The Funny Pages - Tickle Me Elbow - The Original

[johnsmom]

my mom

[elye]

Good Morning, Sillies.....!

I will be up in 24 hours with millions of others riveted to the TV, watching the opening ceremonies. Dunno how early I'll have to be up to watch it live, but we're talking the polar opposite side of the earth, so it may be something heinous like 3 am er sumfin'.....I am a big phan, but come on.......

Just lauffin' to meself, the word PIZZLE, I think, is highly underused.....I think it should be our goal to work it into as many threads conversations as possible.

Susie, this is a fine idea. I have been wanderlusting amongst other threads of late, so I will get on this. I recall first seeing the word in a third year Renaissance Lit class.....it was in a play....Ben Johnson, I believe. These plebian slaves were mixing some gruel up for their master, or concocting something in a pot, and were using a pizzle to stir it. It was defined as a bull's penis.

PeOter, are they still bulls' penises? (Excuse me, penii?) Do we even know?

Susie, you sound great. So happy to hear YOU sounding happy.

This is a fascinating idea, carrying Annie's clone yourself. Talk about creating a real bond between dog and owner.........

But what if things went awry and you had a litter? Mygawd, the size of you, the nursing afterward....... . .. .

good one ! and lets all post the ultrasound shot of owr kids ,... and hy the mamogram ones... NOT !

OMG......... . . .. yes, mammogram shots!

Have to make sure I post my best side........... . . ..

[blueeyedmanda]

Morning Everyone!

The housing search is continuing today at work in my phew spare moments. Sometimes the info on those forms is n ot correct so even though the house is old it is not that old. Thankfully, John's father is a contractor/home builder so we rely on him for a lot of info

Susie-glad to hear you are pheeling more phunny!

My my---its 8:07 and no one has tickled my fancy here at work yet....are we gearing up for a quiet day with no PoopeyGaDooppey Heads???? We'll see!

[johnsmom]

Uncle ray is in da house:

A very shy guy goes into a bar and sees a

beautiful woman sitting at the bar. After an

hour of gathering up his courage, he finally

goes over to her and asks, tentatively, 'Um,

would you mind if I chatted with you for a while?'

She responds by yelling, at the top of her

lungs, 'NO! I won't sleep with you tonight!'

good one ! I LIKED IT ...

Everyone in the bar is now staring at them.

Naturally, the guy is hopelessly and completely

embarrassed and he slinks back to his table.

After a few minutes, the woman walks over to

him and apologizes. She smiles at him and says,

'I'm sorry if I embarrassed you. You see, I'm

a graduate student in psychology, and I'm studying

how people respond to embarrassing situations.'

To which he responds, at the top of his lungs,

'What do you mean $200?'

[Lisa]

Morning everyone! Here is a funny I thought I would pass on.... Have a great day!

Sometimes, when I look at my children, I say to myself ~~'Lillian, you

should have remained a virgin.'-- Lillian Carter (mother of Jimmy Carter)

I had a rose named after me and I was very flattered. But I was not pleased

to read the description in the catalog: 'No good in a bed, but fine against

a wall.'-- Eleanor Roosevelt

Last week, I stated this woman was the ugliest woman I had ever seen. I have

since been visited by her sister, and now wish to withdraw that statement.--

Mark Twain

The secret of a good sermon is to have a good beginning and a good ending;

and to have the two as close together as possible.-- George Burns

Santa Claus has the right idea. Visit people only once a year. - - Victor

Borge

Be careful about r eading health books. You may die of a misprint.-- Mark

Twain

By all means, marry. If you get a good wife, you'll become happy; if you

get a bad one, you'll become a philosopher. -- Socrates

I was married by a judge. I should have asked for a jury. -- Groucho Marx

Only Irish coffee provides in a single glass all four essential food groups:

alcohol, caffeine, sugar and fat. Alex Levine

I don't feel old. I don't feel anything until noon. Then it's time

for my nap.-- Bob Hope

I never drink water because of the disgusting things that fish do in it.--

W.C. Fields

We could certainly slow the aging process down if it had to work its way

through Congress.-- Will Rogers

Don't worry a bout avoiding temptation as you grow older, it will avoid

you-- Winston Churchill

Maybe it's true that life begins at fifty, but everything else starts to

wear out, fall out, or spread out.-- Phyllis Diller

By the time a man is wise enough to watch his step, he's too old to go

anywhere.-- Billy Crystal

The cardiologist's diet: If it tastes good, spit it out

Give me a sense of humor, Lord; Give me the grace to see a joke, To get some

humor out of life, And pass it on to other folk. Amen.

