Which Is Less Rude When Going To A Wedding?

[cruelshoes]

We are going to my cousin

[Guest Doll]

I personally don't think you *can* be rude when you are dealing with an allergy or a health condition that requires a special diet. But maybe that's just me. As you know, I'm making all 150 of my wedding guests scarf down (likely semi-dry) gluten-free wedding cake! No exceptions...unless *they* want to bring their own food...hehe...

But I digress...

I think you should do whatever makes you feel the most comfortable. I would ask for the caterer's number and give it a shot. If it sounds like they can make you a gluten-free meal with such late notice and they seem familiar with allergies and/or the gluten-free diet, by all means go for it. You have nothing to lose by asking, and although the family may be busy, it's not hard to find out who's catering. You can even look up the number yourself. I personally do all the calling myself when I am going to a wedding, etc, as I know the bride/family will be busy.

If they aren't able to do it, or you don't feel you can trust them to make sure your meal is gluten-free, bring your own food and don't feel rude for even ONE second. Wrap it, and mark it "Special Food Allergy Meal-Don't Touch!", and put it on the table with pride!

I have to admit that I have felt a bit awkward when dealing with Celiac, like all of us. But this is a big celebration, and

a) Your needs as a guest should at least be *attempted* to be met. You are likely not the first nor only guest to RSVP late. Life happens.

and

The focus should be and will be on the couple, not on your gluten-free pasta salad or dinner roll!

Do whatever you feel is best, and please, NEVER feel rude about having to "treat" your medical condition or keep yourself healthy!!!!

P.S. I have found that some caterers actually prefer to be called a day or 2 before the actual wedding, since they don't need that much time to prepare a special meal and don't want to forget about it!

[Lisa]

At this late date, I would not involve the Caterer. The food count is established and most likely nothing will change by your attendence.

It is also a very busy time for the wedding party.

I would either eat before attending the wedding and dinner, or bring your own food for you and your family. You most likely would do that anyway when attending a large function.

I have approached the Caterer at a function and asked about certain foods, but never try to hold them up when they are doing a job. And I always find something to eat.

Just my thoughts as a recent Mother of the Bride.

Hope you enjoy your time.

[Mango04]

You could always contact the caterer to see if anything they're serving might happen to be safe. Sometimes it's just not hard for them to prepare your chicken without sauce at the last minute (for example). Bring your own food too (just small things) and eat before you go.

You don't have to involve the bride at all. You can usually just contact the reception location that's listed on the invitation.

Good luck

[Jestgar]

You could always contact the caterer to see if anything they're serving might happen to be safe.

I would do that.

And I would also assume that the bride and groom want me to have a good time, but they are way to stressed to help me do it.

Do what you think will work best for you and if the b or g ask you about it, smile and give them the above statement. If any one else asks, it isn't really their business and you can give answer that seems appropriate to you.

[VegasCeliacBuckeye]

Take it from a guy who has many years in the food service industry.

Get the name and number of the caterer from your cousin. Text her, email her or make a qwuick phone call. Brides are busy, but not so busy that they can't get you a name of a company or a phone number.

Call the caterer even if it is Friday. Its 2007 and if a caterer can't accomodate a food allergy with 24 hours notice, they shouldn't be in business. Its a guest service nrelated world out there and your needs are not that crazy. Its not rocket science to make you a grilled piece of chicken with steamed veggies and a baked potato.

Be kind but assertive about your Celiac. It may be late in the game, but no one wants you to get sick (hopefully and most importantly yourself).

BB