Chocolate Love & Hate

[Ennis-TX]

Thought I would bring up my most recent addiction. I always loved and had MAD cravings for chocolate. Not the sweet stuff, the powder is always what I craved, the darker the better. This was in part due to extreme anemia, and huge issues with getting enough iron due to internal bleeding issues with UC (I got cravings for dirt and chocolate but would just eat the cocoa).  But I used to have a love hate issues with it, if I ate too much like more then 2 tbsp in a sitting in anything I would get sick and I would do this often eating 1/4 in mixed recipes like a sauce, mixed with egg whites, almond butter, into quick cakes, or in icecream or shakes.. I still am unsure what this was, but the processed gluten-free labeled Hershey Special Dark was the main thing I consumed back then (around this time they did not have the plain Hershey or any other cocoa on the gluten-free list). This went on for a few years and then I moved on to RAW cocoa from Big Tree Farms and this lessened the nausea and sick feeling and enabled me to eat more but I still avoided it when I was not craving it due to it making me sick.  This year funny enough I got my anemia under control with upped vitamin C and finding out what triggered my bleeding flare ups was sugars from fruit, grain carbs, and starches, I found Crio Bru. Crio Bru is a coffee replacement, but it is actually just pure cocoa nibs/beans ground up like coffee ground, they come from different origin sourced beans with different roast levels, from a smokey dark french to lighter ones with smooth or floral notes. These, these I can sit down and grind up in almond milk or in shakes, sprinkle over deserts, mix in trail mixes, eat by the handful....and I  DO NOT GET SICK. I can eat over a cup of them and be very satisfied, they are very high in fiber and saturated healthy fats, antioxidants. and various other nutrients, and smash my binge eats faster then coconut or almonds. I only wish I had found them earlier, but this brought up some other thoughts.  Why does the processed cocoa bother me SO much more then these? Is it the alkalinity of them? The dry powder like state causing them to neutralize to much acid or absorb to much liquid? Or something added in the processing? Perhaps the processed cocoa just has a much much higher histamine level, I do not know but the fact these are so much better and finally my new best friend for putting on weight is amazing.

Anyone else have a chocolate issues, chocolate loves, or addictions? Or perhaps thoughts on these?