Jump to content
  • You are not alone. Join Celiac.com for trusted gluten-free answers and forum support.



  • Celiac.com Sponsor (A1):
    Celiac.com Sponsor (A1-M):

The Funny Pages - Tickle Me Elbow - The Original


TriticusToxicum

Recommended Posts

jerseyangel Proficient
Ohhhhh . . . a special club, huh :ph34r: ? Is there a secret handshake? a password? a knowing look? ;)

OK, anybody mind if I post about 350 of the exact same message so I can get into the club? :rolleyes:

Hey Janet--

A while back two members had a race to see who could hit the 500 first. Emily was one, I forget who the other person was....


Celiac.com Sponsor (A8):
Celiac.com Sponsor (A8):



Celiac.com Sponsor (A8-M):



  • Replies 51k
  • Created
  • Last Reply
CarlaB Enthusiast
Ohhhhh . . . a special club, huh :ph34r: ? Is there a secret handshake? a password? a knowing look? ;)

OK, anybody mind if I post about 350 of the exact same message so I can get into the club? :rolleyes:

We can't tell you any of the club secrets until you get there. Sorry.

Yeah, that was FUNNY when the two were racing to get to 500. A TON of nonsense posts and topics!!!

Darn210 Enthusiast

Who won?

(Look, another post under my belt. If I hadn't added this comment, it would have only been two words. Hehehe. I'll be in that speeeecial club in no time.)

tom Contributor
Who won?

(Look, another post under my belt. If I hadn't added this comment, it would have only been two words. Hehehe. I'll be in that speeeecial club in no time.)

Heehee Janet! ^_^ Just go to EVERY thread and add "hmmm interesting" to each one!! :lol:

elye Community Regular

I was in that grand Fortune 500 race...alongside Jerry and....forget her real name, but her posting name is "confused". Jerry won, but it was VERY close and the tension was electric. His clever strategy was to simply count the post number on each posting, and nothing else. "478"...then "479"...Kinda cheating :P:angry: , if you ask moi. Actually, thank gawd there isn't a governing body that regulates "real" posts, and deletes those that don't meet up to content standard. Don't think I'd be past twenty or so!

And Janet, at 500 posts you get to write under your avatar. However, the excitement REALLY begins at 1,000, where I've been promised I get a new house.

Jestgar Rising Star
I was in that grand Fortune 500 race...alongside Jerry and....forget her real name, but her posting name is "confused". Jerry won, but it was VERY close and the tension was electric. His clever strategy was to simply count the post number on each posting, and nothing else. "478"...then "479"...Kinda cheating :P:angry: , if you ask moi. Actually, thank gawd there isn't a governing body that regulates "real" posts, and deletes those that don't meet up to content standard. Don't think I'd be past twenty or so!

And Janet, at 500 posts you get to write under your avatar. However, the excitement REALLY begins at 1,000, where I've been promised I get a new house.

Hayy!! Who's giving you the house? And is it real? or only virtually real? And do you get to pick the color?

CarlaB Enthusiast
Hayy!! Who's giving you the house? And is it real? or only virtually real? And do you get to pick the color?

She's delusional ... just tell her "That's nice" and she'll be fine.


Celiac.com Sponsor (A8):
Celiac.com Sponsor (A8):



Celiac.com Sponsor (A8-M):



Darn210 Enthusiast
She's delusional ... just tell her "That's nice" and she'll be fine.

That's nice . . . 167. :P

Jestgar Rising Star
That's nice . . . 167. :P

:lol: :lol: :lol:

Jestgar Rising Star

Maybe it's just a Canadian house. I don't want one of those

elye Community Regular
Maybe it's just a Canadian house. I don't want one of those

What, an igloo?

(BTW, been 26 degrees C here for most of September...that's 80 F). In fact, you'd LOVE a Canadian house. But it won't be such a great deal anymore, as our loonie hit PARITY with the US dollar for a brief, fleeting moment today! :o:) So I think that when our dollar goes above the greenback, we Canadian posters should get double the credit for each time we post. Two for one...Man, I'd be at 1300!

Mtndog Collaborator

This thread is getting as hard to keep up wit as OMG. We Lymie brains can be slow you know and we sleep a lot so y'all have to slow down!

OK- good old Uncle ray is at it again!:

The Purina Diet

I have 2 dogs & I was buying a large bag of Purina at Wal-Mart and standing in line at the check out. A woman behind me asked if I had a dog.

On impulse, I told her that no, I was starting The Purina Diet again, although I probably shouldn't because I'd ended up in the hospital last time, but that I'd lost 50 pounds before I awakened in an intensive care ward with tubes coming out of most of my orifices and IV's in both arms.

