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How Do I Politely Tell My Grandma That She's Been Making Me Goodies W/ Gluten?

Sweetfudge

By Sweetfudge
in Coping with Celiac Disease

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Sweetfudge Community Regular
Sweetfudge
Posted

I haven't eaten any of the things shes made, but I haven't had the heart to tell her I can't enjoy them. I've shared them w/ my husband and his family, who have said they're great. But I may have to deal w/ confronting the situation at a big dinner...and I don't want her to feel bad. I was thinking about giving her a travel card that I made up, and highlighting all the different forms of gluten. Good idea? Any others? Thx! Happy new year to you all!!!

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Ursa Major Collaborator
Ursa Major
Posted

Giving her the travel card is is good idea, but not on its own. You really, seriously, need to sit down with her, and have a private talk about gluten. Let her know you really appreciate her efforts, and that you haven't told her about her gluten mistakes because you didn't want to hurt her feelings. And while the goodies were delicious, only your family could eat them.

Make sure you tell her all that very lovingly. And then explain to her exactly what gluten is, and what are good substitutes she can use to bake for you. Maybe even give her a gluten-free cookbook. If she asks you why you haven't told her before, tell her how much you love her, and that you didn't want to upset her. And the longer you kept quiet, the harder is became to tell her.

Something like that. Make sure you have all the information written down for her, too, so she will be able to look up what to use and what not to use.

Guest cassidy
Guest cassidy
Posted

Maybe I am extra paranoid but I would be afraid to let other people bake for me gluten-free. I guess it depends on the person but I can't see people who don't deal with this daily considering cc. I know that when I used to bake I would use the same measuring spoon/cup for flour, sugar, whatever needed the same amount without washing it with soap in between. I consider all my old baking supplies contaminated because I don't know what I touched or got flour into. I can't see other people realizing that double dipping one time is enough to get us sick. Also, baked goods are quite sticky and I would be concerned about using the same pans. Maybe your grandma is different than mine but mine doesn't see that well and therefore her dishes are never washed that well. Her pans are very old and scratched and I would think the combination of those two would mean some hidden gluten in her baking things.

That being said, what does your grandma know about your celiac now? Giving her a basic overview of the situation and what happens to you when you eat gluten is probably a good place to start if she doesn't know all that yet. The other question is, what do you want the outcome to be? Do you want her to be able to cook and bake for you? Do you just want her to stop making things you can't eat?

I don't know how sensitive you are but I always bring my own food to family dinners. Everyone understands that I just don't want to get sick and no one is offended by it. I still help set the table and do my fair share for the dinner even if I'm not eating their food. Once everyone sits down then I microwave whatever I brought. I feel much more comfortable this way because I am very sensitve and I don't want to feel pressured to eat food I'm uncomfortable with.

mtdawber Apprentice
mtdawber
Posted
Giving her the travel card is is good idea, but not on its own. You really, seriously, need to sit down with her, and have a private talk about gluten. Let her know you really appreciate her efforts, and that you haven't told her about her gluten mistakes because you didn't want to hurt her feelings. And while the goodies were delicious, only your family could eat them.

Make sure you tell her all that very lovingly. And then explain to her exactly what gluten is, and what are good substitutes she can use to bake for you. Maybe even give her a gluten-free cookbook. If she asks you why you haven't told her before, tell her how much you love her, and that you didn't want to upset her. And the longer you kept quiet, the harder is became to tell her.

Something like that. Make sure you have all the information written down for her, too, so she will be able to look up what to use and what not to use.

My mom does the same thing. She means well and I am trying to educate her. Stupid question. What is the travel card and where can I find it?

Viola 1 Rookie
Viola 1
Posted
My mom does the same thing. She means well and I am trying to educate her. Stupid question. What is the travel card and where can I find it?

The Canadian Celiac Ass. has an excellent one. I have mine laminated so it doesn't get spots when it goes back to the kitchen in a restaurant. It also fits nicely in my pocket or purse.

You can also print some off of some web sites. Actually I think there are several including the Kinnikinnick site. At least they used to have one <_<

CarlaB Enthusiast
CarlaB
Posted

After you politely tell her, why not give her a few gluten-free recipes so that she doesn't have to go looking for them? Last time I went to visit my grandmother she made peanut butter cookies (the three ingredient ones), chocolate cookies (from a recipe that I had found on the internet but never tried) and meringue cookies. They were all delicious!!

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