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Anger


swittenauer

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eleep Enthusiast

I recommend looking into some of the relationship-counseling material on fuser/isolator pursuer/distance relationships -- Harville Hendrix has some good books on this.


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  • Replies 85
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swittenauer Enthusiast

That was a one time thing so I was just wondering how to just walk away. Everyone says to just walk away & give them time alone when they have gluten issues. We are very happy but just had a rare really bad night because I'm not good at going upstairs & giving him time. I'm kinda stubborn. Ha!

mmaccartney Explorer
Well, I really messed up this time. It seems as though I can give advice but not take my own. Maybe I just talk a good game. I don't know. Last night was bad! My husband was tired & had a massive headache & wasn't feeling good at all. He was angry & I don't blame him at all but when he told me he just needed me to go away. I didn't. Instead I wanted to know why he was saying the things that he was. I'm not good at walking away when I feel as though I did nothing wrong. How do I just leave without resolution of a problem or while feeling the need to justify or explain myself or explain to him why he shouldn't act the way he is. This is a major problem with us lately. Any suggestions for ways to change MY behavior. It is totally me this time I believe. I should give him what he needs & walk away but I can't when I feel so hurt.

Ummm.....and why can't he "go away"??? I did the same thing last night, but my wife left me alone. In hindsight, and after reading this I ask my self the same question, why didn't I tell that I needed to be alone and then leave the room myself?

it's a 2 way street!

swittenauer Enthusiast

Funny you should mention that because that is exactly what we talked about last night. He said he could easily walk away & go outside or upstairs or something for a few minutes or until he feels better. We agree that it is a 2 way street. I think it may just work out better for us since he is able to do that better than I am. Does this go back to the stubborn thing again with me? Ha! I think so.

  • 2 years later...
supernova777 Newbie

Ive just had the worst last couple of days and its all because i ate rice krispies.. which apparently has malt barley in it..

if i eat anything at all even close to being something i shouldnt i experience hell on earth for about 3-4 days..

ive been so angry i hit things i cant take this anymore i really cant

my ears go red, i get angry as hell, i feel it swelling up inside me, i start to hate people, and i bounce back in forth between that and feelin hopeless and depressed and feeling ill and

i havent been officially diagnosed but i desperately need to so that other people will believe me that i have something wrong with me and its not my fault i freak out when ive eaten things that i cant eat.....

supernova777 Newbie

on a daily basis i get the tingling in my legs almost everyday,

i get depressed at least once or twice a day..... it feels like..

i dont feel well

i feel like something is really wrong with me

i havent eaten bread in almost a year.

i quit smoking april 18 2007..

i still get itchy all over the place if i eat the wrong thing

i think im allergic to tim hortons coffee too

i hate having this problem its ruining my life

ive been charged with assault by freaking out on friends

that dont realize i have problems with foods

i didnt hurt anyone but i scare the poop out of people when i freak out

im really scared that noone is ever going to be able to help me

i think about killing myself when i feel the symptoms very badly

i dont really want to do it but the thought comes into my mind

i just hate feeling the symptoms i never want them to bother me again

i wish i didnt eat stupid ricekrispies how can something so stupid cause me

so much pain mental anguish and physical torture..

i get this crazy enrgy tis not normal i end up pushing up against walls

just to "use my muscles" and wanting to hit things and joint pain

and needing to stretch over and over and over and just this over all angst

the itchyness drives me crazy on my arms and legs

i wish there was something i could do to ensure this never bothers me again

my cheeks are itching like crazy as im writing this

i had rice krispies about 6 hours ago and ive eat en a whole box the last 3-4 days

asnd the last 3-4 days has been HELL

i cant tell u how annoyed and irritable i feel

and when i go to the bathroom it comes out in lil hard dark chunks like i was a rabit or

something, pebbles its like, it always is like that when im glutened

when id idnt kno wabout this i used to bleed going number 2 and freak out and not understand what the hell was happening

i used to eat this bread and years ago before i knew what celaic disease is

i noticed it had the ingredient monodiglycerides listed and anything with that on it would totally mess me up

to the point where id get this strange eye twitch and i wouldnt think or feel properly

my god it was so bad, and these were HEALTH products i was buying

there are so many people suffering frm this

having this and knowing about it

and knowing how little the medical community knows about this

is really scarey

it shows u that the so called human race is vERY FLAWED

and VERY UNEDUCATED

peeopel act smart and pretend to know alot but in reality they know DICK

except the specific broadest sterms discussed in their schooling most doctors dont Think they just perscribe.

i hate the medical profession... 99% of them anywya i know theres a small percentage of original and authentic thinking individuals but they are as far and few in between as they are in any faculty.

curlyfries Contributor

You said you haven't eaten bread in almost a year.......does that include all gluten?

