Jump to content

  • Welcome to Celiac.com!

    You have found your celiac tribe! Join us and ask questions in our forum, share your story, and connect with others.



  • Celiac.com Sponsor (A1):

    Celiac.com Sponsor (A1-M):

  • Get Celiac.com Updates:
    Support Our Content
    eNewsletter
    Donate

Help! Terrible Twos Have Come...

TinkerbellSwt

Recommended Posts

TinkerbellSwt Collaborator
TinkerbellSwt
Posted

What do I do??? I wasnt prepared for this and when I signed on the dotted line, no one told me that they are sooo bad. All Colin does is whine all day and cry. I know he is teething still, but this isnt that.. I hate to say it, but it is grating on my nerves. There have been times I just want to run away. I cant stop him from whining.. I play with him, color with him, keep him busy, he just loses interest and starts whining. He just walks around.. whining and crying!!

Help moms out there.. should I just ignore the whining? I dont want him to think whining is the answer, but I feel bad leaving him alone with it. The crying too, when I know it isnt a distress cry, its trying to get my attention, then he gets it and he doesnt seem to want it.

I dont know, maybe today is just a bad day. We are saying goodbye to a family pet today. The Old Man has to be put to sleep. He is a ferret. He outlived his life expectancy.. he is completely bald now, they say its cancer. That is how most ferrets go.. they are my b/f's really, we really havent played with them since Colin came along. We still have Tsunami, but he is losing weight rapidly (he was always heavy). Tsunami is only 3 and has never lived without the Old Man, I dont know how he is going to take it. I feel bad for him too. I feel like he is going to be looking for the Old Man and be confused on where he is.

Sorry, two different things in the same thread..

Celiac.com Sponsor (A8):
Celiac.com Sponsor (A8):

Celiac.com Sponsor (A8-M):


CarlaB Enthusiast
CarlaB
Posted

Stephanie, be there for him when he needs you. You can't spoil a kid with too much love.

That being said, he can't whine to get what he wants. He needs to learn there are other ways, like talking. If he's upset, hold him. If he's mad, hold him. But don't just give him whatever he wants because he's crying about it, then you're just reinforcing the crying. Be sure he still gets naps, even if it's not daily. When my kids got particularly whiney, I put them to bed ...at least then they knew that if they whined, I thought they were telling me they're tired.

To this day, NOT ONE of them will tell me they're BORED! LOL If anyone's bored, I say, "Great, the kitchen was needing to be mopped, please get a bucket of water and mop it for me!" And I do follow through and make them mop!

Give them appropriate consequences to form their behavior. Crying = tired. Bored = chores.

At least two year olds are just whiney. Three year olds are two year olds with INTENT! :o Get prepared!! :lol:

And, I do think you are less able to handle it today with losing your pet. Sorry to hear about that. Colin will be upset about it, too, but won't be able to verbalize it.

TinkerbellSwt Collaborator
TinkerbellSwt
Posted
  • Author

Thanks Carla, I needed to hear words of reassurance. I know its tough for Colin not being able to talk yet, they wont give us speech therapy yet, he doesnt do enough imitation stuff for that. He has early intervention for OT, PT, and DT. just not speech yet, so he cant verbalize what he wants.. I will continue to try what I am doing. thanks

And thanks for the words about losing my pet.. its hard.. I never realized how much I care for the little buggers! He will be missed..... :(

Fiddle-Faddle Community Regular
Fiddle-Faddle
Posted

Great advice from Carla! That woman has EXPERIENCE (and wisdom)!!!

I just wanted to add that there are two things you may need to do, and they are totally at odds with each other.

1) You may need to scream your head off with frustration! Or at least, find an outlet or safe place to vent, let off steam, punch pillows, run up and down the stairs, etc...

2) You will have way better results with Colin if you are calm (which sounds impossible when you feel like punching something).

Since he is probably just as frustrated as you are, since he doesn't understand a whole lot, and is able to make himself understood even less, PREPARATION is a biggie. Tell him what to expect before it happens, and tell him over and over again. ("After breakfast, we are going to the grocery store, and after that we will play outside, and after that we will eat lunch, and after lunch we lie down,etc" If you are repeating a lot, you can even stop short of saying the last word, and see if he can fill it in.

