the face....

maybe you can go do your own shopping/or even shop for foods online? do you have a job or even your own money to buy gluten-free foods? maybe you can ask your doctor or dietician to help educate your parents on the importance of your diet? if your mom makes the steak/potato/salad meal you could just eat the potato and salad, at least it's better than nothing. don't kill me for suggesting this but have you ever tried to cook yourself or offer to help your mom prepare food for the family? i'm sure she would love the help. there is a great cookbook by danna korn (sp?) with many easy teen-friendly recipes for you.

my heart goes out to you-please keep posting, we can all give you much needed support. please stick with it even though you don't feel better yet, it may take months but it will happen! you have to develop very strong will power to ignore what your eyes see that your stomach cannot have, it will get easier and easier with time and the more you feel better.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

hi there,

I'm a mom in a household of "mixed nutritional needs"

you said your moms typical meal was steak, potatoes and salad.

Well, you could profit from a small portion of steak. My daughter prefers a vegetarian style herself, but, as a teen, its really difficult to get all the essential amino acids you need from plant sources alone. Tyrosine and Tryphtophan are very important, and while there are some non-animal sources of these, lean meats like chcken would be very beneficial in that regard.

A bit of steak would help you iron levels too.

I would suggest the tact of minimizing but not entirely eliminating meat consumtion. A 3 to 6 oz serving daily - imagine a portion that would fit in your palm.

Capitalize on that salad. Greens are great. Add to the salad things like slivered almonds, and raisons... yum.

potatoes are ok, you need starch in some form, but could I suggest brown rice. You could cook this ahead, store in the frig, and nuke in the microwave when it comes time for dinner. Brown rice has become my staple carb. I love its flavor and the extra fiber it has provides multiple benefits.

What I do around here. My husband is the chief cook and he has no particular nutritional needs other than to lose a few pounds (ha ha.) So, I make it a point of having on hand, pre cooked, available for microwaving, brown rice, butternut squash, carrots (raw and or cooked), salad material and fixin's, as well as fresh fruit. He cooks the main dish, I supplement sides, and we eat more or less smorgasboard style. We can all eat according to our own needs - or - desires in this way.

Maybe you could help with the "sides" so you have plenty of options at mealtime.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

Sorry to hear you're unhappy but the only way to change that is to change how you handle your own food. Don't expect the people around you to change because you will probably be disapointed.

The problem with eating no meat is that those with celiac disease seem to need especially high amounts of protein. You are going to have to research and do some meal planning to get enough of it. I would guess that that is a big part of why your mom lost weight and you gained; she was eating high protein and I am guessing your levels are too low.

The other part of weight gain is often if you are eating a lot of processed, high carb foods. The alternate grains used in these foods are often high on the glycemic index and can really pile on the weight. Quinoa is high in protein and a good choice.

Do your homework and get some balanced meals planned for yourself. Then you can give your mom the help she needs by providing her with a shopping list for your food. If you balance your protein level and eat less of those carbs, I think you'll see your weight shift down too.

It's time to take responsibility for your diet and disease. It's good practise for when you are out on your own.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites
elliebelle-oh you poor thing, can you come to live at my house??? how hard it must be when all your old foods are staring you in the face....

maybe you can go do your own shopping/or even shop for foods online? do you have a job or even your own money to buy gluten-free foods? maybe you can ask your doctor or dietician to help educate your parents on the importance of your diet? if your mom makes the steak/potato/salad meal you could just eat the potato and salad, at least it's better than nothing. don't kill me for suggesting this but have you ever tried to cook yourself or offer to help your mom prepare food for the family? i'm sure she would love the help. there is a great cookbook by danna korn (sp?) with many easy teen-friendly recipes for you.

my heart goes out to you-please keep posting, we can all give you much needed support. please stick with it even though you don't feel better yet, it may take months but it will happen! you have to develop very strong will power to ignore what your eyes see that your stomach cannot have, it will get easier and easier with time and the more you feel better.

