Traveling For The Holidays :(

[emcmaster]

I'm apologizing in advance for the lengthy post.

It's very hard for me to travel because of my food problems. I can't eat out anywhere and there are very few packaged products that I can safely consume, so I cook everything I eat (or eat it in its natural state, like apples).

My husband wants to go to stay at his "adoptive" parents' (his best friend's family, who he has spent holidays with for the last 12 years) house in Pensacola for Christmas. I'm all for that, except it will mean I have to cook and freeze 5 days worth of food and find a way to take it. That's not the problem. The problem is I'm very uncomfortable with literally taking over someone's freezer, refrigerator and, esentially, kitchen, for almost a week. The AMOUNT of food I have to bring with me is ridiculous (unsurprisingly, it takes a huge quantity of low-fat vegetable-based food to meet daily calorie requirements) so they will have to clean out their fridge and freezer ahead of time. And even though I can prepare the food before we leave and freeze it, it still means I will be in and out of their kitchen every hour or two, interrupting anything they're doing in there.

I really like these people and I would love to spend some time with them, but I'm incredibly uncomfortable taking over their kitchen for almost a week. And we can't really afford to rent a hotel room with a kitchenette for 5 days.

My husband thinks it's ridiculous that I am uncomfortable taking over someone else's kitchen. To be fair, I understand where he's coming from - he does things I think are irrational, too, and he's normally very supportive and incredibly careful about keeping me gluten-free. But I can't help having a disease that makes eating difficult and then feeling self-conscious about inconveniencing other people.

Is there another option that we're not seeing? I feel like this is a lost cause.

[happygirl]

These are the things that we never thought we would have to think about when we were diagnosed with Celiac! What a strange world we live in.

Couple thoughts run through my mind, although I'm sure you've already thought of them.

Can you call the family and discuss your concerns? Talk openly with them, explain the situation, see the response. They might (and probably will be) extremely gracious---they just want you, and don't care what food you come with. (that is the case with my family and my husband's family, luckily). They'll probably feel bad that you are even worrying. (although we understand)

Do you have to prepare everything before hand? What about shopping down there and picking some stuff up? Making your meals each day (or at least some)? When I go places, I bring a lot, but I also pick stuff up at the store. (I have multiple intolerances and do not eat ANY processed foods at all. None. Not fully sure what you have-but sounds similar in terms of lack of processed foods)

And I know it sucks-what I (and you!) would give to be 'normal.' But, thats not the case for us! We are special . So, in order to live a normal life, we must do what we must. This is what you HAVE to do-its not a choice! So, don't apologize for being you. They really just want to see you and spend time with you. I had a hard time with this, as well. Then it becomes a new version of normal. My biggest thing that keeps me going---I tell myself that I will do everything and anything to not miss out on life because of my eating issues. In five years, what will you remember? Do you want to remember not spending a wonderful holiday together, but that you stayed home (I know that prob won't happen!) because you were too worried? Or do you want to remember a wonderful family holiday and that you were so lucky to have a safe food environment?!

Hope this helps, a bit. Let us know. xo

[tarnalberry]

Well, why doesn't someone call them and ask if it's a problem? If they are his 'adoptive parents' and you are his wife, they might be hurt if you *don't* come use their kitchen for five days! Talk to them. You've got three months to work on this one. Use that time. And look into some foods that don't need to be cooked - bean salads, cold soups, etc.

[Jestgar]

My guess is they'd be thrilled that you trust them enough to ask this of them. You are making your visit easier for them because they don't have to worry about poisoning you. And if anyone in the house enjoys cooking they might have fun learning some of your recipes.

Do ask them about it. Maybe plan some stuff to bring and some stuff to make there. Aim for food you can cook in foil or on/in parchment.

Bring a selection of gluten-free "treats" and have a tasting party.

It's a holiday! Have fun with your food and your situation.

[jerseyangel]

Hi Elizabeth,

I had a similar situation last summer. I obsessed and worried about it for weeks before! Everything turned out fine--I shouldn't have worried--and you shouldn't either

What I did was cook more than I really needed for meals some nights for the couple of weeks before. I'd make myself up a serving and freeze it immediately. I also brought other foods that I'd need with me. Another option would have been to go to the grocery store up there, but I didn't want to take the time to do that. (Little time--lots of people to visit!)

As for worrying about taking over the kitchen--all I really needed to do once there was use the microwave, and throw together salads. I never cook breakfast for myself anyway, and I baked what I needed and brought those things.

I found that my family and my husband's, too, were just glad to see us. What I thought was going to be a big problem , no one even blinked an eye at!

To put your mind at ease, do call and be open and ask--I'm sure that they will be happy to share a bit of their kitchen with you!

[emcmaster]

Thank you all so much for your kind responses. I feel much better about the situation now. I'm going to call and talk to them about it.

[Lollie]

Glad to hear you are going to call! And that you feel better! I had a similar experience just this past August. We live in TX and had to travel to OH to visit my husbands family and gradma's. I took alot of things that I thought I wouldn't be able to find, and then shopped for fresh veggies and fruit when I got there. No body cared! I took over about three different kitchens while I was there. Because we switched houses continously! Everybody was just interested to know about celiac. And I think they liked not having to cook dinner for all of us. I did all the cooking. And that made me happy because I didn't have to worry about being sick! It was a win win situation!

Good Luck!

Lollie