I told her that it was essentially a perfect diet and that the way that it works is to load your pants pockets with Purina nuggets and simply eat one or two every time you feel hungry & that the food is nutritionally complete so I was going to try it again.

I have to mention here that practically everyone in the line was by now enthralled with my story, particularly a guy who was behind her.

Horrified, she asked if I'd had ended up in the hospital in that condition because I had been poisoned. I told her no; it was because I'd been sitting in the street licking my balls and a car hit me. I thought one guy was going to have a heart attack he was laughing so Hard as he staggered out the door.

Stupid idiot! Why else would I buy dog food?

and.....

Why Men Don't Write Advice Columns

Dear Walter:

I hope you can help me here. The other day I set off for work leaving my husband in the house watching the TV as usual. I hadn't gone more than a few hundred yards down the road when my engine conked out and the car shuddered to a halt. I walked back home to get my husband's

help.

When I got home I couldn't believe my eyes. He was parading in front of the wardrobe mirror dressed in my underwear and high-heel shoes, and he was wearing my make up.

I am 32, my husband is 34 and we have been married for twelve years. When I confronted him, he tried to make out that he had dressed in my lingerie because he couldn't find his own underwear. But when I asked him about the make up, he broke down and admitted that he'd been wearing my clothes for six months. I told him to stop or I would leave him.

He was let go from his job six months ago and he says he has been feeling increasingly depressed and worthless. I love him very much, but ever since I gave him the ultimatum he has become increasingly distant.

I don't feel I can get through to him anymore. Can you please help?

Sincerely,

Mrs. Sheila Lusk

--------------------------------------------------------

Dear Sheila:

A car stalling after being driven a short distance can be caused by a variety of faults with the engine. Start by checking that there is no debris in the fuel line. If it is clear, check the jubilee clips holding the vacuum pipes onto the inlet manifold. If none of these approaches solves the problem, it could be that the fuel pump itself is faulty, causing low delivery pressure to the carburetor float chamber.

I hope this helps.

Walter

blueeyedmanda Community Regular

Man I remember when I hit 500 and got to join the club. I love putting text under my pictures. It helps people to know what my pictures mean.

elye Community Regular
:lol::lol::lol::lol::lol: Excellent, Bev...!
Darn210 Enthusiast

gigglegiggle carburator float chamber gigglegiggle

:lol::lol::lol:

CarlaB Enthusiast
This thread is getting as hard to keep up wit as OMG. We Lymie brains can be slow you know and we sleep a lot so y'all have to slow down!

Speak for yourself ... I have to take pills to sleep!!!

Funny jokes. :lol:

Darn210 Enthusiast
Tomorrow, 'twill be fixed at 1:00. one HOPES, anyway. :huh:

Oh, SuuuuuuuZeeeee . . .

Times up. What color and geometrical shape is your hair, now?

tom Contributor

LOL Bev!! :lol::lol:

Wish we all had an Uncle Ray. :)

Ok, Carla here's your cue. NitWit Spice keeps whispering in my ear that the caption-adding isn't until after post #501.

Janet? Is there a pool? ^_^ I'll take rhombus. :blink::rolleyes:

elye Community Regular

...Trapezoid. Large and puce-coloured.

C'mon, Susie...where are you?

blueeyedmanda Community Regular
...Trapezoid. Large and puce-coloured.

C'mon, Susie...where are you?

or a Rhombus!!! maybe puke-green colored.

CarlaB Enthusiast
Ok, Carla here's your cue. NitWit Spice keeps whispering in my ear that the caption-adding isn't until after post #501.

Whatever ... B) It's too late for us to go back and check. :)

Bev, just read your jokes to hubby ... he thought they were hysterical.

Mtndog Collaborator
Whatever ... B) It's too late for us to go back and check. :)

Bev, just read your jokes to hubby ... he thought they were hysterical.

Yep- Uncle ray is QUITE a piece of work. He's my godafther as well (WHAT was my mom thinking? :lol: :lol: :lol: :lol: ) and I'm sure he's where I got my somewhat bawdy, tassle twirling sense of humor.

Siouxie- I hope your hair is OK!

nikki-uk Enthusiast
(BTW, been 26 degrees C here for most of September...that's 80 F).

Dear god!! I'll take the Canadian house with temperatures that good (measly 17 degrees c here!!)

