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Not Wanting To Attend Any Social Functions Involving Food

Shanmegjilal

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tarnalberry Community Regular
tarnalberry
Posted

Thank you so much for all of the input.I'm trying so hard to not let this ruin my life but instead of getting better at dealing I feel like it's getting harder.I just feel like EVERYTHING involves food.I go and pretend I'm fine but inside I'm so upset...It's definitely the psychological part of this disease that's wearing on me.I guess somedays are better than others and I don't want people to not include me yet I just dread anything where food is involved....If I don't want to go to someone's party because I feel awkward and just don't feel like explaining my restrictions is that ok or am I giving in to this??? What excuses can I use to not go without saying "my diet"? Thank you

 

Same thing I tell my 3-year old.  "Wheat makes me sick.  So I don't eat it."  End of story, really.  If they press, you can either take the "it's called celiac disease, and it's an autoimmune reaction that damages the intestines preventing me from absorbing nutrients in food leaving me very sick" route or the "I'm totally tired of talking about my medical history.  How was your weekend?" route.  Short, sweet, SIMPLE, but honest.

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Renaye Contributor
Renaye
Posted

I don't like to go to parties either. The ones that bother me the most is going to my in-laws where food is heaven and everyone tries to go on a diet.. My kids always come home feeling sick. I am amazed of my attitude towards food now because there are really so many foods that is unhealthy. Even my kids notice the difference. What bothers me the most is that my mother in-law really tries to accomodate me by fixing me a baked potato, plain grilled meat and takes some vegetable out before dumping a sauce over it for me as I am diary free also. So I have this plate of food sitting on the counter, plain, while everyone is filling there plate with "real" food. It makes for a long day when you are there for both meals.

So the "tables turned" when I had my son's b-day party and I could eat almost everything. No one could believe it!!!

My suggestion is that if you don't feel comfortable, stay at home, just as long as your immediate family is ok with it. "I have other plans" should be enough for a social gathering but find something to do if you don't go because sitting at home and thinking about it will not be good for you either.

Sometimes when it is a long function, I would come later. It will get easier. I am still dealing with it. Bring a side dish that is inexpensive to share that you can make a meal on. No one may notice the difference or as suggested before, eat something before. I am still struggling with vacations. So far I booked a suite and it is a few blocks from Trader Joes, so I hope I am in good shape for my trip to Chicago!! Good Luck!!

Renaye

cap6 Enthusiast
cap6
Posted

Perfect. I've found it's all in the attitude.

But I hate. And I do mean HATE "I'm sorry", or "oh, that's terrible". You know what's terrible??? Being sick. And listening to other people who are sick, when they complain of symptoms that you know have a strong chance of being food related (and watching them shove that food down their throats).

That's terrible. That's who I feel sorry for.

Me, I'm BETTER!

Amen!!!    Ahhh  the replies the float thru my mind as I am smiling.......   lol!

Carolann444 Rookie
Carolann444
Posted

I know how you are feeling.  I have been on the diet again now for a few months.  After being told I don't have celiac to now finding a good doctor who has diagnosed me with celiac.  I feel great when I am on the diet.  But it gets old when people bring food into work, or everyone wants to go out to eat, or you go to a wedding and there is everything you can't eat, etc, etc.  I feel like I don't want to do anything either because I have very severe reactions and I can't afford, not like any of us can, a mistake with food.  It is difficult and I guess it gets easier but sometimes I feel like I just don't know what to do and I"m not prepared.

Hello, I have been going to parties,BBQ's,etc for the last few years since being dx'd but now I have started to decline invitations because I find it so hard to go and watch everyone else eat and comment on how good everything tastes and  having to pretend it doesn't bother me. I find it's easier to eat at home first rather than bring my own food to events because it's hard to heat it etc. with a lot of people around and I've had people ask to try my food,etc!!!.  People ask what they can get for me to have and can't understand why I won't use their grill,etc.I just don't like explaining it all the time....I guess i"m kind of burnt out from this!! I try but I feel like I'm becoming more and more antisocial....Anyone else go through this? Thanks

Carolann444 Rookie
Carolann444
Posted

I got sick of the social awkwardness that comes with bringing your own food or having to explain, so I stopped going. I'm not really involved in much that would require me to go, (I don't do church or anything like that) so it's usually not a big deal for me. When I have social eating functions, I have them at my house and I cook everything. If friends want to pitch in, I have them bring the raw ingredients and help me cook.

 

It isn't ideal, and I'll admit that I've become pretty depressed about the state of my life. I miss eating in restaurants, being normal...etc. I also am in recovery from an eating disorder that I developed as a result of gluten making me fear food. Since being in recovery, things have gotten a little better. I'm trying not to fear and just to trust that things will be okay if I do eat something. I'm also looking into enzymes that might (although I don't want to get my hopes up) help protect me from trace amounts from cross contamination. My main goal is to be able to eat out again.

Oh wow, I have had similiar things happen to me.  I was afraid to eat for awhile and lost weight and my doctor really got onto me about it!  I think that snapped me out of it some but I still think food is evil lol.  I had wondered if anyone else goes through this too.  I really need to be able to talk with others with celiac since no one around me seems to understand the severity of it.  And it seems I explain over and over and people don't get it.  I don't blame them though since I didn't understand it when I first learned about it.  I told someone the other day, you don't know what its like to go to a restaurant and see people pick up a menu and order whatever they want!  I know its healthier but it does make me feel like a freak or something.

christianmom247 Explorer
christianmom247
Posted

I was diagnosed with celiac over a year ago, and it's still hard to sit and watch everyone else eat food that I can't touch.  But it's no ones' fault--it's just the way it is.  I have this problem, but so many others I know have bigger burdens to bear.  So I just bring my own food, tell people honestly why I can't eat what's served, and count my blessings that the gluten-free diet has made me healthy again!

karichelle Newbie
karichelle
Posted

When we had my mother-in-law's birthday party, my husband and I volunteered to bring the cake. We got a gluten-free & vegan cake from an awesome bakery (the same one who made my bday cake last year) and took it, and everyone loved it.

 

This could be a good strategy for family events.

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