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Feelings Of Guilt


positivenrgfairy

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positivenrgfairy Apprentice

I am feeling guilty today, not because I ate a cheesy biscuit last night, but because I think everyone is exhausted from me talking incessantly about gluten and celiac. its suddenly hard for people to cook for me or order for me when we order take out at work, and I feel like I'm being a burden to everyone. Everyone has been really accommodating so far, but I feel like they are just tolerating me. now, to be fair, I can now be sure that the cheesy biscuit I ate last night is f*&$ing with my emotions and making me depressed and bloated, thus contributing to the emotions I'm feeling. did anyone else feel guilty at first or afraid that others were annoyed by their sudden lifestyle change? am I overreacting? I think I've kind of been in denial about this since I found out about it, and now that im being more vigilant with the diet (obviously except for the cheesy biscuit) I am understanding that I clearly DO have at the very least some form of gluten sensitivity. I have a lot of travel plans in the very near future that I'm worried about too for the same reasons, but I guess that's unrelated.


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Jestgar Rising Star

Did you feel guilty when you became vegetarian?

Did you talk about that incessantly when you first made the change?

Did you feel like you were a burden to people because they had to accommodate your lifestyle choices?

positivenrgfairy Apprentice
Did you feel guilty when you became vegetarian?

Did you talk about that incessantly when you first made the change?

Did you feel like you were a burden to people because they had to accommodate your lifestyle choices?

I did not feel guilty or like I was being a burden when I became vegetarian. However, I did talk about it incessantly.

ordering and cooking without meat is slightly more cut and dry, in my opinion.

Jestgar Rising Star

I disagree about the cut and dried part, but my point is that you didn't feel bad with that lifestyle change, why this one? It's no different. Both were undertaken for your health's sake.

darlindeb25 Collaborator

No, I didn't. This isn't something we do on purpose, it's a poison we are trying to stay away from. Being gluten intolerant is not different than saying you are diabetic...people tend to understand daibetes a little bit more, yet it's the same type of principle...we have to eat differently, period. People just do not understand how serious being gluten free is. They also do not understand what gluten is.

The people at work make me feel like I talk about gluten free all the time, yet if I don't, they are offering me foods I can't have all the time. "You can have a cookie, there isn't any gluten in the ingredients." They just do not understand what gluten is.

There is no reason to feel guilty.

VioletBlue Contributor

I stopped eating in restaurants after I went gluten-free. It's just too hard to order and way too easy for them to make mistakes. Instead i started planning out every meal and making sure I took care of my own needs.

While I'm not saying your friends are annoyed with you because you are not eating gluten, I am saying that you need to take charge of what you eat and make sure you provide for you without necessarily relying on friends or restaurants who by and large don't have a clue when it comes to allergen protocols. No one else can look out for your health the way you can. They don't have to understand what you're going through or what you can and cannot eat. But you do need to be proactive and look after yourself.

JillianLindsay Enthusiast

I agree with people telling you not to feel guilty for something you didn't choose and for looking out for your health. We shouldn't apologize for not wanting to be sick! I also completely understand the feelings you are experiencing. I went through major anxiety and guilt around food when I first went gluten-free. I still get anxiety around family dinners, going to a new restaurant, and grocery shopping at a new food mart.

Just as your health and recovery will be a roller coaster as you heal, so too will adjusting to a new diet and lifestyle, especially when you have set backs. When I get glutened or end up somewhere where they don't have anything safe for me to eat, I feel sorry for myself and feel generally sad. When I get glutened I get very moody and depressed, and from what I've read a lot of otheres do too, so we're not alone.

I think you will overcome this guilt as you become more educated on celiac disease. With practice, you'll get better at talking to friends, family, and restaurant staff/management. You'll find a style that works best for you and your friends and family will become better educated from all the talking you're doing. For a little while it felt like my new diagnosis was all we ever talked about, but eventually everyone got used to it and it became "old news" (in a good way). Now it's second nature for people to ask "can you have this?" and for me to ask for gluten-free options wherever I go. I am getting over the guilt and apologies and starting to become more assertive and taking charge of my health.

In the end, we're responsible for our own health and need to protect ourselves from getting sick. Others will get used to it and if they're worth your time they'll support you and be as helpful as they know how to be :)

GOOD LUCK!

Jillian

I am feeling guilty today, not because I ate a cheesy biscuit last night, but because I think everyone is exhausted from me talking incessantly about gluten and celiac. its suddenly hard for people to cook for me or order for me when we order take out at work, and I feel like I'm being a burden to everyone. Everyone has been really accommodating so far, but I feel like they are just tolerating me. now, to be fair, I can now be sure that the cheesy biscuit I ate last night is f*&$ing with my emotions and making me depressed and bloated, thus contributing to the emotions I'm feeling. did anyone else feel guilty at first or afraid that others were annoyed by their sudden lifestyle change? am I overreacting? I think I've kind of been in denial about this since I found out about it, and now that im being more vigilant with the diet (obviously except for the cheesy biscuit) I am understanding that I clearly DO have at the very least some form of gluten sensitivity. I have a lot of travel plans in the very near future that I'm worried about too for the same reasons, but I guess that's unrelated.

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Lexi Enthusiast

I FEEL guilty ALL THE TIME!!! Celiac Disease has drastically changed my life. It consumes me because every meal has to be so carefully planned out now. I always dread going to social functions and out to eat. Thanksgiving Dinner and Christmas Dinner are just NOT enjoyable like they used to be. Everyone reacts differently - some people feel like they have to try and accomodate me, and some people always feel guilty because they have nothing I can eat. When people do make food for me, I am always nervous to eat it, because lets face it, MOST PEOPLE don't really GET what Celiac Disease really means. It does get a little easier with each passing day, but I Really do not find this lifestyle to be very enjoyable. It's TOO much work, but life goes on, and this is just how it was meant to be for some reason.

ang1e0251 Contributor

I had some guilt feelings at one time but I don't any more. After all, I don't judge people as difficult because they have diabetes or are picky eaters. I know lots of people with both issues. If I don't judge people that way, why should I think they are judging me that way?

You must have confidence in who you are and be OK with that. We all indulge new parents who can only talk about all the cute things their babies do, even if we aren't that impressed. It's the focus of their life right now and they can't help but share it. celiac disease is the focus of our life right now and yeah, I'm probably guilty of talking about it too much. But my friends will indulge me as I indulge them as they talk about their life. It's what we do as friends.

Life's too short to put guilt on yourself, let it go and just be happy that you've found a way to be healthy.

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