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That Didn't Last Long....

Guest ~jules~

By Guest ~jules~
in Coping with Celiac Disease

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Guest ~jules~
Guest ~jules~
Posted

Okay since I was diagnosed my husband has been really supportive. Lately I'm sensing he's getting a little burnt out on the cc issue, and I'm not very happy with him right now. Apparently he thinks he's just not going to be capable of remembering not to do certain things that will make me sick. So we just had a discussion on how he thinks I should do things so its easier for him. Nice.

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Posted

Ugh... My husband didn't understand the cc thing either so I ended up just making my whole house gluten free. Otherwise I would find crumbs everywhere. It wasn't until I made everything gluten free that I started really feeling great. Perhaps you could do the same? He may feel it's an inconvenience in the beginning, but it will be healthier for the whole family and most importantly YOU WON'T BE SICK!!! I'm sure he relies on you for many, many things. If you're sick, how will you perform these duties??? Just casually stop buying glutenous things and replace them with gluten free things. Likely he won't notice until he's practically gluten free already.

Guest ~jules~
Guest ~jules~
Posted
  Guhlia said:
Ugh... My husband didn't understand the cc thing either so I ended up just making my whole house gluten free. Otherwise I would find crumbs everywhere. It wasn't until I made everything gluten free that I started really feeling great. Perhaps you could do the same? He may feel it's an inconvenience in the beginning, but it will be healthier for the whole family and most importantly YOU WON'T BE SICK!!! I'm sure he relies on you for many, many things. If you're sick, how will you perform these duties??? Just casually stop buying glutenous things and replace them with gluten free things. Likely he won't notice until he's practically gluten free already.

I agree, I'm thinking about it really. He's already suggested it, so I think it would be okay. This is just not working. You know sometimes couples have enough issues at times and things to bicker about, I don't need to chomp at him everyday over this, I just need to solve the problem, go gluten free all the way...

CarlaB Enthusiast
CarlaB
Posted

It's much easier to be all gluten-free. The only gluten we have is the snacks the kids take to school with them ... the gluten-free ones are just too expensive to provide for a houseful of kids!

You need to get better at guilt ... I would have said, "Oh, yes, I'm very concerned that I'm doing everything I can to make my lifelong disease that I'm just now accepting, getting used to, and healing from less of an inconvenience to you. Please tell me how I can do that." Something like that makes the point well. Usually hubbies just aren't thinking when they say something like that and this kind of comment snaps them back to the reality that it's not always about them.

cgilsing Enthusiast
cgilsing
Posted

It took a while for my husband to get a grip on how little things would make me sick. This probably isn't the best advice, but it worked for me. I didn't dump it on him all at once. At first he seemed really frustrated by things. There was a lot of "You can't have THAT either!?! So I simplified our diets until he (and I)got used to the basics. Then little by little I dropped an "oh yeah, you can't let your hamburger bun touch my burger" or "we need a second toaster because I can't use yours" Now he is as careful as I am about food and reads lables like a champ :lol: Eventually he saw how much better I was (and how much better his life was for it) and that totally outweighed the inconvienence. :rolleyes:

Guest ~jules~
Guest ~jules~
Posted
  CarlaB said:
It's much easier to be all gluten-free. The only gluten we have is the snacks the kids take to school with them ... the gluten-free ones are just too expensive to provide for a houseful of kids!

You need to get better at guilt ... I would have said, "Oh, yes, I'm very concerned that I'm doing everything I can to make my lifelong disease that I'm just now accepting, getting used to, and healing from less of an inconvenience to you. Please tell me how I can do that." Something like that makes the point well. Usually hubbies just aren't thinking when they say something like that and this kind of comment snaps them back to the reality that it's not always about them.

Oh I gave it to him believe me, I just wanted to be polite on the board lol....I'm a bit of a spitfire...Really though its just so strange to me how some people are givers and some people are takers. I told him okay were going gluten free, lets do it once and for all. The silly man helped me cook dinner, then when it came time to fix the boys plates he says "oh let me grab the flour tortillas" ugh!!!!!!! We just discussed this, so I said no dear grab the corn, and throw the flour out, everyone is having the corn. LMAO!!!! I love him dearly, but sometimes I just stare at him blinking....wondering.... smiling......how many marbles might be left up there!!!! :blink: Its just a major adjustment for everyone at first, I don't think anyone is to blame....

Adelle Enthusiast
Adelle
Posted

Hey so first I wanna say *hugs* cause I know ur struggle. We're going gluten free cause I can't seem to get ryan (my hubby) to clean the counter! Oh well, I do the grocery shopping, he's going gluten free wether he knows it or not!

Second, are u going to the support group in salem? I just found out, it's every 3rd saturday (that's tomorrow) at 5125 skyline rd (skyline at keubler) room #3. I've never been, but I'm gonna go tmw to try it out. (I have a mohawk, if ur there u'll probably recognize me) :).

Hang in there.

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Guest ~jules~
Guest ~jules~
Posted
  Adelle said:
Hey so first I wanna say *hugs* cause I know ur struggle. We're going gluten free cause I can't seem to get ryan (my hubby) to clean the counter! Oh well, I do the grocery shopping, he's going gluten free wether he knows it or not!

Second, are u going to the support group in salem? I just found out, it's every 3rd saturday (that's tomorrow) at 5125 skyline rd (skyline at keubler) room #3. I've never been, but I'm gonna go tmw to try it out. (I have a mohawk, if ur there u'll probably recognize me) :).

Hang in there.

Theres a group, heck ya I want to go! To meet another living breathing celiac would be really nice, sometimes I feel like a freek in my own house! Is it in that Doctors Clinic on the corner? I can't go to the one tomorrow we have plans with friends I won't be able to get out of, but if you could let me know what building, or a phone number that would be wonderful! :D Thats a pretty good location also, I live out south. Thanks so much...Eh, well I never had the mohawk, but when I was 21 it was purple punky color....he he.... :P Maybe I'll see you at the next one, and thanks again...

Nooner Newbie
Nooner
Posted
  ~jules~ said:
:blink: Its just a major adjustment for everyone at first, I don't think anyone is to blame....

Isn't that the truth! We all make mistakes, and it takes a while to learn new habits.

Congrats on getting your house gluten free. That will really help. Your husband might need some extra assurance right now that this is hard now, but it will get easier and will all be worth it. Tell him often how much you appreciate his help and support. Positive reinforcement does wonders for all of us!

~Li

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