Bah Humbug

[Jestgar]

I am looking forward to Christmas. I'll be going to my Mom's house armed with as many gluten-free df goodies as I can come up with!! I love a challenge, and this new way of cooking certainly qualifies.

[wonkabar]

I can't bah-humbug because I absolutely, positively love Christmas. BUT, I refuse to over-induldge my kids (they're 3 1/2 and nearly 2). Last year they got such a ridiculous amount of stuff/toys that I wound up returning most of what Santa left at our house from us b/c there was no way that two kids could play with or *needed* that much stuff. This year, the only people that we're letting buy the kids a toy is my in-laws and my brother and sister in-law. We'll be doing Christmas with them so I told them they could buy something for them if they wanted them to be able to open up something other than clothes.

I created a Borders wish list for both of the kids and put lots of books on them. I emailed it to friends and family and included sizes for clothes. I explained that clothes or books would be put to better use and most appreciated. I honestly didn't care if anyone was offended by our "no toys" policy this year...BTW, no one was and they all agreed that the "stuff" gets way too out of hand. Not to mention that my daugther's birthday is December 26! If I'm gonna over-indulge my kids I'd rather do it with books than crap that they play with for a day and then sits on a shelf for 6 months. Even though we're young (mid-30's) we're both very oldfashioned in that we don't ever want our kids to expect that they will be given things hand over fist simply because they want it. We just don't believe in that. Don't get me wrong, we're very good to our kids and they are very well taken care of, but we have no tolerance for self-entitlement.

After Christmas last year, I donated 4 lawn and leaf bags full of toys and stuff to an organization run by a local church for young, single mothers. I was mortified to see that I was able to bag that much stuff and my kids still had plenty to play with. I truly was bothered by this. Our policy now is also that when something new comes in something "old" goes out and is donated. No child needs that many toys. As mortified as I was, it felt so good to know that I was able to help other children who were not as fortunate as my own. Perspective is a beautiful thing and too many kids are brought up without it.

My brothers and sisters in-law and I have eliminated Christmas and birthday gifts and now only buy for the kids. The six of us decided to go out to dinner in December, without the kids, to celebrate Christmas. We've had a blast doing it! Everybody gets phone calls and cards for birthdays which is enough as adults! One of my brothers has a huge Christmas party and every year they get tons of hostess gifts from their guest...nice bottles of wine/vodka, something for the house, etc. My sister in-law always appreciated the thought but wished people just came for the party without bringing things for them...they're in a very "comfortable" financial situation. This year, they included a note with the invitations saying that our presence was gift enough however, if someone was compelled to bring something they'd like it to be a gift for a child 0-15 years-old to be donated to Toys for Tots. I thought this was such a wonderful idea, and I know my sister in-law is so much more comfortable with this idea.

[Jestgar]

If I'm gonna over-indulge my kids I'd rather do it with books than crap....

YEA!!!!!!!

[wonkabar]

YEA!!!!!!!

Thanks!

(Stepping onto my soapbox for a moment... )When I was still teaching, the K-4 school I worked at started a holiday toy drive for Toys for Tots. I thought it was a wonderful idea until I found out that there was also a contest to win a Beanie Baby. In order to increase the donations, the child's name would be entered to win a "hot" Beanie Baby if they brought in a toy. I couldn't believe they were doing this My arguement to this was.... how about we teach our kids to be generous and help those less fortunate because it's the right thing to do rather than have an alterior motive. The incentive took away from the whole idea of helping others. I was so aggravated by this. (I'm stepping off of my soapbox now! )

[debmidge]

I don't mind Christmas starting in November....I am always behind when it comes to holidays and it serves as a good reminder that Christmas is coming, otherwise I'd start my shopping and Christmas cards too late. I am the person who puts the all Christmas music station on in car on 11/22.

This being said, our extreme consumerism isn't healthy. Buy the stuff if you really need and have use for it, but not as a status symbol. This year my gift theme for the nieces & Nephews is "pajamas". Everyone is getting new winter pajamas. Last year was toys -- I am sure those toys are still in good shape so there's no need for new toys. Plus their parents do the toys on Christmas. Last year I purchased lingerie slips for the girls (ages 5 and 6) as this is an item that seems to be gone. For some oddball reason women aren't wearing slips anymore? Well I wanted my nieces to see the practicality and modesty of wearing a slip under a dress or skirt. One of my nieces complains about the interior seams of her dresses and the slip solved the problem for her.

I find that bringing the season on earlier leads to me more time for introspection of life, God, good-will-towards men stuff, I take from the pushing of the season what I want to take from it. I start looking for the Salvation Army people with their kettles and have my dollar bills ready.

Part of the introspection I find is that it helps me to realize that life is good, albeit not perfect and it acts as a calming force.

Remember: Love people, use things.