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Letting It Go...


Tim-n-VA

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Tim-n-VA Contributor

I was at a family reunion yesterday. One of my brothers is almost 60 and has had digestive issues - IBS - as long as I can remember. I told him that since I was diagnosed that his odds of having celiac had changed from the 1 in 133 that seems accepted to closer to 1 in 20. I asked if he'd even talked to his doctor about it and was told no. His logic is that the combination of medicines they have him on are controlling his symptoms.

I don't believe in looking for trouble and I'm not one of those people who see celiac in everything (kid with a hammer, everything's a nail, etc.) And, despite the many "ignorant doctor" threads on this board, I wouldn't have been bothered as much if his doctor had a reason not to test. It just floors me that someone would go to a doctor for something has symptoms that overlap celiac, knows there is a genetic part and not even tell his doctor that there is a family history.

On our mother's side of the family, auto-immune diseases are rampant ranging from diabetes to thyroid disease to at least one with Lupus.

At some point you just have to let go and let others deal with the consequences of their choices. That's what I'm trying to do but it isn't easy.

That's my Monday morning vent, thanks for listening.


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HAK1031 Enthusiast

people see gluten-free eating as a death sentence. stupid, right? they'd rather risk their lives and be in denial and be miserable than stop eating bread. yes, it's a pain sometimes, but it's beyond worth it. unfortunately, some people refuse to see that. if you told them, "you probably have celiac, you should get tested. all you have to do is take drug X" then most people would be a lot less reluctant. unfortunately, people are wayyy too attached to their wheat-based foods! it seems stupid to us, but there's not much we can do for the stubborn ones.

Calicoe Rookie
I was at a family reunion yesterday. One of my brothers is almost 60 and has had digestive issues - IBS - as long as I can remember. I told him that since I was diagnosed that his odds of having celiac had changed from the 1 in 133 that seems accepted to closer to 1 in 20. I asked if he'd even talked to his doctor about it and was told no. His logic is that the combination of medicines they have him on are controlling his symptoms.

I don't believe in looking for trouble and I'm not one of those people who see celiac in everything (kid with a hammer, everything's a nail, etc.) And, despite the many "ignorant doctor" threads on this board, I wouldn't have been bothered as much if his doctor had a reason not to test. It just floors me that someone would go to a doctor for something has symptoms that overlap celiac, knows there is a genetic part and not even tell his doctor that there is a family history.

On our mother's side of the family, auto-immune diseases are rampant ranging from diabetes to thyroid disease to at least one with Lupus.

At some point you just have to let go and let others deal with the consequences of their choices. That's what I'm trying to do but it isn't easy.

That's my Monday morning vent, thanks for listening.

Yes, I definitely know what you mean, Tim. It is hard to watch people be so sick, and not ask the right questions or even want to act on information that you gingerly lay out in front of them. But, it all comes down to what HAK was saying - people don't want to know because they don't want to change. With some of the men I've met, including my brother, it comes down to beer. And, in a sense, I can't completely blame them because it is overwhelming to think about at first. They may not be at the point yet where they realize that it isn't just giving up beer, but their health, longevity, freedom from debilitating diseases and quality of life.

missy'smom Collaborator

I won't go into all the problems that my mother has but she's been in a nursing home and other care facilities for decades and is only 68. I've talked to her Dr. and told him that my sister and I both have celiac disease and mentioned the symptoms that we share with our mother. Last time I talked to him he said(to humor me) that he would "keep it in mind"(the gluten-free diet) next time her diareah was uncontollable ( she's had part of her intestinal tract removed already and from what I understand is on meds. constantly to keep her D under control). He said he "didn't want to do that to her"(put her on a gluten-free diet). :angry: I have my own battles and challenges and a child with challenges as well, it was an agonizing decision and hard to do but I've decided to let it go for the most part(I live out of state). It hurts to see those we love suffer, whether it be a result of their own choices or at the hands of others.

jerseyangel Proficient

Tim--

I just wanted to tell you that I completely understand and can relate to what you are saying.

I've gone into my sister's story several times here on the board--suffice it to say that I've seen, first-hand, doctors ignoring--completely ignoring--classic symptoms and family history. I had to finally stop hitting my head against a brick wall.

I don't know what else to say, it's the worst kind of frustration when it's a family member and you feel absolutely helpless.

Glad you could come here and vent :)

babysteps Contributor
I told him that since I was diagnosed that his odds of having celiac had changed from the 1 in 133 that seems accepted to closer to 1 in 20. I asked if he'd even talked to his doctor about it and was told no. His logic is that the combination of medicines they have him on are controlling his symptoms.

At some point you just have to let go and let others deal with the consequences of their choices. That's what I'm trying to do but it isn't easy.

That's my Monday morning vent, thanks for listening.

ur welcome :)

I think you deserve a lot of credit - sounds like you gave your brother enough information for him to make his own decision. And that isn't the decision you or I may have made, but it's his, it's informed, and he's happy with his course of care.

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