You have found a good place to be. Everyone here is extremely helpful. Give us a little background info and feel free to ask questions.

Sounds like you would benefit from keeping a food/symptom diary. And put yourself on a very basic diet for now........meat, veggies, fruit.....nothing processed.

I'm sure others will have more helpful advice for you. Hang in there :)


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aikiducky Apprentice

I know that you're probably not feeling too well today so this can seem overwhelming. Try to stick to safe foods for now so that you can recover, ok?

YOU can help yourself. :) After a year practically gluten free (if I'm reading you right) it will be difficult to get a definitive diagnosis. But you don't need a diagnosis to go completely 100% gluten free. You just need to get very very careful about what you put in your mouth. Normally I always tell people to get all the possible tests done before going gluten free, so that they don't have to regret not doing them later. But in your case I'm worried that that would mean eating gluten again for a considerable time, and that that would just be too hard seeing what your reaction to it is like.

If in any doubt, don't eat it. You know that with your reaction you can't afford it.

A food/symptoms diary is a good idea, in case there are other trigger foods beside gluten. Dairy is one for me, for example. I'm completely dairy free, I even avoid cross contamination, because it makes me so moody.

Fresh veggies and fruit are always safe from a gluten point of view. So is plain meat . With everything that comes in a package, READ the package. Don't trust a gluten free label, read the actual ingredients. Don't think that if the name says "rice" ;) that it will be safe. You need to learn to always read all ingredients. I tend to stick to products with as few ingredients as possible, because it's simpler. :)

Your friends will notice if you get better and start to act better. That's a much more convincing proof than a piece of paper.

If you look at the parent site of this board, celiac.com, there are safe and unsafe ingredient lists.

I hope you feel better soon!

Pauliina

darlindeb25 Collaborator

I thought the same thing...if you have only given up bread, then you are not gluten free. We are all here to help and will answer questions for you, any time you need.

One of my sons also has extreme anger, and has even been court issued anger management classes. He has a heart of gold, yet can fly off the handle with very little aggravation. He is now very overweight @ 367#, has high BP, hypothyroid, carpal tunnel, sleep apnea, GERD, unstable liver numbers, and they have him on an axienty med. All symptoms of gluten intolerance, and his doctor has told him he can't be celiac because he is too heavy. Which absolutely is not true, overweight people can be extremely malnourished too and be gluten intolerant. He has state insurance, so he is sort of their mercy. Next visit, he is going to ask for gene testing, see if they will cover that.

Yes, I know he could test outside of insurance, he doesn't have the money, nor do I.

ang1e0251 Contributor
Ive just had the worst last couple of days and its all because i ate rice krispies.. which apparently has malt barley in it..

if i eat anything at all even close to being something i shouldnt i experience hell on earth for about 3-4 days..

ive been so angry i hit things i cant take this anymore i really cant

my ears go red, i get angry as hell, i feel it swelling up inside me, i start to hate people, and i bounce back in forth between that and feelin hopeless and depressed and feeling ill and

i havent been officially diagnosed but i desperately need to so that other people will believe me that i have something wrong with me and its not my fault i freak out when ive eaten things that i cant eat.....

Please know that you have come to the right place to ask for help. I couldn't be tested myself but had all the anger, fatigue and other problems you described. I went on a gluten-free elimination diet and it was magic! I had been praying for an answer to my physical problems. I think you know already you are celiac. Trust your inner voice and go ahead and make your life gluten free. You will see the relief and so will your friends. Find the answers from your food journal & read labels. Eat simply for awhile. Soon you will be healing from the inside.

ang1e0251 Contributor
Funny you should mention that because that is exactly what we talked about last night. He said he could easily walk away & go outside or upstairs or something for a few minutes or until he feels better. We agree that it is a 2 way street. I think it may just work out better for us since he is able to do that better than I am. Does this go back to the stubborn thing again with me? Ha! I think so.

I read some good hints some years ago that seem silly but really work. When you're ready with that smart remark (me) or unkind word; physically put your hand over your mouth & stop those words. A physical reminder can make you "snap out of it" and remember your resolve to back off for now.

A friend of ours hated to say no to invitations or requests but sometimes she couldn't accomodate everyone. She would say, "I really can't, I have to wash my hair that night." We all knew that to mean she didn't want to participate but didn't want to disappoint anyone. Also that she didn't need to explain every one of her private moments to her friends. So maybe when he needs some time alone, you can say, "I need to check the stove, iron, baby ..." or " I think I hear my mom calling me, the phone ringing....". You and he agree on an acceptable phrase, like a code word, then you both save face and diffuse a tense situation.

You'll get through this tough time & figure out what foods bothering him. Things will get better.

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