Worried About Mom

[jasonD2]

My mom finally agreed to get the celiac test done 1 year ago and still hasnt done it but promises she will. shes struggling with weight issues and said she needs to drop some lbs before going to the doc but swears she will get the test. im just worried about her...she said she feels great but I feel like gluten might be contributing to her weight gain. she also recently developed oral lichen planus, which i think I have as well, but she has it worse than me. i dont know what else i can do to at this point...thankfully i got her on probiotics, fish oil and digestive enzymes so we're making progress. She was on Jenny Craig and lost 10 lbs but went off it after i sent her an article about the ingredients in the Jenny Craig meals. she works long days and isnt disciplined about food the way i am and doesnt have the energy to prepare and portion out all her meals. her mother & grandmother both died of colon cancer & i dont want her to suffer the same fate

[Black Sheep]

she works long days and isnt disciplined about food the way i am and doesnt have the energy to prepare and portion out all her meals.

This is probably why she's putting off getting the test done. Part of her probably just doesn't want to know, because then....everything changes. I can empathize with her because I was the same way, and my daughter, who admits she's almost positive she's gluten intolerant, is going through the putting-off-the-test thing, too. I never got the test because my doc suggested I just do the g.f. challenge--it's been 1 month exactly, and there's definite improvement. So this motivates me to stick with it. I want nothing to do with gluten now. My daughter is willing, but like your mom, she works a f.t. job and also has a very busy life outside of work. Plus, she can hardly cook! She can cook if she really wants to, but absolutely hates it! And so the thought of suddenly making such a huge, drastic change, and as if that weren't enough, suddenly having to plan every meal and cook most of them herself, is extremely daunting. I'm guessing this might be part of what your Mom's going through.

So in a way, you and I are in the same boat. Oh, and I'm pretty sure my son has a gluten problem as well, and trying to get him to try the challenge....but at least he has a wife who loves to cook and is fabulous at it!

So....what to do about Mom and daughter? Well, obviously we can't make them get off gluten but we can encourage them (which you've been doing). Do you think your mom might be a bit more open to simply going off gluten for a month and see how she feels? I know, there's still her problem of work, and fixing meals....are there stores in your area that carry a good selection of g.f. food? In my area there's only one store that carries only one g.f. bread, and it's NASTY. So I make my own bread, but a lot of people here have mentioned several different brands of really good g.f. bread and other more or less ready-to-eat g.f. products, so if the stores in your area carry this stuff, she may be more willing. My daughter works in a fairly large city, which has a Trader Joe's, so I'm trying to encourage her to stop in there on her way home from work some time and see what they have. Her main problem with this is not being able to afford a ton of specialty food, as she doesn't exactly make the big bucks! So in desperation, I've offered to do some g.f. baking for her, if she can't find/can't afford many of the g.f. products. Hey, here's an idea I should do with my daughter when I see her this weekend--Is there any way you can help your mom put together some type of menu, or even start with a list of g.f. foods that she likes, and are easy to cook? The beauty of this is, so many are naturally g.f., like fruits and veggies, meat, most dairy (if this isn't a problem for her), rice, lentils, quinoa.....I don't know....maybe once she started thinking of all the stuff she likes that is g.f., it won't all seem so scary to her. And believe me, this is a scary thing for many of us, at first anyway.

One thing that helped me was cruising g.f. recipe blogs. It was so encouraging to read the accounts of people who were diagnosed celiac (except for one of my favorites, she just did the challenge diet), thought their world had come to an end, then picked themselves up, dusted themselves off, and started cooking. And they have some awesome recipes, and even for someone who doesn't like to cook, or doesn't have much time, these can be really helpful. Because so many of the recipes are quick and easy, and because it's so encouraging to see that these regular people, not professional chefs (although another one of my faves ended up marrying a chef!), managed to carve out healthy, fun, g.f. lifestyles.

I don't know if any of this will help, but....if not, at least you know you're not alone in worrying about and trying to help a family member face up to the sad gluten facts and make changes!