Cannot Control My Cheating...please Help.

[WW340]

I have never been tempted to cheat. I get too sick from even a little cross contamination. I do miss gluten foods, but I made it my mission to learn to make every single thing that my heart desires in a gluten free form.

I keep substitutes for all temptations in my pantry. I use foodtek instant chocolate cake and brownies for real urgent emergencies.

I make a killer pizza now and really very good bread, buns etc. I make extras and keep them frozen. Just this weekend, my husband bought cinnamon rolls that smelled so devine, I thought I would go crazy. So today, I made myself cinnamon rolls. Were they as good as his, probably not, but they did satisfy the craving.

I have an added incentive. I watched my mother die of intestinal lymphoma when she was just 2 years older than I am now. I don't want to go like that, and I don't want my family to watch me die that way.

I am sorry you are having these problems. I can still sympathize with your situation. If you feel you need counseling, by all means, go for it. Do whatever you have to do to stay healthy. This disease will rob your health very slowly and insidiously. I have less than 60% of my bone mass left. I have already broken several bones. My teeth are cracking at an alarming rate, and I now need 2 dental implants, which I cannot do while I am on bone medicine. I had miscarriages and was only ever able to carry one child to term.

Get control of this now, while you are young and healthy. I was never diagnosed until I was very ill. I feel fortunate to have big reactions to keep me on the straight and narrow. I truly hope you can find a way to deal with this and live a long healthy life. Good luck. Hopefully, some of the medicines currently in trial will be available in the near future to help folks like you who are struggling with the diet.

[Chrissyb]

I hope this doesn't come across wrong. In reading the above posts I found myself feeling condemend for sometimes feeling tempted by foods I know I should not eat. Well maybe tempted isn't the right word, missing certian foods I would say. For exampel the other night my son was eating PB&J on nice soft bread and it sure looked good but I know I would not eat it because I would not want to feel sick like I know it would make me feel. There are somethings that are just not as good, that you can not find a replacement for. but I did find a replacement for chocolate cake thanks to a response to a post I did here. Was the best birthday cake I ever made myself. For some of us it is still hard even knowing what eating the wrong food will do to us. I do not eat food containing gluten but I do miss it at times. For those of you who are so very strong my hat is off to you pass me some of your strength.

[LadyCyclist87]

"I hope this doesn't come across wrong. In reading the above posts I found myself feeling condemend for sometimes feeling tempted by foods I know I should not eat. Well maybe tempted isn't the right word, missing certian foods I would say."

I don't think you came across anything wrong, Chrissyb, b/c that's how I felt after reading some of the above posts as well.

I know that what I'm doing is wrong, that what I'm doing is making me physically ill, and that I need to stop it. But please allow me to explain that the reason I kept on cheating initially is b/c I remained mostly asymptomatic. When I was asymptomatic to these foods, I thought that I was in complete control at the time. But as the years passed, and the more frequent my cheating became, the more it made me ill without me even realizing it. Now that I AM symptomatic when I eat gluten, dairy, eggs, etc., I WANT to stop but CANNOT b/c my mind has established that false "control" it gives me. Before I started cheating, the last time I was sick from the gluten I ate was a very, very long time ago as an infant (and I of course do not remember the effects of that). Trust me, if cheating made me horribly ill the first time around, I wouldn't have kept on doing it either.

As far as the rest of these posts go, thank you so much (again). I found the courage to tell one of my best friends yesterday about my situation, so things are going (slightly) in the right direction. I don't want to make myself sick anymore.

[gfpaperdoll]

It is just that some of us have been gluten-free for a long time. & some of us have done a lot of research, attended a lot of meetings, & read a lot of books, & diagnosed a lot of people, in addition to seeing our families suffer & yes some have died undiagnosed. My mother died of colon cancer.

I have been gluten-free & dairy free for 4 years, before that I was mostly wheat free for 10 years, & before that I was allergic to barley & oats & many more foods since I was 25. I am now 61. So you could really say that for the past 40 years I have had experience with diet changes. When I went wheat free 14 years ago, I got physically better & a lot of my food allergies went away & although I could not eat wheat, I was able to add back in so much food that I was sooooo happy to just not eat wheat. Then when I found out about gluten & cross contamination etc. 4 years ago, my health went up another notch, whoooppe, I was amazed!!!

As we all know barley malt is in everything. So, since I was 25, I could not eat a bagel, donut, bought hamburger bun etc., I did things like order a hamburger & take off the bun! I made the best homemade breads, & pastries that you can imagine. My barley allergy is severe & among other things causes projectile vomiting.

I am just giving you this information to say that we are not all in the same place. How you feel now is going to be different than how you will feel 40 years from now. It is okay to yearn for the food that you cannot have because that is where you are at this time. I am not there anymore & cannot even remember that stage. I have learned so much about the effect of grains that I think they should banish the stuff from the face of the Earth. But I pretty much keep that thought to myself.

