Jump to content

  • Welcome to Celiac.com!

    You have found your celiac tribe! Join us and ask questions in our forum, share your story, and connect with others.



  • Celiac.com Sponsor (A1):

    Celiac.com Sponsor (A1-M):

  • Get Celiac.com Updates:
    Support Our Content
    eNewsletter
    Donate

Dating

steadiedwaters

Recommended Posts

steadiedwaters Newbie
steadiedwaters
Posted

I don't know about the rest of you, but eating out when you're dating someone knew is not fun! This guy I went out with a few times loves to order dessert--which is usually chocolate cake. I feel so bad not eating it--almost as though I'm being rude. I still haven't told him that I avoid wheat and gluten. I don't want him to think that I'm strange or that it's all in my head--my own family don't believe me, but my symptoms are very real...

Celiac.com Sponsor (A8):
Celiac.com Sponsor (A8):

Celiac.com Sponsor (A8-M):


frenchiemama Collaborator
frenchiemama
Posted

Is this a guy that you are interested in? If so, I would just tell him. Imagine if you guys ended up in a relationship and he found out that you were hiding something from him, wouldn't that be kind of weird? It's not like you have to go around telling everyone your complete medical history, but if you like this guy there is no reason to be afraid. Worse case scenario, he acts like an ass and you don't waste any more time with him. My bet is that he will be understanding.

beazly Newbie
beazly
Posted

about 4 years ago i was with a guy who didn't believe that i had celiac (he said it was in my head and that my mother brainwashed me into believing i was sick so she could control me) he even went so far as to purposely prepare food with gluten in them. my point is that he was not right for me. no matter what i would have done/said he wouldn't have understood.

now i am with a person who is understanding and supportive. he tries to come up with new foods and dishes for us to eat together and has no problem eating my gluten-free pasta even though he was raised on authentic italian cuisine.

my point? tell him. if he doesn't understand then that is his problem, not yours. i've been gluten free for over 20 years (i found out very young) and generally people don't get offended, they are just constantly astonished and curious

KaitiUSA Enthusiast
KaitiUSA
Posted

If he is really a guy worth pursuing it will not be a big deal. So what if you can't have certain food...that should not make a difference in a relationship. If he doesn't understand then you know he is not for you. You should really tell him though.

ianm Apprentice
ianm
Posted

I would tell him right away and if doesn't get it or like it kick him to the curb right then and there. I was married to someone who didn't get it and you do not want to be involved with someone like that.

printmaker81 Rookie
printmaker81
Posted

Steadiedwaters~

I can identify with your fear of making a bad first impression. The last thing I want anyone to think of me as is the wierd sick girl (especially since I am still in the healing phase). I'm about to move to a school where I will share a kitchen with 14 other people, so it's a must to say something early. It's not fun, but it's one of those things we have to do, swallow our fear and just let it out. In reality, it's a bigger deal for us because we feel singled out. If you had an allergy to nuts, and he offered you carrot cake, wouldn't you just tell him? It is uncomfortable because I feel like I have to explain myself because so few people know what Celiac is, and then once I've gone through my explanation I feel like I've made a big deal about it. It's especially important to tell him if you're going to be eating out a lot. Wouldn't you rather him think you're being careful rather than being picky? Good luck.

Lmckenney Newbie
Lmckenney
Posted
I don't know about the rest of you, but eating out when you're dating someone knew is not fun! This guy I went out with a few times loves to order dessert--which is usually chocolate cake. I feel so bad not eating it--almost as though I'm being rude. I still haven't told him that I avoid wheat and gluten. I don't want him to think that I'm strange or that it's all in my head--my own family don't believe me, but my symptoms are very real...

<{POST_SNAPBACK}>

Celiac.com Sponsor (A8):
Celiac.com Sponsor (A8):

Celiac.com Sponsor (A8-M):


Misa Rookie
Misa
Posted

I'm single and facing the same issue as you. Going gluten-free has given me alot more energy and I'm finally taking an interest in guys again :wub: and of course thinking of how to approach the gluten subject while dating.

I figure my attitude towards the disease will have a direct affect on how others react (ok, some people just are who they are ;) ). If I don't make a huge deal out of if, I'm hoping the guy I'm dating won't either. Naturally you wanto give a good impression....flaws are saved for later lol, so I thought I'd give it a mention after kindly telling the waiter to leave out such and such foods from the meal (which seems to be the norm). And swiftly move on to another topic. This is instead of saying "I feel I need to tell you that I have celiac disease......" I don't think celiac disease will make any difference to a guy if he's really into you. Also, I'm thinking if you portray (even if it might not be the case) that it doesn't bother you (you're getting on with your life) and you're fully in control of the situation, he'll be fine and relaxed about it too......or so he should be :D

Misa

Archived

This topic is now archived and is closed to further replies.

Go to topic listing
  • Celiac.com Sponsor (A19):


  • Member Statistics

    • Total Members
      131,902
    • Most Online (within 30 mins)
      7,748
    Patty6133
    Newest Member
    Patty6133
    Joined
  • Celiac.com Sponsor (A20):

  • Forum Statistics

    • Total Topics
      121.4k
    • Total Posts
      1m
  • Celiac.com Sponsor (A22):



  • Celiac.com Sponsor (A21):


  • Upcoming Events

  • Posts

    • Xravith
      Taking Probiotics but Still Getting Sick After Gluten – Advice?