Could I?! Haha, living with someone who actually gave it some thought would be GREAT.

I've made dinner for the family in the past, but I don't now. Her work schedule isn't the easiest to follow along with, so having a planned out family meal (before 9:00) is pretty much impossible. Besides that, no one ever has anything good to say anyways.

And I did suggest buying my own food last night, but that's just not happening for her. I don't think it would help much anyways, seeing as all my food gets eaten by the resident slime ball (step dad.)

I will stick with it though, becuase I know who important it is that I avoid gluten. The way the test results and biopsy results came back, it sounds to me like I was a few only years away from having some very serious problems....

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

Hi Elliebellie, You have a hard situation with the family. I second a visit to a nutritionist that specializes in celiac with your mother. You really need some help and support about food in your house. Gluten free substitute foods made from starches have about 3 times the carbohydrates of their wheat counterparts...in other words, gluten-free bread,pizzas, pastas, made from tapioca flour, brown rice flour, and other starches are very carb dense. This means (as my doctor put it) one gluten-free cookie equals 3 wheat one. I, too, initially gained weight on the gluten-free diet. My spouse, who does not have celiac, has lost weight just because some of his wheat foods are not as available. Very annoying.

When I was a teen, a long time ago, I was a vegetarian in a family of meat eaters. My mother was very angry and unsympathetic to this, and on several occasions forced me to eat meat. So I really sympathize with this aspect of your life. Maybe coming up with protein sources that you like to eat will bring your mother around. Beans, chickpeas, tofu, nuts, seeds, eggs, are all sources of protein. Good luck, and remember, there are lots of us out here eating gluten-free, with all of its trials.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

elliebelle-i meant to write this in my first post to you, but forgot; but it goes along with what everyone else is saying about needing the protein-my favorite is a big mixed green salad (you can by it by the bad alread pre-cleaned and mixed in the produce section at walmart) with hard-boiled eggs, nuts (any type, i like pecans), & raisins; you can also add cheese if you can tolerate dairy. it tastes really good with a little bit of gluten free dressing-i use neuman's own honey mustard. the more you try the more you'll find you actually like; i'm still learning too.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

A little update here. My aunt is moving out of our basement sometime before the end of september, which means I get to move down there. It's got a kitchen type setup too, so I told the mother that I want some sort of mini fridge, even if I have to buy it myself. Until then, I told her that I wanted my own drawer in the "family" fridge so everyone else would keep their paws off my food. Hopefully she at least listen to that.

Good news for me though, her friend from work, who is more my friend than hers is coming up soon, and is stopping at her local farmer's market to pick m up organic fruits and veggies (last week we had an exstensive conversation on what happens to fruit you buy from the regular grocery stores, scary stuff right there.) Does this sound like a step in the right direction? Also, does anyone have any meal type plans for me? I'm not making anything for the rest of them, seeing as they're uninterested in any kind of change anyways, so just me. I do eat alot of peanut butter and cheese ( I can handle dairy, yay me!) so I get some potien there, but does anyone have suggestions besides meat?

Thanks for all your kind words and help! It means a lot, especially right now! :)

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

Try googling Happy Cow Vegetarian Protein and Guide to get a list of non-meat protein.

While you are traveling down the road to better health, remember that it isn't an all or nothing, immediate fix. Make changes one by one. It is ideal to have organic produce, but it isn't always practical when it comes to the budget or your geographic location. Do the best you can, it's better to eat a non-organic apple than no apple at all... Every tiny change you make blesses your body, but you might not be able to make them all at once. That doesn't mean you aren't benefiting from the changes you can make. The media gives us this false pressure of needing to have the perfect organic vegetarian diet immediately, right now, this instant... but reality is it takes time to build a healthy lifestyle, you can't just go buy a kit and overnight have perfect health.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites
A little update here. My aunt is moving out of our basement sometime before the end of september, which means I get to move down there. It's got a kitchen type setup too, so I told the mother that I want some sort of mini fridge, even if I have to buy it myself. Until then, I told her that I wanted my own drawer in the "family" fridge so everyone else would keep their paws off my food. Hopefully she at least listen to that.

