Dear Chocolate

[Rowena]

Dear Chocolate,

I know I shouldn't have you in my life. But you are everywhere. And you taste so good. You are the main ingredient in my favorite cookies to make. I love licking the batter in which you are omnipresent off of my fingers. I love eating the baked cookies of which you are in throughout. I want to attack the candy dish at work and just grab all the milky ways from it. But I can't! You make me horribly sick. Even when I am taking my acid reflux medicine it just ain't enough. Must you be so cruel to me chocolate? I ate six cookies last night and about the equivalent in batter.

Some times it is easy to avoid your presence, like when I am at work and really busy. But when you taunt me so in my baking, then how can I resist. You make gluten free diets look so simple! I hate you chocolate. Just go away and leave me alone. Please? Don't be so tempting. I love baking with you because it makes everyone so happy to have you. But must you. Really? I don't have nephews at my house to taste test no more. So please remove your tempting self, so that I can bake. I love baking, and I love making chocolatey things for other people because it makes them so happy. But you make me so miserable. So BACK OFF!

Signed with hate,

Someone who hates you and the way you make her feel.

(If this were a handwritten letter, it would have a number of holes in the page from pressing the pen too hard, and heavy penmanship with a lot of anger present.)

[Lisa]

Chocolate gives me reflux, too!

[Rowena]

Yeah chocolate is not friendly... Reflux.... grr... But beyond it giving me reflux, I think I may actually be plain old intolerant to it. Reflux meds do help too much. Though they do help a bit. (We tested this theory when my OBGYN figured out a few years back that I have acid reflux. When I did go on meds for it, I did feel better. But I am on meds for it now and it helps only to a degree.) And I've gone off milk... so that don't provide me much relief like it used to. So yeah.

[GFinDC]

How about carob as an alternative? Kinda similar. Are you sure you are reacting to the chocolate? Could it be the soy or the dairy in the chocolate instead?

[Rowena]

I am pretty sure it is the cocoa I am reactin to, considerin the nature of everythin I eat thats chocolate. But I will have to look for the carob and try that... Although I think I am to some degree lactose intolerant...

[Lisa]

I am pretty sure it is the cocoa I am reactin to, considerin the nature of everythin I eat thats chocolate. But I will have to look for the carob and try that... Although I think I am to some degree lactose intolerant...

Hey Rowena! I am finding your font kinda hard to read. If you could enlarge it, it would be helpful

[Rowena]

sure thing Lisa, I can understand what ye mean. Just didnt bother with it, as I dont have to read my own posts again very much.

This better?

[RiceGuy]

There are two basic types of carob - Virginia Roast, and Dark Roast. You may prefer one more than the other. You may also like to add some mesquite powder to it, as well as some vanilla.

BTW, ever try raw, unpasteurized, unfiltered Apple Cider Vinegar to resolve the heartburn? Many swear by ACV for eliminating heartburn, even curing it. Also, HCL w/pepsin is supposed to be helpful, depending on the cause of the problem. Many times, it is not too much stomach acid, but too little, which causes heartburn. And, acid reducers can, over time, damage the stomach's ability to produce Intrinsic Factor. This condition is known as Pernicious Anemia, which makes supplementing vitamin B12 necessary.

[Rowena]

Dear Chocolate,

I am pretty sure I told you to back off in my last letter, and yet you aint done so yet. I went out to dinner tonight, and of course, I had to try the gluten-free dessert there after hearin so much about it. And of course... CHOCOLATE! You were there! Why are you so persistant in tryin to convince me that you are ok? You aint. SO BUG OFF! LEAVE ME BE!!!!!!!!!!!!!! And for heavens sake, if you must convince me that you are really okay, can ye at least wait until I recover from the last time you tempted me and I succumbed to you?

Thanks.

Okay, now that I got that rant out, I can say what I really wanted to say. I sorta took people's advice and tried carob. Though admittedly I tried it with rice milk, because I wanted to make sure I had some form of dilution with it to try and ease the reaction slightly. But guess what? It didnt do nothin to me system! YAY!!!!!!!!!!!!! Course maybe givin me an alternative to choccy was not such a good thin, as bein choccy free kept me away from all the bad stuff... *chuckle* Oh well.

As for cider vinegar, never thought to try it, but then again just the thought of drinkin it makes me cringe...

[GFinDC]

Good to hear the carob is working out for you Rowena. I got a round cardboard container of Chatfield's carob powder a while back so I can use it instead of chocolate powder. I didn't know about the dark vs light roasts that Riceguy mentioned. I might have to look for that. The Chatfield's package says it's processed on shared equipment with fish oil, so that brand might not work for you.

[Swimmr]

I am SO very glad I don't react to cocoa!!

I eat Boom choco boom dark chocolate bars - they're allergen free! And they are YUMMY. I buy the morsels too for baking cookies and cakes/brownies.

[Rowena]

Dear Chocolate,

You've thus far since my last letter heeded my warnings. Sort of. Minus the brownies my husband had to confiscate, the mints from the work party that i ate nearly a box of. But really, just the mere mention of you makes me want to have you back in my life. For heaven's sake, must you really make this so hard? For some reason you are the staple in everyone's life, and as such, you are the most common gift I get. Or the recommendation for a problem. But you just make it worse. And I want to cry because, well, you are EVERYWHERE, and how desperately do I wish I could eat you. Please tell all your friends to stop making me jealous.

Thanks,

LEAVE ME THE HELL BE