      By Xravith · Posted

      Yes, you are right. Indeed, I’ve been feeling anemic since the beginning of this week, and today I felt horrible during a lecture at the university, I was trembling a lot and felt all my body incredibly heavy, so I had to come back home. I’ll do a blood test tomorrow, but I’m just worried about the possibility of it coming back negative. I’ve been eating two cookies in the morning as my only source of gluten over the past two weeks—could that affect the final result?
    • trents
      New (possible) celiac diagnosis

      By trents · Posted

      Welcome to the forum, @Judy M! Yes, he definitely needs to continue eating gluten until the day of the endoscopy. Not sure why the GI doc advised otherwise but it was a bum steer.  Celiac disease has a genetic component but also an "epigenetic" component. Let me explain. There are two main genes that have been identified as providing the "potential" to develop "active" celiac disease. We know them as HLA-DQ 2.5 (aka, HLA-DQ 2) and HLA-DQ8. Without one or both of these genes it is highly unlikely that a person will develop celiac disease at some point in their life. About 40% of the general population carry one or both of these two genes but only about 1% of the population develops active celiac disease. Thus, possessing the genetic potential for celiac disease is far less than deterministic. Most who have the potential never develop the disease. In order for the potential to develop celiac disease to turn into active celiac disease, some triggering stress event or events must "turn on" the latent genes. This triggering stress event can be a viral infection, some other medical event, or even prolonged psychological/emotional trauma. This part of the equation is difficult to quantify but this is the epigenetic dimension of the disease. Epigenetics has to do with the influence that environmental factors and things not coded into the DNA itself have to do in "turning on" susceptible genes. And this is why celiac disease can develop at any stage of life. Celiac disease is an autoimmune condition (not a food allergy) that causes inflammation in the lining of the small bowel. The ingestion of gluten causes the body to attack the cells of this lining which, over time, damages and destroys them, impairing the body's ability to absorb nutrients since this is the part of the intestinal track responsible for nutrient absorption and also causing numerous other food sensitivities such as dairy/lactose intolerance. There is another gluten-related disorder known as NCGS (Non Celiac Gluten Sensitivity or just, "gluten sensitivity") that is not autoimmune in nature and which does not damage the small bowel lining. However, NCGS shares many of the same symptoms with celiac disease such as gas, bloating, and diarrhea. It is also much more common than celiac disease. There is no test for NCGS so, because they share common symptoms, celiac disease must first be ruled out through formal testing for celiac disease. This is where your husband is right now. It should also be said that some experts believe NCGS can transition into celiac disease. I hope this helps.
    • Judy M
      New (possible) celiac diagnosis

      By Judy M · Posted

      My husband has had lactose intolerance for his entire life (he's 68 yo).  So, he's used to gastro issues. But for the past year he's been experiencing bouts of diarrhea that last for hours.  He finally went to his gastroenterologist ... several blood tests ruled out other maladies, but his celiac results are suspect.  He is scheduled for an endoscopy and colonoscopy in 2 weeks.  He was told to eat "gluten free" until the tests!!!  I, and he know nothing about this "diet" much less how to navigate his in daily life!! The more I read, the more my head is spinning.  So I guess I have 2 questions.  First, I read on this website that prior to testing, eat gluten so as not to compromise the testing!  Is that true? His primary care doctor told him to eat gluten free prior to testing!  I'm so confused.  Second, I read that celiac disease is genetic or caused by other ways such as surgery.  No family history but Gall bladder removal 7 years ago, maybe?  But how in God's name does something like this crop up and now is so awful he can't go a day without worrying.  He still works in Manhattan and considers himself lucky if he gets there without incident!  Advice from those who know would be appreciated!!!!!!!!!!!!
    • Scott Adams
      Patiently Waiting to See Results

      By Scott Adams · Posted

      You've done an excellent job of meticulously tracking the rash's unpredictable behavior, from its symmetrical spread and stubborn scabbing to the potential triggers you've identified, like the asthma medication and dietary changes. It's particularly telling that the rash seems to flare with wheat consumption, even though your initial blood test was negative—as you've noted, being off wheat before a test can sometimes lead to a false negative, and your description of the other symptoms—joint pain, brain fog, stomach issues—is very compelling. The symmetry of the rash is a crucial detail that often points toward an internal cause, such as an autoimmune response or a systemic reaction, rather than just an external irritant like a plant or mites. I hope your doctor tomorrow takes the time to listen carefully to all of this evidence you've gathered and works with you to find some real answers and effective relief. Don't be discouraged if the rash fluctuates; your detailed history is the most valuable tool you have for getting an accurate diagnosis.
    • Scott Adams
      Gluten free beer ?

      By Scott Adams · Posted

      In this case the beer is excellent, but for those who are super sensitive it is likely better to go the full gluten-free beer route. Lakefront Brewery (another sponsor!) has good gluten-free beer made without any gluten ingredients.
×
×
  • Create New...

Important Information

NOTICE: This site places This site places cookies on your device (Cookie settings). on your device. Continued use is acceptance of our Terms of Use, and Privacy Policy.