Good news for me though, her friend from work, who is more my friend than hers is coming up soon, and is stopping at her local farmer's market to pick m up organic fruits and veggies (last week we had an exstensive conversation on what happens to fruit you buy from the regular grocery stores, scary stuff right there.) Does this sound like a step in the right direction? Also, does anyone have any meal type plans for me? I'm not making anything for the rest of them, seeing as they're uninterested in any kind of change anyways, so just me. I do eat alot of peanut butter and cheese ( I can handle dairy, yay me!) so I get some potien there, but does anyone have suggestions besides meat?

Thanks for all your kind words and help! It means a lot, especially right now! :)

I am glad things look like they will be getting better. You have gotten some good ideas as far as protein goes but one that wasn't mentioned yet is hemp milk or hemp protein powder. Buckwheat is also a good source of protein. When going the beans route you should eat them with rice. The two combined will create a complete protein. A rice cooker can be quite helpful. Just throw the rice in the bottom and the liquid and then put your beans and veggies in the top. Quick to prepare, only one pan to clean and anything left over can be stir fryed the next day.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

I've always been a fan of fresh produce, and farmer's markets and farm stands are a lot of fun, and a good habit to form. On past vacations, we've gotten off the interstate, to drive the state roads, just so we can stop at these great places!

Another poster indicated how "nutrient dense" gluten free products are. Meaning they have more calories than similar products prepared from wheat. I found this out recently on my first foray into a local health food store. I was looking for some gluten free snacks and cereal for my daughter. But because if they're around I'll eat it - and I don't have her metabolism - I studied the nutrition labels before I purchased.

What I found is that almost all the prepared cereals that were more or less analagous to the things she's used to eatig for breakfast had about double the calories for the same serving size. I finally found one puffed rice cereal that was more similar in calorie and fat content. We like it.

I focus in on the fat grams because I have a hereditary tendency for high cholesterol and a few years back my doctor threatened me with cholesterol meds. He gave me six months to get my cholesterol from over 250 to under 200. I was successful, because I watched out for the ole fat grams. I lost a few pounds in the process as a side effect.

you don't need to be - or want to be - fat gram paranoid because your body does need some fats. I've been reading lately about the misnomers associated with animal fats and I have actually started using butter (for baking) again and eating more red meat.

On the other hand its probably not a good idea to eat processed or prepared stuff that's loaded with fat. And I was really surprised at the high (or what I consider to be high) amount of fat grams on the labels. The cereal I picked was more moderate in this regard.

The gluten free crackers and snacks (other than puffed rice cakes) - same story. Big calories, high fat grams. So I am sticking to my homemade brown rice crackers. They are wicked easy to make if you want the recipe.

For those of you who do your own baking - here is a useful website.

http://recipes.sparkpeople.com/recipe-calculator.asp

this allows you to plug in the ingredients of a recipe and get a complete nutritional analysis. you are asked for the number of servings and you get the values per serving.

I did this with my cracker recipe, to consider whether to use butter or olive oil. guess what butter was better.

Also I found that one of my crackers is the equivalent of 3 or 4 saltines! However we find that they are more satisfying and filling so we are content with fewer>

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites
I've always been a fan of fresh produce, and farmer's markets and farm stands are a lot of fun, and a good habit to form. On past vacations, we've gotten off the interstate, to drive the state roads, just so we can stop at these great places!

Another poster indicated how "nutrient dense" gluten free products are. Meaning they have more calories than similar products prepared from wheat. I found this out recently on my first foray into a local health food store. I was looking for some gluten free snacks and cereal for my daughter. But because if they're around I'll eat it - and I don't have her metabolism - I studied the nutrition labels before I purchased.

