Gf Special Modifications

[tammy]

I knew that at some point my gluten-free special modifications would be thrown into my face by my Mother. At the beginning of the year my Mother informed me of her desire to throw a graduation party for my sibling but at a restaurant that he would enjoy and one that would accomodate me and my husband's ALLERGY. She found one!!!!!!! She made numerous communications with the appropriate people in the restaurant for our benefit. Now with the party a month away, I am informed how she made this effort for my benefit. But I sensed an underlining annoyance, which I anticipated. I was informed that I should bring my own sauces and dessert if I wanted one. Okay. But the tone and insistance of how I needed to know this was a realized fear. I did not put up a fuss about my bland but accommodated food choices and I simply asked about the dessert choice? I could bring my own goodie bag. My prediction came true.

I am not sure if and when to address this issue since I certainly do need special modifications when I eat at a relatives or dine out.

This is certainly one of those things that I feared would happen especially with my relatives and in-laws. I tried avoiding this like a plaque but it just can't be done given that fact that I do not cheat but my husband does so I look like a neurotic person, at least to his family.

The very last thing that I want is to have someone be in a position to go out of their way for me and yet it has been made quite clear that I need to speak out and tell people otherwise they will think badly of me, etc....

Can anyone relate? How does your gluten-free needs affect you and your family?

[tarnalberry]

I haven't had much of a problem with special accomodations with my family. We discuss restaurant options, and find a place that's likely to be friendly, then I do my best to find something I can have. If I can't, that's OK, and I make sure to tell people that, and so far no one has thought I was lying or trying to placate them, as far as I can tell. It's just not a big deal. Most of the time, with family, we end up cooking in anyway, and then it's simple to make most everything (but the bread in the breadbasket) gluten-free.

[cdford]

The only times I have had hospital level reactions were when a family member was paying and was determined to eat where they wanted. Both times it was a restaurant that I questioned but called ahead and was told they could feed me safely. My family members were here from out of town and I was not in a position to politely refuse. Next time I will eat before I go then just say I am not very hungry and drink a glass of tea or water while I enjoy their company. That last one was an almost $20,000 lunch by the time I got through with all the hospital and doctor bills.