Freaking Out

[GIJane]

Hello All,

I'm writing here because I feel like some of you may understand what just happened to me. I am at work and a co-worker who started working me in September said, "you look really thin these days. Have you lost weight?" As best as I can tell, I have not. My weight seems to bob up and down, never gaining or losing more than 2 lbs, no matter how much I eat. In any event, her question freaked me out and I started feeling incredibly, uncontrollably anxious.

I know this question--have you lost weight?--would not phase most people--in fact, most people might even think it was a compliment! It just causes me to worry. I was diagnosed with C in June 2005, having suffered near constant D and steady weight loss in the year leading up to my diagnosis. In total, I lost about 10-15 pounds (I don't know exactly because I never used to weigh myself regularly.)

Now I associate unexplained weight loss with unknown illness, lab tests, and concerned doctor faces. I don't want to lose weight; I'd much rather gain it. Since my diagnosis I have been on a strict gluten-free diet but have still had digestive problems (largely due to microscopic colitis). I eat a lot and I only ever seem to put on a pound or two and lose it weeks later. I've read in various posts that it often takes people 6-8 months to put on weight. I'm in that range and feeling great, but still thin. I don't think I look sickly, but I am definitely slim.

The other piece of this is that before last year, I never had problems gaining weight. Starting my freshmen year in college I was always about 5 lbs--sometimes 10 lbs--overweight in a family full of incredibly thin people. Now it's started to feel natural to be thin and I wonder if this is just the way my body wants to be/is supposed to be and if I used to overeat to compensate for the nutrients I wasn't getting due to celiacs. So hard to tell.

I guess I'm just largely venting, sloughing off the anxiety that comes with the possibility of having lost weight... it makes me realize that I haven't totally gotten over having celiacs. I can deal with the gluten-free diet. It has just been hard for me to come to terms with the idea that something is not completely right with my body.

Anyway, I'd love words of support, understanding. Thank you.

[thomas3000]

Your weight will normalize eventually.. Your not too thin it's just that everyone else is too fat!!! Almost everyone is overweight in this day and age. Don't listen to anyone cuz they're just jealous of you!! IF you feel great that's all that matters!!!

[GIJane]

Your weight will normalize eventually.. Your not too thin it's just that everyone else is too fat!!! Almost everyone is overweight in this day and age. Don't listen to anyone cuz they're just jealous of you!! IF you feel great that's all that matters!!!

Thank you, Thomas. It's strange how reassuring your words are, but they are. I appreciate them.

[zip2play]

Before someone should tell you you aren't too thin or too fat, they would either need to see you or know your weight and heighth! Although I do agree, people are heavier which makes them think everyone should be. That may not always be true.

What is your height and weight? (If I can ask?)

Monica

[Smunkeemom]

I would ignore people. They tell me all the time "you look like you are losing weight", I am not. They think it's a compliment, well, if it's not true it's a lie. They worry about my 2 year old being to heavy (she gets too much starch on that gluten free diet) and my 4 year old being too thin (she isn't getting enough food on that gluten free diet) It can't be both ways!

Anyway, you should keep an eye on your weight, if you feel like you are losing too much see your doctor, or do a food diary, once I was loosing weight rapidly so I kept track of what I was eating and it turned out I was skipping too many meals.

So, in conclusion, people in general who comment on your weight are clueless. Ignore them. Eat good gluten free food and all will be well.

If by some chance you can't ignore them I think Miss Manners once said that when people ask about your weight

"gee, have you lost weight?"

just say

"I haven't really noticed"

and then change the subject.

[eleep]

I've had people comment on my thinness all my life as though it was the most natural thing in the world for a clerk at the convenience store to say: "Do you ever eat?". I totally feel you on this one -- but remember that how you feel is the most important thing here -- especially in light of the fact that these are health-related issues for you.

I should add that -- even when my weight was at a "healthy" level (and I felt good) people still talked about it -- there's so much free-floating anxiety about being overweight and obese in our culture that I think some people tend to take it out on anyone who doesn't seem to be struggling with those same issues.

[Felidae]

I would agree that maybe you are supposed to be thin especially since the rest of your family is slim. I have been skinny my whole life and it is genetic. But I have never felt better since going gluten-free. People at work who I have recently been telling about my gluten-free lifestyle are saying "Oh, so that's why you are so thin." But, I've always been thin. My doctor says this is the healthiest that I have been. I would like to gain another 5 to 10 pounds, but I haven't been able to. That amount of weight would put me back to what I was at the peak atheletic time of my life, but I'm not sure that I could ever be that person again. So, for now my weight is perfect.

[lorka150]

GIJane,

I was a healthy 125lbs, and then it started going downhill. I think I (perhaps) got more sensitive when I was gluten-free and then gluten kept sneaking it's way in. Testing the waters. It was horrible.

Anyway, I hit 78lbs. We found out that I was consuming Bob's Red Mill carob the whole time, and unbeknownst to me, that is not made in their gluten-free facility, even though it was gluten-free.