___________________________

[Jestgar]

and, in other news, I have decided to make a clone of Annie. Going to speak to my mom about this tomorrow, it's only about.........50 thousand dollars, I think, I"ll have her sell the house in Monterey to do this. Gail has also suggested that I might actually like to carry and birth Annie myself... ...this could cost a lot more. If any of you would like to chip in, well, she really is the world's most wonderful dog, and whoever puts in 10K or more can have one of her puppies.

Not a problem Sooze. I'll do the cloning for free, you'll just need to buy the reagents.

[blueeyedmanda]

Not a problem Sooze. I'll do the cloning for free, you'll just need to buy the reagents.

Susie Dear....I may be able to hook you up with some reagents.....my ID badge can access many a lab store rooms here in our Phacility.....it will be like an illegal "trade"

Guys while I was typing Phacility I was laughing because sadly the word flacid came to my mind.....Talk about being in the gutter!

[Jestgar]

Amanda's promoting flaccidity? How does the new hubby feel about that?

[elye]

Guys while I was typing Phacility I was laughing because sadly the word flacid came to my mind.....Talk about being in the gutter!

Okay, Lisa! There's our word for the day.....FLACID. I think I can make a pretty good guess at how one forms this word......

[Green12]

Guys while I was typing Phacility I was laughing because sadly the word flacid came to my mind.....Talk about being in the gutter!

Amanda is getting phunnier and phunier

I love the house! It looks like it's got lots of charm, and a great porch too. They don't make them like they used to that's for sure.

Okay, Lisa! There's our word for the day.....FLACID. I think I can make a pretty good guess at how one forms this word......

Are pizzles flacid??

[DingoGirl]

Not a problem Sooze. I'll do the cloning for free, you'll just need to buy the reagents.

Susie Dear....I may be able to hook you up with some reagents.....my ID badge can access many a lab store rooms here in our Phacility.....it will be like an illegal "trade"

I don't know what reagents are, but yes, I"ll take some.

birthing a litter and nursing.......I can make SO much money that way! think of the tabloid stories......

Flaccid. Flaccid and pizzle are two phunny words.

Olympics.....I have friends protesting, but I will watch tomorrow......have only missed ONE opening ceremony (four years ago) in my whole life, when I was up in the Sierra............ but, it won't be live. Em, aren't they broadcasting it to you canucks at a reasonable hour?

[blueeyedmanda]

That front porch is big enough for an entire sillyville gathering If I do get everything in order and when I buy my first house I would like to have a celiac gathering of all my friends I met here....would anybody be interested?

[jerseyangel]

That front porch is big enough for an entire sillyville gathering If I do get everything in order and when I buy my first house I would like to have a celiac gathering of all my friends I met here....would anybody be interested?

I'll be there!

[Mtndog]

Part I

Oh my GAWD- is John's Pizzle flaccid????????

Amanda- The house is SO awesome! And the price? If that house was here- I'm guseeing about $300k, nver mind if it was on the West Coast! WOW!!!!!

..And the Hoff!!!!! Bev, you absolutely NEED this gentleman (!) on your campaign trail.......

Ahh...but Julie and I would much rather have Benicio on our tail. The Hoff, however would win ovah the Japanese anad German voters

i like the Torrie and Dean show........didn't think i would but he's so good to her.

she does seem like a sweet person and not .........well.........REALLY ..........spoiled..........just maybe alittle indulgent with her spending habbits

GOD what I could do in the thrift stores with all the mula.......$$

I HATED her on 90210 so it's nice to know she might actually be cool

LOVE figure skating! I, of course, suck at it. The combo of grace and power is just phenomenal.

Do you remember Open Original Shared Link?

I LOVE figure skating- I dream I am an amazing skater (at night) and it's so cool. I got skates for Christmas two years ago and went skating on a pond. So fun!!!!!!! Yes- I too psuck

I always loved

I remember hearing she got "propositioned" by Alberto Tomba (the Italian hot shot alpine skiier and I think she slapped him across the face :lol:

What? You guys don't like Tonya Harding? Nancy "I have a horse's teeth" Kerrigan now lives in the town I grew up in Alas, Tonya harding does not

[curlyfries]

Okay, Lisa! There's our word for the day.....FLACID. I think I can make a pretty good guess at how one forms this word......

Can't believe this word is not yet part of my repertoire! I looked thru my ASL Medical Dictionary and Signs of Sexual Behavior, to no avail. . However......I did find *impotent*, which is *erection* and *can't*, so it would make sense that *flacid* might be *not* *erection*.

