Coworkers Are Not So Understanding

[Jestgar]

Yep, listen to the bunnie. Post what you can and can't eat and we'll try to come up with some variety for you.

[virginiagl]

Thanks bunnie! I can eat chicken, romaine lettuce, broccoli, asparagus, bell peppers, squash, kale, apples, potatoes, blueberries, blackberries, most other fruits but citrus upsets my stomach, turkey, rice, tomatoes although sometimes they upset my stomach too, almonds, carrots, green beans, black beans, and mushrooms. It's a small list I know... but I'm probably forgetting some things.

Definite things to NOT eat include all dairy, anything soy, spinach, artichokes, eggplant, beef, most seafood, gluten of course, corn, strawberries, and refined sugar since yeast seems to be a concern.

[sandsurfgirl]

It sounds like your son has it too. Your ex is a real idiot for saying those things. It sounds like you need a definitive diagnosis to make your ex comply. If your son is wheat free and low gluten it will skew the tests to a false negative. Get him back on gluten and get him to a pediatrician for testing.

This is not alternative medical crap as you well know, and you need to impress on him that it's an autoimmune disorder and it IS genetic. With your son's symptoms he must be tested thoroughly for it and if he comes up negative he should do the diet and see if he can be diagnosed by dietary response. There is nothing alternative about it.

I would think that your son being ill and your ex refusing to acknowledge it or try to do something about it is in your favor legally.

If I were you, I would pull up some stuff on the internet and print it up for him to read. Sit down with him calmly (easier said than done I know) and state the MEDICAL facts for him. Don't go by stuff you've read on the forums because he won't believe it. Use the official descriptions on this website and others and print them for him.

I'm SO sorry you have to deal with his ignorance on top of all this.

[DownWithGluten]

Sorry to hear all that. And I can empathize with that incident where your friend brought over the marinated chicken even though said it shouldn't have it. There have been many times where I've felt that I'm secretly 'insulting' someone when I turn down their food. Like, they try to help or they do this or that...but something will be wrong with it and I still don't eat it and, I do feel bad. Next time, I would say you should just politely decline and still not eat it. I know that's hard but...yeah. And yeah people just don't understand. They complain if they have to give up one little thing...and it's like okay, imagine removing your freedom to eat places completely. Everything for gluten-intolerants...we have to plan ahead always. All the festive things at work usually don't have anything I can eat, so I awkwardly stand there etc. By now most people know the drill but still. It is a big adjustment. You just simply can't eat freely.

And then like you said, you even have more intolerances than just gluten. And I've gotten sick of chicken too but I still eat it. Given that I hate seafood, and growing up our mom banned beef and pork so I'm not used to eating those anymore (I'll eat beef now and then now, but... not a lot)...all I eat pretty much always is chicken too Chicken this, rice that (whether actual rice, or pasta made from rice...rice rice rice!!) Before I went gluten free, I thought butter/grease/cheese/that caused the problem, so at resturaunts I almost ALWAYS got grilled chicken on some bread. I got annoyed with that too. Little did I know the friggin bread was the culprit. My mom always taught me to eat bread before greasy food, to sop up the grease so as not to get an upset stomach. Ha! It was never the grease, it was the bread!! Anyway...

We feel your pain here. Ramble and rant all you want. And you should take the board up on its offer...post the foods you can eat and we'll offer suggestions.

[Mtndog]

Oh honey, big HUGS for you!!!

Come here and rant anytime. This is the place where everybody understands.

Absolutely- for the first month I ate peanut butter and gluten-free cookies because I had NO idea what to eat and was so tired from being sick that I didn't have the energy to figure it out. EVERYTHING made me sick. I am VERY happy to tell you it DOES get better.

Yep, listen to the bunnie. Post what you can and can't eat and we'll try to come up with some variety for you.

Yup- we've all been there! HUGS

[cadams5120]

My experience has been completely different at my office. I work at an urgent care, and while I was going through this process, I had a lot of support from my peers. I dont own a microwave. I am one of those weirdos that is conviced that nothing good comes from something that can heat in 30 seconds. I also hate lingering smells because for some reason I am advanced in the olfactics region. However I'm a realist. People don't have a lot of money these days. Maybe the only way they're going to get lunch is to heat up what they had the night before. Yes it's annoying, but you should be happy that they're being economical and not shoving the dreaded fast food in their mouths!

[sandsurfgirl]

Start a new thread with your list of foods you can eat so you don't have to scroll through 3 pages to read the replies.