If you are not home, and he is getting hungry, make sure you have packed some nibbles and a water bottle for him. 2-year-olds cannot deal well with hunger (it's a survival instinct), and that, along with being tired, is a huge Whine Causer, especially at a grocery store, where there are delicious foods and aromas everywhere.

Unfortunately, you can't bring instant naps with you, but you can pack distractions. My oldest son loved those books with the push-buttons that made noises, and my youngest loved wind-up music boxes (like the kind that are attached to over-the-crib-mobiles). As long as I kept winding it for her, she was happy. My middle one loved to count the most ridiculous things--like dumpsters we passed while driving. And they all loved sing-along- C D's, and were happy to sing those songs with me when we were stuck on line at the grocery, etc.

Not to imply that you would be doing this, but a huge percentage of the whiny kids I see are with moms who have cell-phones glued to one ear. Multi-tasking is a must for most moms, but cell-phone conversations do not go with parenting a 2-or-3-year-old; they just need too much one-on-one attention.

You can find a book to support pretty much any style of parenting. There are several I like by a husband-and-wife team named William and Martha Sears. He is a pediatrician, she is a nurse/lactation consultant, and they have 8 children. Their approach is very positive, very flexible (apparently their first 3 children were textbook-normal, and their 4th broke every rule in the parenting textbooks), and tends to center on understanding.

They have a really good website: www.askdrsears.com. I hope it helps!

CarlaB Enthusiast
CarlaB
Posted
Great advice from Carla! That woman has EXPERIENCE (and wisdom)!!!

1) You may need to scream your head off with frustration! Or at least, find an outlet or safe place to vent, let off steam, punch pillows, run up and down the stairs, etc...

Thank you.

I've always vacuumed ... with kids the house always needs it, and if you need to blow off steam, at least it's getting something done at the same time! LOL Plus, you can't effectively talk with anyone when the vacuum cleaner is running, so you get some time alone.

Good advice from Fiddle-Faddle, too.

TinkerbellSwt Collaborator
TinkerbellSwt
Posted
  • Author

Thanks to both of you.. I am not a parent with a cell phone in one ear.. I see those women and wonder how they do it?? Maybe I am just a bad mom?? The worst I do is come on here to read the boards when he is just whining.. after I have tried everything I can think of. Maybe I can find something, somewhere like you said Fiddle, a toy of his that will distract him too.

He also has a case of the blahs too. He is bored with all his toys, intervention comes and we are up and at em.. (two of them bring great big bags of toys, educational stuff) He also hasnt been to the sitter in over a week, where all the kids are his age and there is only about 4 of them and he loves the socializing and playing with all the different toys.. she is on vacation in Spain.. ahhh, she is back this week... how nice for us!

Thanks for all the kind words of encouragement. I just need to know sometimes that I am not a bad mom, this is just how a two year old reacts... I feel so bad sometimes...

Fiddle-Faddle Community Regular
Fiddle-Faddle
Posted
Good advice from Fiddle-Faddle, too.

Thanks! :)

I was also thinking--at age 2, he might need lots of outside, run-around, playground-type time (say, an hour every morning). THat can be a total sanity saver for you--he can blow off steam, and theyn he'll take a nice nap for you after lunch!

I was also thinking that just because they aren't giving him speech therapy doesn't mean you can't. You can learn a lot just by searching on the web. Youcan also do what a friend of mine did and if you ever need a babysitter, contact your local college and see if one of the special-ed majors or speech-therapy majors is interested in babysitting.

Celiac.com Sponsor (A8):
Celiac.com Sponsor (A8):

Celiac.com Sponsor (A8-M):


Fiddle-Faddle Community Regular
Fiddle-Faddle
Posted

YOU ARE NOT A BAD MOM!!!!!!!

