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How To Convince Someone!

annie76

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annie76 Apprentice
annie76
Posted

How do you explain this to someone, who you think may have it? Its my brothers fiance, her dad is a celiac. Matter of fact he's probably the only person I've actually met in person who has the same dx as I do. Anyhow, this girl from time to time gets big horrible mouth cankers, bad D, and gas. She's trippy as hell, I mean really moody! Anxiety, paranoia you name it. So, over the duration of their relationship her and I have developed a pretty good friendship, you know girls griping about this and that. She's got alot of the signs and has been complaining about them alot. I've explained to her how it IS genetic before, and the wide range of symptoms that come along with it. Tonight out of the blue she told me she googled the sores in her mouth and came up with celiac, or stress etc... :blink: Well, sheesh imagine that! Why in the world don't people listen to me when I talk to them about this? Its so irritating! Its not like I bring it up, or go on and on without being asked either. People ask me questions, I tell them the info. Then they ask me the same obvious question about the disease again later on...ugh! I guess people just have to suffer on their own, and go get help when they are ready, I frankly give up....well on this one anyway ;) Thanks for the rant....Julie

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tarnalberry Community Regular
tarnalberry
Posted

have you specifically said "I think it's possible you have this. Have you been tested, and if not, would you get tested and find out if this could be part of the problem?" sometimes, hints aren't enough.

annie76 Apprentice
annie76
Posted
  • Author

Yes I have...I've said look don't you think it is a little strange that your dad has celiac, and you have so many symptoms? I've said you really need to get tested, whats it going to hurt...and on and on. My mother told me once that she would rather not know, which to me is very iggnorant...When I got really bad there toward the end, I would have done anything to just know WHAT it was so it could stop and maybe I could have a normal life...Who knows, its just frustrating!

par18 Apprentice
par18
Posted

My experience has been that the majority of people with Celiac related symptoms will go to any length to eliminate every thing else first before finally coming to the realization that this may be their problem. The diet itself is a test but seems to be passed over in favor of the more expensive blood/biopsy procedures first. I have said it before that there are people out there that will not try the diet (or any test) because of fear that it "will" help and then they will have to start changing their lifestyle.

A person who becomes so ill or fed up with dealing with the symptoms is the best candidate to listen to what you have to say. It is sad that if someone (doctor, etc.) is actually looking for this then the diagnosis could be much sooner.

My advice to someone when facing this situation is for you to focus on the positives of this lifestyle change and let them know it is something that can be done. Act as normal as possible and let them see it does not dominate your life. If this is her problem then sooner or later with or without your help she will have come around.

Tom

tarnalberry Community Regular
tarnalberry
Posted
Yes I have...I've said look don't you think it is a little strange that your dad has celiac, and you have so many symptoms? I've said you really need to get tested, whats it going to hurt...and on and on. My mother told me once that she would rather not know, which to me is very iggnorant...When I got really bad there toward the end, I would have done anything to just know WHAT it was so it could stop and maybe I could have a normal life...Who knows, its just frustrating!

then you have done all you can do. there is nothing else in your control. that person's health is their own business. you can choose to say that you won't listen to the complaints any more, as it's fairly obvious to you that she's being self-destructive, but that's "politically incorrect" to many people. ;)

annie76 Apprentice
annie76
Posted
  • Author

Thats how I see it too, I've done all I can do. It just hits a nerve every time I hear yet another symptom come up every couple of months or so, sometimes less. She even went in awhile ago for a stomach xray or something like that, because it was bothering her so much. I just really feel like I'm witnessing someone be sick when its not necessary, I want to help, but I can't. Ugh.

DebNC84 Apprentice
DebNC84
Posted
Thats how I see it too, I've done all I can do. It just hits a nerve every time I hear yet another symptom come up every couple of months or so, sometimes less. She even went in awhile ago for a stomach xray or something like that, because it was bothering her so much. I just really feel like I'm witnessing someone be sick when its not necessary, I want to help, but I can't. Ugh.

I'll bet if she develops DH- she'll listen!! I almost went nuts with it. I didn't know cankers were celiac related... yet another thing i've had all my life and dealt with it. (i'm 45) A new day is dawning for sure. No more gas - no more migraines - no more rashes - no more ankle swelling - maybe I can get pregnant now - AND NO MORE MOUTH CANKERS!! My goodness.. does that mean I'll be NORMAL!!

(Just in case you are wondering- i just became gluten free 1 1/2 weeks ago, a desperate attempt to get rid of a super bad rash that I've been suffering with since last september - IT WORKED ! )

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annie76 Apprentice
annie76
Posted
  • Author
I'll bet if she develops DH- she'll listen!! I almost went nuts with it. I didn't know cankers were celiac related... yet another thing i've had all my life and dealt with it. (i'm 45) A new day is dawning for sure. No more gas - no more migraines - no more rashes - no more ankle swelling - maybe I can get pregnant now - AND NO MORE MOUTH CANKERS!! My goodness.. does that mean I'll be NORMAL!!

(Just in case you are wondering- i just became gluten free 1 1/2 weeks ago, a desperate attempt to get rid of a super bad rash that I've been suffering with since last september - IT WORKED ! )

Ya, I never had the cankers, I learned about them here. I had one day out of the blue strange chest pain, which ended up being my intestine actually. From there came the constant D, horrible fatigue, and my weight fell to 20 lbs below anything I'd ever weighed before...I just hope my friend will eventually get a test, I'd hate to watch someone go through that before my eyes.

DebNC84 Apprentice
DebNC84
Posted
Ya, I never had the cankers, I learned about them here. I had one day out of the blue strange chest pain, which ended up being my intestine actually. From there came the constant D, horrible fatigue, and my weight fell to 20 lbs below anything I'd ever weighed before...I just hope my friend will eventually get a test, I'd hate to watch someone go through that before my eyes.

I have to convince my daughter (25yrs) that her migraines - stomach cramps - and cankers may be gluten induced... my sister says I'm freaking her out... she doesn't want to have this but I think that she may have an intolerance to a degree. I'll not say anymore to her.. she's smart - she'll check it out. :) I just want my family to be informed - :huh:

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