Mounties, Lumberjacks an' all ;)

and I'm sure he's where I got my somewhat bawdy, tassle twirling sense of humor

Bev, - it's not somewhat :lol:

Oh and luv uncle Ray (as always ;) )

nikki-uk Enthusiast
Cubie--is what I call the girl I share my cubicle wall with at work. It is this wall that moves since it is not a sturdy permanent fixture. I call her my cubie mate. Makes it sound nicer than it is....a droopy office cubiucle. :)

:lol::lol: OK!

I thought maybe it was someone from Cuba !! :lol::lol:

Jestgar Rising Star
gigglegiggle carburator float chamber gigglegiggle

:lol::lol::lol:

:lol: :lol: :lol:

Archived

This topic is now archived and is closed to further replies.

  • Celiac.com Sponsor (A19):
  • Member Statistics

    • Total Members
      134,199
    • Most Online (within 30 mins)
      10,442

    Tricia01
    Newest Member
    Tricia01
    Joined
  • Celiac.com Sponsor (A20):
  • Celiac.com Sponsor (A22):
  • Forum Statistics

    • Total Topics
      121.7k
    • Total Posts
      1m
  • Celiac.com Sponsor (A21):
  • Upcoming Events

  • Posts

    • cristiana
      I just thought I'd update this post. My father has had some issues with his heart rythym and we found giving him an electrolyte drink plus a vitamin D supplement with extra calcium containing food (yoghurt) made a big difference, and very quickly. My own problems with ectopic heartbeats started up again with warmer weather so I thought I'd take a leaf out of his book, and now, for the second time, after just one Phizz Electrolyte Drink, and a dose of vitamin D (Fultium D 800 x 4) with a milkshake, my ectopics disappeared within the hour.   Probably the Phizz drink rather than the D with calcium, but maybe it all helped?  Just mentioning this in case anyone is looking for answers.
    • Russ H
      Do you have the standard range for the test results you received? A level of anti-tTG2 antibodies at least 10x the standard range is almost certainly (>98%) due to coeliac disease. Moderately raised levels can be caused by other conditions as well as coeliac disease. Accuracy of the No-Biopsy Approach for the Diagnosis of Celiac Disease in Adults: A Systematic Review and Meta-Analysis It is possible to have latent or early stage coeliac disease without histological changes visible by microscope. As has been suggest in this thread, if the repeat test comes up negative and serology is high, request an HLA genetic test from your specialist. Only 40 % of the population carries an HLA gene variant enabling the development of coeliac disease - if you test negative for this, it is quite unlikely that you have coeliac disease.  
    • Wheatwacked
      Hi @Ginger38, By now you know that these things improve without gluten. I once saw an interview with a corporation executive where he proudly declared that his wheat products are more addictive than potato chips. Dr Fuhrman (Eat to Live) said find foods that are friendly to you to be friends with.  
    • cristiana
      Hi @CC90 Ah... that is very interesting.  Although it is very annoying for you to have to go through it all again, I would say that almost sounds like an admission that they didn't look far enough last time?   I could be wrong, but I would not be at all surprised if they find something on the next attempt.  Coeliac damage can be very patchy, as I understand it, so that's why my own gastroenterologist always likes to point out that he's taken lots of samples!  In the kindest possible way (you don't want to upset the person doing the procedure!) I'd be inclined to tell them what happened last time and to ask them in person to take samples lower down, as  if your health system is anything like the one in my country, communication between GPs, consultants and hospitals isn't always very good.  You don't want the same mistake to be made again. You say that your first endoscopy was traumatic?  May I ask, looking at your spelling of coeliac, was this done at an NHS hospital in England?  The reason for the question is that one of my NHS diagnosed friends was not automatically offered a sedative and managed without one.  Inspired by her, I tried to have an endoscopy one time, in a private setting, without one, so that I could recover quicker, but I had to request sedative in the end it was so uncomfortable.    I am sorry that you will have to go through a gluten challenge again but to make things easier, ensure you eat things containing gluten that you will miss should you have to go gluten free one day. 😂 I was told to eat 2 slices of normal wholemeal bread or the equivalent every day in the weeks before , but I also opted for Weetabix and dozens of Penguin chocolate biscuits.  (I had a very tight headache across my temple for days before the procedure, which I thought was interesting as I had that frequently growing up. - must have been a coeliac symptom!)  Anyway, I do hope you soon get the answers you are looking for and do keep us posted. Cristiana  
    • CC90
      Hi Cristiana   Yes I've had the biopsy results showing normal villi and intestinal mucosa.  The repeat endoscopy (requested by the gastro doc) would be to take samples from further into the intestine than the previous endoscopy reached.      
×
×
  • Create New...