For *not*, close your fist with thumb sticking up and brush the thumb from under chin, forward. ( yeah, I know....it looks like an Italian's way of flipping you off)

Now let me just say that the next word is obviously a product of some man's over-exaggerated self image.

We remember *penis*.....right?...........yeah.............not even close.

Erection

If you are right handed, put your left hand on the crook(or inside) of your right elbow. Close right hand into a fist palm side facing left, and bring it up towards your shoulder.

I think whatever Emily is imagining is probably much more entertaining!!!!!

[Mtndog]

Part Deux

yes- invade Amanda's house!!!!!!!!!! wait, she has to buy it first, right?

OOOOHHHHH>>>>>>>>Just got two very important phone calls.

1. PICC line insertion/body piercing/tattoo/branding session 10 am on Friday, August 22 (Jess loses an organ and I get a plastic one : HARUMPH: but we BOTH get good drugs!!!!!!!!!

2. My favorite florist in the world just called- someone has sent me flowers and they are COMING! Excited, excited, excited!

Suzzle's getting her PIZZLE ON!!!!!!!!!!!!!

An Annie clone? Yes- I want one!!!!!!!!!!!!!! :wub:

So glad you feel better- I'm telling you Webbutrin is either really good or REALLY bad.

Good Morning, Sillies.....!

I will be up in 24 hours with millions of others riveted to the TV, watching the opening ceremonies.

OMG......... . . .. yes, mammogram shots!

Have to make sure I post my best side........... . . ..

I'll post my colonoscopy pics too

I can't wait to watch the Olympic equestrain and gymnastics. Hope the horses don't suffocate on the smog

Lisa- I LOVE THIS:

"I had a rose named after me and I was very flattered. But I was not pleased

to read the description in the catalog: 'No good in a bed, but fine against

a wall.'-- Eleanor Roosevelt

EXCELLENT!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

[blueeyedmanda]

For the size of the house around here the price is low.....but remember it does have a nuclear plant in the back yard. Three Mile Island is in Middletown PA. Which does not bother me, since where I live and work are both in the 10 mile radius for evacuations/hazards should something go wrong there again!

[Judyin Philly]

Morning........sorry haven't even read to catch up.

just posting on last page.

That front porch is big enough for an entire sillyville gathering If I do get everything in order and when I buy my first house I would like to have a celiac gathering of all my friends I met here....would anybody be interested?

great porch........counnt me in

I'll be there!

goodie that's 2 of the group........woops did we forget something..........Amanda needs to buy it first keeping fingers and toes crossed.

I HATED her on 90210 so it's nice to know she might actually be cool

I never even watched that show.

Just heard about her in the news.

never ever thought there was much substance to her. She's had such a hard time with her mother so i feel really sorry for her

she seems like such a wonderful loving mom.

such BRILLIANT INFO SPUEING FROM MY THOUGHTS THIS AM

HUGS ALL

JUDY

[nikki-uk]

I will be up in 24 hours with millions of others riveted to the TV, watching the opening ceremonies. Dunno how early I'll have to be up to watch it live, but we're talking the polar opposite side of the earth, so it may be something heinous like 3 am er sumfin'.....I am a big phan, but come on.......

It's on at a respectable 12.45pm here but alas I shall miss it.......that coupled with a NEW series season of Law & Order (SVU) starting tomorrow night nearly made me cancel the bloomin' Turkey trip !!

But what if things went awry and you had a litter? Mygawd, the size of you, the nursing afterward....... . .. .

NOOOOooo!!!!!!!!!!

OMGAAAWD!!!! The stretch marks after a litter!!!!!!!!!! .........and let me tell ya, there's no going back once you've got them

My my---its 8:07 and no one has tickled my fancy here at work yet....are we gearing up for a quiet day with no PoopeyGaDooppey Heads???? We'll see!

...AND

Guys while I was typing Phacility I was laughing because sadly the word flacid came to my mind.....Talk about being in the gutter!

GAHHHHHHhhhhhh!!!!!

Amanda's promoting flaccidity?

Mmm, shares in viagra???

That front porch is big enough for an entire sillyville gathering If I do get everything in order and when I buy my first house I would like to have a celiac gathering of all my friends I met here....would anybody be interested?

OMG!!!!

AMANDA!!! That house is beautiful and MASSIVE!!!!

GADS!!!....my entire family would find the shed at the end of the garden roomy!!!!

