Back To School Tonight... 10 Yrs Later

[ravenwoodglass]

Well I am a bit nervous. I know I shouldn't be but I am. I am not nervous about school, I know I can do well and finally get that degree finished. What I am nervous about is that this is the first time since diagnosis, yep in almost 6 yrs, that I will be going anyplace after having food in my tummy during the day. I handled my constant D for years with meds and by not eating anything at all until I was home for the night even if I was working a split shift and didn't get home till 10pm or later. After diagnosis this habit developed into what seemed to be almost agoraphobia and then the last couple of years got even more restrictive till the only time I left the house was to go to the store. It hasn't been easy to fight, in fact I almost went the drug route but I have been fighting it on my own consiously for a few months now. I can now have breakfast or lunch and walk my dog without any anxiety but being by myself and able to get out of whereever I am has been a saving grace. I went to the school today and scoped stuff out so I would be comfy and know where everything is. I did chicken out and will wait till after class for dinner but I did have a late lunch. Wish me luck and calmness folks if you could.

[jerseyangel]

Oh Ravenwood--I just know you're going to do fine, and I wish you all the luck and calmness in the world!!

I can relate to exactly what you are going through--I haven't reached a point yet where I feel comfortable with committing to anything where I have to be present on a regular basis--but you give me hope!

How exciting for you to be able to get your degree--I'm so happy for you

[neesee]

Ravenwoodglass, Wishing you good luck and serenity.

I know what you're going through. You sound a lot like me. You'll be fine.

neesee

[Phyllis28]

You'll do just fine. If it makes you feel more at ease, choose a seat by the door so you can leave and re-enter, if necessary, without disturbing the rest of the class.

If you have not already done so, you can might want to sign up with the disabiltity office since Celiac is covered by the ADA and they can put into place the accomodations you need. Possibly, leave during class (in case you get a teacher who objects) and arranging to take tests at a different time and location. If you wish to do this you will need to check with the schools disability office to find out what paperwork they need.

My son is registered with the Community College disability office (not for celiac) he attends (State of CA). All the students registered with the disabilty office get priority registration. I am not sure if this is the same is all states.

Schools are not gluten free enviorments so you may want to consider carrying along something like baby wipes to clean surfaces (desks, tables, chairs) that look suspect.

I am sure everything will go well for you.

[ravenwoodglass]

I made it. I did get there early so I could lay claim to a spot by the door. I will do that with tommorrows class also. It seems to me at times that the psychological trauma from the junk we deal with before diagnosis is even harder to heal than the body. If that makes sense.

I WILL get my life back. I WILL I WILL I WILL (stomping feet) And it will be better than before.

Today a class, perhaps next week a movie and maybe someday I will even date again.

Thanks for the good thoughts everyone.

[Juliebove]

Sounds like you are doing better! I spent several years avoiding any food related things, for different reasons. I have diabetes and food allergies. I also have medical conditions that leave me disabled. I can go some places, but others are just too difficult for me to manage. I used to stay within 2 miles of my home, going only to the grocery or drugstore or Dr. I eventually got to the point where I could venture out further and do more things.

I currently own one box of Immodium and I should probably check the date on it to make sure it isn't expired! Can't remember the last time I used it. Before I knew about the food allergies, it was my best friend. Most days I took the maximum dose and sometimes even more.

[jerseyangel]

I made it. I did get there early so I could lay claim to a spot by the door. I will do that with tommorrows class also. It seems to me at times that the psychological trauma from the junk we deal with before diagnosis is even harder to heal than the body. If that makes sense.

I WILL get my life back. I WILL I WILL I WILL (stomping feet) And it will be better than before.

Today a class, perhaps next week a movie and maybe someday I will even date again.

Thanks for the good thoughts everyone.

[missy'smom]

Yeah for you! I understand a bit how you feel and what a victory it is. I've always had anxiety about certain things but it got worse after something I went through not long ago and I'm fighting my way back to normal one meeting/ outing at a time. A not so close friend observed accurately that I don't feel safe. Thank you for your honesty and willing to be vulnerable in sharing.

[Lisa]

I WILL get my life back. I WILL I WILL I WILL (stomping feet)

xxoo

[blueeyedmanda]

Congrats on going to get your degree!!!! Don't worry everything will be fine

[GFinDC]

Congratulations Ravenwoodglass on making the world your oyster!

[JNBunnie1]

I made it. I did get there early so I could lay claim to a spot by the door. I will do that with tommorrows class also. It seems to me at times that the psychological trauma from the junk we deal with before diagnosis is even harder to heal than the body. If that makes sense.

I WILL get my life back. I WILL I WILL I WILL (stomping feet) And it will be better than before.

Today a class, perhaps next week a movie and maybe someday I will even date again.

Thanks for the good thoughts everyone.

I know EXACTLY how you feel and I think you ROCK!!!!!!

[gfp]

Well done and good luck.

I really would take Phyllis's advice onboard!

I think its generally polite in a lecture to say if you have to leave but .... there are certain limits. If you bring this up when you have time get it all sorted and above board then you can have the door seat reserved (officially but quietly and without fuss) and then if you need to leave you can just leave and the lecturer will know why and not ask embarassing questions.

Another bonus is you could get access to staff/disabled loo's.

[kbtoyssni]

Congrats on going back to school and good luck! I was one semester away from graduating from grad school when I had to drop out due to undiagnosed celiac. In the next year I figured out my diagnosis, my body healed, I got my life back on track and got a full-time job, then went back to grad school one class at a time while working. It took me four years to finish instead of the originally planned sixteen months, but as you can see from my avatar, I finally finished! Going back to school isn't easy, but when you finally do walk across that stage and get your diploma, it's about so much more than the degree. It's a symbol of a life back on track. Good luck and hang in there!

[ravenwoodglass]

Thanks for all the support and encouragement guys. I had gotten so restricted by the beginning of this year that I wondered more than once why I bothered still being on this earth. Even though my consious mind knows I am okay now and have nothing to worry about the subconcious would still kick in every time I tried to do anything. I wanted to do things with my family so bad and then it would get closeto time to go and the old tapes would play. It has been a struggle but I AM going to win it. Everytime I force myself to do something it gets a little easier.

I will be at the main campus tonight and am going early so I can check in with the Disability Office. Some proffessors have really strict rules on testing and absences and although I don't think I will have any issues it would be best to let them in on things. I did let my instructor know last night and she was really good. I didn't have to explain anything I just showed her the celiac tag on my key ring. It was nice not to have to explain.

I figured I would take a wet paper towel with me to my classes to wipe my desk with before I sit down. Most don't allow food in the class but better safe than sorry.

These last few months have been a lot of work. I didn't think the first day I forced myself to sit on the front porch that I would get this far. I still have a long way to go but I finally feel like perhaps there will be a productive life in from me after all.

[Judyin Philly]

yes you will get your life back

look how great your starting out

it's scary in the 'big world' out there I so agree but your doing it

Everytime I force myself to do something it gets a little easier.

I will be at the main campus tonight and am going early so I can check in with the Disability Office.

I didn't have to explain anything I just showed her the celiac tag on my key ring. It was nice not to have to explain.

I figured I would take a wet paper towel with me to my classes to wipe my desk with before I sit down.

These last few months have been a lot of work. I didn't think the first day I forced myself to sit on the front porch that I would get this far.

I still have a long way to go but I finally feel like perhaps there will be a productive life in from me after all.

So many great points here.

CVS sells little packs of 'wipes' you can stick in your purse too

from the PORCH to the classroom to the BOARD ROOM..........YOU ROCK.

JUDY