girlfromclare Apprentice
girlfromclare
Posted

I know that this is meant to be the 'anything but celiac' space but just a thought, is he celiac or is that you or some other member of the family that is celiac since you are in this website? Cause my son is a celiac and his main symptom was constact whining... im talking all day every day about every little thing!!! You could barely say hello and he would start to cry. it was very frustrating and i often spent days crying myself until we realised the problem was celiac... if he is already on a gluten-free diet perhaps it is cross contamination? Sounds like any child who does that much crying is feeling frustrated for some reason that they cant explain i.e. pain... or discomfort. It drove my little boy mad from age 1 upwards... thank god he is a different child off the gluten but if he has even a tiny bit, the crying comes back!!! the terrible twos is one thing - but one can normally tell if it is a temper tantrum or just constant unexplainable crying...

good luck... oh and you arent a bad mom... i thought i was for three years until i found out, when my boy was four, that he was suffering all the time and it wasnt my parenting skills... or lack of...

liz

TinkerbellSwt Collaborator
TinkerbellSwt
Posted
  • Author

Colin is gluten free and has been since birth, by choice. We are having the genetic tests done in June, but even then he will live a gluten free existance, as gluten in any form is not allowed in my house. But thanks for the info. If he was getting CC, I would be sick too, we eat the same things and share most of our food...

girlfromclare Apprentice
girlfromclare
Posted
Colin is gluten free and has been since birth, by choice. We are having the genetic tests done in June, but even then he will live a gluten free existance, as gluten in any form is not allowed in my house. But thanks for the info. If he was getting CC, I would be sick too, we eat the same things and share most of our food...

oh well that explains that then! Well the terribe twos are fairly hard work at the best of times. i find with my daughter who is just going through them herself, that ignoring the crying and starting to look at something else or pointing out something to distract her is working quite well. i used to do all of those things with my son but they never worked as he would just keep crying anyway. Dairy is a huge mood swinger with my son too and we had to take him off it completely!

By the way a handy trick is to have things they like at hand - but good treats like raisins or strawberries or whatever you think is nice but without being goodies because then it becomes bribary and theyre so clever that they would start doing it just to get the goodies!! But some fruit or something like that, that they like is brilliant to lighten the mood...

TinkerbellSwt Collaborator
TinkerbellSwt
Posted
  • Author

Thats a good idea too. We just took Colin off of dairy a few weeks ago, due to constipation problems. And since soy milk, voila... problem solved.. that makes a difference too. Thanks for all ideas and suggestions.. I will just keep plowing away.. at least I know I am not alone in this!! Thanks everyone!

Archived

This topic is now archived and is closed to further replies.

Go to topic listing
  • Celiac.com Sponsor (A19):


  • Member Statistics

    • Total Members
      131,959
    • Most Online (within 30 mins)
      7,748
    jenny44
    Newest Member
    jenny44
    Joined
  • Celiac.com Sponsor (A20):

  • Forum Statistics

    • Total Topics
      121.5k
    • Total Posts
      1m
  • Celiac.com Sponsor (A22):



  • Celiac.com Sponsor (A21):


  • Upcoming Events

  • Posts

    • Scott Adams
      Does anyone here also have Afib

      By Scott Adams · Posted

      If black seed oil is working for his Afib, stick to it, but if not, I can say that ablation therapy is no big deal--my mother was out of the procedure in about 1 hour and went home that evening, and had zero negative effects from the treatment. PS - I would recommend that your husband get an Apple watch to monitor his Afib--there is an app and it will take readings 24/7 and give reports on how much of the time he's in it. Actual data like this should be what should guide his treatment.
    • Jacki Espo
      Covid caused reoccurrence of DH without eating gluten

      By Jacki Espo · Posted

      This happened to me as well. What’s weirder is that within a couple hours of taking paxlovid it subsided. I thought maybe I got glutened but after reading your post not so sure. 
    • Mari
      New Celiac Mama in My 30s

