Feeling Anxious

[kittty]

Uggg, I hate feeling anxious. This time it isn't gluten related either.

I was browsing through Craigslist on my lunchbreak, and saw an ad for what looks like my husband's job. He actually found the job through Craigslist originally, and it makes me nervous to see something so similar just sitting there. He's had no disciplinary issues at work, he gets along with everyone, and no one has ever had cause to complain about the quality of his work. So why do I feel so anxious? It's very possible that another company just took the wording of his ad for a similar job and changed it around a little (it's pretty generic), but rational thoughts won't get through.

I'm seriously freaking out, just in case his boss has decided to replace him without warning for some reason. Why do I always expect the worst?

I called him up about it, and he reassured me that he has no vibes about being let go, but he said he would ask a buddy in the office to put my mind at ease. Urk, I feel sick just thinking about it.

[GF Lover]

Hi Kitty.

There is actually a term for what you are doing. It's catastrophising. As in catastrophic thinking patterns. On the severe side, the scenario plays in you head over and over with different but bad endings. It can effect the nervous system. Anxiety, depression, emotional outbursts like crying, upset stomach, etc.

The reasons for this thinking pattern can be numerous and it is extremely difficult to deal with or over come it. It doesn't matter that you rationally know you are doing it, it can still happen. I think it's probably what people call a "worry wart) .

Try to relax, know why your doing it and do your best to get thru it.

I only know this stuff because I'm a severe case but at least I know it.

Good luck

[beachbirdie]

Uggg, I hate feeling anxious. This time it isn't gluten related either.

I was browsing through Craigslist on my lunchbreak, and saw an ad for what looks like my husband's job. He actually found the job through Craigslist originally, and it makes me nervous to see something so similar just sitting there. He's had no disciplinary issues at work, he gets along with everyone, and no one has ever had cause to complain about the quality of his work. So why do I feel so anxious? It's very possible that another company just took the wording of his ad for a similar job and changed it around a little (it's pretty generic), but rational thoughts won't get through.

I'm seriously freaking out, just in case his boss has decided to replace him without warning for some reason. Why do I always expect the worst?

I called him up about it, and he reassured me that he has no vibes about being let go, but he said he would ask a buddy in the office to put my mind at ease. Urk, I feel sick just thinking about it.

I sometimes have the same problem! It is really scary to be sitting and thinking about all the things that can go wrong. Has your husband been in his job long? Has he has more than one recent period of unemployment? Those things can make one quite a bit more anxious. We've been through a lot of employment uncertainty during recent years, and it can really affect the nerves! It's even harder when there's no one you can talk to about it. Glad you posted.

{{{hugs!}}}

[kittty]

Thanks for the responses. Just hearing that word "catastrophising" actually helped, because it put things in perspective.

And yes, he has been through periods of unemployment over the past few years. He was laid off when the economy went south, and then was underemployed for a while, and then he got a new job but was let go within two weeks because the manager wanted to hire a buddy of hers instead (that REALLY sucked! I've never had such an anxiety attack before or since), then he had a temp job which ended after four months. It was two years of hell. Now he has some stability, and this job is something he really enjoys. He's had nothing but compliments for the bosses, but there's still an irrational zone in my brain that won't go away.

They have talked about the possibility of hiring a second person to work under him, because they are getting busy. Maybe it's that.

[GF Lover]

Thanks for the responses. Just hearing that word "catastrophising" actually helped, because it put things in perspective.

And yes, he has been through periods of unemployment over the past few years. He was laid off when the economy went south, and then was underemployed for a while, and then he got a new job but was let go within two weeks because the manager wanted to hire a buddy of hers instead (that REALLY sucked! I've never had such an anxiety attack before or since), then he had a temp job which ended after four months. It was two years of hell. Now he has some stability, and this job is something he really enjoys. He's had nothing but compliments for the bosses, but there's still an irrational zone in my brain that won't go away.

They have talked about the possibility of hiring a second person to work under him, because they are getting busy. Maybe it's that.

It makes perfect sense then why you are feeling this way. I'm so glad he has found good employment now. It's so hard in these times. Hang in there

[beachbirdie]

Thanks for the responses. Just hearing that word "catastrophising" actually helped, because it put things in perspective.

And yes, he has been through periods of unemployment over the past few years. He was laid off when the economy went south, and then was underemployed for a while, and then he got a new job but was let go within two weeks because the manager wanted to hire a buddy of hers instead (that REALLY sucked! I've never had such an anxiety attack before or since), then he had a temp job which ended after four months. It was two years of hell. Now he has some stability, and this job is something he really enjoys. He's had nothing but compliments for the bosses, but there's still an irrational zone in my brain that won't go away.

They have talked about the possibility of hiring a second person to work under him, because they are getting busy. Maybe it's that.

Yep, I agree. What you are feeling makes perfect sense. It is not irrational. The unsettled employment is actually quite a trauma to the psyche, and is one of the heavy hitters on the Open Original Shared Link.

We went through several years of employment ups and downs, dismissals, a year of unemployment, long stretches of finding temporary work through "head-hunters" (my husband is in high tech). You will probably feel insecure for some time to come, but hopefully it won't be quite as overwhelming now knowing you are NOT alone with it!