Ahh...but Julie and I would much rather have Benicio on our tail. The Hoff, however would win ovah the Japanese anad German voters

Don't phorget the 'wee' lovers

Momma Goose ....good ones

[Jestgar]

1. PICC line insertion/body piercing/tattoo/branding session 10 am on Friday, August 22 (Jess loses an organ and I get a plastic one : HARUMPH: but we BOTH get good drugs!!!!!!!!!

aawww, I want a plastic organ

they those Open Original Shared Link , why not fake uteri?

[Judyin Philly]

QUOTE (Mtndog @ Aug 7 2008, 10:26 AM)

1. PICC line insertion/body piercing/tattoo/branding session 10 am on Friday, August 22 (Jess loses an organ and I get a plastic one : HARUMPH: but we BOTH get good drugs!!!!!!!!!

woops missed this

good luck honey

judy

woops...Jess is losing a organ????.....this must be a joke right???? we need our sillies........silly......losing a organ isn't funny

keep getting alets that aren't here?????? hummmmmm

blueeyedmanda has just posted a reply to a topic that you have subscribed to titled "The Funny Pages - Tickle Me Elbow".

----------------------------------------------------------------------

For the size of the house around here the price is low.....but remember it does have a nuclear plant in the back yard. Three Mile Island is in Middletown PA. Which does not bother me, since where I live and work are both in the 10 mile radius for evacuations/hazards should something go wrong there again!

----------------------------------------------------------------------

When we moved here be passed that plant on the bridge ...........and a few days later the PROBLEM OCCURED........

WOW..........

WELL STILL A GREAT PRICE.

MAYBE IT WILL GIVE YOU BEAUTIFUL FACE A GLOW...

[tom]

so now besides thinking d%$#@#$-baggery when I see debauchery, I'll replace facility w/ flaccidity??????

What are you ppl DOING TO ME??!!!??

[tom]

Oooooooh!!! 12 posts to new Royalty??

11??

[curlyfries]

they those Open Original Shared Link , why not fake uteri?

Isn't that great to have testicle implants to improve a dog's self-esteem ..........cuz those bully dogs can be unmerciful when they tease neutered dogs

[Green12]

Olympics.....I have friends protesting, but I will watch tomorrow......have only missed ONE opening ceremony (four years ago) in my whole life, when I was up in the Sierra............ but, it won't be live.

I will be watching I HEART the Olympics!!!!!!

My faves in the summer games are the swimming events of course, and gymnastics.

I LOVE figure skating- I dream I am an amazing skater (at night) and it's so cool. I got skates for Christmas two years ago and went skating on a pond. So fun!!!!!!! Yes- I too psuck

I always loved

I remember hearing she got "propositioned" by Alberto Tomba (the Italian hot shot alpine skiier and I think she slapped him across the face :lol:

What? You guys don't like Tonya Harding? Nancy "I have a horse's teeth" Kerrigan now lives in the town I grew up in Alas, Tonya harding does not

OMG!! Bev, we are separated at birth!!!!!

I loved Katarina Witt and Alberta Tomba!! That year he hit on her she skated to Carmen I believe. I so wanted them to get married and live happily ever after and have little figure skating and skiing children Or you know, I was available if that didn't work out......

Tonya Harding That whole thing with her and Nancy Kerrigan was crazy! That was the whole beginning of the tabloid train wreck phenomenon.......

Oh yes, and Surya Bonnaly (sp?) not only the most defined derrierre, but legs too.

I looked thru my ASL Medical Dictionary and Signs of Sexual Behavior, to no avail. . However......I did find *impotent*, which is *erection* and *can't*, so it would make sense that *flacid* might be *not* *erection*.

Now let me just say that the next word is obviously a product of some man's over-exaggerated self image.

We remember *penis*.....right?...........yeah.............not even close.

Erection

OMG, we are so getting in trouble

Just heard about her in the news.

never ever thought there was much substance to her. She's had such a hard time with her mother so i feel really sorry for her

she seems like such a wonderful loving mom.

I agree Judy, she's not anything like you would expect. Her mom is a nut job, kudos to her for surviving that and making the best of her life.

Don't phorget the 'wee' lovers

Good point Nikki, I phorgot the Hoff smelt of wee........and who knows about his pizzle.....he might not be a good candidate afterall.

Benicio it is!! He will make all the ladies swoon

so now besides thinking d%$#@#$-baggery when I see debauchery, I'll replace facility w/ flaccidity??????

What are you ppl DOING TO ME??!!!??

Tom