      By Mari · Posted

      Hi Tiffany. Thank you for writing your dituation and  circumstancesin such detail and so well writte, too. I particularly noticed what you wrote about brain for and feeling like your brain is swelling and I know from my own experiences that's how it feel and your brain really does swell and you get migraines.    Way back when I was in my 20s I read a book by 2 MD allergist and they described their patient who came in complaining that her brain, inside her cranium, was swelling  and it happened when she smelled a certain chemical she used in her home. She kept coming back and insisting her brain actually swelled in her head. The Drs couldn't explain this problem so they, with her permission, performed an operation where they made a small opening through her cranium, exposed her to the chemical then watched as she brain did swell into the opening. The DRs were amazed but then were able to advise her to avoid chemicals that made her brain swell. I remember that because I occasionally had brain fog then but it was not a serious problem. I also realized that I was becoming more sensitive to chemicals I used in my work in medical laboratories. By my mid forties the brain fog and chemicals forced me to leave my  profession and move to a rural area with little pollution. I did not have migraines. I was told a little later that I had a more porous blood brain barrier than other people. Chemicals in the air would go up into my sinused and leak through the blood brain barrier into my brain. We have 2 arteries  in our neck that carry blood with the nutrients and oxygen into the brain. To remove the fluids and used blood from the brain there are only capillaries and no large veins to carry it away so all those fluids ooze out much more slowly than they came in and since the small capillaries can't take care of extra fluid it results in swelling in the face, especially around the eyes. My blood flow into my brain is different from most other people as I have an arterial ischema, adefectiveartery on one side.   I have to go forward about 20 or more years when I learned that I had glaucoma, an eye problem that causes blindness and more years until I learned I had celiac disease.  The eye Dr described my glaucoma as a very slow loss of vision that I wouldn't  notice until had noticeable loss of sight.  I could have my eye pressure checked regularly or it would be best to have the cataracts removed from both eyes. I kept putting off the surgery then just overnight lost most of the vision in my left eye. I thought at the I had been exposed to some chemical and found out a little later the person who livedbehind me was using some chemicals to build kayaks in a shed behind my house. I did not realize the signifance  of this until I started having appointments with a Dr. in a new building. New buildings give me brain fog, loss of balance and other problems I know about this time I experienced visual disturbances very similar to those experienced by people with migraines. I looked further online and read that people with glaucoma can suffer rapid loss of sight if they have silent migraines (no headache). The remedy for migraines is to identify and avoid the triggers. I already know most of my triggers - aromatic chemicals, some cleaning materials, gasoline and exhaust and mold toxins. I am very careful about using cleaning agents using mostly borax and baking powder. Anything that has any fragrance or smell I avoid. There is one brand of dishwashing detergent that I can use and several brands of  scouring powder. I hope you find some of this helpful and useful. I have not seen any evidence that Celiac Disease is involved with migraines or glaucoma. Please come back if you have questions or if what I wrote doesn't make senseto you. We sometimes haveto learn by experience and finding out why we have some problems. Take care.       The report did not mention migraines. 
    • Mari
      My only proof

      By Mari · Posted

      Hi Jmartes71 That is so much like my story! You probably know where Laytonville is and that's where I was living just before my 60th birthday when the new Dr. suggested I could have Celiacs. I didn't go on a gluten challange diet before having the Celiac panel blood test drawn. The results came back as equivical as one antibody level was very high but another, tissue transaminasewas normal. Itdid show I was  allergic to cows milk and I think hot peppers. I immediately went gluten free but did not go in for an endoscopy. I found an online lab online that would do the test to show if I had a main celiac gene (enterolab.com). The report came back that I had inherited a main celiac gene, DQ8, from one parent and a D!6 from the other parent. That combination is knows to sym[tons of celiac worse than just inheriting one main celiac gene. With my version of celiac disease I was mostly constipated but after going gluten-free I would have diarrhea the few times I was glutened either by cross contamination or eating some food containing gluten. I have stayed gluten-free for almost 20 years now and knew within a few days that it was right for me although my recovery has been slow.   When I go to see a  medical provide and tell them I have celiacs they don't believe me. The same when I tell them that I carry a main celiac gene, the DQ8. It is only when I tell them that I get diarrhea after eating gluten that they realize that I might have celiac disease. Then they will order th Vitamin B12 and D3 that I need to monitor as my B12 levels can go down very fast if I'm not taking enough of it. Medical providers haven't been much help in my recovery. They are not well trained in this problem. I really hope this helps ypu. Take care.      
    • knitty kitty
      Does anyone here also have Afib

      By knitty kitty · Posted

      Fascinating.
×
×
  • Create New...

Important Information

NOTICE: This site places This site places cookies on your device (Cookie settings). on your device. Continued use is acceptance of our Terms of Use, and Privacy Policy.