[Roadki11]

It appears as though I'm going to be the lone dissenting vote here. I do not agree at all that you should have to refrain from heating up a platter of fish at the office. I am not at all fond of the smell of coffee, but if I want to eat in our break room I've got to deal with it since a pot of coffee brews there 24 hours a day - literally.

I also find the pungent odors...and some of the sights...of Indian cuisine and some Filipino foods to be unsettling to my stomach, but I have absolutely no right to tell my Hindu and Filipino co-workers that they can't bring their traditional foods to work. Nor, do they have the right to limit what I can bring in on what is already a very limited diet.

I say, screw the insensitive people and keep bringing your fish. You are doing what is best for your health, physically AND mentally, and health trumps odors any day. That said, I would be certain to try to bring in fishes that are mild and don't have a lot of "fishy" smell. Also, I'd be sure to pre-cook the fish at home to limit the amount of heating time and, hopefully, the lingering odors. Also, you could give a show of trying to accommodate by purchasing and bringing in a can or two of air sprays/deodorizers in pleasant scents that your co-workers could spritz as needed to help mask any objectionable odors.

Don't let them get you down! I ran into a similar insensitivity at work, as well. Eventually my co-workers started asking me all about the diet restrictions and they soon realized how difficult it can be...and became much more sensitive, understanding and supportive in the process.

Definitely agree with the above.

In fact over and above this complain to HR (or your boss if you dont have an HR department) that you feel discriminated against by your co-workers on the grounds of your dietary requirements.

Discrimination is normally a word that sets alarm bells ringing along with liability, harrassment and other such fun words.

[Jestgar]

I went back to the list of foods that I am supposed to avoid and also learned I am not supposed to eat avacado! I love avacado and have been eating it since I found out about my allergies and intolerances...doh!

Based on what? Allergy testing is not reliable. Do the foods make you feel bad? Or were you handed a list of some sort and told "no"?

[AKcollegestudent]

Could you explain the limited diet you're on? I know this is intrusive, but it's helpful for us to know why you're that limited. Because while allergy tests aren't always the most enlightening, they can be useful starting places. And I started out on an elimination diet; I'm down to only a few things that I definitely cannot eat from the several pages of things that I started with.

[sandsurfgirl]

Definitely agree with the above.

In fact over and above this complain to HR (or your boss if you dont have an HR department) that you feel discriminated against by your co-workers on the grounds of your dietary requirements.

Discrimination is normally a word that sets alarm bells ringing along with liability, harrassment and other such fun words.

Oh dear Lord, please don't throw around the words discrimination and harassment to bully people into doing what you want. That is why we have all this paranoia about liability and why we are going to LOSE support from companies and workplaces becuase if they do try to accomodate someone and don't do it right, people will scream discrimination to get their way. Inflammatory unreasonable behavior is why makeup companies won't say their products are gluten free in order to cover their behinds in case of lawsuits.

Those words are not "fun." They are serious and should only be used when they are APPROPRIATE. It also makes you look unreasonable and will LOSE any sympathy you have gained when you act like that. More than likely, you will have to watch every single thing you do because one toe out of line will get you fired so they don't have to deal with you. I own a business and believe me if an employee tried to bully me over something like that I would be far less likely to go out of my way for them, and far more likely to scrutinize everything they did.

How in the world is it discrimination that they don't want to smell the rank smell of fish all day long? Maybe it's discrimination against them because the smell is making them want to vomit. I would be seriously ill if I had to smell fish in my office, it bothers me that much. I'd like you see you prove discrimination or harassment in this case. I'd love to see the attorney that would be mad enough to take a case like that.

Empty threats will never get you anywhere.

[Mtndog]

Oh dear Lord, please don't throw around the words discrimination and harassment to bully people into doing what you want.

I agree. You will get MUCH further with people if you sit them down and explain your situation. Tell them, "Hey, I get sick if I eat anything other than...." More than likely, they will sympathize. You catch a lot more flies with honey than vinegar!

[celiac-mommy]

I agree. You will get MUCH further with people if you sit them down and explain your situation. Tell them, "Hey, I get sick if I eat anything other than...." More than likely, they will sympathize. You catch a lot more flies with honey than vinegar!

I agree as well. You'll end up alienating yourself more if you go to HR. Try to explain your side, maybe they'll explain their side as well. If it's making them sick, you wouldn't want to the the cause of that, since you know how it feels