Weight Gain :(

[WinterSong]

My back story: I have always been a petite person. I'm 5'4 and in my mid 20's. In high school I was borderline anorexic, and my lowest weight was 107. I got back to 112, which is a much healthier weight for me and stayed there for several years. In the final few months before my diagnosis my weight suddenly dropped. I was down to 106 and was eating a ton of food. I got my weight back up to 111, which is my comfortable weight. Since going gluten free, I've gained a few pounds. Maybe some of it is from slight over-indulging on my favorite health foods. Maybe it's partly eating late at night when I get home from work (I am trying very hard to stop). Some of it may come from the occasional constipation I still get. My thyroid is fine, I am a dancer/fitness instructor, and I weight train.

But my jeans are getting too tight. I normally fluctuate between a size 0 and 1. (I should probably mention that I'm an actress/dancer, as well, and I need to stay fit so that I can continue to get work in the types of roles that I play). Lately I've weighed 115, and it's slightly uncomfortable. On my small frame I can feel those few extra pounds (it's all in my stomach), and unfortunately I know that I do have some self-confidence issues left over from my borderline anorexia.

I called my mom today and told her that I think I need to not be a size 0/1 anymore and should start shopping for new jeans. I'm visiting her in May, so I'm giving myself until then to see if I can get back down to 111. If not we're going shopping. I don't know if my pre-diagnosis weight is realistic anymore, since it was probably Celiac that was keeping me at that weight. My mom says that my body is also probably just continuing to mature. I know five pounds isn't a big deal, I just wish I felt more comfortable.

Sorry for the rambling. Just felt like I wanted to talk about it, and I love how supportive this community is.

[JoyfulGF]

I'm sorry Winter for the trouble you're having. I do want to encourage you though because even at 115, you're still in the normal weight range for your height. I think if you were 111 again, you would be borderline underweight. I also think it's very unhealthy for a job to ask that much of you. If it's just you being worried about it and no one else cares (ie your coworkers or boss) then just realize your body is finally doing what it's suppose to be doing.

I hope I've encouraged you.

[Candicep]

My back story: I have always been a petite person. I'm 5'4 and in my mid 20's. In high school I was borderline anorexic, and my lowest weight was 107. I got back to 112, which is a much healthier weight for me and stayed there for several years. In the final few months before my diagnosis my weight suddenly dropped. I was down to 106 and was eating a ton of food. I got my weight back up to 111, which is my comfortable weight. Since going gluten free, I've gained a few pounds. Maybe some of it is from slight over-indulging on my favorite health foods. Maybe it's partly eating late at night when I get home from work (I am trying very hard to stop). Some of it may come from the occasional constipation I still get. My thyroid is fine, I am a dancer/fitness instructor, and I weight train.

But my jeans are getting too tight. I normally fluctuate between a size 0 and 1. (I should probably mention that I'm an actress/dancer, as well, and I need to stay fit so that I can continue to get work in the types of roles that I play). Lately I've weighed 115, and it's slightly uncomfortable. On my small frame I can feel those few extra pounds (it's all in my stomach), and unfortunately I know that I do have some self-confidence issues left over from my borderline anorexia.

I called my mom today and told her that I think I need to not be a size 0/1 anymore and should start shopping for new jeans. I'm visiting her in May, so I'm giving myself until then to see if I can get back down to 111. If not we're going shopping. I don't know if my pre-diagnosis weight is realistic anymore, since it was probably Celiac that was keeping me at that weight. My mom says that my body is also probably just continuing to mature. I know five pounds isn't a big deal, I just wish I felt more comfortable.

Sorry for the rambling. Just felt like I wanted to talk about it, and I love how supportive this community is.

I understand what you are going through. I struggled with bulimia until I was 23. Im 29 now. I am also about 5'4". I think the lowest I got down to was 117lbs and I looked sickly. I have a small/medium build. I wear between a size 3 and 5. People say that im small. I have never in my life worn a 0-1...well maybe when I was a kid but that doesnt count. You must be a super small framed lady. Bulimia is a bit different than anorexia though. Most bulimics maintain a normal weight. You could tell I was sick. Im currently 123lbs. I fluctuate between 118-126ish (126, i feel huge but my bf says I look thin and fit) I still struggle with the "im never going to get fat" anxiety. I wish I could get down to 115lbs. Ive been "cured" since 2005 though. Ive just found out about my gluten issues this past year. Now that I think about it, I wonder if this gluten sensitivity (not sure if its celiac, dont have insurance to test) had something to do with my eating disorder.

I can't possibly see you looking big at 115. I bet you look great. Sometimes gaining in certain areas make you look even more beautiful. I tend to gain in my stomach, unfortunately.

Anyway, I understand your struggles. I get anxiety when I gain. I try to remember that if I eat healthy, eat the junk food in moderation, and stay active, my body will conform to what it naturally needs to be at. Don't try to force your body to be something it wasn't meant to be. In my honest opinion, most people in the world would be at a healthy/fit weight if they just ate what nature provided them in basic means: aka fruits, veggies, meats, nutts. Sadly ppl have created some REALLY delicious things that are hard to avoid in our every day life.

Dont freak out, just take care of yourself/give your body the nutrition it needs and you'll be just fine.

[WinterSong]

I understand what you are going through. I struggled with bulimia until I was 23. Im 29 now. I am also about 5'4". I think the lowest I got down to was 117lbs and I looked sickly. I have a small/medium build. I wear between a size 3 and 5. People say that im small. I have never in my life worn a 0-1...well maybe when I was a kid but that doesnt count. You must be a super small framed lady. Bulimia is a bit different than anorexia though. Most bulimics maintain a normal weight. You could tell I was sick. Im currently 123lbs. I fluctuate between 118-126ish (126, i feel huge but my bf says I look thin and fit) I still struggle with the "im never going to get fat" anxiety. I wish I could get down to 115lbs. Ive been "cured" since 2005 though. Ive just found out about my gluten issues this past year. Now that I think about it, I wonder if this gluten sensitivity (not sure if its celiac, dont have insurance to test) had something to do with my eating disorder.

I can't possibly see you looking big at 115. I bet you look great. Sometimes gaining in certain areas make you look even more beautiful. I tend to gain in my stomach, unfortunately.

Anyway, I understand your struggles. I get anxiety when I gain. I try to remember that if I eat healthy, eat the junk food in moderation, and stay active, my body will conform to what it naturally needs to be at. Don't try to force your body to be something it wasn't meant to be. In my honest opinion, most people in the world would be at a healthy/fit weight if they just ate what nature provided them in basic means: aka fruits, veggies, meats, nutts. Sadly ppl have created some REALLY delicious things that are hard to avoid in our every day life.

Dont freak out, just take care of yourself/give your body the nutrition it needs and you'll be just fine.

Thanks so much for the reply! It's nice to know that other people can relate. Unfortunately I gain weight in my stomach, too, but my boyfriend says that my body is perfect the way it is (even without me asking, haha). I think that once I buy new/bigger jeans that aren't so tight around my stomach I'll feel better about where I'm at. Too-small-jeans never make anyone feel good.

Thanks again for the reply!