& yes, I also eat quite well, today for lunch I packed cold boiled shrimp, in a Taste of Thai Sweet Red Chili Sauce with sliced cantaloupe, & sliced pear - you can also just use cantaloupe & red & yellow bell peppers with the shrimp & sauce to cover, then I also had deviled eggs, baby carrots & pecans & a banana . Dinner tonight will be leftovers from last night, steamed broccoli stirred in garlic & onions, salmon patties, baked sweet potato, fried plaintains, & a mixed salad with homegrown tomatoes.

[Lockheed]

I have the same problem but with a credit card. Anytime I'm broke I get so irritated that I just go buy something. It's like being able to say "ha! See! I may be broke but I can still buy stuff!" I don't like to be controlled by people or circumstances. But I'm not gluten free by circumstance. I'm gluten free because the alternative is not being gluten free and being really sick and then being controlled by circumstance because I can't do for myself like I should be able to. By being gluten free I am healthier and more empowered and I have more control over my life. Don't know if that helps at all.

And just as a side note, I was okay with all my symptoms right up until I started breaking bones randomly. So because you think you are asymptomatic doesn't mean that you really aren't suffering any sort of side effects.

[jax13]

As other people have said the best thing you could have done was admit to the rest of us of your cheating habits. I think it is a great idea if you keep someone posted daily on what you are cheating with. Im curious what types of food you cheat with? If you can let me know I can help you come up with some possible alternatives. I have become an expert on the "being creative with food alternatives." A quick background in my history: I was diagnosed with Celiac Disease in February of this year and have lived the last 25 years with Ulcerative Colitis. I have had 6 abdominal surgeries and have no colon left. Before the Celiac diagnosis I have lived the last couple of years on protein shakes prescribed by a physician, BREAD/CARBS and CANDY. No fruits, veggies, sauces, nuts, egg, dairy, nothing! So after the Celiac diagnosis I had to become quite creative on fulfilling my cravings. Let me know what you crave and maybe I can help you with some suggestions.

[Rebecca's mom]

Dear Lady Cyclist,

I have found what Takala said to be true. If you go on a low-carb, high protein AND HIGH FAT diet, you may find that you aren't tempted to cheat, because you will be full. The thing with a gluten sensitivity/intolerance is that your body isn't absorbing any of the nutrients that you feed it, so you will continue to feel hungry - your brain doesn't know that your stomach is full. There are some interesting articles out on the Internet about why low-carb, high protein and fat diets work - enter "What if bad fat isn't so bad?" and "The Cure for Diabetes" to start your research.

Our 7-year-old daughter, Rebecca, was diagnosed with celiac disease 2 months ago, and she had absolutely NO symptoms whatsoever. Her test results, however, were off the chart and her intestinal biopsy revealed that she had borderline Stage IV damage. If it hadn't been for her pediatrician deciding to screen all of his patients with Down syndrome for Celiac Disease - that population has a 1-in-8 chance of having celiac disease - it might not have been caught until she was having some very serious health issues. As I said, she had NO symptoms that we were aware of. Her results even caught her pediatrician by surprise, too!

What you may find if you decide to go on a low-carb diet is what I have found over the past 2 months. You will have tons of energy and you won't be hungry. I have found that I only have to cut way down on the grain portion of my diet - I have been able to eat potatoes and Snickers bars and still lose weight (15 pounds in 2 months without really trying). Believe me, any diet that lets me eat Snickers without any guilt is tops in my book! What I have found is that I don't crave the high sugar, high carb foods anymore, which is really saying something.

In your case, I think that you just wanted to "fit in" when you were a teenager, and that is PERFECTLY NORMAL - no one wants to be "that kid" when they are in junior high and high school. Since you didn't have any visible evidence that your body didn't like having gluten in it, you were able to "get away" with cheating on the gluten-free diet. Chances are if you go back on a gluten-free diet you will not suffer any long-term consequences as a result of your earlier eating habits. Now that you are more mature, you KNOW that you have to do this - no one else can make you do it. It is obvious that you are now willing to do what you know your body needs, and my guess is that since you are the one making this decision, you won't find it nearly as hard as you think it will be. Fortunately, the food that is on the market now is much better than what your parents had to choose from when you were a baby!

I think if you can take the 2-pronged approach of dropping wheat from your diet and going on a modified lower-carb diet, you will not find it difficult to stick to the gluten-free lifestyle. I haven't eaten for emotional reasons much in the past 2 months, probably because my brain knows that my stomach is satisfied.

Good luck with this, and don't beat yourself up over this, sweetie - the fact that you have reached out to people tells me that you want to get back to being gluten free. That's a very encouraging thing, indeed!

Teresa Koch

Fort Worth, Texas

[MDRB]

Your body can react to certain foods in the same way it reacts to nicotine, or other drugs - you get addicted.

This is certainly the case with gluten foods. But once you break the habit, you realize that whatever you were craving was not actually that good in the first place. I found after diagnosis, it took me about six weeks before I stopped craving bread etc.

If I were you, I would throw out any gluten foods that you have in your house and do a big shop, making sure you have plenty of gluten free meals and snacks around so that you have no excuse to eat gluten.

Good luck