What I found is that almost all the prepared cereals that were more or less analagous to the things she's used to eatig for breakfast had about double the calories for the same serving size. I finally found one puffed rice cereal that was more similar in calorie and fat content. We like it.

I focus in on the fat grams because I have a hereditary tendency for high cholesterol and a few years back my doctor threatened me with cholesterol meds. He gave me six months to get my cholesterol from over 250 to under 200. I was successful, because I watched out for the ole fat grams. I lost a few pounds in the process as a side effect.

you don't need to be - or want to be - fat gram paranoid because your body does need some fats. I've been reading lately about the misnomers associated with animal fats and I have actually started using butter (for baking) again and eating more red meat.

On the other hand its probably not a good idea to eat processed or prepared stuff that's loaded with fat. And I was really surprised at the high (or what I consider to be high) amount of fat grams on the labels. The cereal I picked was more moderate in this regard.

The gluten free crackers and snacks (other than puffed rice cakes) - same story. Big calories, high fat grams. So I am sticking to my homemade brown rice crackers. They are wicked easy to make if you want the recipe.

For those of you who do your own baking - here is a useful website.

http://recipes.sparkpeople.com/recipe-calculator.asp

this allows you to plug in the ingredients of a recipe and get a complete nutritional analysis. you are asked for the number of servings and you get the values per serving.

I did this with my cracker recipe, to consider whether to use butter or olive oil. guess what butter was better.

Also I found that one of my crackers is the equivalent of 3 or 4 saltines! However we find that they are more satisfying and filling so we are content with fewer>

I would love the cracker recipe. i have tried making crackers one time and they turned out quite badly, really salty and more like a waxy flat bread... either way i'd like to go a different way and try something different

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites
I would love the cracker recipe. i have tried making crackers one time and they turned out quite badly, really salty and more like a waxy flat bread... either way i'd like to go a different way and try something different

Can I have your cracker recipe too? I've been eating a lot of the gluten free crackers latley, and I mean A LOT.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

Gladly!

hannahp57, these do sort of turn out like a cross between a traditional crispy cracker and a flat bread, in that they are a little chewy. But I think that is what makes them so satisfying to eat. My daughter told me "hands off" the remaining supply till I make more...

Ellie, I would suggest a serving size of 3 or 4 crackers along with some fruit for a snack. The crackers and fruit, along with some yogurt, makes a quick and easy breakfast, especially if you're not a morning person. (I am definitely not!)

Any hoo:

Brown Rice Crakcers.

2 cups brown rice flour

1/2 teaspoon salt

1/2 to 1 Tablespoon brown sugar

1/2 stick unsalted butter

3/4 to 1 cup water

2 teaspoons dried basil

1 teaspoon dried marjoram.

Mix your dry ingredients all together. Melt the butter and add to dry ingredients; mix together with a fork til crumbly and evenly mixed. Add the water and mix thoroughly til evenly combined. Butter a cookies sheet or shallow pan. Put the ball of dough on the center of the pan and press with your hands into a rectangular shape. I aim for a rectangle that is roughly 7 1/2 inches by 12 inches; this will translate into crackers that are roughly 1 1/2 inches by 2 inches- 30 pieces.

Once the rectangle is evenly spread out it goes into a preheated oven at 350 degrees. After 10 minutes, pull the cookie sheet out, and with a pizza wheel, cut the dough into desired pieces. You do not have to separate the pieces, just make the cut with the wheel. Return to oven for 35 to 40 minutes. (check for browness)

My friend who gave me this recipe makes this in double the amounts for her family. she said that if you add more water you can make a thinner crisppier cracker. I add exactly between 3/4 and 1 cup water, we are happy with this consisitency.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

Create an account or sign in to comment

You need to be a member in order to leave a comment

Create an account

Sign up for a new account in our community. It's easy!

Register a new account

Sign in

Already have an account? Sign in here.

Sign In Now
0

×