So, I stopped eating that immediately. All of a sudden, I was starving all the time. Perhaps becasue I was now absorbing? I gained 15 lbs. in about two weeks. I'm at a stall now at about 94lbs, but I'll take that over 78 any day. I'm ridiculously underweight (healthy for me would be about 120), but I know slow and steady wins the race.

I get snide remarks constantly, and if I let them get me down, it's going to be my demise. Keep your head up!

[GIJane]

hi All,

Thanks for the replies.

Monica, you asked my height/weight. I'm 5'7" and weigh about 125 lbs.

[key]

GIJane,

THat isn't that bad of weight. That is my cousin's height and she weighs anywhere from 115 to 125lbs.

I am 5'2 inches and 100lbs and a ton of family and friends think I am too thin! I swear like someone said before that they are jealous. I am just about 90% sure this is the case with my mom and several others. I think it is abnormal to be thin in this country. I would be overweight if I lived in France. I don't undereat, etc. Sometimes I have worried that I have been too thin, because I have been rather sickly this year and my face is alot skinnier, which I would have died for in my teens, because i had a rounder face and hated it and now I feel it is making me prematuraly look older then I am. My hairdresser told me yesterday I look completely normal to her, so that made me feel better. Nothing like having people tell you you look bad, because you are skinny! It is just wrong!

MOnica

[skinnyminny]

I understand this constant worry of being too thin, I try so hard to gain weight but my genes are pre determined to be thin, I am your height at 5' 7' and weigh 106 I am 19 and get a real hard time from people and have a hard time finding clothes to fit, but I believe I am healthy, I never miss a meal and try my hardest, I think thomas was right that the general population is jealous and over weight

[slpinsd]

GI JANE-

I am PRAYING to weigh what you do. I am 5'7'' and I weigh 100 lbs. 125 is the most I ever weighed, I would be happy to be at 110. All in all, I lost about 20 lbs due to this thing- I've gained 3 lbs in 2 mos. going gluten-free. Don't worry, you look great! I think some people say that because they are just jealous.

[Guest Robbin]

I agree, it is sometimes jealousy. When I was young and weighed 120 (I am about 5'6") everyone told me I was too skinny. I was not. Now, they all seem much friendlier to me! (I am now overweight) Hopefully, now that I am on the right path, I will lose it. I know it is very hard sometimes to gain weight. My sons are having serious problems gaining, so I see both sides of the issue. Unfortunately women can be that way to other women. I seriously noticed a huge difference in the way other women treat me now as an overweight woman, versus before as a healthy-weight woman. Just eat healthy, and don't listen to anyone else!!

[skinnyminny]

GI JANE-

I am PRAYING to weigh what you do. I am 5'7'' and I weigh 100 lbs. 125 is the most I ever weighed, I would be happy to be at 110. All in all, I lost about 20 lbs due to this thing- I've gained 3 lbs in 2 mos. going gluten-free. Don't worry, you look great! I think some people say that because they are just jealous.

Yea I got done to 100 this summer just cause I was so active and eat really healthy on this diet! I am 19 and I got diagnosed with Celiac 5 years ago, the most I have ever weighed is 115, so this really isn't too much of a drastic change, but I am now up to 106 and I eat lots of peanutbutter and try to eat every few hours

[key]

Robbin,

How sad that women are this way! It has happened to me though and seriously I am not too thin for my height at all. My mom I swear is the worst with me. SHe used to weigh less then me and I think she wishes she was still thin. SHe is still a great size for her age, but she is always telling me I am anorexic and it just isn't true at all! My husband is with me all the time and he knows I am not anorexic. I just don't care what she says anymore. I love her to death, but I have to ignore some of her comments sometimes.

Monica

[Claire]

I will post again this weight gain tip. It is an old remedy. Take gingerale and cream (heavy, light - even half/half) in equal portions - once or twice each day. A juice glassful is about right. This is rich, tasty and if you continue with it for a couple of months you will see definite results. Claire

[RebeccaM]

This is so interesting to me-

Just to preface this comment, I am a uterine cancer survivor, who is 5'6" and 109 lbs. I have gained almost twenty pounds in the years since my cancer! I am working really hard at it.

So anyway- I went to see a new doctor today- an endocrinologist about the hot flashes that I have (surgical menopause as a twenty something!). So while I was there, she said to me " you know,. you are really underweight... You need to gain weight- this is serious.

When I told her that I had gained weight in the last ten years, she blew it off. I told her that my highest weight pre-cancer was 120, and she said - well, even that is WAY too low! WHich as a dietitian , I know is untrue. The BMI shows that it is perfectly acceptable to be 5'6" and 120. Then she said "every dietitian that I've ever met has a problem with weight". As if this were my fault- or my choosing!!!!

I am sorry to ramble on, just really pissed that I was treated so horribly. I told her that I eat over 3,000 calories a day, and she said, well i guess that's not enough.

Oh well. I guess that I am running up against a wall if I think that I can change her attitude.

Thanks for the vent session

-Becca