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Dealing With A Non-celiac Spouse

Camilla

By Camilla
in Coping with Celiac Disease

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Camilla Rookie
Camilla
Posted

I think I've hit a series of wrong buttons... apologies!

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Lisa Mentor
Lisa
Posted

Camilla:

In my almost 51 years, I certainly have learned that men deal with things differently then women. That is truely a duh...statement. (without the premisis of offending the men on the site, I will be specific).

My husband is one that wants a routine. He truely cares about my health, but is quite upset when things are different, not normal, not routine, not the way things used to be. I have always been the one to make things "normal", to fix things. He is a retired airline pilot and was away for 3 -4 days a week. I raised the girls, and for instance, we had Christmas when Dad could get home. I was in charge.....until he retired in 99. It has been quite the adjustment for both of us. He was used to doing what he needed to do and then headed back to work.

Without digressing too much. Husbands don't want the boat rocked very much. Maybe your husband is not ready to accept the changed that will effect your life as well as his.

My advise to you is, try to stand down (military word for backing off) and you do some cooking that is gluten-free. You can get some great recipies on this site, forum "recipies", and do some gluten free cooking for him. Trust me, he will never know that it is gluten-free. Do this for a while, then call it to his attention. In the mean time, if you have to, clean up behind him with the bread crumbs and wash you hands well, do it safely.

"If you can't go in through the front door, try the back door".

He may need some time to know that things may not be "normal" again. Give him some space.

Hope my suggestion will be helpful. ( sorry that I may have offended some husbands out there, my intent is not to make a general statement, but a personal one.) :)

Lisa B.

Lisa Mentor
Lisa
Posted

I responded to your original message........don't know where that went too....??

tarnalberry Community Regular
tarnalberry
Posted

I think the solution depends on where his difficulty stems from. Has he clearly articulated to you what his trouble is with dealing with the diet? (I too can't see the original post, so perhaps you already stated it...)

GIJane Rookie
GIJane
Posted
I responded to your original message........don't know where that went too....??

<{POST_SNAPBACK}>

I'm not sure either. I was trying to fix a typo and managed to delete the whole thing...

Lisa Mentor
Lisa
Posted

Well, can you repete your original as best you can remember. I think you will get many responses.

Give it a try.

Lisa B.

tiredofdoctors Enthusiast
tiredofdoctors
Posted

If I'm getting the jist of your topic, your husband is having a hard time "getting on board" with your gluten-free diet? I'm having the opposite problem. My husband is the one who is paranoid about the foods I eat. He has read the books more than me, and questions a LOT -- "it has ( ) in it. can you eat that?" I think it's the "fix it" mentality. When I complain with my girlfriends about something, they know that I'm just complaining. When I complain to my husband, he immediately thinks of the solution to fix it! Don't know what to tell you other than you can tell him that my husband loves my gluten-free cooking as much as my previous cooking. He honestly can't tell the difference. You may want to tell him that -- maybe it will let him know he's not alone!

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      Thank you! That's helpful. My kids eat very little processed food. Tons of fruit, vegetables, cheese, eggs and occasional red meat. We do a lot of rice and bean bowls, stir fry, etc.  Do you think with all the fruits and vegetables they need a vitamin supplement? I feel like their diet is pretty healthy and balanced with very limited processed food. The only processed food they eat regularly is a bowl of Cheerios here and there.  Could shaking legs be a symptom of just a one-time gluten exposure? I guess there's no way to know for sure if they're getting absolutely zero exposure because they do go to school a couple times a week. We do homeschool but my son does a shared school 2x a week and my daughter does a morning Pre-K 3 x a week.  At home our entire house is strictly gluten free and it is extremely rare for us to eat out. If we eat at someone else's house I usually just bring their food. When we have play dates we bring all the snacks, etc. I try to be really careful since they're still growing. They also, of course, catch kids viruses all the time so I  want to make sure I know whether they're just sick or they've had gluten. It can be pretty confusing when they're pretty young to even be explaining their symptoms! 
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